Jerden’s only misgivings were that while a relationship with him might save Sara from being hassled by Nate, it could put her in danger in other ways. Seeing that Davordian woman in Nimbaza had served as a reminder that jealousy wasn’t exclusive to Rhylos. Even though nothing of the sort had ever happened on Terra Minor, a repeat of what happened to Audrey wasn’t beyond the realm of possibility. He reminded himself that the type of insanity Audrey’s murderer suffered from wasn’t common, and the fact that he was no longer available to any woman willing to pay for his services made the risk negligible. Since being designated as the Zetithian homeworld, more single women had immigrated to Terra Minor than ever before, but the odds that any of them were crazy enough to kill a Zetithian man’s mate were slim—the screening process was very strict. So strict, in fact, that if Jerden hadn’t been a Zetithian, the authorities might not have allowed him to remain on the planet.
There were exceptions to every rule—case in point, Bonnie’s first husband, who’d been a criminal with forged identity documents—but fortunately, those were rare. And even though she clearly wanted a Zetithian husband rather badly, Jerden didn’t see Salan as a potential murderess.
He looked down at Cria walking alongside the stallion. “What about you? Do you think there’s any danger?”
Cria replied with a sidelong glance that clearly said Not with me around.
“You’re probably right about that. I forgot to mention that I came with a built-in bodyguard myself. I’ll have to remember to tell her tonight.”
Tonight.
They had a lot to talk about and it might be quite late before he headed for home. After his wild, nocturnal rides through the mountains, crossing the fields from Sara’s house after dark posed no problems. However, if she were to insist that he stay the night, he wouldn’t say no.
He hadn’t been joking when he’d said he’d never leave her side. Parting with her for the few hours until dinner had taken a tremendous amount of resolve, and right now, the need to turn the horse around and gallop back to her was so strong he could barely withstand it. He hoped she wouldn’t mind if he got there a little early, because he intended to arrive before she’d even started fixing dinner.
The reason was simple.
I’ve asked Sara to be my mate, and I’m not with her.
Zetithians didn’t need a ceremony; the bond between mates was physical as well as mental and incredibly strong. Sara might not have accepted him yet, but she had acknowledged the advantages. Given the way she seemed to feel about men, the fact that she’d agreed to dinner that night and a date at some unspecified time in the future was nothing short of miraculous. He knew exactly what he was doing and welcomed the consequences. Unfortunately, it might take a while before Sara felt the same way.
She wasn’t heartless. There was plenty of love in her; she simply spread it around in other areas—horses, dogs, cats, roses, Bonnie’s children. He even suspected she was fond of Reutal, though in a completely asexual manner. Something had happened to her—whether one single, horrific episode or many—and that something had shut off her desire for men entirely. He could understand how it might happen—a series of events compelling her to form a pattern of behavior that was reinforced until it became self-perpetuating. His task would be to break that pattern and establish a new one.
He knew what he was up against. Incidents of rape, abuse—both physical and mental—domination, and cruelty were scattered throughout human history. So much so that a fear of men had become ingrained in the women and very little was required to bring it to the surface. As a member of a species whose females were among the most independent and difficult to entice in the galaxy, a Zetithian man simply couldn’t afford to do any of those things if he ever expected to find a mate. And because the scent of a woman’s desire was necessary for a Zetithian man to get an erection, rape was impossible.
It didn’t take a specialist in mental disorders to figure out that Sara was probably a rape victim, but she’d mentioned that there were other things she didn’t even like to think about.
Jerden knew he wasn’t perfect. He had flaws—arrogance being chief among them—and had been known to do some pretty stupid things in his time. He’d learned the hard way not to take a woman’s affection for granted or to assume that his sexual ability could solve any problems that might arise between them.
She’d asked him not to lie to her. No problems there—deceit was something Zetithians weren’t particularly good at anyway. She wanted her efforts to be appreciated. That was easy enough. The trick would be in doing it so subtly that it didn’t seem rehearsed. She probably wouldn’t like him to flirt openly with other women, either—yet another thing he didn’t want to do anymore. He wanted to spend time with her, discovering as much as he could about who she was, but it worked both ways. He’d have to be more forthcoming about himself. He’d promised not to hurt her, and he wouldn’t—not with words or actions. Most women liked receiving gifts as well as compliments—the more thoughtful, the better—and he’d detected a hint of relief when he’d offered to help her with the cooking.
It might take months—years, even—but he would figure out the ways in which she wanted to be loved, and in so doing, he might even discover the key to his own heart.
***
Sara wasn’t able to answer Reutal’s question regarding Jerden’s plans immediately, partly because she’d been slightly stunned by it, and partly because she just plain didn’t know the answer. “Moving in?” she echoed. “What makes you think he’s moving in?”
He turned his bulbous eyes on her and blinked. “What makes you think he’s not?”
Sara threw up her hands in surrender. “Okay. I give up. What have you heard?”
“Salan called while you were gone, wanting to know if it was really true that you and the cat were sleeping together.”
“Holy shit…”
“I told her you’d already slept with him twice.”
“You didn’t.”
“Oh, but I did. I also told her that he probably won’t ever leave you here alone again—especially after that idiot Nate was out here pounding on your door last night.”
“You heard that?”
“I have excellent hearing, although the fact that he was shouting helped. I believe I heard every bit of that conversation—his side of it, anyway—and some of yours.” Which was odd considering he hadn’t been anywhere in sight. Though relatively small, Norludian ears obviously worked better than hers did. She’d have to remember that.
“Oh, really? Mind telling me why you chose not to intervene?”
“You seemed to be doing fine without me—at least you didn’t faint this time—which is something I might’ve already told you about if you hadn’t gone tearing out of the barn this morning without fixing breakfast.”
“Sorry about that,” Sara said meekly.
“Ha! You think you’re sorry now. Wait’ll you see what a mess we left in the kitchen! But as I was about to say, what really pissed me off was him calling the cat an alien bastard and a man-whore.” Pursing his lips, he shook his head angrily. “Not nice.”
Sara chuckled. “But it’s okay if you refer to him as ‘the cat’?”
Reutal flapped his hand dismissively. “Term of endearment.”
Endearment? That sounded promising. “So, you don’t mind that I’m going to—Wait a minute. Just what is it you think I’m going to do with him, anyway?”
He threw up his hands, his eyes agog with disbelief. “What any woman does with a hot hunk like that. Sleep with him. Go out on the town with him. Hell, marry him—that is, if you have any sense at all.”
“And you’re okay with all that?” Sara had an idea that similar news involving Nate wouldn’t have met with any enthusiasm whatsoever.
“Absolutely! I like him—and you should’ve seen him riding to your rescue yesterday! Came galloping into the yard, swept you up in his arms, knocked Nate on his ass and told him to leave you the fuck alone, then carried you into the house.” He gave his lips a lascivious lick. “Totally hot, heroic stuff. Made my tongue hard just watching it—Drania even had an orgasm.”
Not wanting to hear any further details, Sara passed over these revelations with a slight gulp. “Told Nate to leave me the fuck alone, did he? Somehow I doubt that’s how he would’ve phrased it.”
Reutal blew out an exasperated breath. “Maybe those weren’t his exact words, but it’s what he should have said. My only complaint was that he didn’t hit the sonofabitch hard enough to draw blood. Aside from that, he was fuckin’ awesome.” Grinning from ear to tiny ear, he added fervently, “Good choice, Sara.”
She arched an eyebrow. “I’m so glad you approve.”
“Not that it was difficult,” he went on, blithely ignoring her sarcasm. “Choosing between Nate and Jerden is a no-brainer. Just ask Drania.”
“I don’t believe that’s necessary. She’s made that very plain.” She smiled as another thought occurred to her. “Drania’s boyfriend will be pleased that I’ve, um, eliminated that source of temptation.”
Reutal shivered with delight. “Maybe, but having the cat around will certainly liven things up—especially when you start fucking him.”
Sara nearly swallowed her tongue. Somehow she didn’t think that would happen anytime soon and couldn’t see how it would make any appreciable changes in Reutal’s life. “H-how so?”
“I’ll be able to see it in your eyes.” His own bulbous orbs gleamed with a carnal light. “We Norludians just like the idea that those around us are doing it, whether we’re getting any or not.” He smiled and patted her arm in a confiding manner. “We’re very sexual, you know.”
Sara snorted. “I hadn’t noticed.”
“You wouldn’t,” Reutal said bluntly, “because you’re not a very sexual being. I’ve noticed that about you. Watch.” He touched her hand with a sucker-tipped finger. Sara felt a subtle pull on her skin, but not much else. “If I were to do that with any other human female who was about to get all lovey-dovey with Jerden, my tongue would get so hard I wouldn’t be able to talk.” He shrugged and released the suction. “But, as you can see, it has no effect on me.” He let out a deep, regretful sigh. “So sad.” He paused as a wicked grin stole across his fishlike lips. “But the cat’s gonna change that. You wait and see if he doesn’t.”
Sara stared at him blankly. How in the world should she respond to that? Thankfully, she didn’t have to.
Reutal rubbed his hands together with greedy anticipation. “So, now that we’ve got that settled, what’s for lunch?”
Sara shook her head. “I have absolutely no idea.”
***
With Sara’s culinary imagination temporarily on hiatus, lunch wound up being leftover onpulyo soup and grilled cheese. Although the food might have been a bit boring, the conversation was not. Zatlen voiced his approval of the new liaison, Reutal snickered constantly—when he wasn’t making sexual remarks—and Drania giggled so much Sara was amazed she didn’t choke on her sandwich.
As she heated the soup, Sara recalled that she’d gotten the recipe for that traditional Davordian dish from Salan. Would Salan be a more frequent visitor if Jerden became a permanent resident? Or had she shared her last recipe? The two women had never been particularly close, but Sara hated to lose the dairymaid’s friendship, and she certainly didn’t want to make any enemies. When Jerden proposed, avoiding the advances of Salan and Nate had been the primary objective—which, now that she’d considered it more carefully, wasn’t much of a reason at all.
The funny thing was, she already missed him. Now that the gang was gathered around the lunch table, she felt his absence more acutely than she would if she’d suddenly lost an arm. In only a few days, he’d become a member of her little “family.” Reutal liked him, Drania thought he was a hunk, and though Zatlen’s reaction had been a bit more reserved, he’d voiced no objections. How had Jerden done it?
Must be a Zetithian thing, Sara decided as she took a sip of her soup. Either you really liked them or you wanted to hunt them down and exterminate them the way Rutger Grekkor had evidently done. She couldn’t imagine anyone feeling that much hatred toward an entire race, but then, she wasn’t an insanely jealous man with money to burn. Actually, the more she thought about it, the more it became clear that as things now stood, the Terran mate of a Zetithian man was in far greater danger than her husband. Audrey’s death was proof of that.
Viewed in that light, even dating a Zetithian could be potentially deadly. The longer she sat there, the more restless Sara became—a restlessness that she suspected could only be relieved by one thing. Fortunately, he was coming over for dinner.
***
Sara spent the rest of the day working with the young horses and doing her best to put the morning’s events out of her mind. However, by late afternoon, her anxiety level had reached the point that her icy hands could barely hold the reins and her gaze had darted toward the southern horizon so often her neck ached. None of the horses were going well for her, either. When she finally spotted Jerden and Danuban trotting down the hill with Cria bounding alongside them and felt herself relax, she realized why she’d been having so much trouble—particularly with Yusuf, whom she’d regrettably chosen to ride last. Horses didn’t like tense, nervous riders and her rush of relief was so intense even Yusuf heaved a sigh.
Coming to a halt, Sara didn’t bother trying to be subtle and turned toward them, her eyes drinking in the vision of man, horse, and cat. Poetry in motion, animal magnetism, nature at its finest… It didn’t matter that she’d seen this sight before—the effect was even stronger now, making her scalp tighten as a thrill swept down her neck and shoulders. Captivating, entrancing, awe-inspiring, and just plain… “Beautiful.”
Yusuf stood perfectly still and alert, a brief flick of his right ear the only evidence that he’d even heard her whisper—or felt her subsequent shiver. Like her, his attention was fixed on the approaching horse and rider.
Rather than slackening his pace, Jerden urged the stallion to pick up speed as they neared the arena. Sara’s breath caught in her throat as Jerden rocked forward, his hands fisted in the thick mane as Danuban gathered himself to soar over the fence in a perfect arc. Landing as lightly as the leopard beside them, they made a quick turn and trotted over to where she sat motionless in the saddle. The man certainly knew how to make an entrance.
Jerden grinned, displaying his fangs. “Did you miss me?”
Sara had felt her jaw drop, so she knew she was gaping at him like an idiot. “I, uh, yes, I believe I did.” She took a deep breath and glanced at the fence. “Didn’t know he was that good a jumper. Granted, that rail is a little less than a meter high, but—”
Any further comment she might have made was cut off as Jerden vaulted from the stallion’s back and proceeded to pull her off her horse and into his arms. “I missed you too, Sara.”
She had less than an instant to realize his intent before he lowered his head. Their lips touched lightly at first—only a tentative nibble on her lower lip—then, as if sensing her lack of resistance, he deepened the kiss, covering her lips with his mouth. How he kept from biting her with those sharp fangs, Sara never knew. She only knew she wasn’t afraid, and though her knees weakened, they didn’t fail her.
Not that she needed them. His muscles were hard beneath her touch as she slid an arm up to encircle his neck, yet he was so gentle; holding her in a firm, but yielding grasp. Cupping the back of her head with one hand, he curled the other around her lower back, pulling her so close she could feel his heart beating against her breast.
He was purring. Soothing vibrations emanated from his throat while his tongue swept over her lips like that of a mother cat grooming her young. Her free hand crept around his waist, returning his embrace before slipping downward to encounter the back flap of his loincloth, making her wish he hadn’t opted to dress for dinner. Thankfully, that was all he wore, giving her the opportunity to feel the play of muscles beneath the smooth skin of his back.
He was amazingly strong. She could feel the latent strength in the effortless manner in which he held her. Even if her legs were to suddenly give way, she would have remained standing. Knowing that he wouldn’t let her fall allowed her to feel safe for the first time in more years than she cared to count—totally, completely, and utterly safe… Craving more of the comfort he provided, she leaned into his warmth, returning his kiss, even parting her lips when his tongue sought entry.
There had once been a young girl named Sara who’d dreamed of a moment like this. Long ago, that girl had felt the stirrings of passion, of desire, and the need to be loved. Life’s misfortunes had caused those feelings to be shunted aside—deprived of all that might have nourished and brought them fully into flower. Their growth had been stunted, but the fact that she could allow Jerden to come this close proved they hadn’t been destroyed completely. That girl was still there, buried somewhere deep within the woman she’d become, and she still retained the roots of those emotions. All she had to do was find them.