One Month Later
TANNER had never been so nervous in his life. He was pacing, his heart was racing, and he couldn’t draw in enough air to fill his lungs. What the hell did he think he was doing? What was he trying to prove?
“You look scared as hell,” a voice said from behind him.
Tanner looked over his shoulder, wondering who was getting in his space when he was trying to prepare. Then he realized who was standing with his hands shoved into his jean pockets, watching him.
“Well, if it isn’t the old man,” Tanner teased. “Ryder goddamn King. You’re lucky you weren’t mobbed coming back here.”
Ryder was grinning as he strode over, hand outstretched. “Couldn’t miss the chance to see a good comeback,” he said, clasping Tanner’s hand and slapping his back at the same time. “They’re calling you the second-chance cowboy.”
Tanner stared at Ryder. “You’re fucking with me.”
“Nope. There’s even some cute-as-hell college age girls out there with a sparkly sign stating exactly that. I kid you not.”
Tanner’s chest tightened again and he flexed his wrist, grimacing. He knew he shouldn’t be competing if he didn’t feel right, but hell, half the guys out there were bandaged up to their eyeballs. He wasn’t ready to give up the sport he loved, and if he didn’t get back into it now, he wasn’t sure he ever would.
“You’re all healed up, or that wrist still giving you hell?” Ryder asked.
It was one thing lying to his family and dodging their questions, but when a former pro like Ryder King asked the question, knowing exactly what it felt like to be staring down the barrel of a ride like he was? Lying wasn’t an option.
“It’s—I don’t even know how to describe it—it feels sticky in the joint,” Tanner said, flexing it again and making a fist. “I don’t have full strength there like I used to.”
Ryder looked around. “You got a bag with tape in it? I can strap it up for you, get it good and tight, and you can powder and glue up.”
Tanner jogged over to his bag, pleased with how easily he was able to move now. The wrist was the only thing left still bothering him.
Ryder studied his wrist, feeling it and turning it over, before putting the tape between his teeth and pulling it out.
“I’ll do it nice and tight, but you know you’re only asking for trouble if you keep at it without healing properly first, right?”
“Yeah, I know.” Tanner listened to the roar of the crowd, knew the clock was counting down until his ride and he needed to get ready. His head was all over the place and he needed to sort his shit out before he stepped anywhere near that damn bull.
“You’re on that mean bastard Thunder Cat again today, aren’t you?”
Tanner had been seeing that damn bull in his sleep and it was driving him crazy. “That’s the one.” He’d been mighty unlucky to draw him again so soon.
“He’s just a bull, no different than any other out there. Don’t overthink it, and get the hell away from him when you come off.”
Tanner met Ryder’s gaze. Ryder had been the best bull rider around in his day, and he appreciated the pep talk.
“And then come find me for a beer afterward,” Ryder said.
“So we can commiserate?” Tanner asked with a laugh.
“No, so I can tell you that the best part of being a bull rider is retiring, you fool.” Ryder tipped his hat and pointed toward the action. “Quit while the going is good, that’s my advice. Now get out there and have the ride of your goddamn life.”
“You’re serious?”
“Deadly.” The set of Ryder’s face told him he wasn’t kidding around. “I’m no saint, but being home with my girl and being on the other side of the ring is a damn sight more enjoyable. Once you give up the adrenaline rush, anyway.”
Tanner blocked out what Ryder was saying, not wanting to even hear the word “retirement” with the battle he was facing. And when he walked toward the chute, the roar of the crowd in his ears as they cheered for whatever poor bastard was riding for his life in the ring, everything disappeared from his head. He climbed up and looked down, hearing the heavy, snorting breath of the bull that had almost killed him.
Thunder Cat looked up, throwing his head, and Tanner caught his eye.
“Time for second chances,” he murmured, waiting for his name to be called, clapping powder between his hands, before slowly easing himself down onto fifteen hundred pounds of mad, wild flesh.
The accident flashed through his mind; the stabbing pain; the bite of torn flesh; the searing, vomit-inducing crack that still echoed through him whenever he thought about that day. And that goddamn bull spinning around and staring at him before goring him on his way past.
Go away, he ordered.
“And next up we have former PBR grand champion and one of the highest-earning bull riders of all time, Tannnnnn-er Ford!”
Tanner sucked back a breath, his lungs on fire as he eased down. His legs were shaking until they were against the bull, fingers tight through the rigging as he settled in, ready for the fight of his life. His body was feeling good, his pulse was racing, and he was as pumped as he’d ever been—it took him back to his first ride when he’d believed he was invincible and couldn’t wait to climb aboard a big goddamn bull and show the crowd watching exactly what he was made of. He’d hated the Ford tag when he was growing up, and bull riding had been his way to prove to the world that he could make it on his own, that he was stronger, tougher, and more talented than anyone gave him credit for. And to show his family that as much as he liked his trust fund and the perks that came with being part of the Ford dynasty, he didn’t need family money in order to survive. To thrive.
The signal went and the chute opened, and all Tanner could hear was the huff and puff of the wild-as-hell beast beneath him. He spun and whipped around, bucking wildly, and Tanner counted in his mind, ready to scream as he held on like he’d never held before. His body was flung back and forth and he dug his fingers tighter, refused to loosen his grip, refused to let the bull get the better of him a second time. He could do this—this was his comeback, and no one, not even this son-of-a-bitch bull was going to take his moment away from him.
Eight. The last buck sent him flying, but he’d done it! Tanner flew through the air and landed roughly on his feet, stumbling as he tried to correct himself. The clown was doing his job, but Tanner looked back and saw him charging, knew the bull wanted to smash him into the ground and gouge him all over again if he was given half a chance.
Tanner was hauled back and he leapt up, scrambling up the wooden side fence and tucking his boots up high.
Fuck you, Thunder Cat, he thought, watching the sleek black bull charge around the arena as the crowd went crazy. You didn’t get me today, and you won’t get a goddamn chance to get me again, either.
Tanner inhaled the familiar rodeo smell, absorbed the addictive feeling of being in the arena with thousands of fans screaming and clapping and watching the sport they loved. He flexed his hand and experienced the familiar, jolting pain. It wasn’t bad most of the time, but he could sure as hell feel it right now after the stress he’d just put his entire body through.
He might love being a bull rider, but Ryder was right. The best thing for a guy his age, after so many years at the top, was bowing out on a high. He had never wanted to accept defeat before, but it was time to retire. And it was no one’s decision but his own, and that’s why it finally felt like the right thing to do. When he’d been asked before what else he had left to prove, it had rubbed him up the wrong way fast, but faced with his father’s mortality and what he’d decided he wanted from the future? It was time.
Before he climbed down on the other side, Tanner waved to the crowd and fist-pumped the air. The announcer was running through his ride, hyping up how well he’d done, and Tanner hoped he’d done well enough to win. If this was his last ride, it had better have been enough to beat the young riders who’d been chasing his tail for the last couple of years. He’d always loved seeing the new up-and-comers, the way they didn’t give a shit and believed they’d bounce when they hit the ground. Hell, they probably did bounce the first few times, their bodies more lithe and unbreakable than the older guys on the circuit, but only the odd one ever climbed the ranks and managed to succeed big time. But it was time to move aside and let someone else take his place, and he was ready to cheer them on instead of gritting his teeth and competing alongside them.
Bull riding had been his everything, but he’d had a change of heart, and if he’d learned anything over the years, it was that following his heart, not his head, was always the better decision.
* * *
“Dad?” Tanner called the second he’d pushed the big oak front door open at River Ranch. “Dad?” he repeated, kicking his boots off and heading into his father office. He wasn’t there. He heard the faint sound of a television down the hall and smiled. His father was definitely home.
“Hey, Dad,” he called out, not wanting to startle his old man.
“Tanner? Aren’t you supposed to be riding a bull?”
He laughed. “I rode him already.”
“And instead of having a night out you decided to come back home? How did you even get back here so fast?”
Tanner poured them both a drink, whiskey on ice, and passed one glass to his father as he sat on the chair opposite him. His father took it and reached for the remote, turning the TV off and facing him. He’d been single-minded about getting home as fast as he could, and now he was here, exhaustion was starting to gnaw at him and his ankle and wrist were killing him, so it was a relief to be sitting with his legs stretched out. He was also hoping the drink would numb the pain and discomfort a little.
Tanner held up his glass and leaned in to clink it against his father’s, before taking a small sip. The familiar burn in his throat put him at ease as he sat back.
“What are we drinking to, son?”
“My retirement,” Tanner replied, not missing a beat and surprising himself how quickly the words came out.
“Your retirement?” Walter repeated.
“I’ve been thinking about it a lot, ever since your diagnosis, and the timing feels right. It’s been a long time coming and it’s taken me awhile to get my head around it, but I’m ready.”
He watched as his father took another sip, shaking his head as a smile slowly spread across his lips. “You know my treatment was successful, don’t you? I might not be around as long as I’d like to be, but I’m not dying. You’re not getting rid of me that fast!”
Tanner held up his drink again. “To your health,” he said. “And you’d better stick around for a while yet, because I’m planning on doing my MBA first before joining the family business. Thought I’d better add some letters to my name to make me sound more legit.”
Walter grinned. “Well, damn, I’ll drink to that!”
Tanner slowly sipped his drink, feeling like a weight had lifted from his shoulders that’d been pushing him down for weeks. He’d made the right decision, and it had never been so clear as right now.
“What’re you watching?” he asked.
Walter picked up the remote again and tossed it to him. “Nothing much. Find us a movie or something decent to watch, would you?”
Tanner couldn’t remember ever sitting in his father’s den and watching a movie with him, hell, he couldn’t remember spending a Saturday night in with him period, but it was nice. He laughed to himself as he flicked channels. Maybe he was finally growing the hell up.
* * *
Lauren sat at her parents’ dinner table, smiling as her father finished pouring the champagne for his girls, and lifted her glass high. She loved nights like these. Her sister’s family, her mom and dad, all gathered together eating great food and drinking something equally as good—it was her perfect kind of night.
“When does work start to get busy for you?” her father asked. “Do you have time for a game of golf with your old man?”
Lauren and Hannah exchanged glances, like they had when they were girls and their father had suggested something deadly boring or had forgotten what they liked and didn’t like to do.
“Sure thing, Dad,” she said. “But how about we just go for a hike instead?”
“Patience, my love, patience,” he said in his dad voice. “Once you stop rushing and start enjoying the game, you’ll learn to love it.”
“Seriously, being a mom doesn’t give you an automatic card to get out of golfing,” Lauren hissed to her sister.
“Oh, Lauren was just telling me the other day that she was starting to love the games with you. Perhaps you should do a few extra holes next time?” Hannah said.
Lauren kicked her sister under the table, ready to kill her. She loved spending time with her dad, she did, but golf? She took a gulp of champagne to commiserate.
“What courses are you enjoying?” Fred, Hannah’s husband, asked.
Lauren turned to Hannah and was about to chastise her when there was a knock at the door. Her mother looked as surprised as she was that someone had come by to visit.
“You expecting anyone?” she asked her mom.
“No, not tonight. Would you mind seeing who it is?”
“If it’s someone wanting money or selling something, tell them to take a hike!” her father said. “Unless it’s a neighborhood kid. I always give them a few dollars if they’re fundraising.”
Lauren got up, drink in hand, to answer the door, smiling at her dad. She bet he always bought the kids’ fundraiser chocolate bars in particular—he had a mighty sweet tooth that her mother was always trying to discourage. She pushed aside a big silver balloon that was in the doorway she had to pass through, with HAPPY WEDDING ANNIVERSARY emblazoned across it. Her parents had been married forty years to the day, and they’d been having a wonderful time looking at their old wedding photos and listening to stories about their early years together.
There was a soft knocking again as Lauren reached for the door handle. “I’m coming,” she called out.
She yanked the door open and her glass almost slipped straight through her fingers. Tanner was standing there, wearing slim-fitting dark jeans, a dress shirt with the top collar undone, and a tailored jacket. Compared to the clothes she was used to seeing him in, he looked like he was heading somewhere special.
“Hi,” he said.
“Hi,” she repeated, not sure what else to say.
“I’m sorry to intrude, I know it’s a special night for your folks, but would you mind if I came in?” His smile was sweet but she could tell that he was nervous, and she had no idea why he’d turned up at her parents’ house.
“How do you know it’s their anniversary?” she asked, still standing in the doorway, trying to decide whether to let him in or try to convince him to go back to his car. The last time they’d seen each other hadn’t exactly gone well.
“Your sister posted it on Facebook,” he said. “I took a shot that they lived in the same house, and that you’d all be here celebrating since it was a Saturday night. I remember how much your folks preferred to stay in rather than dine out.”
Lauren should have told him that they’d just sat down to dinner and were in the middle of toasting their marriage, so now wasn’t a good time, but instead she stood back and waved her hand into the house. She didn’t know what she had to lose and it was probably easier having him come in than walking him back to his car and having to be alone with the man. “Come on in then, I guess.”
Tanner stepped in and looked around, waiting for her and touching the small of her back to let her go first. He was a true Texan, his manners faultless when he was on his best behavior—only right now she wished he wasn’t. It was like his eyes were burning into her from behind, and her body was tingling from his touch, still craving what it had been denied.
“Cute photos,” he said as they walked past framed pictures of her and her sister as toddlers.
“You’d have seen them before if you’d ever bothered to come in when we were dating,” she pointed out. “I recall your preference was to sit outside lounging on your motorcycle, smoking a cigarette that you’d eventually drop and grind beneath your boot in my dad’s driveway—which drove him nuts by the way. And I’d be inside begging to go out with you.” She spun around. “You know, I’m pretty sure he still hasn’t forgiven you for all that stuff, so don’t go expecting Mr. Nice Guy, okay?”
Tanner groaned. “Okay, well, let’s not mention any of that tonight. It’s been a long time and I bet he’s forgotten at least half of the shit I put him and your mom through.”
She had no idea why he was even in her family home, but something told her this was no casual drive-by. He looked so handsome all dressed up—she was used to seeing him in his work clothes, which consisted of a simple rotation of plaid shirts and jeans, or his vacation attire, so either he was going somewhere after this or … she was puzzled. Would he dress up like that just to come here? His hair was combed back off his face, still too long on the ends but it suited him, and she saw that his boots were polished, too. For some reason he’d made a big effort with his presentation and attire. Some reason that was starting to make her uneasy, whatever it was.
“Ah, Mom, Dad,” Lauren said, as a hush fell over the room and every face at the table turned to Tanner. “We have a visitor.”
“Mr. and Mrs. Lewis,” Tanner said in a loud, clear voice. Something wasn’t right, she still had no idea why he was here or what was going on, but her anxiety was starting to build. Big time. He looked like he was about to ask her to prom.
She saw the shock register on every face, but it was her sister who frantically looked back at her, searching her face, dying to know if Lauren had known he was coming. Lauren shook her head ever so slightly and mouthed no, and her sister nodded, understanding in only the way a sister could.
“Tanner,” her father finally said, pushing out his chair and coming around the table to shake his hand. “It’s been a long time. Good to see you.”
Was it? Her dad had never been happy to see him before and she’d been so certain that wouldn’t have changed. Ever. Why would he feel differently now, or was he just being polite because Tanner was a man now and he was technically a guest in their home?
“Happy anniversary, sir,” Tanner said as he clasped her father’s hand back. “I hear congratulations are in order. Forty years is no mean feat.”
Her father had already downed a couple of drinks—they all had—so if there was ever a time for Tanner to get away with turning up at their house unannounced, it was probably now. She was surprised by how relaxed her dad’s body language seemed to be.
“I read that you were competing yesterday,” her father said. “Sounds like you had a good ride, is that the right terminology?”
Tanner laughed. “Yes and yes, it was a good ride. Climbing back on the beast that had thrown me and done its best to kill me took nerves of steel, I can tell you that. But I’m sore today, damn sore!”
“I didn’t know you’d been following Tanner’s bull-riding career,” Lauren said, trying to hide her shock.
“You’d be surprised what I know, sweetheart.”
Clearly she would be. After he’d as good as marched Tanner out of her life, she hadn’t expected her dad to have given him a second thought. But to find out that he’d been following him?
“Mr. Lewis, I know I’ve interrupted your evening so I won’t take long, but I wanted to show you that the boy you knew, back when I was dating your daughter, well, he’s all grown up now.” Tanner cleared his throat. “I understand now why you asked Lauren to end things with me, because to be honest, if I was a girl’s dad, I’d have been holding a shotgun and marching me the hell away, too. I was a bad influence on her and I needed to grow the hell up before I had any right to be laying claim to her.”
Lauren tried to stop her jaw from falling open as she looked from her father to Tanner. Surely this wasn’t actually happening? Did Tanner come here looking for forgiveness? Why the hell would he even care what her father thought of him now that he was a grown-ass man? And what was this talk about laying claim to her? Any other time she’d have jumped up to defend her rights as a woman, but right now she was too shocked to say anything. And curious—she was deeply, painfully curious to know why this conversation was even taking place.
Her father made some weird hand gesture, shaking it like he was clearing the air. “Tanner, the past is in the past, and to be honest, maybe I was a little hard on you.”
Tanner grinned. “Seriously? Because with all respect, I think you were probably right about me.”
They both laughed, and Lauren went to sit beside her sister, legs shaking as nerves set in. It was like she was in a dream, watching what was going on without actually being a part of it. She felt like she was back in high school.
“Sir, the reason I’m here,” Tanner said, looking more serious, his face more somber now, “is to ask for permission to date your daughter, with the intention of making an honest woman of her one day. I’ve gone about this all wrong in the past, but this is me trying to do the right thing so you know my intentions right from the outset.”
“Holy shit,” Lauren murmured, her hand quivering as she reached for her glass of champagne. She slowly, quietly polished off the rest of it, not setting her glass back down until every last drop had been consumed.
Hannah suddenly had a hold of her other hand but Lauren couldn’t look at her. Her skin was on fire, her body was still shaking, her tongue wouldn’t move. She couldn’t have gotten a word out even if she wanted to. Why was this conversation going on as if she wasn’t even in the room?
“Tanner, maybe we were wrong to break you up, but we only did what we thought was right at the time.” Her father turned, and Lauren watched as he exchanged glances with her mom. “I’m done telling my daughter what to do though. If you want permission, then you’ll have to ask Lauren. It’s hers to give, not mine.”
Her father, Tanner, her mom, her sister, and Fred all turned to look at her. Lauren balled her fists and dug her nails into her palms.
“Lauren?” Tanner asked, and suddenly as his gaze warmed her, it was like they were the only two people in the room. She stared back at him, wishing she knew what to say, wishing she wasn’t so terrified of what she didn’t know, of having her heart broken.
“I…” she murmured, so genuinely lost for words.
Tanner came closer and dropped to one knee in front of her, taking one of her hands and holding it in his. “I’m sorry for the way I behaved, but if there’s one thing I’ve realized, it’s that I can’t let you slip through my fingers again. I’m so, so sorry I hurt you.”
“I honestly don’t know,” she whispered. “I’m sorry, I…”
“Tanner, why don’t you join us for the evening?” her mother said, taking the attention from her. Lauren would be eternally grateful and hoped she remembered to thank her later. “There’s plenty of food and we have another bottle of champagne waiting to be opened.”
Tanner smiled in response, but it was her answer he seemed to be waiting for.
“Lauren?” he murmured. “I’ll walk straight back out that door and leave you to your evening if you want me to, you just say the word.”
“Stay,” she croaked, before summoning all her courage and reaching out, hesitantly, to touch his cheek. “Please stay.” She couldn’t answer his questions or figure out how she felt or what she wanted, all she knew was that she didn’t want him walking out that door and away from her right now. Maybe ever.
Tanner leaned a little closer and Lauren’s heart skipped a beat, waiting for him to kiss her, expecting it. But instead he pulled back and took her other hand, pulling her to her feet. He was definitely on his best behavior, trying to impress her parents.
* * *
Tanner sat at the table, beside Lauren and across from her father. It was a strange feeling. All these years of blaming Lauren for ending things, and suddenly he could see so clearly why she’d done it, and he could see why her parents hadn’t wanted him near their daughter. Hell, he’d have probably sent his daughter to a university on the other side of the world if he had any say in the matter, so the fact her father had sternly told her to call things off probably wasn’t a bad call.
But he was here now, and he wasn’t about to let Lauren just disappear from his life again, not now when he could prove why he deserved her.
He noticed Lauren’s glass was empty and reached for the bottle of champagne, refilling her glass. Her hand came to rest on his thigh, so lightly he might not have even felt it if he hadn’t seen the movement.
“It’s nice to have you here,” she whispered as her head dropped to his shoulder.
Tanner’s body stiffened, but he let it go, forcing his shoulders to relax as he took in a big breath. His natural reaction was to rebuff this kind of thing in public, he was so used to not having a girlfriend or being close to anyone, but this was the intimacy he’d craved for so long. With the woman he’d been craving.
“I can’t believe I was allowed in the house,” he murmured to her, kissing her head affectionately and stroking a hand through her long hair. “I’m thinking I’m not as hated as I thought.”
“So Tanner, tell us about your comeback,” her father said. “You’ve had one hell of a career to date.”
He kept an arm around Lauren, thumb brushing her shoulder as he smiled over at her dad. This was nice. This was a close-knit family who’d invited him into their embrace, and it struck him why Lauren had been so adamant that she wouldn’t be in a relationship that they didn’t approve of. Her family were kind, decent human beings, and they clearly all loved one another very much; he wouldn’t give up family gatherings and relationships like this for anyone either. Her mom was so kind and full of smiles, despite the past, and he smiled straight back at her when she made eye contact, clearly happy enough to have him seated at her table.
“My first ride back was on the bull who tried to end me, but I’ve been thinking a lot about second chances lately, and I think that helped to get me in the right head space.”
“And my gorgeous sister managed to get your body back in tip-top shape, I’m guessing?” Hannah asked.
Tanner laughed and squeezed Lauren’s shoulder. “She sure did. I’m betting she’s one of the most valuable assets on the Rangers,” he said. “Am I wrong?”
They all had a laugh, and Tanner pushed his knife and fork together on the plate after taking his last mouthful of dinner.
“You are a wonderful cook, Mrs. Ford.”
She swatted the air at him. “Honey, it’s about time you called me Julie. You’re not that naughty boy any longer, so no more need for formalities.”
“I try my best not to be,” he joked. “And I truly am sorry for what I put y’all through back then. I might ride bulls for a living, but other than that I’m a pretty straight up kind of guy.”
“Well, that’s good to hear, but I have to confess I didn’t cook a thing. Lauren and her sister ran down to my favorite Italian restaurant and ordered the lot as a treat.”
“Well, it was still good, whoever made it. It’s been a great night.”
“Do you want to help me clear the table?” Lauren asked, rising beside him.
“Sure.” Tanner filled his hands with plates and stood back to let Lauren go first. Her brother-in-law had disappeared to put the kids down, letting the girls have a good catch-up at the table, and Tanner wondered how he’d get on trying to wrangle kids. Bulls were one thing, but kids? He wasn’t so sure about that.
He set the dishes down at the same moment as Lauren, and she stepped in close to him, shoulder to shoulder. He heard her big inhale and when he turned to her, she did the same, her cheek against his chest, her arms around his back. Tanner held her tight, not saying a word, just enjoying the feel of her in his arms, her warm, slender body wrapped so firmly to his. When she finally looked up, her head tilted back and her deep brown eyes locked on his, he slowly kissed her, taking his time, wanting her to know how much he loved her.
“I can’t believe what you did tonight,” she said, pushing back as she smiled up at him. “You’ve got balls, I’ll say that.”
“I wanted your parents to know that I cared for you enough to man the hell up,” he told her. “It was time I started behaving like a man instead of the boy who didn’t know how lucky he was to have you.”
She sucked in her bottom lip and he knew she wanted to say something, and she was trying to figure out how to say it.
“What is it?” he asked. “Whatever it is, I don’t want there to be secrets anymore.”
“Did you mean what you said about making an honest woman of me? Does that mean what I think it means?”
He dropped another kiss to her lips and brushed her hair from her face. “I lied when I told you I didn’t want anything more a fling,” he confessed, forcing himself to open up. It was now or never and he wasn’t about to ruin his one shot at being real with her. “I’ve only ever wanted you, Lauren. It just took me awhile to get my head around, I don’t know, my own shit I guess. I was still hurting from something that had happened so long ago.”
“I never stopped loving you,” she said, holding him tight. “But is that enough for this to work? I mean, one of us has to give something up or we’ll never see each other, and I don’t even know if I can give you what you want.”
He stared down at her. What he wanted? “I want you, it’s as simple as that,” he said. “What is there that you couldn’t give me?” He saw tears well in her eyes and raised his hand immediately to brush them away. “Hey, why are you crying?”
She sighed and shut her eyes, but a tear escaped from the corner and ran slowly down her cheek. “You said at the ranch that you wanted a brood of children, and I used to want that too, but I don’t even know if I can have kids now.”
He wrapped his arms around her tight, pulling her to him and wanting to keep her safely cocooned against his chest forever to protect her. She looked so sad, full of so much hurt, and he’d have done or said anything to soothe her.
“I’m not here because I want your babies, Lauren. I’m here because you’re the one for me, and I don’t want to waste another day pretending I don’t love you.”
Shit, the word had slipped out. It was the first time in his life he’d said the L-word and he could feel the change in Lauren, the way her breathing became shallow and her hands stopped moving against his back.
She didn’t say it back to him, but she didn’t need to. The fact that she was giving him a chance right now was enough. More than enough.
“So you don’t mind? If we can’t fill your ranch with children?” she asked. “Hand on your heart it isn’t a deal breaker? Or the fact that I’m working eighty-hour weeks during the season?”
“Sweetheart, I’ll take however much you’re willing to give me. I promise that’ll be enough,” he said honestly. “And trust me, I think Mia will be filling the ranch with enough kids all on her own. Maybe we can just be the awesome aunt and uncle, which will mean me getting a whole lot more time alone with you anyway.”
“I have endometriosis,” she said quietly. “I would love kids one day, but it might make things tough, or maybe even impossible. I want you to know that I’d want them if I could though.”
He grinned down at her. “Whatever you want, baby.” Tanner said as he rocked his hips forward, kissing her when she leaned into him. “Whatever you want.”
“Huh-hmm,” Lauren’s father made a noise in his throat to announce himself.
Tanner pulled his lips from Lauren’s and looked sideways, jumping back when he saw her dad standing in the entrance to the kitchen.
“Hands off my daughter,” he said with a laugh. “It’d be embarrassing to have to throw a grown man out my front door for getting frisky with my youngest girl.”
Tanner gave her dad a salute and took a step back. “Speaking of your girl, would it be rude to steal her away before dessert?” Her dad shrugged and pointed to his daughter, making it clear that the decision was hers to make, not his. “There’s somewhere I’d like to take you, if you don’t mind skipping out of here early.”
Lauren looked curious and nodded, giving her dad a quick kiss on the cheek before taking Tanner’s hand, their palm and fingers intertwined.
“Where we going, cowboy?”
He winked and brought her hand up to his to kiss. “You’ll have to wait and see.”