Chapter Eighteen

Tam Bellshaw said goodbye to his friend, patted the dog on the head and headed out to the main road to where he’d parked his car. Today was his first day at his new cash-in-hand job. His job title was handyman, but he knew that working for someone like Steff Black would mean more than the odd manual labour job. People knew Steff Black as a bit of a dodgy character, dangerous if you got on the wrong side of him. But he paid good money and Tam needed cash to save for a flat for him and Louise to move into, so they could get away from their poor excuses for parents. Growing up with a drunk thug for an old man and a mother who enabled his behaviour had made Tam sure that he didn’t want to be around them any longer than necessary. He’d promised Louise years ago that he’d get them out of their shitty situation, that he’d look after them both.

He hadn’t stuck in at school. Hadn’t really cared enough about it to try what with everything going on at home. All he’d really cared about was his love for boxing. He’d taken up the sport as a way to get rid of his pent-up anger against his dad. Meeting Kev through his cousin Darcie, and then being introduced to the Barrhouse Firm, had been followed by Kev and Cammy saying they’d be able to give Tam future success with boxing. But the Barrhouse Firm had put a halt to training due to Kev’s stint in prison, though Tam had never found out what he’d done. Kev had promised that as soon as he got out he’d be in touch and the Firm would get his boxing matches back on the go. But until then, he’d be skint. Now he was on the dole, signing on every Tuesday, and it wasn’t easy getting by on less than a hundred quid a fortnight. He’d met Steff in the pub a week ago, had overheard him talking to some other young lad about odd jobs needing done and heard the phrase cash-in-hand, so had offered up his services.

Now, he climbed into his old ‘S’ reg Clio, started the engine and headed to the place where Steff had asked to meet him, to go over the itinerary for his first day. The scrapyard was only a twenty-minute drive from the town where he lived, and he had enough fuel to get there. Once Steff paid him for completing the jobs, he’d be able to afford to fill the car up full and put the rest of the cash away towards a flat for him and his sister.

Pulling up at the scrapyard, he noticed that the entry gates were closed. No one was around, aside from a broad-shouldered, bald man with a crater for a face who stood at the side of the gate, arms folded across his black bomber jacket as though he was manning the door to some dodgy Glasgow strip club.

Tam rolled down the window and looked at the man, who unfolded his arms and stepped forward. Before Tam could say anything, Crater face said, ‘Tam?’

Tam nodded, a little confused as to why there would be a man standing guard at the entrance to a dump. Instead of asking, he said nothing as the man turned and opened the gates, allowing Tam to drive in.

Once through the gates, he looked in the mirror and saw them close behind him. Something sat heavy on his chest then and just as he was about to change his mind and turn the car around, Steff knocked on the window.

Tam glanced up at him and saw the smoke from the cigarette hanging out of his mouth swirl around in front of his face. He rolled down the window and nodded.

‘Park your car over there and meet me at the office. You need an induction before you can start,’ Steff said before turning and heading in the direction of a Portacabin.

Tam did as he was told and parked his car over by a large heap of scrap metal before getting out and walking towards where Steff was waiting on him. There was a coppery scent in the air, and the heaviness on his chest intensified as he reached the slightly open door of the cabin. He tapped on it gently, and Steff called him in.

‘Have a seat, Tam,’ Steff said.

Tam noted the cigarette still present between his parted lips. Steff smoked it and exhaled a cloud of smoke without removing it. Tam sat down on the seat on the opposite side of the untidy desk, and Steff stared through him. Not at him, but through him, as though he were trying to read Tam’s thoughts.

‘So, fancy yourself as a bit of a handyman, do you? A bit of this and that, aye?’

Tam didn’t know what to say, how to respond? It sounded like a challenge, rather than a question.

‘You deaf, Tam?’

‘Aye, I suppose I could turn my hand to most things if I gave it a go. Don’t mind getting my hands dirty.’ Tam cursed himself for the nausea and the beads of sweat forming on his brow.

‘Well,’ Steff said, ‘being a handyman for the likes of me means you’ll have your hands in some right sticky shit, Tam. I have two conditions for you, if you want to work for me. I need to know that the jobs you do for me will be treated with the utmost confidence. You say nothing to no one. And you do not question a job. If I call on you to do something, it’s because I think you can handle it. Once you’re in, you’re in. There’s no such thing as temporary work with me. You’re in it until you die. That’s the downside. The upside is that the money is good. Really good.’

Tam watched as Steff’s expression remained neutral. He hadn’t so much as blinked since Tam had sat down. That wasn’t the kind of statement you made to a new employee of a scrapyard. The place was clearly a front for something else.

‘Does that all sound like something you can handle, Tam?’

Tam considered the question. Maybe Steff was being a little overdramatic. You’re in it until you die? He almost laughed but thought better of it. Steff Black wasn’t the type to say something like that in humour. He knew the reputation the Black brothers held. They were dangerous men. But Tam really needed the money.

‘Aye, I can handle it.’

They were both quiet for a moment, before Steff gave him the once-over. ‘I hear you’re into the boxing? You any good?’

Tam nodded. ‘So I’m told.’ He didn’t want this guy thinking he was cocky, even though Tam cherished the fact that he was a fantastic boxer. He had a skill that came naturally, from a young age. And the fact that the Barrhouse Firm had taken a chance on him and it had paid off before Kev went away meant a lot to him. But they hadn’t been able to look after him, and there’d certainly been no money coming from them to help Tam fund his plan. Working with Steff was his only option.

‘Well, let’s just say that your boxing skills might come in useful for this job,’ Steff said. The way he stared into Tam’s eyes, intensely, made him realise that there would be more to this job than he first thought. But Tam needed the cash, so he couldn’t exactly knock back the opportunity of work.

‘Right,’ Steff started, before pulling his lips into a thin line. ‘You start now. We’ve got a disposal job. The van is ready to go. Your job is to drive it to this location.’

Steff held up his phone and showed Tam an image and address. Westlands Agricultural and Waste Management. Tam was familiar with it. The site lay on the outskirts of town, just a few miles out from the disused airport.

‘What do I do when I get there?’ Tam asked.

‘All you have to worry about is getting the van there and driving it back. No unscheduled stops. No communications with anyone, not even on your mobile. If you complete the job and there are no issues, you’ll be paid. How does a grand sound to you?’

Tam glared at Steff. Had he heard him right? A grand for driving just a few miles, no questions asked?

‘Sounds good,’ Tam replied, turning his attention to the van and wondering what was inside. A dead body most likely if he was being made to drive to the incineration factory. Get rid without trace – that’s what gangsters did, wasn’t it? Tam wasn’t stupid, he knew the likes of Steff.

‘Right, get in then,’ Steff said, throwing a set of keys in his direction.

Catching them, Tam headed for the van, got in and started the engine. The window was already down, and Steff peered through. ‘Wait here while we load up.’

Tam watched as Steff disappeared from sight and sat there in silence for a few minutes, staring out of the front windscreen, wondering what exactly was going to be loaded into the van. Then something inside of him chilled. A shuffling of feet on gravel from behind the van, a muffled cry. He glanced in the driver-side mirror and watched in horror as a person was dragged towards the back of the van, a black, canvas-like bag over their head and tied at the neck. Steff was at one side, holding him up by the arm, while another pushed him from behind. The van rocked and the screams intensified as he was put into the back.

He gripped the steering wheel and exhaled loudly. Could he back out? Steff had said that once you’re in, you’re in for life.

‘Right,’ Steff called and knocked loudly from the back. ‘Time to get moving.’

The van continued to rock but stopped suddenly. He heard a voice, not Steff’s. ‘You’ll shut the fuck up if you know what’s good for you.’

Shit, Tam thought. There really was no backing out now. Putting the van into gear, he moved slowly towards the exit where the bald man was standing.

He nodded and opened the gates, allowing Tam to drive out.

What the fuck had he got himself involved in?


Tam pulled up to the site that housed Westlands Agricultural and Waste Management, and Steff banged on the side of the van. Tam knew instantly that meant he was to stop, and he did not hesitate. He already had visions of becoming the victim if he didn’t do exactly what he was told.

Tam killed the engine and for a moment he thought his heart was going to burst out of his chest it was beating so hard. He didn’t know what to do next. Wait for Steff to give him an instruction to go? Or was he supposed to wait?

There was a long pause before the van began rocking once more, but with it came the muffled screams again. Tam focused on the watch on his wrist, watched the third hand as it moved around the face, each second feeling like an hour as the screams intensified. Whoever was under that canvas bag was resisting whatever was about to happen to him.

‘Tam,’ Steff said, suddenly appearing at the driver-side window. ‘Out. You’re needed.’

Turning, Steff moved away and Tam forced himself to get out of the van and follow him. The other two were nowhere to be seen.

He reached the entrance to the building, and Steff stood at the door, watching Tam with intent. Tam stopped and looked at the door before turning his attention to Steff. He had so many questions, but he remembered that he wasn’t supposed to ask.

‘Do you know what this place is, Tam?’ Steff asked.

‘Animal crematorium?’

‘Aye, that’s right,’ Steff replied before opening the door and gesturing for Tam to move inside first.

Tam stepped inside and looked around the vast space, before clocking the second man who’d taken the journey in the back of the van with Steff. He was standing next to a green cylindrical machine which resembled the front of an old steam train. To the right side of the large tube there was a unit which housed various buttons, and above that were various pipes surrounded by what Tam thought looked like insulation materials.

Tam turned at the sound of movement behind the machine, and he watched as another man appeared, guiding the man with the canvas bag over his head.

‘Tam?’

Tam nodded in response.

‘I’m Donnie Black. Your new boss.’

Tam frowned, turned to look at Steff, who was pulling the door to the cylinder open.

‘I expect the highest standard of confidentiality from my staff. Is that something you think you can do?’

Before Tam could answer, Steff chipped in. ‘I asked Tam this before we left the scrapyard. Tam assured me that this would be the case.’

Donnie Black pulled his lips into a thin line and nodded. ‘Good. And you know that once you’re in, that you’re in for life?’

Tam took a breath. Maybe now was the time to say that he wanted out? By the look on Donnie’s face, saying such a thing would cause Tam nothing but trouble.

‘See that machine there?’ Donnie gestured towards the machine. ‘It’s an incinerator. You know what it’s for?’

There was a moment, a second, where everything stopped. Westlands Agricultural and Waste Management.

‘Shit!’ Tam whispered.

Turning towards the machine again, he watched as Steff moved, pulled the man with the canvas bag over his head towards it and shoved him inside. The man resisted but it was no use, Steff was too strong for him.

‘This is what happens to men who don’t abide by our policies, Tam,’ Donnie said. ‘By way of initiation, you get to do the honours.’

Tam felt sick as Steff pulled the bag off the guy’s head. He locked eyes with Tam, tears pouring down his face, pleading silently with him to help.

‘What the fuck do you mean, I get to do the honours?’

‘See that button over there? You get to be the one to start the cremation process.’

Tam felt his eyes widen as he took a step back. ‘No way. I can’t do this. I’m sorry but I thought I was just going to be… well I didn’t think I’d be involved in shit like this.’

Steff grinned as he shoved the man inside and slammed the door closed before locking it tightly.

Tam couldn’t switch off from the screams coming from inside.

‘Tam, you said yourself when you met with Steff, you have no job prospects, no qualifications. I hear the Barrhouse Firm let you down after Kev’s arrest? They’ve left you hanging with no income? The only thing you have to call your own is your driving licence. We need a man like you to help us out with delivery and disposal jobs. You’re a perfect fit. This is just something that everyone has to do. It’s not like you’ve no experience with violence before, is it?’ Donnie said.

‘How do you know about the Firm?’ Tam asked.

Donnie smiled, glared at Tam through narrowed eyes.

‘I know everything about my employees, past, present and future. You think you stumbled across this job by accident? You were headhunted, pal, by yours truly. I was at your last match, looking for someone just like you. And here you are. The violence and aggression, it’s in your blood. You crave it.’

Tam shook his head. ‘No, I crave the match; I want to box. I don’t want to cremate some stranger who’s still alive.’

Donnie’s victim hammered against the inside of the incinerator, and Tam tried to block it out.

‘You could give a fatal blow in under thirty seconds. What if the man in there’ – he gestured towards the van – ‘was to be found dead with a fatal blow to the head? What if the polis were to be tipped off about that? You’d go straight to the jail, eh? Think you could handle that?’

Tam’s stomach flipped. This man was threatening him, and with no witnesses on his side Tam really had no choice. Donnie Black could murder the guy in the van, and Tam’s DNA would be all over the steering wheel. He’d have no chance.

‘That doesn’t have to happen, Tam. If you just do what I say here today, then you’ll be a free man for the rest of your days.’

Tam looked at his feet. He had no choice.

Steff appeared by his side and put his arm around him. ‘C’mon. I’ll show you how to start her up, eh?’

Tam allowed Steff to lead him to the unit next to the cylinder, all the while listening to the man inside as he pleaded not to be turned to ash.

He watched as Steff showed him how to switch the machine on, before standing back and leaving Tam to do what he was expected to do: kill another to save his freedom or spend the rest of his life in prison.

Tam did what he had to do, to protect his freedom. But he knew he’d never be able to forget the sounds of the man screaming from inside before he was incinerated.

All he’d wanted was to make enough cash to be able to get a flat for himself and Louise to live in, away from the people who’d failed in their jobs as parents. Now he had blood on his hands and a grand cash coming his way. And that was the moment Tam knew his life would never be the same again.