Chapter Ten
The smell of musty books and the quiet of the library soothed Anne’s nerves as she finished the remainder of the work for the assembly. The menus and guest lists were ready for approval, and other lists ready for the cook and the housekeeper. She tried to block out Mrs. Worth’s words but couldn’t. The woman was a shrew, but she did have a point. Anne Townsend and her sisters were not fit for proper society.
She buried her face in her hands. No matter what she did, Anne failed. While her sisters were part of local society, their connections were insufficient for them to marry well. They were running out of money. Sir John was no help. He owed more money than Anne had ever seen in her life.
“Anne,” Nathaniel said. She heard the door close behind him.
Anne’s shoulders sagged. She just didn’t have the energy to deal with him now. “Please leave me alone.”
“I want to apologize for my behavior.” He came closer. “I had no right to suggest you had anything to do with the behavior of Worth and the others.”
If he only knew. “Mr. Matthews, I have to ask you to—”
He was so close she could smell his particular scent. She breathed it in.
“Don’t ask me to stay away, because I can’t.” Nathaniel’s voice was low, gravelly, and danced along her nerve endings.
Anne forced herself to be stern. Someone had to be the practical one. “People are going to talk. Lady Danford is already suspicious.”
“Let them.” He traced his finger delicately across the top of her hand.
Anne snatched her hands from his touch. “Why? For a bit of fun while you are here?”
“What’s wrong with a bit of fun?” Nathaniel smiled a cat-and-cream sort of smile.
Lord, she was tempted. But he would ruin her, leave, and not look back. She’d be left to clean up the mess. “When do you return to London?”
“My plans are not firm yet. I’d like to stay for the assembly.” His voice was soft. “If you want me to, that is.”
“Do as you wish.” She kept her voice crisp.
“One word from you is all it will take.”
Anne pushed herself back into the chair to avoid him. He pulled at her with his warm eyes and smiled, but she shook her head. “I can’t.”
Nathaniel moved around the desk and pulled her up and into his arms. She wanted to fight him, but couldn’t. His warmth wrapped around her, comforted her. She closed her eyes and let him envelop her.
Nathaniel lifted her chin so that she met his eyes. His thumb feathered gently across her bottom lip. “I don’t want to leave.”
“I can’t risk—”
“For once in your life, Anne, just take it as it comes.” He bent down and kissed her gently.
Something inside her snapped. He was right. Why shouldn’t she take what she wanted?
Anne raised her hands and cupped his face. The roughness of his whiskers rubbed against her fingertips. She pulled him down for a deeper kiss, her lips parting and her tongue seeking his. She needed him at this moment to blind her to what was going on around her.
She needed to take the reins, to have control of something at this time when everything was out of control. Her hands trailed into his hair as Nathaniel groaned and returned her kiss.
She molded her body to his, wanting to be closer. He was leaning on the desk. She pressed her hips to his, could feel him growing hard. She ran her hands down his chest to his waist, feeling his strength. She wanted to feel his skin, to taste it with her tongue.
Anne was hungry for more of him. For something she couldn’t even put a name to. Never had she felt so reckless, so wild. Her lips clung to his. She pressed her body closer.
Nathaniel came up for air. “Anne, we have to stop, sweetheart.”
Anne took his mouth again, unwilling to let go of this sense of power, of reducing this man to a puddle as he’d done to her so many times before.
His hands traced her back and cupped her bottom, melding his body with hers.
“Pardon me.”
Anne felt as if ice water had been dumped on her. Nathaniel acted faster. He quickly turned her to hide her from the maid.
“What do you need?” His voice was gruff.
“Her ladyship needs Miss Townsend in the drawing room, sir.”
“She’ll be there directly.”
As soon as the door closed Anne pushed herself out of his arms. This was why she always remained in control. She should never have given in to the passion. “It will be all over Beetham tomorrow that you and I were—” She moved to the door. “I need to go.”
“Anne, wait. I didn’t mean—”
“No. The best thing you can do for me is to stay away.” She opened the door and looked back at him. He had a puzzled look on his face. “Please.”
“I’m not sure I can, Anne. But it will be as you wish.”
Anne closed the door behind her and covered her face in her hands, feeling tears pricking her eyes.
“Are you all right, miss?”
Anne had forgotten the maid. She wiped her face and smiled. “Just a sudden headache. Would you give Lady Danford my regrets? I fear I need to lie down.”
“Are you well enough to go home? Should I call for the carriage?”
“No, thank you. The walk will do me good.” She smiled to reassure the maid.
Thankfully, the kitchen was empty when Anne went to collect her cloak and bonnet. She quickly made her way out the back of the house and into the crisp air. Her ankle was sore but not terribly so. She’d have to put compresses on when she returned home.
She was such a fool.
She’d let things get way out of control. It had felt so good to be touched, kissed, loved.
But it wasn’t love. It was desire. Passion. It would burn hot and fast but die quickly.
Nathaniel Matthews was only interested in a bit of fun, not marriage.
Anne would be no man’s mistress.
Anne found Sophia in the kitchen nursing a cup of tea. “What are you doing in here?”
Sophia looked up from her teacup. “John has the front parlor. If I had to hear him whine one more time about the brandy being upstairs, I was going to scream.”
“Who are you and what have you done with my sister?”
“Seriously, Anne, all he does is complain.” Sophia sipped her tea. “I thought you’d be at the Lodge all day.”
Anne kept silent as she removed her pelisse and hat and hung them on the hook by the door. “I came home early. Mrs. Worth called on Lady Danford and had some really scathing things to say about me.”
“That sow!”
“Sophia!” Anne laughed. She was thinking the same thing. She retrieved a cup from the cupboard. “Any more tea?”
Sophia poured her a cup. “Doesn’t she realize her son is a total idiot? Honestly, to read that passage in church. It was totally uncalled for.”
Anne sipped slowly, letting the warmth chase the cold away. “True.”
“What’s going on between you and Nathaniel Matthews? The man won’t even look my way if you are in the room.”
Anne sputtered. “Nothing. Really, it’s nothing.”
“John swears that Mr. Matthews is going to offer for you.”
“Why would he say that?”
Sophia looked smug. “I think it’s more hope than anything else. If Mr. Matthews marries you, then he’ll have to forgive John’s debt.”
“You cannot be serious.” Anne set the cup down with a clatter.
“He also said Mr. Matthews had you pressed against a tree. He thought the man was attacking you but soon realized you had your arms wrapped around him. A tree, Anne? Really?”
“Oh God.”
“If that’s the case, you will have to marry Mr. Matthews.”
It’d be a cold day in hell before that happened. The man desired her, for sure, but he wouldn’t want his family connected to hers. “John has hinted as much, but I doubt very seriously Mr. Matthews wants to attach his family to ours, especially given the amount of debt that John has incurred.”
“The sum is that much?”
Anne nodded. “John is in a great deal of trouble. The fact is, I think he’s put us all in danger.”
Sophia looked alarmed. “Surely not.”
“Creditors want to be paid. Who knows what they’ll do to get their money? Even come after us for it.”
“But we don’t have it!”
“I know. I’m at a loss as to what to do.”
“John made this mess—he should fix it.” Sophia pushed her teacup away.
Anne snorted. “That’s not likely, is it?”
“Perhaps you should encourage Nathaniel Matthews,” Sophia said. “He is very rich and he likes you well enough to kiss you. He’s not likely to approve of my match with Tony.”
“I don’t expect to marry,” Anne said shortly.
“I know we’ve disparaged your looks, but you aren’t ugly.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“I think it does.” Sophia paused. “There is something else going on. You’ve been acting strangely for a week now. I thought it was because you were jealous, but that’s not it.”
“Jealous? I doubt that.” Anne watched her sister for a moment. Perhaps Sophia would have a clue how to fix this. “I will tell you, but you cannot laugh and you cannot tell another soul. Swear.”
Sophia laughed. “Honestly, Anne, you’re being melodramatic.”
Anne whispered, “I climbed the Fairy Steps.”
“So? You walk them all the time.”
“I climbed them without touching the walls.” She stared at Sophia, willing her to understand.
“But that’s just a fable . . .” Sophia’s eyes met hers. “Did you see a real fairy?”
“I don’t know about the fairy, but I did get a wish.” Anne felt the heat creep up in her face.
“What did you wish for?”
Anne frowned at her. “I was thinking about our situation and this old woman kept hounding me to come up with a wish.”
“There was an old woman? Not a fairy?”
“Yes. It was all quite odd. I thought it was just a joke, so I wished for a rich, handsome man to fall passionately in love with me.”
“So that’s why Mr. Matthews cannot leave you alone. I knew it had to be something!”
Anne glared at her sister. “Thank you for that.”
Sophia had the grace to look chagrined. “That’s not what I meant. You know he’d never have noticed you if we were in Town.”
Anne agreed but didn’t want to belabor the point. “Now I’m trying to undo the wish before anyone gets hurt. But nothing is working.”
“Let me get this straight. You think Mr. Matthews’s attentions are related to the wish?”
Anne nodded.
“Mr. Worth and Tony as well?”
“Yes. They are all affected by the wish.” Anne slumped in her chair. “None of it is real.”
Sophia shook her head. “I don’t believe it. Mr. Matthews has real feelings for you. I’ve seen the way he acts around you. The way he looks at you. It’s different from the others.”
“It’s all because of the wish,” Anne said. “Sophia, I have to do something.”
“Fine. I’ll help,” Sophia said. “What do you want me to do?”
“I need you to climb the Fairy Steps to get a wish. You will then use that wish to cancel out my wish.”
“But what if I want to wish for something else?”
“Sophia, please,” Anne begged. “I have to put an end to it.”
“Why, Anne? A rich, handsome man likes you a great deal. You like him back or else you wouldn’t kiss him in public.”
“It was not public! It was the woods.”
“What’s the harm in letting things go as they are?”
Anne sighed heavily. “I can’t stand the thought of him waking up and suddenly finding himself married to me and then hating me for it. I can’t face him, knowing that it was all fairy magic. I can’t trap him like that.”
“I’ll climb the steps for you, if I must,” Sophia said. “But I think you’re wrong about Nathaniel Matthews.”
Anne sighed and picked up her teacup. If only.
The next day Anne hurried away from the Lodge, her head down to try to block the cold wind. She pulled her cloak closer around her.
She’d managed to escape before Nathaniel found her. The man practically stalked her while she was in the house. Now the servants were teasing her about him being sweet on her.
Then there were the cravings. She wanted to see him. She wanted to kiss him. She needed his touch on her skin like she needed to breathe. She couldn’t turn it off. Even while she was avoiding Nathaniel, she was secretly hoping to see him. Just once more.
“Miss Townsend, I’ve been waiting for you.”
Anne looked up, startled to see Cecil Worth leaning against a tree near the road. The arrogant toad. “Why would you wait for me?” She brushed by him, intent on ignoring him.
“Surely you know my feelings for you. I thought I had made them clear.” He held out his hands in supplication.
Was he serious? “Make your feelings known to someone else. After the debacle in church, I want nothing more to do with you.”
Mr. Worth grabbed her arm. “At least give me the chance to apologize, Miss Townsend. Anne, please.”
His voice grated on her ears. “Apology accepted. Now please leave me be.”
He clasped her hand in his. Anne tried to pull away. “Let me go.”
“My dear, I want to marry you.”
Anne’s eyebrows rose. “Perhaps you should discuss this with your mother before going further.” She yanked her hand from his.
“What has Mother to do with us?”
Anne raised her chin. “She has accused me of bewitching you.”
Mr. Worth laughed. “She is mad.”
“Mad or not, I have no wish to cross paths with her again. I’ve heard quite enough already.” She turned to leave him. The hour was growing late. The last thing Anne’s reputation needed was to be caught alone with Cecil Worth, the idiot.
“Mother was here at the Lodge?” Cecil’s face flushed with anger. “I specifically told her not to meddle in my affairs.”
A tremor of fear went through Anne. “She is trying to keep you from an imprudent match. In this case I agree with her.”
Cecil grabbed her arms and pulled her close. “You don’t mean that, Anne.”
Anger warred with fear and the anger won. Anne shoved Cecil hard, forcing him to release her. “Get your hands off of me.”
“Anne, Mother won’t interfere.”
“There is nothing to interfere with, Mr. Worth.”
“I want to marry you.”
“I do not want to marry you.” Anne moved past him, hoping if she ignored him, he’d take the hint. He didn’t. He followed her.
“You won’t get a better offer.”
She gasped and whirled. “I’d rather be a spinster, thank you.”
“If you are holding out for Nathaniel Matthews, you will remain an old maid. He would never marry for so little a temptation.”
A sharp pain seared through Anne. Hearing the truth from a third party was a great deal more painful, even from a worm like Cecil Worth. “I’m not holding out for anyone, Mr. Worth, including you.”
She turned on her heel and walked toward the house before she gave in to the urge to slap the smile from his face.
“You should consider my offer, Miss Townsend,” Worth shouted at her.
“I would rather die, Mr. Worth, than marry you!” she shouted back. She walked faster, anger churning inside her. Stupid man. How dare he?
“Who’s going to protect you from the trouble your brother is in?”
Anne turned and found him close behind her. She clenched her hands into fists. “What do you know about John?”
“Only that he’s in deep with some very nasty people. It could ruin your family’s good reputation.”
“We’ve managed before. We will again.”
Cecil just glared at her. Lord, he was short. They almost met eye to eye. “Get to the point.”
“Those men will come after you. They won’t rest until they have their money—or blood.”
Anne was afraid that might be true. “We have nothing. Surely they will see the reason in that.”
He chuckled. “You are so naïve. These men don’t see reason.”
“We will manage.”
“My offer stands, Anne. I can take care of you.”
“And my sisters?”
Cecil remained silent. Anne pushed past him. Did he expect her to just walk away from her sisters? After a few steps she turned and looked back. “Mr. Worth, nothing could tempt me to marry a man who would leave my sisters alone to fend for themselves.”