Words have always been a problem for Rick. Take this moment, when his boss is telling him to dress up in leather and chains, grab a random stranger, and go spy on the mob in the gay BDSM club they’ve been using to launder money. You’d think it’d be easy to shoot down this insane idea with a suitably cutting response, right?
Yeah, you’d think. “You can’t. I — you’re not serious!”
Cooper fixes Rick with his darkest, most no-nonsense glare, which (as general consensus at the station holds) makes him look like an evil gnome. “Like I’m the comedian around here, Delaney. This is a simple first contact. Too hard for you, Detective? Or are you still sulking?”
Sulking? What the hell, he hasn’t been sulking! What did they expect Rick to do, dance in the streets?
But of course the words won’t come, ideas and emotion clogging in his throat and turning into nothing but individual words forced out almost at random. “You. This isn’t what, you can’t expect me to —”
“I expect you to do your job. Right now that means I expect you to scope out and infiltrate a location the Carlsburgh Clans are using for money-laundering and god know what else, keep an eye out for persons of interest, and try to get a foot in the door for further investigation. Too much to ask?”
It’s not that. It’s not the assignment at all — Rick’s done this kind of work before, lots of times.
Well. Not quite this kind of work.
Okay, fine, so Rick’s not exactly comfortable with the assignment, either. But whatever, undercover work is his specialty, and he’s good at it, and it’s not that, not really. So what if this is a little out of the usual line. Rick can deal. Seriously.
It’s that he’s expected to simply pick up and go on and pretend nothing ever happened, that he’s expected to work with someone else now, that he…
Superintendent Cooper watches him choke on words for a moment longer and then grimaces, impatience sitting on his wrinkled evil-gnome face like disgust. “Messina’s a good cop, Delaney. You need a partner, and so does he. You’re going to do this together, and you’re going to do it well. You hear me?”
Oh, Rick hears him, alright. He heard him just fine the first time. He still can’t believe his ears, though, because he does not need a partner. He already has one, so what kind of bad joke is this, anyway?
But Cooper picks up a file from the side of his desk and starts reading ostentatiously. “Report to Lieutenant Nakamura, Detective.” Meaning: dismissed.
Great.
Messina’s waiting in front of Cooper’s office, folded into one of the visitors’ chairs. Rick doesn’t slow down, just glares at the man as he strides by. He really wants to go for a run, or punch someone, or tell Cooper where to stick this assignment.
By the time Messina has unfolded and caught up with him, Rick’s already halfway down the corridor to the research and requisitions department.
“Told you he wouldn’t budge.” Yeah, fuck you too, Messina. “When I asked, he said we were the only ones suited for this assignment, and then he sniggered in this weird way and asked if I didn’t think we’d be up to it, and I thought I’d probably better not ask just what he thought qualified us in particular.”
Up to it?
That knocks Rick’s thoughts sideways. He can’t help but remember the peculiar emphasis the Superintendent had used when he’d suggested the job might be too hard for Rick. Had that been some kind of innuendo?
He grimaces and speeds his pace even further. Wondering whether or not Cooper is making dirty jokes at his expense is right up in the top twenty of Rick’s internal list of Things He Doesn’t Want to Think About, not all that far behind “going undercover in a gay BDSM club run by the mob without a partner”. Rick has never made a secret of his sexuality, but that doesn’t mean he’s okay with his boss sniggering about it.
“…anyway, it’s, uh, unexpected, but it’s alright, isn’t it?”
Rick glances over, and Messina’s smiling at him, sunny and friendly and brainless. He’s been that way — all perky and chipper — pretty much every time Rick’s clapped eyes on him so far. It’s unnatural to be that cheerful. Not to mention annoying. Maybe Rick should have narcotics set up a surprise drug test.
“The Carlsburgh Clans seem to be pushing into new business areas lately, and may be trying to expand their territory as well. By all reports the Gomorrah is an actual hang-out, so if we can establish ourselves there it’ll be a huge asset for all investigations related to organized crime. And of course, it’s really a compliment that Superintendent Cooper’s entrusting bla bla blablabla.”
Going undercover in a gay BDSM club run by the mob with Jonathan Messina. That bumps it right up to the top of Rick’s all-time hit list of Things He Tries Really Fucking Hard Not to Think About, leaving it in third place, right behind “high likelihood of dying alone and unmourned”. (And Rick’s absolutely not thinking about first place; that would be disloyal because it was only a split-second judgement call that went the wrong way. Sometimes they do, that’s inevitable, unavoidable. And if Fitz had had a glass of beer with lunch then so what.)
Rick guesses Messina’s an okay choice for this assignment on purely physical terms, what with the tall, dark and lithely muscular thing he has going on. Most people would probably say he’s handsome, too, not that Rick’s noticed.
Beyond that, Rick can’t actually judge. He hasn’t worked with Messina before. The man transferred to Carlsburgh from Chicago a couple of months back and has been working solo or as an extra with some of the others ever since. Rick hadn’t had a chance to form an opinion on him before the thing with Fitz happened. And then Rick took three weeks of paid leave, and when those were over Fitz still hadn’t been unsuspended, and one week of unpaid leave later Cooper called and told Rick that if he didn’t come back now, he shouldn’t bother coming again ever. And that had only been a few days ago.
If Cooper says Messina’s a good cop, then he’s a good cop. Cooper doesn’t make that kind of judgement lightly — Rick knows how much his approbation means. That’s not the issue. It’s just…
Damn it. Rick wishes Fitz would hurry up and get back to work.
“Bla, blabla. Lieutenant Nakamura, good morning! How’s your wife?”
Fine, as it turns out. Rick hadn’t actually needed to know how her appendectomy scar is developing, and certainly not in quite such excruciating detail, but then that’s research and requisitions specialist Nakamura for you.
Trying to interrupt or hurry the man along only prolongs the agony, as Rick knows from painful experience. Besides, Messina seems genuinely interested, nodding and making inquiring noises and silly jokes at random intervals. So Rick leans onto the counter that separates the room’s visitors’ area from equipment storage and the archives, and simply waits. If he drums his fingers on the counter while he does, well. Who can blame him?
At length, Nakamura finishes his dissertation on scar tissue, various creams, and the impact of an abdominal scar on the self-esteem and sex drive of a thirty-something woman with two kids and a cat. He bends down to reach into one of the cubicles built into his side of the counter and proceeds to arrange two meter-high stacks of fat, ring-bound volumes in front of Rick and Messina. ‘Briefings’, Nakamura style.
Nakamura then spends five minutes or so eyeing them both up and down and up again, an absolutely neutral look on his face.
Sometimes Rick thinks Nakamura makes a point of being particularly aggravating when it’s least bearable — like now. But Nakamura’s immune to not-so-subtle hints like pointed glares and raised eyebrows. Always has been.
“Well, you’re taller, and I would prefer to go with the obvious as much as possible, on this assignment,” Nakamura says at last. It’s very clear he’s talking exclusively to Messina. “I don’t think he can swing it, though.”
Now they’re both eyeing Rick up and down, making “hm” sounds and looking at each other with doubtfully scrunched-up expressions.
Nakamura doesn’t think Rick can swing it? What the hell, Rick’s standing right there!
“I’m sure he could swing it just fine, if it was necessary,” Messina says at last, with a gratingly encouraging smile at Rick. “Still, why should he have to? No need to force it! Height and other purely physical factors aren’t really important for more than a fleeting first impression, so it’s not —”
And suddenly it’s a point of pride. “I can swing any damn thing I want to, okay?”
They look at him again. Nakamura goes away and comes back with a large, deep plastic tray which he deposits on the table between the two stacks of booklets. It’s full of… clothes. In a manner of speaking.
“Here,” Nakamura says to Rick, holding out a black leather collar studded with silver spikes. “Put this on.”
Rick stares at Nakamura. Nakamura stares back. And Rick takes the damn collar.
What the hell; it’s just an undercover gig. Rick’s done this kind of thing before. Not exactly this kind of thing, with the gay BDSM bit. But close enough — there was this one nightclub where he was a waiter for a couple of weeks, which was pretty much the same kind of thing, basically. Right?
Right. All just part of the job.
He inspects the collar for a moment and then slips off his tie, stuffing it in his pocket. He has to open a couple of shirt buttons to get the collar on, but the buckle closes easily — the leather is soft with use, because Nakamura is annoyingly talkative and pedantic but damn good at his job, and never makes mistakes like handing out too-new equipment — and the collar itself is surprisingly comfortable. Pretty much like a tight tie, really.
He can so swing it. Fuck them.
Nakamura twists his mouth into a thin, humorless approximation of a smile. “Right. Now kneel down like a good little pet and cuddle up to your master, would you.”
Rick smirks at Nakamura as he kneels down and leans against Messina’s leg. Like this is such a big thing? He can be cuddly and sexy and submissive.
But when he looks up at Messina to try some smouldering (one of the women in the nightclub was famous for her smouldering), Messina’s watching him all wide-eyed and doubtful.
What?
Rick hunkers down a little more. After some thought, he also puts a hand on Messina’s calf, tries for a sweet, admiring smile and pouts a little, the way the models in magazines always do.
“Uhm,” says Messina.
“Not that your own special brand of aggressive submission isn’t entertaining, Delaney, but I’m afraid that you have flunked the test,” says Nakamura. “Nobody’s dumb enough to buy that.” Oh, fuck him and his braying laugh. He always gets way too much of a kick out of the embarrassing assignments. “I’ll be right back with the rest of the equipment. First contact’s scheduled for this Wednesday.”
“Better whip to it then, huh?”
Messina chuckles at his own joke; Nakamura rolls his eyes, but grins tolerantly. Rick just glares at them both and takes off the damn collar.