Chapter 12   

Tara finished packing her new collection of dresses and shoes then had second thoughts. Should she just leave it all behind? She had to go, and he had to stay. Maybe one day she’d need them for a trousseau, but not likely, not with her heart crushed to crumbs. She could always sell the clothes if she needed money for feed in a pinch. The question settled, she called for a footman to load her baggage in the carriage. “I’ll be leaving for the train station immediately.”

“Yes, miss.” He picked up the heavy trunk. “I’ll be back for the rest in a moment.”

She stood at the window, taking in the view for the last time. So beautiful, the welcoming courtyard. So deceiving. Tara lifted her chin and stiffened her back. She belonged back at her own ranch in Montana, not here. Not at a fancy ball. Not where she lost sight of herself, succumbing to the poor and judgmental treatment of others. But should she at least say goodbye?

Instead, she chose to write a thank-you note addressed formally to Countess Higgenbottom expressing appreciation for her stay in the beautiful suite. This room gave her some grand ideas for improvements on the JBarF. Her home could do with a sprucing up. Not nearly as grand as all this, but some fluffy covers on a new mattress, a little paint in a cheery yellow would be lovely, and practical updates in general. She could take home good from this experience. See, Pa? I found the positive side.

Her mind steeled to focus on the future she could control, Tara gathered the small valise and a wrap she’d need for the long ride home. She would say a quick farewell to Timothy. He deserved more than a note. She owed him her blessing on his future, even if he should marry the ever-so-perfect Miss Thea Thompson. Tara nearly missed the top stair at the thought of Timothy married to the silly girl she’d met at the first dinner party. She clutched at the balustrade and steadied herself before taking the next step.

She found Timothy in the breakfast room absently eating while reading, completely unaware of what was about to happen.

He looked up from the newspaper. “Green suits you.” He stood and offered her a chair. “It’s very becoming.”

Meaning to simply say goodbye and flee, she faltered. He wanted to be with her. She couldn’t let him. As he bent to kiss her cheek, she blurted out, “Timothy, stay in Kentucky. Your home is here, where you’re used to the comforts and have your family.” She couldn’t look at him. “You’ll have a better life with prospects of a more”—the last two words came out in a whisper—“suitable wife.”

He touched her cheek, turning her to face him. “I thought we’d put all this nonsense away.”

“It doesn’t matter.” She fought against the deep sadness gripping her chest. “We both know this won’t work.”

“No, we don’t know it won’t work. We agreed we would work.” His face darkened. “I’ve never known you to go back on your word.”

“I have to do this for both of us.” His mother’s words clanged in her heart.

He lifted her hand and held it between both of his. “I love you, Tara, and I want to marry you.”

“I can’t.” She focused on the buttons of his shirt. She’d capitulate if she let herself make eye contact. She tugged her hand from his. “Let me go. It’s best.” She swallowed the tears, her voice cracking as she said, “It’s what I want.”

The color drained from his face. “What do you mean, ‘it’s what you want’?”

She turned and hurried from the room, past Timothy’s mother, who was just entering.

Lady Higgenbottom swept her skirts aside, avoiding a collision. “Wait, child, I came to speak with you. I—”

“Tara!” The sound of his voice, like an injured wolf, rasped after her as she ran out the front door.

The footman, a little confused at the situation, held out a hand to help her into the carriage. “Do we drive, miss?”

“Yes. Right away, please.” She pulled her traveling skirt up after her.

“Yes, miss.” He closed her in.

She saw Timothy with his mother on the porch as the carriage rolled away. Both had deeply serious expressions. They were not her problem now.

Tara pulled her wrap tight and slid away from the window. A tear slid down her cheek as she silently prayed. God, if You really mean good for me and really love me, why have I lost everyone I love? Couldn’t You show me how all this is supposed to work out for my good?

“Are you sure she’s on board?” Timothy strained to see if Tara waited anywhere in the station. He’d thrown basic necessities and his grandmother’s heirloom ring in a rucksack slung over his shoulder. Six months ago survival subsistence was something he’d never have considered.

“I sold her the ticket. Yes, I’m sure.” The agent stamped Timothy’s ticket “Lexington to Silver Bow” when the whistle blew. “You’d better run, mister, if you’re going to catch that girl. The train’s leaving any minute.”

Grabbing the ticket from the agent’s outstretched hand, he took off. The last departure whistle blew. As he rounded the corner, the engine eased forward. He leaned into his dash, dodging those waving at their loved ones leaving. Then he caught a glimpse of Tara in the fourth passenger car. He launched himself at the steps in a daring effort. One foot dangled inches from the ground, only one thought in his head. She couldn’t leave him.

Gripping the handle on the last car, Timothy heaved himself up and aboard. The danger suddenly struck as he watched the rails and rocks speed away beneath the stairs. The brisk breeze grew into a strong wind with the velocity of the train. Exhausted, he opened the door, to the surprise of the occupants. Timothy caught his breath. He made it!

But the train jerked on the rail, sending him sprawling in the middle of his official, third try at a proposal. He looked up at Tara. “I probably could have timed that better.”

Relief flooded through Tara. God had not withheld good from her. He’d given her the desire of her heart. She laughed. “No, you were right on time.”

He rose to his knee, catching the rhythm of the moving train. “Tara Johnston, I told you once I could not live without you. I then told you I love you. Now I’m here to prove I will follow you wherever you may go, because I choose you. Will you please stop running away and marry me?”

She folded her hands around his. “I will never run away again.”

“After you left, I told my mother that she would have to stand before God and explain her behavior. I reminded her of Mary, the mother of our Savior. She did not hold a position in society and yet God chose her to bring His Son and forgiveness into the world. I told her I couldn’t be a part of a family who didn’t know how to love one another.”

“You said that?”

“I did.”

“What happened?”

He slipped onto the bench beside her. “I’ve never seen her cry before, Tara. She truly thought she had the best of intentions. But as we talked, my mother understood how some of those best intentions can blind us to what God intends for us. She realized how awful she’d been to you and how deeply she’d hurt me. Enough to drive me away permanently.”

“I think I’ve been blind to how God works in our lives too. I judged you when we first met. Then I blamed God for losing everyone in my family. Then I left instead of working through the problem with your mother.”

He stuck his hand inside the rucksack and pulled out a small wooden box. “My mother gave me this for you.” He opened it, revealing a beautiful ruby set in gold. “It’s my grandmother’s ring.”

“She accepts me?”

“She does, if you’ll forgive her.”

Tara swallowed. “I need her forgiveness. And I need God’s.” She bowed her head.

They quietly prayed together.

Tara lifted her eyes to his. “I’ll send a letter from our next stop.”

“Let’s also wire ahead to have Cookie meet us with the pastor. I’m not taking another chance with our future. I want to put this on your finger as soon as possible.” He ducked his head and touched her lips with his to the sighs of two young girls behind them.

“I’ll be sure to thank your mother for the ring.”

“Maybe invite her to visit us.” He grinned. “I think she’d be surprised to see what the ranch has to offer.”

“You mean because your mother thinks you’re marrying a pauper?”

He shrugged. “It crossed my mind.”

Two days later Cookie met them at the Silver Bow Depot, wearing new suspenders for the occasion. “Good to have you both safe home.” A very excited Peg ran around them as they loaded the luggage. He drove them straight to Pastor Chell’s church near Anaconda.

“Pastor, you’ll remember my intended, Timothy.” Tara wore the pink gown at Timothy’s request.

“Welcome home, Timothy.” The pastor extended his hand.

“Sir, please call me Tim.”

They celebrated the first wedding in the new church with the pastor’s wife and Cookie for witnesses as the clock struck high noon, Mountain Standard Time, their future before them.