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Dominic lunged forward, Gwyn still gripped under his arm, his hand shooting out and grasping the spear before it could make contact with her.
The elf laughed, an eerie, tinkling sound. “We only play, monster. If we wished to spill your mate’s blood, we would have done it back in the wood. ”
“Why are you here? This isn’t one of your forests,” Dominic hissed, releasing the spear with a shove towards the elf. To the elf’s credit, he recovered in a single step, in no danger at all of toppling from the branch as Dominic had half-heartedly hoped, the spear remaining secure in that long-fingered grip.
The elf twirled the spear again so it was point down, however, and rested it against the branch almost like a human would with a walking-stick. “We’ve been following you. You are a potential danger, walking around as you are. ” The elf wrinkled his nose as though he’d smelled something foul. “We had to know that you would not be bringing trouble back to our home. The less outsiders know of us, the safer we are. ”
“Is it that, or were you just concerned about killing us inside of your wood? ” Dominic’s voice was brittle, his fingers itching to throw the knife in his grasp.
“The lovelies would know if we killed you no matter where it happened,” the elf said with a negligent shrug, now tilting his head to the opposite side. His eyes seemed riveted to Dominic’s arm, still wrapped around Gwyn. “You haven’t mated with her yet. ”
“That’s none of your concern, and neither are we. We’ve told nothing to anyone, nor do we have any intentions of doing so. Go back to your wood,” Dominic said firmly. He was wondering if he could get Gwyn behind him on the branch without her falling off, and what the best means of arranging this might be.
He didn’t like the odd look shining in the elf’s eyes as he regarded them, or the idea that he’d been following them undetected all this time...
“If I may ask, how did you leave your wood to follow us in the first place? I thought elves couldn’t do that,” Gwyn said. “Is that a myth? ”
The elf smiled suddenly. It wasn’t a pleasant smile. It reminded Dominic uncomfortably of a dog baring its teeth.
“Clever little animal you are,” the elf all but sang. “We do not claim all woods as our homes, but more than one forest belongs to us. It just so happens that the pair of you have been traveling on our land all this time. Perhaps you can understand now our caution. We expected you to return from whence you came, and instead you wasted no time in returning! ”
“So this forest is yours, but you don’t live here? ” Gwyn sounded intrigued.
Maybe she lost even more blood than I thought. She doesn’t seem to appreciate the danger we’re in at all. We could be surrounded by them right now, Dominic thought unhappily. His eyes flickered around, but he saw no one else, heard nothing else.
But if anyone could escape a half-elf’s notice, surely it was an elf.
“Correct,” the elf was saying loftily. “Too many animals hereabouts for it to be an acceptable abode. ”
“We weren’t aware we were...trespassing...but if you’ll tell us where your land ends, we’d be happy to leave it as quickly as possible,” Dominic put in tersely.
The elf’s smile disappeared as quickly as it had come. “If only that were good enough. That creature is still here. They moved her here for you. ” He jerked his head toward Gwyn. “Now they are moving her, but she is still too close. She is poison. ”
“What do you mean, she’s poison? ” Dominic asked warily. Very carefully, very slowly, he was gaining his feet, his arm still around Gwyn, pulling her up with him.
He still wasn’t sure how to get her behind him.
“That one knows,” the elf hissed, again nodding to Gwyn. “The creature’s magic is strong, and it poisons everything around her. She shouldn’t be here. ”
“Did you come here to ask us to take her with us? Getting her out of that camp would be extremely difficult now,” Gwyn said. She sounded a little out of breath, and Dominic made an effort to relax his arm a little in case he was squeezing the air out of her.
“No, it’s too late for that. ” The elf glowered at them. “They’re already moving her, we don’t know where. The lovelies say it doesn’t matter, that she can poison us from anywhere. That she is bound to our land, and land that is not ours, too, just as we are bound to our home. Just as he is bound to you. ”
“Who are these ‘lovelies’ you keep referring to? ” Dominic asked, struggling to keep hold of his patience.
“Never mind that. You would do well to listen to us and not to your animal curiosity,” the elf snapped. “So long as that creature is bound, what she is bound to will suffer when she does. And she suffers. We all feel it. Even you animals feel it, you’re just too stupid to recognize it for what it is. ”
“The heat,” Gwyn murmured.
The elf gave a stiff nod. “And more than the heat. ”
But he volunteered nothing else.
“What do you want us to do about it? Gwyn can’t heal her. She’s already had a look. ” Dominic was trying to keep his voice polite, but he was failing. He felt like he was about to crawl out of his skin with Gwyn exposed the way she was, with the elf’s eyes roving boldly over her.
As if hearing Dominic’s thoughts, the elf slowly licked his lips, still looking not at him, but at Gwyn. Heat flooded Dominic’s face, and the knuckles of the hand gripping his knife went white.
“The creature is a threat to all of us. The lovelies believe it would be unwise to kill her, lest the land die, too. But what binds her isn’t natural. It isn’t the bond of blood, as between mates, or the bond of spirit, as between the many and our home. It is a dark magic that ties her, and magic can be undone. ”
“How? ” Gwyn asked. “How can it be undone? ”
The elf shook his head, delicate furrows appearing where his eyebrows should have been. “We do not know. We do not have such magic. But we heard you speaking before of another who is bound. ”
“The High Lord,” Dominic supplied, his eyes narrowing. “We didn’t need your opinion on what to do next. It’s not your choice. ”
“On the contrary, monster. ” The elf took a sudden step forward, the spear suddenly upright again in his hands and aimed once more at Gwyn. “You are on our land. We will be escorting you off of it...and into the High Lord’s domain. We have no desire to be poisoned by strange creatures and their magic, and we cannot travel far beyond the border before our forests end. You will go to him and find out what must be done to end this before matters grow worse, or you will die, either at our hands or at those of the High Lord’s herd. That is the only choice you have. ”
“We’re being pursued by Raiders,” Gwyn protested. “We’ll never make it that far. ”
The elf snorted, his spear not wavering. “The very trees obey us, female. We are the reason they haven’t already found you. ”
“You can get us safely across the border? What about the patrols? ” Dominic was tense, every muscle poised to spring if the spear started to move again, but his mind was racing. This could be exactly the opportunity I need. Of course, I don’t know how I’d get any information back to Sebastien, but it’s a start.
The elf was already scoffing. “The patrols dare not go too far into the woods. They know nothing leaves them...unchanged. Our land does not know the borders set by animals. We can get you to the place you call Almryn. ”
“And all you want in exchange is for us to talk to the High Lord about ending this woman’s bond with Lyntara? ” Dominic was guarded, afraid to trust such an offer.
The elf’s eyes narrowed into slits. “You would do well to remember, monster, that if the land dies, it will no longer support life. Any life. Your lives are in as much danger here as ours because of what this creature has done. You serve your own interests in heeding our demand. If you do not go with us, you will die. That is the choice you must make. If you think to escape us, know you will not step a foot from this branch before we will feast on your flesh and water the lovelies with your blood. We have chosen to bear the consequences of that choice if you so push us, whatever they may be. Now it is your turn. Choose. ”
“We need a moment to discuss this,” Dominic told him, his arm tightening slightly on Gwyn.
The elf made a strange, nearly gruesome expression that resembled nothing so much as wrinkling his entire face upward, his bottom lip curling over the top and the ridges of his facial features shifting upward at the same time, but he lowered the spear and half-turned, presenting them with his shoulder. There he stood motionless, clearly intending to go no further.
Though it was a hard thing, Dominic forced himself to lower his arm from Gwyn’s midsection, and he finally did what he’d been longing to do from the moment he’d first seen the elf: he stepped around her so his back was to the elf, and he stood between the two of them. It made the back of his neck prickle to be in such a vulnerable position, and he knew it was irrational to think that Gwyn was any safer between him and the tree that would presumably heed whatever the elf told it, but he still felt some of the tension inside him relaxing now that he stood between Gwyn and the spear.
“I’m not sure what there is to discuss,” Gwyn muttered. “It seems like our ‘choice’ isn’t much of one. ”
“I needed to speak to the High Lord anyhow,” Dominic reminded her. “But I know you don’t want to go. I’ll just say it, Gwyn...even being able to cross over safely doesn’t guarantee your safety. We could very well be killed by the High Lord’s men before we ever see him. ”
“Is this really about my safety anymore? ” Gwyn sighed. “He could be lying about all this. He could have overheard us, and now he and the other elves are having some sick kind of laugh at our expense. But frankly, if there’s even a chance that he’s telling the truth and this woman really is bound to Lyntara and in trouble...it would be foolish to carry on as though it’s just about my safety, to say the least. ”
“Perhaps it would be better to get the woman in our custody and then cross the border. Who knows what could happen to her in our absence,” Dominic suggested.
“That is not your choice,” the elf spoke up. “We will go nowhere near that creature until we know what’s to be done with her. It is painful to be anywhere near her, not only for us, but for the lovelies, and you cannot hope to cross the border without our help...even were we willing to allow it. ”
The tone in his voice strongly suggested that there was no such willingness to be had.
“Truthfully, if they were so determined that I try to heal her, Dominic, I don’t think they’re going to do anything to purposefully hurt her, let alone kill her. Maybe it is better if we speak to the High Lord first and find out exactly what we’re dealing with. Assuming we can get him to speak with us at all, of course. ”
Dominic’s eyes widened as he studied her. Gwyn wasn’t looking at him, or rather, she was looking at his shoulder apparently, but her face was solemn, her amber eyes worried.
He put out his free hand meaning to turn her face to look at his, but instead he found himself caressing her soft cheek, an answering jolt of longing inside him making his fingers shake.
Now her eyes did meet his, and they were bright with tears. “What he said before,” she whispered, “about those bound being harmed when the ones they’re bound to suffer...is it that way for you? Did they hurt you, too, on that table? ”
His hand stilled. His chest felt like it was being squeezed from the inside at the look in her eyes, the unsettling recognition that she looked that way because of him.
“I...no, not literally,” he stammered.
“And if they had killed me there? ” she pressed.
Dominic had never wanted to lie so badly before in his life. He’d intended to keep just this small detail from her for as long as possible, not wanting her to feel any more trapped than she probably already did, but the word passed his lips unbidden, and no force in the mortal realm could have stopped it. “Yes. ”
She gave a slight nod of acknowledgment, her gaze unblinking, but he could see the resignation as it settled over her like a shroud, and it was worse than the pain of a hundred knives on a hundred tables.
“I never meant for this to happen. I never knew it could happen,” he insisted. His voice was rough, he didn’t sound like himself. Or perhaps he sounded like some other version of himself that had just swallowed crushed glass. “I hate that I’ve taken your choices away. ”
“Don’t. I didn’t have many to start with. You know what I am. I feel sorry for you, though, that I’m what you ended up with. ” She gave him a quavering half-smile that made the pain inside him flare.
If necromancers are treated anything like half-monsters are, I certainly understand why she would feel that way...but it’s horrible. She’s not as bad as all that. She saved my life. Dominic tried to think of something to cheer or distract her, the pain in his chest and on her face intolerable.
“Aren’t you going to ask if you’ll die when I do? ” he asked, suddenly hopeful at the memory of this one little thing that wasn’t entirely awful.
“It doesn’t really matter, does it? The odds are excellent that we’ll die at the same time no matter what. We’re going to see the High Lord, not going on a bloody picnic. ”
The laugh escaped him before he could stop it, and he snapped his mouth shut in horror, sure that the usual affronted reaction he was accustomed to receiving to his rather twisted sense of mirth would be written all over her face.
But to his surprise she smiled, a real smile that reached her cat-like eyes and made him want to reach for her again, so much so that he dropped his hand like it had just burst into flame.
“Then you’ve decided, so you can stop this disgusting attempt at courtship and start moving now, yes? ” the elf snapped, looking genuinely appalled.
“Courtship? I’m not courting anybody! ” Gwyn protested, peering around Dominic’s shoulder at the elf.
The elf did something then with his eyes that could have been rolling them. Without any discernible whites to his eyes, it was difficult to distinguish between that or some sort of spasm. “We do not argue with animals,” he said primly. “Come with us, we must not dawdle. You slept the day away. It is time to travel. ”
“If you are truly keeping the Raiders from us, I would be able to move much quicker on the ground,” Gwyn suggested hopefully.
“Fine. ” The elf sighed, looking distinctly surly. A moment later, he disappeared from view in a blur.
“I’m not sure if I should try to carry you down right now,” Dominic admitted. He both longed for and feared the feeling of her pressed against him like that again.
“You don’t have to. I should be able to climb down. ” Gwyn smiled, but he could tell it was forced.
“Let me go down first. That way I can catch you if you fall on the way down. ”
“Good idea. I can break both our necks in one go, just to spite them,” Gwyn muttered, her eyes flickering off as if searching for more elves.
He couldn’t stop himself from reaching forward to touch her face again, or his breath from hitching at the feel of her skin.
He forced his attention to her eyes. “Gwyn, I won’t let them touch you. Don’t worry about them. Just stay close to me. ”
It took everything he had to drop his hand and climb down, the omnipresent ache in his body sharpening with vehemence the moment he was out of arm’s reach of her. It’s getting worse, he thought, suppressing a grimace as he landed on his feet next to the tree. It shouldn’t hurt this much when she’s still close enough to smell. So much for the situation improving without the fever.
The elf made an impatient clicking sound with his tongue as Gwyn started to climb down. She was slow and awkward, and Dominic thought it surely couldn’t help that she was in a dress.
“Stop that,” he hissed at the elf. “Making her nervous will only slow her down more. ”
“It’s not that big of a drop,” the elf muttered, but he stopped the clicking.
Gwyn, meanwhile, forbore to comment, but Dominic could see her hands were shaking and her face was white by the time she finally managed to reach the ground.
The moment her feet touched earth, the elf was gliding off between the trees, moving much too quickly to bode well for the rest of the day. Dominic frowned at his back and turned to Gwyn, but she was already following, and he did the same, bringing up the rear where he could keep his eye on her.
No, on our surroundings, in case this is some kind of trick, he told himself sternly.
He saw no evidence of other elves as they walked—or in Gwyn’s case, almost-jogged—but he was keenly aware now of a sense of presence that he couldn’t explain. The trees had fallen oddly silent since the elf had joined them, their usual whispers taking on a muted quality, as though they were reluctant to speak in his presence even to each other, or perhaps had fallen into a respectful silence. It was difficult to tell.
The night promised to be nearly as hot as the day before had been, perhaps hotter, deepening his sense of unease.
It wasn’t long before Gwyn stopped, shaking her head and swiping an arm across her forehead. “Good gods above, I can’t keep up at this pace. You’ll have to slow down or I’ll never make it there. It’s getting too dark to see anyway. ”
The elf, who was already some distance ahead, nevertheless uttered a distinct groan.
“There’s still some water,” Dominic said. By some miracle, he still wore the haversack, and he fished out a water skin that was still partially full.
Gwyn accepted it from him, took a drink, and said to him, “If I pass out or something, you can just drag me along. Really, it’ll be fine. I heal quickly. ”
“Good to know,” the elf called.
Dominic sighed. “There will be no dragging. I’ll carry you if I have to. ”
“There’s no need, though. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. ”
“Do you honestly think I would do that? ” Dominic was teetering on the cusp of being offended.
“We would,” the elf offered, an edge in his voice.
“No, probably not. But you should when I inevitably collapse,” Gwyn mumbled, handing the water skin back to him. “At least you do it, don’t let him. ”
“You don’t seem to like him very much,” Dominic said, unimpressed by the elf’s superior hearing. “Is it because he’s forcing us to cross the border? ”
“No, it’s because he calls you a monster and me an animal. Like he’s so much better, what with his shunning of clothing and manners. ”
He wanted to laugh at how put out she looked, but wisely refrained. “Don’t be unhappy on my account. I’ve been called worse. ”
“So have I. Yet strangely, I still don’t feel much inclined to like him. ”
“If the pair of you don’t start moving, we will drag both of you. ” The elf now sounded as put out as Gwyn looked.
She rolled her eyes at Dominic then resumed walking, but he noticed she was not making even half the effort at speed that she had previously. He moved to her side, his hand going almost of its own accord to her arm to help guide her as the darkness grew.
Continuing onward, the elf seemed to realize her reduced pace when he had to retrace his steps to get in sight of them again. Once more, he groaned, but he said nothing, slowing his steps as he cast an occasional glower over his shoulder in their direction.
After some time like this, Gwyn finally asked the question he’d been waiting for on some level ever since they’d awakened. “I know why he wants us to see the High Lord. When are you going to tell me why you want to go there so badly? Do you really think he’ll help Kelemir? You’re not allies. What about the other Provinces? ”
Dominic continued to scan the trees around him as he answered quietly, “They won’t help. The lords are continually fighting with each other and with the warlords, and using the warlords to fight each other. The previous lord of the Southern Province before Sebastien went so far as to have a mage create a magical plague, of all things, in a bid to gain the upper hand. A lot of innocent people died that way before it burned itself out. The other lords of Kelemir are all lying in wait for my lord to show any weakness so they can move in and grab what they can. If they’re even aware there is trouble in Lyntara, they’re saying their prayers that the Southern Province will be harmed enough by it for them to make their move. There isn’t even outright war here yet, and already we had to contend with magefire. The consequences of Lyntara actually unraveling...who knows what would happen. ”
“So since the other Provinces won’t help, that leaves you with the Union or nothing? ”
“It appears that way. ”
Gwyn nodded her head towards their guide. He was barely a glimmer up ahead in the darkness, even to Dominic’s eyes. “It might have been safer to risk a boat to get there. ”
Dominic shuddered at the very idea. He had a bone-deep loathing for the ocean, a horrible, loud, churning mass of undrinkable water that hid gods-knew-what by way of peril.
“Perhaps,” he said reluctantly. “But the Southern Province has no navy, and a fishing boat wouldn’t exactly have been up to the task. The waters that border Kelemir are treacherous and full of rocks. Few risk them, at least as far south as my Province. ”
“What, there’s no navy at all? Don’t you think that’s dangerous? ” Gwyn peered at him, her mouth forming an “o. ” “I’m sure you know Lyntara has a fleet. ”
“I think perhaps you don’t understand the Southern Province’s position in Kelemir. We’re the tenth child in an already starving family,” Dominic said dryly. “It’s no secret that we’re a fair way behind Lyntara in many respects. Surely you’ve heard as much from the Emperor’s messengers before. We’re blocked off from everyone else and the constant battles take a toll. ”
“Yes, but...I can’t imagine a country that has no navy. What would keep Lyntara, or even another Province, from just sending a bunch of men by boat? ”
“It’s no different from any other border to us. ”
“But what about the cannons? ” She sounded aghast.
“You think cannons are only on boats? ”
“No, but...” Gwyn was at a loss now. He would have loved to see the look on her face, but he kept his eyes steadfastly searching the area, doing his best to remain alert. “But still...even if you need the Union, it doesn’t seem terribly likely they would help. What would be in it for them? ”
“That’s what I’m hoping to find out. But at this point, anything would be helpful for us, for Kelemir I mean, even just a clear idea of what’s going on with the Emperor or of what we might expect if these false Raiders manage whatever it is they’re trying to accomplish. We don’t even know what their goal is. ”
“Deceivers,” she muttered. “So that part was true as well. You’re sure those weren’t real Raiders you saw by the border? ”
“Yes. ”
“I’ve been hearing for a while about Raiders doing strange things, out-of-character things that aren’t in line with their expected duties. Attacking villages in Lyntara, that kind of thing. When I was looking for Meg, an old man told me that they’d been looking for mages who would then ‘disappear. ’”
“That could be explained by the mages we saw with them in Kelemir,” Dominic told her. “They must have been recruiting them. ”
“Or abducting them, like they did me. We don’t know that they all went willingly. ”
“They were specifically looking for necromancers. That ‘lorekeeper’ of yours told me as much. ”
Gwyn paused in her steps, looking at him directly. “You met her? And she didn’t turn you over to any Raiders? ”
Dominic hesitated. “Is that what happened to you? ”
“Yes. I found her in a cottage full of them. I was surrounded the moment I approached. ”
He could see the confusion in her eyes, and it was hard to know how to phrase his next words. “You are aware that your father’s friend was a necromancer as well? ”
“I can guess as much now, but I didn’t know that before I saw her. I had no idea. But she hadn’t aged a day, and there’s not much that can explain that. ” Gwyn took a sudden step towards him, her brows knitting together. “She didn’t hurt you, did she? You look the same. Maybe I should check-”
“No, no need. ” Dominic held up his free hand to ward her off. The idea of her checking him for injuries sent the heat rushing back to his face. “She didn’t use her magic on me or anything. ”
“She just let you go? ” Gwyn looked skeptical. “I would think for sure that she would have heard that these Raiders were looking for you, since she was apparently in league with them. ”
“Listen, I don’t want to upset you,” Dominic said uncertainly. “But she clearly betrayed you. Also let us not forget the whole necromancy part. I’m no master of the subject, but let’s face it, she had to be feeding off some number of people to remain so youthful for so long. It would be hard to attribute all of that to self-defense. The fact that she was apparently passing herself off as a midwife is particularly alarming. Infants die all the time, don’t they? How would anyone know if a child was actually born dead except the midwife? ”
It seemed like a cogent and sensible argument to Dominic, and he felt a mild urge to raise a fist in the air in triumph at its successful conveyance.
“I’m already aware of all this, Dominic. Why would you telling me that upset me any more than I already am? ” Gwyn asked slowly.
And just like that, the urge disappeared without a trace.
“Dumb animals! ” the elf cried from some distance ahead. “If he had a brain, he would have killed her! That’s what he’s trying to tell you without upsetting you because he wants to mate with you! Honest to the goddess, we will turn around and put an end to this nonsense if you don’t start walking! ”
Gwyn’s eyes went huge, but she turned around and resumed walking.
Dominic followed, still lightly holding her arm, but his stomach had turned to lead. “Gwyn, I know you said she was a friend, but-”
“How could you possibly have killed her? Was she drunk or something? ” Gwyn interrupted. He couldn’t read the tone of her voice, and it unnerved him.
“No. She was sleeping when I found her. I woke her first to talk to her, but I already had my knife...well. ” He fell silent. Already her expected reply was playing out in his head: What kind of monster cuts a woman’s throat in her bed?
“That was very clever. You might keep that in mind if you ever have to take me out,” Gwyn said.
Dominic blinked, then went over what she had just said in his mind several times, sifting the words for sarcasm.
But he found none.
“You sound sincere,” he hazarded, already tensing in anticipation of her answer.
“I am,” she said, glancing back at him. “Why wouldn’t I be? ”
“I thought you realized now that...taking you out would take me out, too. ”
“Nevertheless, you may find yourself in the position of needing to do it, and if that time comes, well, you know what to do. ” She paused. “It’s actually rather comforting to think that it’s possible. I had worried...well, that you would be defenseless against me. ”
He felt too confused to be experiencing the relief he was sure would have existed under any other circumstances. “What do you imagine happening that I would feel the need to kill us both, Gwyn? ”
“I don’t. I don’t imagine anything. Things just happen. ” Her voice was flat, almost lifeless. “I told you I have a temper. My control slips. I’d give anything for it not to be so, but I accepted long ago that this is how I am. ”
He didn’t know what to say to that. The thought of killing her somehow managed to be even more repulsive to him now than it had been the first time it had come up back at her cottage. The very idea of holding his knife to her throat made him want to retch.
They walked on in silence.
––––––––
It was dawn before the elf finally stopped to allow them to rest. He didn’t look tired in the least, just as fresh and disgruntled in appearance as he’d been when Gwyn had first seen him in the tree.
Surely he has to sleep sometime, she thought, but as she watched in disbelief, he leaned against one of the trees, his liquid green eyes narrowed in obvious annoyance as he, in turn, watched Dominic put down the haversack and take off Gwyn’s cloak.
Dominic had been wearing it all that time in spite of the heat, and she imagined it had to be a relief to take it off, but to her surprise, he promptly laid it on the ground in the shade of one of the trees and motioned to her.
“You can rest here,” he said, his eyes not quite meeting hers.
“It’s absurd watching you with her,” the elf announced before she could respond. “You could not have been brought up with people. You would have seen how these things are done. Surely the animals who did raise you taught you how baby animals are made. ”
Dominic clenched his jaw and pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s none of your concern, thanks,” he said in a tone that was anything but grateful.
“On the contrary, it is very much our concern,” the elf retorted. “If the pains overtake you before you meet the High Lord, you will do us no good at all. ”
Gwyn’s blood ran cold. “What do you mean, if the pains overtake him? ”
Dominic turned to her quickly, opening his mouth, but the elf put in loudly, “The pains will worsen until he can do nothing but die if he does not claim his mate. We told him this before. ”
“What? ” Gwyn was horrified. “Is that what you meant when you said my scent would only be good enough for a time? I thought you just meant we couldn’t be separated again, not that we actually had to-”
“That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you,” Dominic interrupted, his eyes flashing. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to or I’ll die. What kind of choice is that? ”
“Whether I feel like it’s the case or not, it’s how it is, now isn’t it? ” Her voice was rising and she saw the elf wince, but she didn’t care. “What kind of choice do you have? Good lord, Dominic, don’t you think I have a right to know this kind of thing? ”
Gwyn felt her control on her shield shuddering, and she clutched at it, closing her eyes and willing herself to take deep breaths. Stay calm, Gwyn. He’s an idiot, that’s all. You’ve met lots of those before without doing them bodily harm. You can handle one more.
“I would rather die than force you. That is the choice I have, the choice I’ve made. ” Dominic’s quiet voice broke into her mental chant. “And holding my death over your head if you don’t consent is another means of force. If you don’t want me-”
“You’re an idiot! ” It was out before she could stop it. “You haven’t been paying attention at all! I can want anyone who wants me first! Wanting is not an issue! ”
Dominic’s face went flinty, his eyes narrowing like the elf’s. “I want you to choose me uninfluenced, or it’s not happening. If I die, then that’s the consequence. Your consent should not hinge on my...problem. ”
“You’re being ridiculous! ” Gwyn pressed the heels of her hands to her eyes, struggling to maintain control, but the blood that had first run cold was now boiling. “You’re making too much of this. If I consent, what difference does it make why I consent? How can saving someone’s life not be a good enough reason? ”
“Because you’re not fully free under that kind of pressure. I won’t have it,” he said coldly. “I won’t have you like that. ”
She dropped her hands to glare at him. “And if I consent because you’re good-looking, or just because I feel like it? Will that suffice? Or is there a list of reasons that will suit your irrational whims? ” she demanded, adopting his frosty tone.
He gave her a long, unreadable look that made her skin prickle uncomfortably. “You think I’m making too much of this, but I think you’re not making enough of it,” he said, now sounding only tired. “You don’t understand why this is so important. But I’m glad. It means you’ve never been forced before. I intend to keep it that way. ”
It took a moment for the words to fully register. Then her anger was gone in a moment, and she neither knew nor understood what replaced it, only that it hurt intensely to breathe. “You’ve...” She couldn’t finish it.
“Some would say it’s nothing more than what I deserved. I am, after all, a monster,” he said, an almost wry tone in his voice, but he looked down at the cloak on the ground and motioned to it again. “Rest now, before it gets too hot. ”
Gwyn was too shocked to argue. Having isolated herself as much as possible from other people after leaving her parents’ house, the idea of a man having such an experience was one that was utterly foreign to her. She wasn’t entirely certain what it even meant in practice, though she shied desperately away from any such speculation. The thought of someone hurting Dominic pushed her into a strange place between desolate and destructive; she wanted to cry but also break things.
Gods, no wonder he’s fighting this mating thing so hard, even knowing what it will cost him. Now his body is forcing him into the same kind of situation all over again, doing things he doesn’t want to do. She felt herself tipping further into desolation by the moment, tears pricking the backs of her eyes. She swallowed hard and bit her lip, trying to hold them back. How can I be a party to that now, knowing this? Even if it saves his life...it could be a horrible thing for him. Who knows what he’d be thinking about, what he’d be reliving. He said some would say he deserved it...does he think he did?
She went to the cloak, but she took him by the arms and pulled him down with her onto it. His eyes were very wide and very dark, but she murmured, “You need to rest too, and you need to be able to smell me, right? I won’t do anything. Just lie here beside me. ”
“One of us should keep an eye on him,” Dominic mouthed silently. Gwyn’s eyes darted up to the elf, who was still leaning against the same tree behind Dominic, watching them silently with a wrinkled nose.
“He could have gutted us in our sleep already,” she mouthed back, ducking her head so her face would be out of the elf’s line of sight. Then she said out loud, “Rest. ” She turned her back to him and laid her head down on her arm. A moment later she heard a rustle that she hoped meant he was doing the same, then a gentle weight descended onto the dip of her waist, and she felt his fingers fan out over her lightly. She felt guilty at the tingles that rippled through her belly from his touch. Now is not the time, so knock it off, she told her body sternly.
“Is this okay? ” he whispered, the most tentative she’d ever heard him.
“Absolutely,” she whispered back.
The elf made an irritated noise in the back of his throat. “Just go to sleep. All this mewling. ” He muttered something else she couldn’t quite catch, but she thought it was about animals again.
Gwyn doubted her ability to get to sleep with the elf’s eyes on them, or even with Dominic’s hand resting on her so casually. The eerie silence of the surrounding woods also wasn’t very helpful. All night long, she’d heard nothing but their own movements as they walked, even the crickets falling silent as the elf moved past, she and Dominic trailing in his wake. She thought she’d gotten used to it over the course of the preceding hours, but now that they were lying down, the sun rising overhead behind the leafy canopy of the trees, it was unbelievably disturbing to be outside hearing nothing. No birds, no insects, no squirrels. Nothing.
She breathed Dominic’s name, knowing how sensitive his hearing was but not wanting to wake him if he’d already nodded off.
“Gwyn,” he returned in the same way.
“It’s too quiet. ”
“No, it’s not. You’re talking. Go to sleep,” the elf barked.
Gwyn rolled her eyes, but she did it silently. Eventually she managed to drift off into some kind of half-sleep.
When she fully woke again, it was because she was on her back, the elf hovering over her, straddling her legs, his long, tapered hand ripping at the bodice of her dress.
She screamed.
The elf recoiled at the sound, then growled, pulling back his hand to strike her just before he went flying off of her, sprawling against one of the trees with a thud.
Dominic was on his feet beside her, snarling in a way that truly did sound...animal. It raised the hairs on the back of her neck, but she scrambled to her feet, grabbing him by the arm as he crouched as if to lunge, his black eyes never leaving the elf.
“Dominic, don’t,” she said urgently. “You need him to get us over the border, remember? ”
“They need us to go over the border for them. They can always send another one,” he hissed.
“Or they can swarm and kill us. Please don’t do this. ”
The elf was back on his feet by that time, glowering at Dominic as he rubbed the back of his bald head. “Foolish monster. We only meant to teach you what your animal parent didn’t. We heard you moaning in your sleep. How much longer do you think you can go on like this? We need you...coherent. It will only get worse. It’s already getting worse. If you lose control of yourself before the pain takes you, then what? You’re stronger than she is, much stronger. Animals are fragile. You could kill her. Then where will we be? Be reasonable, if one such as you can be. Take her now while you can still show some restraint. ”
“This is a matter you’re incapable of understanding. Leave it be. We’re handling it without your lessons,” Dominic said from between clenched teeth, his hands curling into fists at his sides.
Gwyn noticed he hadn’t drawn his knife this time, though the expression on his face was certainly murderous. She could feel pressure against her anima shield that more than verified that it was no pretense for the elf’s benefit. Wow, he must really be upset if he forgot about his knife, she thought uneasily. It had seemed to fly almost of its own accord into his hands before when there was a threat.
“Can you leave us be a moment so he can calm down? ” Gwyn asked the elf. “You know we can’t disappear on you. ”
The elf showed no sign of even hearing her, but after a moment he gave a derisive-sounding snort and headed off into the trees.
Gwyn sighed, releasing Dominic’s arm, but immediately he turned to her, his shoulders still hunched and rigid, his eyes too dark, his nostrils flaring.
Gwyn’s first instinct was to step away from him, put distance between them, but instead she forced herself to move closer, and a moment later his face was buried against her shoulder. He was breathing deeply, and she felt awkward and embarrassed, knowing that he was smelling her. And I must stink by this point. There’s no way around it. It’s been so hot. I don’t see how he can stand doing this.
Not only could he stand it, but a sound suspiciously like a moan left him, one arm loosely wrapping itself around her waist as he breathed. That sound sent another ripple through her.
Despair washed over her.
“Oh lord of pain, what are we going to do? ” she groaned. “I can’t stand it when you make those noises. You’re going to kill me, and it’s not going to be while bedding me, it’s going to be while determinedly not bedding me. ”
He lifted his face, his eyes startled. “What do you mean? ”
“What do you think I mean? ” She made herself meet those eyes, even as her face burned with mortification. “I’m not trying to say I have it harder than you do, I know I don’t, but it’s still miserable having someone so lovely lusting after me and not being able to do a damn thing about it. And I feel bad because I know you don’t want to be wanting me and it’s all involuntary on your part, but the gods help me if I don’t really want to make my father roll over in his grave right about now. ”
Dominic looked stunned, drawing back a little, his eyes searching her face. “We barely know each other. ”
“Then let’s do something about that, but Dominic, we have to do something. Trying to ignore it isn’t working. You must see that dying in agony is not a reasonable choice. Neither is breaking my neck while overcome by passion, if what that elf says has any merit at all. Tell me how to make this easier for you. What do I need to do to help you get through this? How do I convince you that I’m okay with being your mate? ”
“Are you okay with it? I don’t see how you could be. All of this has been forced on you. ” His voice was tight, his eyes troubled. “You’re only agreeing because you have a compassionate heart. ”
The earnestness in his face sent a pang through her. “No, I really don’t. ” She hesitated, dropping her eyes. She felt more than mortification now. She felt ashamed. He’s looking at me like he really believes that. Maybe he’ll feel better about doing what he needs to do if he knows the truth about me.
“That woman with the Raiders got one thing right, I guess. I just didn’t want to admit it. I...I don’t normally...do the kind of thing I did for you. In the woods, I mean, when I found you. I don’t know why I helped you then. No, that’s not true. ” She willed herself to meet his gaze again. “I thought you would die. So helping you would be safe. That’s all there was to it. No compassion there. I knew I would feel bad if I didn’t try. I helped you because I didn’t want to feel bad and I knew, or I thought I knew, that trying wouldn’t really cost me anything. If you’d looked like you would have lived, I would have probably kept walking. ”
“Because I’m not human? ” he asked softly.
“No,” she said, surprised. “I thought you were human until I got you back to my cottage. ”
“Then why? Are you saying you don’t care what happens to other people? ” He brushed a strand of hair away from her face, her heart fluttering in spite of herself at the brush of his fingers. “I don’t believe that. ”
Gwyn frowned. “But I just told you-”
“And I believe you believe what you told me. But Gwyn, you live alone in the middle of nowhere. You avoid people as much as possible. I understand that. I do the same thing. You think it’s to keep yourself safe from them, but that’s not really what it is, is it? ” He lowered his face to hers, looking deeply into her eyes, and her heart skipped a beat. “You’re keeping them safe from you. Being cold to others protects them from you. ”
She wanted to deny it. It didn’t sound nearly as awful as she felt it was. “You’re sweetening it up, it’s not as nice as that,” she accused. “Did you miss the part where I would have left you to die if I had thought you could be saved? ”
“I didn’t miss the part where you were afraid of killing me if you failed. ” He frowned a little. “I was wrong about one thing though. ”
Gwyn was afraid to even ask what it was. She only raised an eyebrow and hoped he could see it being as close to her face as he was.
“I said we barely know each other. But I realize now that I do know you. ” He lowered his head to her shoulder again, drew in a deep breath, and said as he exhaled, “I didn’t think there was anyone else like me in the world, but I was wrong about that, too. You know me better than you think you do, if you know yourself at all. ”
Unbidden, the words the woman in the camp had told her came rushing back. You are each the piece that the other is missing. You are his humanity, and he is your heart.
“If I’m like you, Dominic, then you’re human, right? ” She could barely hear herself, but he tensed against her, and she knew he heard.
“If you fools won’t mate, we need to be moving on. ” The elf’s voice shattered the silence around them like a crow’s shrill caw.
Dominic lifted his head and put his mouth close to her ear. “There’s nothing you have to do. You’re not the one who needs convincing. I understand now. ”
He moved away before she could even react, gathering up the haversack.
What the hell does that mean? she wanted to demand as he slid his arm through its strap and motioned for her to move off of the cloak so he could pick it up. Who needs convincing then, and of what? Surely he can’t mean me?
The elf was already moving away, and she hurried to follow. Her thoughts were a whirl of confusion, and Dominic’s face betrayed nothing.
But he walked slightly ahead of her now, positioning himself none-too-subtly between her and the elf.
Gwyn had a bad feeling about that.
