The 1980s, Part III (1985–1990), Seasons 11–15
“I’ve returned because (NBC) asked me to return and because the show was in danger of being canceled. When I left the show, I think I wanted it to die. As it stayed on, I began to take it as a compliment, and as time went by, it seemed to me that it belonged on the air. I just didn’t want to see it go off.”
When Brandon Tartikoff, the head of NBC’s Entertainment Division, asked Lorne Michaels to return to Saturday Night Live as executive producer, Michaels was advised by some of his friends not to return to the show. In a 1992 interview with Playboy magazine, he recalled how someone he identifies only as “a very powerful guy in the industry” told him, “You don’t do Saturday Night Live, somebody who wants to be you does it.” Michaels thought, “I didn’t mind being me. I liked doing it.”
Season 11 (1985–1986) was another transitional season for SNL. The talent slate was wiped clean in terms of the cast, and like his predecessors, Jean Doumanian and Dick Ebersol, Michaels was faced with the arduous task of reinventing the wheel. The one major difference is that Michaels invented the wheel, and he had a clear plan as to what needed to be fixed. In August 1985, Michaels told the New York Times he was busy hiring writers and a new cast. He assured fans of the show that the basic format would not be changed. “It’s nice that it has lasted 10 years,” he admitted, “It needs to be spruced up with fresh and energetic people. One of the things that got lost was the ensemble feeling.”
Another major change was Michaels’s decision to serve as the show’s executive producer. As Susan Orlean reported in an article for Rolling Stone at the end of season 11, Michaels still had the final say on all matters pertaining to the show, but he would leave the “daily decisions” to his two producers, SNL alums Al Franken and Tom Davis, despite the fact that the pair had no producing experience. In addition to Franken and Davis, Michaels rehired former staff writer Jim Downey to be head writer; Eugene Lee, the show’s original production designer, who would share credit with his successor, Akira Yoshimura, who had remained with the show since the beginning; and Howard Shore as the show’s music producer. Michaels also moved the band, which in the past few years had been off-camera, back onto the main stage. Saturday Night News reverted back to its original title, Weekend Update. Michaels also planned to restore the show’s satirical edge. In an interview with the Los Angeles Times’ Clarke Taylor, Michaels said he anticipated the show would deal with some serious social and political subjects, such as President Ronald Reagan’s policies of the last five years, along with some questioning of current American values.
Putting the “live” back into Saturday Night Live was another priority for Michaels, who, without pointing fingers, was quite candid about how the show suffered during the past few seasons because they relied far too much on prerecorded material. Prior to the debut of season 11, Michaels explained in a Los Angeles Times interview with Morgan Gendel why the show was no longer faithful to his original vision: “The illusion we created—which is true—is that from 11:30 when it starts till 1 o’clock this thing is happening in New York. As it got into more prerecorded tapes and got more into videos, it lost what is magic about it. I think ‘Saturday Night Live’ is about a contact with another group of humans coming through this tube. . . . It became a television show. There’s nothing wrong with it being a television show, but I think it was something more.”
As for the new cast, Michaels took a few chances and, in the process, broke some new ground. The most conventional choices were the three cast members—Nora Dunn, Jon Lovitz, and Dennis Miller—who had a background in improvisation and/or stand-up comedy. Dunn and Lovitz stayed for five seasons, while Miller remained for six, during which he anchored Weekend Update. The remaining cast members, all of whom lasted one season, were unconventional by comparison:
• Seventeen-year-old Anthony Michael Hall, the youngest cast member in the show’s history, played Chevy Chase’s son in National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983) and a geeky teenager in three John Hughes films—Sixteen Candles (1984), The Breakfast Club (1985), and Weird Science (1985).
• Twenty-year-old Robert Downey Jr., son of filmmaker Robert Downey and nephew of SNL writer Jim Downey, was another young actor who appeared alongside Hall in Weird Science and in other supporting film roles.
• Danitra Vance, an actress who performed with Second City in Chicago and off-Broadway, was the first female African American repertory cast member.
• Terry Sweeney, a comedian and stage actor who was on the SNL writing staff during season 6, was the first (and so far only) openly gay male cast member.
• Randy Quaid, a film actor who had appeared in over twenty-five made-for-TV movies and films, earned an Academy Award nomination in 1975 for The Last Detail.
• Joan Cusack, a trained actress from Chicago, had a background in improvisation with some film credits (including Sixteen Candles).
Their combined lack of television and sketch comedy experience certainly posed a problem for the show’s producers. In a 2008 interview with Terry Keefe, Anthony Michael Hall described the environment at SNL as “very competitive” and “cutthroat.” “I think the people who found the most success came from a stand-up background where they had their own material,” he added, “and they had a competitive nature.”
When producer Lorne Michaels returned to the show in 1985, he assembled a new cast comprised mostly of character actors: (front row, from left to right) Nora Dunn, Danitra Vance, Anthony Michael Hall, Terry Sweeney, and Jon Lovitz, and (back row, from left to right) Randy Quaid, Robert Downey Jr., and Joan Cusack.
Season 11: A Work in Progress
First-time host Madonna Louise Ciccone was chosen to kick off the 11th season on November 9, 1985. At the time, the Material Girl’s star was on the rise after the success of her second studio album, Like a Virgin (1984), and subsequent tour, and her indie comedy Desperately Seeking Susan (1985). She made headlines with the publication of nude photos, taken back in 1978, in the September 1985 issues of Penthouse and Playboy. There was also the media frenzy surrounding her wedding to actor Sean Penn in Malibu on August 15, 1985 (her twenty-seventh birthday). The latter was parodied in her monologue. Madonna, who didn’t take herself so seriously back then, narrates fake home movies of her wedding, which is interrupted by a windstorm created by the swarm of helicopters.
The remaining sketches were the usual mixed bag: an overlong Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf? parody in which the president (Randy Quaid) and Nancy Reagan (Terry Sweeney) host Prince Charles (Jon Lovitz) and Princess Diana (Madonna) for a nightcap; Madonna as Marika, the star of a cheesy Spanish-language variety show; and an episode of National Inquirer Theatre that suggests John and Bobby Kennedy (Anthony Michael Hall and Randy Quaid) murdered Marilyn Monroe (Madonna), which some critics and viewers found offensive. Washington Post staff writer John Carmody reported the NBC switchboard in New York logged 140 complaints about the sketch.
Michaels kept his promise and did include some social commentary in the mix. What at first appeared to be a slick parody of a beer commercial celebrating the yuppie lifestyle of its drinkers turns out to be a message from Almighty God about where their self-indulgence and materialism are leading them: “Where you’re going, you’re going to pay. . . . Yes, you’re going to hell!” But the edgiest sketch addressed the paranoia in Hollywood surrounding the AIDS crisis and the “pinklisting” of gay actors who were forced back into the closet.
When Rock Hudson appeared with his former costar Doris Day at a press conference to launch her new television cable show, it was clear he was sick. His publicist later confirmed that he did have AIDS. The actor died at his home on October 2, 1985, about a month before the Season 11 opener aired. Hudson’s last acting gig was a recurring role on Dynasty as Daniel Reece, a horse breeder who falls in love with Krystle Carrington (Linda Evans). On February 6, 1985, Hudson and Evans shared an on-screen kiss. Once the truth about Hudson’s condition was exposed, the press had a field day, suggesting that Hudson may have transmitted AIDS to Evans, despite the fact there was no evidence that HIV can be transmitted through casual contact. In August 1985, Los Angeles Times TV critic Howard Rosenberg criticized KABC, the Orange County Register, and Knight-Ridder of fueling the hysteria surrounding AIDS with their “hysterical reporting” of what was essentially a nonstory.
SNL satirized the hysteria in a sketch that begins with an opening crawl explaining that like the blacklisting of Communists in the 1950s, Hollywood is once again “gripped by paranoia, this time provoked by the tragic AIDS outbreak. Actresses refuse to do romantic scenes with unknown actors. Gay actors are forced back into the closet, leading double lives, wearing wedding bands, riding motorcycles—living in fear that they will fall victim to Pinklisting.” In the sketch, Madonna plays Melinda Zoomont, a temperamental television actress who initially refuses to do a love scene with her new costar, Clint Weston (Terry Sweeney), a closeted actor who tries to act like a hetero. His secret is out when a studio light falls and he lets out a girlish scream, but that’s okay because it turns out the director and everyone else working on the film is gay. But when Melinda comes out as an intravenous drug user, Clint refuses to kiss her. Although the irony of the twist at the end seems to have been lost on the studio audience, the sketch was bold and broke new ground because no other comedy program was even close to touching the subject of AIDS and the homophobia the disease was generating (the first made-for-TV movie about AIDS, An Early Frost, aired two nights later). Unfortunately, the satire on SNL did not consistently tackle such controversial subject matter, and when it did, it was not so direct, nor did it always take a clear position.
The season 11 opener posted the highest ratings the show had in years (9.5 with a 28 share). The first three shows averaged 8.8 with a 25 share, significantly higher than last season’s average of 7.4 with a 22 share. As Leslie Bennetts pointed out in a critical piece on the show for the New York Times in December 1985, these numbers still pale in comparison to the show’s highest season average of 13.6 with a 38 share in 1979–1980 (season 5).
The season opener also received terrible reviews. Los Angeles Times critic Howard Rosenberg wrote that the new show “is for people who get their kicks tearing wings off flies. . . . This was comedy the way Hiroshima was comedy.” He was not amused by the Marilyn Monroe–Kennedy sketch: “Bobby was there, and so was Jack, who murdered her by putting a pillow over her face. I mean, you just can’t get any funnier than that.” The Associated Press’s Fred Rothenberg accused the show of violating “the first and only rule for political satire: It didn’t make it funny.” This was especially true of the Monroe-Kennedy sketch. Unfortunately, the backlash didn’t end with episode 11.1. As in season 6, the press continued to criticize the show along with reporting on the morale problem plaguing the cast and the writers behind-the-scenes.
Michaels appeared to take it all in stride, characterizing the reaction of the critics to the season opener as “extreme.” He explained to Bennetts that the show did not get great reviews when it debuted in back in 1975 and for the next five years the phrase “Saturday Night Dead” was used repeatedly by critics. He also waxed philosophical about the show’s relevancy in the 1980s. Saturday Night Live “came of age as an expression of the counterculture movement,” but rather than appeal exclusively to the same audience that watched in the 1970s, he decided to “redefine it as an ’80s show and let a new generation create it in its own image.” Michaels was aware that the comic sensibility had changed and this might not sit well with fans of the show who had been watching since the beginning. He said, “It’s still evolving, but it’s different, and I think we’re getting better as we shake down.”
One individual who did not make Michaels’s job any easier was Michael O’Donoghue, who was hired as a writer and grew frustrated because he couldn’t get any of his material on the air. In that same December 12 New York Times article, O’Donoghue, who was on the NBC payroll at the time, told Bennetts the show was an “embarrassment.” “It’s like watching old men die,” he said, “It’s sad, sluggish, old, witless and very disturbing. It lacks intelligence and it lacks heart, and if I were grading it I’d have to give it an F.” In a Rolling Stone article published at the end of season 11, Susan Orlean reported that O’Donoghue was fired one last time a few hours after the New York Times article appeared in print.
The President’s Son Dances (11.9)
Twenty-seven-year-old Ronald Prescott Reagan, the son of President Ronald and First Lady Nancy Reagan, is the first and only member of a “First Family” to appear on SNL. A former member of the Joffrey Ballet’s junior corps, Ron got a chance to show America some of his dance moves in the show’s cold opening, which begins with Ron on the phone with his parents (Randy Quaid and Terry Sweeney, in drag, as Nancy), who are away at Camp David. They remind him that being in charge of the White House while they are away is a big responsibility. He promises to behave. We then hear the first few bars of Bob Seger’s “Old Time Rock and Roll,” and, like Tom Cruise in Risky Business (1983), Ron, wearing a pink button-down shirt, white briefs, and Ray-Ban sunglasses, starts dancing, jumping around, and playing air guitar to the music. For the son of the current president, and a conservative one at that, it was a bold move. But Ron, who at the time was pursuing a career as a journalist, which would eventually lead to his current gig as a Seattle-based radio show host, was never politically on the same page as his parents.
Two days after it aired, the Associated Press reported the president and First Lady’s response to their son’s performance (apparently 11:30 p.m. is past their bedtime, so they watched a copy on VHS the following evening). Assistant White House press secretary Mark Weinberg released a statement from the Reagans: “We always knew Ron was a good writer, and we were delightfully surprised to see what a good performer he is.” When asked by the press at a news conference for his reaction, President Reagan said he was “very surprised” and “Well, you know, like father, like son.” What he meant by “surprised” is certainly open for interpretation. When asked the same question, Nancy Reagan said she was not embarrassed by his performance, adding, “I guess that’s what they did in the picture [Risky Business].” There was, of course, no mention that Nancy was being played by a gay man in drag. In Shales and Miller’s Live from New York, Sweeney said Ron shared with him that his mother “did not care” for his impression of her, “but he thought it was eerily accurate.”
Quaid and Sweeney were back in another funny but clunky sketch, a parody of Back to the Future (1985) in which Ronald and Nancy Reagan are poor Democrats. Doc Brown (Jon Lovitz) invents a time machine (it’s actually a blender) that transports son Ron back to the set of Hellcats of the Navy (1957), where his parents met and fell in love. Like the plot of the film, young Ron is forced to get his parents together by convincing his father, a Democrat, he should be a Republican, which is a total turn-on for Nancy. One can only imagine the looks on the faces of the president and First Lady while they were watching that sketch.
A Wayans Brother Swishes (11.12)
Comedian Damon Wayans was apparently less than pleased with the limited roles he was getting in sketches, and he made it known by breaking one of Lorne Michaels’s cardinal rules—no ad-libbing on the air. In this sketch, Jon Lovitz plays “Mr. Monopoly,” who arrives at the police station to help his client (guest host Griffin Dunne) who has been arrested. There’s a series of Monopoly-related jokes about real estate, free parking, and getting out of jail free.
The two policemen who arrested Dunne are played by Randy Quaid and Damon Wayans. When the show went live, Wayans decided to play the cop as a flamboyant gay man (as he would often do on In Living Color [1990–1994]). It made no sense because it had absolutely nothing to do with the rest of the sketch, leaving his fellow actors and the audience very confused.
In recounting the story in Shales and Miller’s Live from New York, Wayans admitted, “I was angry, I basically wanted them to fire me. I wanted to quit, but I thought they would sue me.” Michaels did fire Wayans and then, in an odd turn of events, invited him back for the season finale (11.18) to perform stand-up. Wayans would return one more time in 1985 (20.17) to host the show.
The story of Wayans’s firing in the middle of the season, which was an SNL first for Michaels, has been told many times in books and interviews. The one point that no one seems to address, as it apparently was not perceived as a problem, was the fact that at the height of the AIDS crisis he was portraying a gay cop in such an offensive manner to get laughs, particularly when it had absolutely nothing to do with the sketch. In a 1992 Playboy interview, Michaels described Wayans’s “caricature gay voice” as a “funny voice, but it was completely inappropriate for the scene.” How about it was just completely inappropriate—period.
Cast Members Are Burned Alive (11.18)
The cohosts for the season finale were Angelica Huston and former New York Yankees manager Billy Martin (don’t look for a connection—there isn’t any). Martin was once again fired in 1985 after an altercation with one of his pitchers, Ed Whitson, in a hotel bar in Baltimore. During a sketch at the end of the show, Martin pretends to be drunk, forcing Michaels to fire him on the air. A bitter Martin gets revenge by setting the cast on fire, though Michaels manages to save the season’s star player, Jon Lovitz, before the room is engulfed in flames. This parody of a prime-time cliff-hanger, popularized in the 1980s by shows like Dynasty and Dallas, ends with two questions: “Who Will Survive? Who Will Perish? Tune in October 11th.” There’s also a question mark at the end of every name as the credits roll (Lorne Michaels? Al Franken? Tom Davis? etc.) The cast members whose fate was sealed that night were Joan Cusack, Robert Downey Jr., Al Franken, Anthony Michael Hall, Randy Quaid, Terry Sweeney, Don Novello, and Danitra Vance. One factor that sealed their fate was that, unlike two of the surviving cast members, Nora Dunn and Jon Lovitz, none of them created any strong breakout characters (or, to be fair, were given the chance). During season 11, Nora Dunn’s model-turned-talk show host Pat Stevens made eight appearances, while Jon Lovitz made multiple appearances as Tommy Flanagan (11), Master Thespian (6), and Mephistopheles (3). The third survivor, Dennis Miller, was popular anchoring Weekend Update.
So what exactly went wrong with season 11? That’s the question Susan Orlean posed in her June 1986 Rolling Stone article. Producer Al Franken suggested there was not “one walloping problem” with the show that could account for its “humble ratings, hostile reviews, and hardly any of the cachet that it enjoyed in the past.” Among the many reasons he cites are competition with cable television and the video rental boom, a shortage of comedic talent because “great young comedians are being gobbled up by movies and other television shows,” and the rise of neoconservatism that has politically splintered America’s youth, who are the show’s core audience. “And it doesn’t help,” Franken joked, “when we do bad shows.” Orlean added another reason to the list: the tension between Franken and Davis (the producers) and the writers, who complained about the cast, who, in turn, complained about the writers.
In a 1993 interview with Spin magazine editor Bob Guccione Jr., Michaels reflected back on the 1985–1986 season, which he said was “very difficult” because everything had to be replaced from the previous season. “You find yourself going with what you think would be safe because the new thing hasn’t emerged,” Michaels explained, “And then you come on the air and realize it’s not what you want it to be, and you get beat up in the press . . . By the end of ’85, I was able to see: Wait a minute, we need . . . we don’t have enough of this.” Michaels’s solution was to bring in “two or three performers who could balance what I already had” and “a couple of writers who were better writers for them.” Joining the three cast members who survived last season’s cliff-hanger—Nora Dunn, Jon Lovitz, and Dennis Miller—were Jan Hooks, Dana Carvey, Phil Hartman, Kevin Nealon, and Victoria Jackson. Compared to the previous 1984–1985 cast, they were all seasoned comedy performers with more television experience. More importantly, they specialized in “character comedy,” meaning most of them excelled at playing a range of characters. Jackson was the one exception. Her characters were mostly variations of her dumb blonde persona. Michaels also hired writers who could write for them, like Terry and Bonnie Turner and Conan O’Brien, who joined the staff in 1987.
For the first time in SNL history, all eight cast members would remain on the show for four seasons (with Mike Myers added as a feature player in 1988–1989 and then bumped up to a regular cast member the following season).
Seasons 12–15: Staying in Character
Madonna, who headlined the underwhelming season 11 opener, appeared on-screen at the start of season 12 to deliver a message: “As you may remember, one year ago tonight I hosted the premiere episode of Saturday Night Live. Therefore, NBC has asked me to read the following statement, concerning last year’s entire season. Ready? [Reading from a piece of paper] ‘It was all a dream, a horrible, horrible dream.’ And now, to confuse you even further, ‘Live from New York—It’s Saturday Night!’” The idea that all of last season was a dream was based on a cheesy stunt the producers of the popular prime-time soap opera Dallas (1978–1991) played to get actor Patrick Duffy back on the series. In the season 9 cliff-hanger and season 10 opener, Pam Ewing (Victoria Principal) sees her late husband, Bobby Ewing (Patrick Duffy), come out of the shower. Bobby was struck by a car and died at the end of season 8. Pam realizes that everything that had happened on the show since Bobby’s death (in other words, all of season 9!) was a dream.
Asking the audience to forget about SNL’s season 11 like a bad dream doesn’t seem quite fair because it’s asking us to forget about the creative contributions made by the talented cast members like Joan Cusack, Randy Quaid, Terry Sweeney, and Danitra Vance. Season 11 wasn’t perfect, but it certainly wasn’t the worst. Compare it to season 6 and you’ll see.
There were some early signs that the so-called nightmare had ended with the introduction of several new characters early on in season 12, who were soon be joined by some carry-overs from season 11 by returning cast members Nora Dunn and Jon Lovitz, and later additions from Mike Myers when he joined the cast in 1989. While some of the characters were one-note, season 11 marked the return to character-driven comedy.
Memorable Moments, Characters, and Sketches
Dana Carvey as the Church Lady
Her name is Enid Strict, but she refers to herself as “the Church Lady.” In an interview with Ryan Murphy for the Washington Post, Dana Carvey explained that the Church Lady was originally a schoolteacher who was condescending to little kids. His mother told him the character reminded her of the ladies at their church who made her feel inferior when she brought a casserole to potluck dinners and turned their heads when the Carvey family walked into church after missing a few Sundays. The Church Lady debuted on Carvey’s first episode of SNL (12.1), but he felt like his recognition factor “went through the roof” when he sang a duet of “You Don’t Bring Me Flowers” with guest Willie Nelson (12.12).
Dana Carvey and the Church Lady both made their SNL debut in the season 12 opener.
Then there was her interview with ex-PTL Club leader evangelist Jim Bakker (Phil Hartman) and his wife, Tammy Faye (Jan Hooks) (12.15). She prefaced it by assuring the couple that they can just relax “because on my show no one is going to mention adultery, blackmail, missing funds, drug induced psychosis, or getting booted from the PTL. So, what else is going on?”
The holier-than-thou Church Lady had no difficulty booking guests for her show because there were plenty of scandals in the late 1980s to make her feel superior. She usually prefaced an interview by stating that she was not going to judge her guests, but allow them to tell their story. But she enjoyed bringing up the sordid details and liked to “break down” what may have happened in those fifteen minutes spent in a cheap motel room. Between 1996 and 2000, the Church Lady judged and scolded Jessica Hahn (Jan Hooks) (13.6), Jimmy Swaggart (Phil Hartman) (13.13), Donald Trump (Phil Hartman) and Marla Maples (Jan Hooks) (15.14), Leona Helmsley (Jan Hooks) (15.9), Saddam Hussein (Phil Hartman) (16.7). O. J. Simpson (Tim Meadows) (22.4), and Madonna (Molly Shannon) (22.4). Several guest hosts, like Sean Penn (13.2) and Rob Lowe (15.15), were brave enough to discuss their bad behavior. When Carvey hosted the show in 2011 (36.14), the Church Lady had a few choice words for Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi (Bobby Moynihan) and the Kardashian sisters—Kourtney (Vanessa Bayer), Khloé (Abby Elliott), and Kim (Nasim Pedrad). She ended each episode by cueing her organist Pearl and doing the “superior dance.”
The Church Lady will also be remembered for an assortment of catchphrases, like “Isn’t that special?,” “Now who could it be? Could it be . . . Satan?,” and “How conveeeenient!”
Nora Dunn and Jan Hooks as the Sweeney Sisters
Liz (Nora Dunn) and Candy (Jan Hooks) Sweeney, better known as the Sweeney Sisters, made their SNL debut as guests on Instant Coffee with Bill Smith (their original names were Franny [Hooks] and Mary Ann [Dunn]). They are a “lounge act” with limited talent, so they never get to play the “big room” (the closest they come is a ski lodge lounge (13.8) and a hotel lobby [14.15], where, in their final SNL appearance, the duo are joined by their older sister Audrey [Mary Tyler Moore]). Wearing tacky pastel gowns, they hit the stage and sing a medley of songs tailored for their audience with lots of patter and corny jokes in between. They entertain the residents of the Baycrest Jewish Retirement Home with traditional Jewish songs and selections from Fiddler on the Roof. They celebrate the Chinese New Year in a Chinese restaurant with songs about the Far East (like “Tea for Two” and “Have an Egg Roll, Mr. Goldstone”). At the Brookfield Zoo Banquet, which is a benefit for the Primate House Renovations, they break into “Yes! We Have No Bananas” and “The Lion Sleeps Tonight.” The highlight of their SNL appearance is when they spot Paul Simon in the audience at the ski lodge and serenade him with a medley of his hits—“50 Ways to Leave Your Lover,” “Mrs. Robinson,” “The 59th Street Bridge Song (Feeling Groovy).” But to hear the Sweeney Sisters sing (or rather, try to sing) “Bridge over Troubled Water” was worth the price of admission.
Liz and Candy Sweeney (13.13) (Jan Hooks, left, and Nora Dunn) butcher some holiday standards at their annual Christmas party (12.8).
Dana Carvey and Kevin Nealon as Hans and Franz
Arnold Schwarzenegger was the inspiration for this pair of Austrian bodybuilders who had their own show, Pumping Up with Hans and Franz (a cut-out of Schwarzenegger appeared in the background of the set). “We’re going to pump you up” was their catchphrase, but the irony is they never actually did anything to help viewers get into shape. They spent their time showing off their muscles and insulting viewers for being weak and “girlie men.” When the real Schwarzenegger appeared on their show, he called them the same thing.
The irony of the term “girlie men,” which one can only assume is the opposite of a “he-man” or a “man’s man,” was lost when Schwarzenegger began to use it publicly, beginning with the 1988 presidential election. While campaigning for George H. W. Bush, Schwarzenegger said of his opponents, “They all look like a bunch of girlie men, right?” As governor of California he used the term in a 2004 speech to mock his opponents in the California Legislature: “They cannot have the guts to come out in front of you and say, ‘I don’t represent you. I want to represent those special interests: the unions, the trial lawyers.’ . . . I call them girlie men. They should get back to the table and finish the budget.” He also encouraged voters to “terminate” his opponents at the polls in the upcoming election.
There was talk of turning Hans and Franz into a feature film, but the project (thankfully) never materialized.
Jon Lovitz as Master Thespian, Mephistopheles, and Tommy Flanagan
Lovitz’s specialty was over-the-top characters—“big talkers” with inflated egos who commanded your attention when they walked into the room.
• Tommy Flanagan: America’s favorite pathological liar popularized the catchphrase “That’s the ticket!” (see chapter 21).
• Master Thespian: “Another page from the diary of the world’s greatest actor!”
His real name is Jonathon Yankonvichi, and, in his own mind, he is the greatest actor of all time, which is why he prefers to be called by his stage name—Master Thespian! Onstage and off-stage he is a major ham with a penchant for overacting, exaggerating every word and gesture. He attributes everything he says and does to his talent (“Acting!” “Genius!” he constantly cries, raising his hand in the air, as if ready to take a bow).
Too bad Master Thespian’s greatness (and talent) is all in his head. He drives a Hollywood director (host Robin Williams) crazy when he can’t remember his single line (12.5) and his costar (host Jerry Hall) in a film he’s directing can’t stand him. When he’s “cast” by W. H. Macy (Phil Hartman) as Macy’s Santa (13.8), he doesn’t seem to understand the role that Santa likes children and the store doesn’t give children whatever they want for free.
• Mephistopheles: Wearing his signature red cape and horns and carrying a pitchfork, Mephistopheles, a.k.a. the Devil, shows up in some of the most unexpected places. He’s the defendant in a case on The People’s Court when Vonda Braithwaite (host Rosanna Arquette), a beautician who tries to nullify a contract she made with the devil in exchange for success in her hairdressing business (12.3). He also pays the Church Lady (Dana Carvey) a visit in her home on Christmas Eve (14.9) and cheers up Andrew Dice Clay (15.19), who is depressed over all of the negative publicity surrounding his invitation to host the show.
• Tonto: Three popular fictional characters—Tonto (Lovitz), Tarzan (Kevin Nealon), and Frankenstein (Phil Hartman)—all of whom have limited command of the English language first appeared as guests on a talk show, Succinctly Speaking (13.8), hosted by Kathleen Fulmer (Nora Dunn), who asks each of them their opinion on such topics as “Bread” and “Fire” (Tarzan and Tonto say, “Fire good,” but Frankenstein says, “Fire bad.”). The third topic is the 1987 Intermediate-Range Nuclear Forces (INF) Treaty, signed by President Reagan and General Secretary Mikhail Gorbachev on December 8, 1987, which eliminated the United States’ and USSR’s nuclear and conventional ground-launched ballistic and cruise missiles with intermediate ranges. Just as the entire sketch makes no sense to the audience, the question is lost on Frankenstein. In a rare moment on the show, Phil Hartman breaks character and begins to crack up. “Fire bad,” is his only response as he gets up from his chair and crashes through the back of the set.
The trio returned for As World Turn, a soap opera parody in which Frankenstein has an affair with Tarzan’s Jane (Victoria Jackson) (14.11) and, in another episode, has an evil twin played by Mel Gibson (14.16). They also have their own classic Thanksgiving special, Thanksgiving Good, Fire Bad (15.6), and appear onscreen together around various holidays to wish us Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Season’s Greetings.
Masterbrain (12.6)
Most of the Reagan White House sketches back in season 7 painted the president as an old fool who lacks the intellect and the mental capacity to run the country. This brilliant sketch, written by Jim Downey and Al Franken, begins with Reagan (Phil Hartman) being interviewed about Iran-Contra, claiming he had no knowledge of the operation. Once the reporter leaves, it’s revealed that Reagan’s doddering old man persona is all an act. He is not only the man in charge, he’s the only one who knows what’s going on (he also speaks Arabic and German fluently and quotes the French political thinker Montesquieu [“Power without knowledge is power lost!”]). Reagan calls his staffers into his office and rapidly starts barking orders, telling CIA Director William Casey (Jon Lovitz) that he’s in charge of his new operation to fund the Contras, and Chief of Staff Don Regan that he’s going to have to resign. He keeps getting interrupted—first for a photo op with a girl scout and then by his old friend from Hollywood Jimmy Stewart (Dana Carvey), whom he brushes off so he can get back to plotting the cover-up and the next part of his plan. After seeing so many impersonations of Reagan as a clueless old man, the reversal comes as a complete shock. The satirical sketch is not only brilliantly written, but it’s perfectly staged in the theatrical farce tradition with characters constantly entering and exiting like a scene out of a Marx Brothers film.
William Shatner at a Star Trek Convention (12.8)
Some thought it was a case of biting the hand that feeds you, but Trekkies and non-Trekkies alike no doubt found some truth in this hilarious sketch by Bob Odenkirk and Judd Apatow. In his monologue, host William Shatner expresses his amazement at the influence Star Trek has had worldwide. “All the Trekkies and Trekkettes and the Trek-kores . . . they’re truly incredible,” he adds, “and I hope they have a sense of humor about this show tonight or I’m in deep trouble.” Shatner then gives us a glimpse into what it’s like at a Star Trek convention, where we see an assortment of Trekkies assembled around a podium waiting to hear from Captain Kirk himself. He takes questions from the audience that are essentially minutiae about the show (like what was the combination you used to open a safe in episode 25). At one point, Shatner stops and tells them all to “Get a life, will you people? I mean, for crying out loud, it’s just a TV show! . . . You’ve turned an enjoyable little job, that I did as a lark for a few years, into a colossal waste of time.” At the end of his tirade, Shatner and the emcee exchange words, prompting Shatner to return to the microphone and say that his speech was a “re-creation” of the Evil Captain from episode 37. The Trekkies applaud.
The sketch was a brave move on the part of Shatner considering that Star Trek was the highlight of his career and Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home was currently playing in theaters (by then it was already cleaning up at the box office). At the same time, there were no doubt some Trekkies tuning in to SNL that night just to see Captain Kirk who were less than pleased with his message to his fans.
“It’s just a TV show, damn it!”: William Shatner (Star Trek’s Captain Kirk) lashes out at Trekkies at their annual convention (12.8).
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Introducing Dieter and Sprockets (14.17)
Dieter (Mike Myers), host of a West German television show from Berlin, Sprockets, made his first public appearance on the stage in Second City in Toronto before moving to television. Myers and his collaborator, actor Dana Anderson, appeared together on the Canadian summer series It’s Only Rock ’n’ Roll (1987) as Kurt and Dieter, a German avant-garde musical duo. During their interview, where they are joined by their pet monkey that they love to touch, they show clips from their 1977 music video, “Kunst Und Zeitgeist” [“Art and Zeitgeist”] (you can watch the segment on YouTube under the title “Kurt & Dieter”). Another one of Myers’s characters, Wayne Campbell, also debuted on It’s Only Rock ’n’ Roll.
Myers brought the character to SNL and gave him his own talk show, Sprockets, which focuses on German and American art and kultur. Wearing all black and round wire-rimmed glasses, Dieter welcomes an odd assortment of guest like actor Butch Patrick, who played Eddie Munster (Ben Stiller) (14.17); art critic Heike Mueller (Nora Dunn) (14.20), who is also his lover; and actor James Stewart (Dana Carvey) (15.1), who is there to plug his new book of poems. Dieter also hosts a German dating game show, Love Werks, where bachelor Wolfie Schreiber (Jason Priestley) chooses a she-male named Susan (Phil Hartman) who was recently released from prison (17.13). Dieter bores easily and often interrupts his guests to tell them, “Your story has become tiresome.” Like Myers’s other characters, Dieter’s banter is peppered with many catchphrases like “Would you like to touch my monkey?” and “Now is the time on Sprockets when we dance!”
In 1998, Mike Myers made a $20 million deal with Universal Pictures to turn Sprockets into a film. Myers, who was not pleased with his own script, wanted to delay the filming, stating, “I cannot, in good conscience, accept $20 million and cheat moviegoers who pay their hard-earned money for my work by making a movie with an unacceptable script.” Universal sued Myers, who countersued. The case was settled out of court, and Myers agreed to appear in another Universal film as the title character in Dr. Seuss’s The Cat in the Hat (2003).
Steve Martin Pays Tribute to Gilda Radner (14.20)
On May 20, 1989, the final episode of the fourteenth season (14.20), an emotional Steve Martin honored the memory of Gilda Radner, who died that day at the age of forty-two after a long battle with ovarian cancer. Without mentioning her name, Martin stated, “[T]he thing that keeps bringing you back is the people you get to work with . . . and I would like to show you something we recorded on this stage in 1978.” In the sketch, entitled “Dancing in the Dark,” Martin is sitting at a bar; Radner is at a table with two friends. Their eyes meet, and everyone else freezes as we hear “Dancing in the Dark,” the song Fred Astaire and Cyd Charisse danced to in the park in the MGM musical The Band Wagon (1953). He stands up, takes her hand, and the two engage in a choreographed dance (by Patricia Birch) that is both graceful and comical, with Martin occasionally doing one of his signature “happy feet” moves.
“You know, when I look at that tape,” Martin concludes, “I can’t help but think how great she was, and how young I looked. Gilda, we miss you.”
On SNL’s fifteenth anniversary special, Jane Curtin and Laraine Newman also paid tribute to their former costar with clips of some of her best moments.
Saturday Night Live: 15th Anniversary Show (9/24/89)
On Sunday, September 24, 1989, Saturday Night Live celebrated its fifteenth anniversary in style with a two-hour prime-time special. It’s a star-studded black-tie affair with an audience of VIPs and former hosts. Past and current cast members and past hosts including Charlton Heston, Steve Martin, Mary Tyler Moore, O. J. Simpson, and Robin Williams. In addition to the tribute to Gilda Radner, John Belushi’s “little brothers” Dan Aykroyd and Jim Belushi honor John’s memory with some of his best moments. In their introduction, they take a jab, without mentioning any names, at Bob Woodward, author of the 1984 Belushi biography Wired: The Short Life and Fast Times of John Belushi, which focused primarily on the comedian’s drug use.
A stellar cast whose members stayed with the show for five to nine years: (front row, left to right) Dennis Miller, Nora Dunn, Jan Hooks, Dana Carvey, Jon Lovitz, and (back row, left to right) Victoria Jackson, Kevin Nealon, Phil Hartman, and A. Whitney Brown.
One cast member who was a no-show was Eddie Murphy, though his entourage showed up (and they are billed in the opening credits as “Eddie Murphy’s Entourage”). They appear onstage with Mary Tyler Moore, who introduces past sketches that were in questionable taste.
Wayne’s World Welcomes Aerosmith (15.13)
Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers) and Garth Algar (Dana Carvey)—the most excellent hosts of Wayne’s World—welcome their idols Aerosmith to Wayne’s World thanks to Garth’s cousin, Barry (Tom Hanks), a roadie for the band. While interviewing Barry, Wayne checks the upstairs camera and discovers Aerosmith is sitting in his breakfast nook talking to his mother (Nora Dunn), who then takes them on a tour of the house. The band eventually made it downstairs and Wayne asks them three questions: 1) Is it true you don’t do drugs and alcohol any more? Answer: Yes. 2) (To Steven Tyler) Are those your real lips? Answer: Yes. 3) With the recent developments in Eastern Europe, do you think Communism is on the decline, or is this just a temporary setback? Tyler and his bandmate Tom Hamilton disagree on this one. The segment ends with Wayne fulfilling his dream of playing with Aerosmith. Together, they play and sing the Wayne’s World theme song.
Wayne’s World, which airs on Cable 10, a community access channel in Aurora, Illinois, has two excellent hosts, Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers, left) and his best friend, Garth Algar (Dana Carvey).