I drove home from the hospital as the sun was beginning to rise. I discovered it was not a good idea for me to own this car when I realized I was going 150 mph as I put the car into sixth gear. My license would be suspended inside a week.
I parked the car in the driveway and took a boiling hot shower. I stuffed my suit, shirt, socks and underwear in the washing machine with plenty of bleach. The clothes would be ruined, of course, but I had over fifty thousand dollars in cash and a new Ferrari. I could afford it. Removing the blood and brains from a suit would be impossible in any case.
I changed into shorts and a t-shirt and turned on the television. When I opened the refrigerator I braced myself for the sight of a human head, but found only a moldy head of lettuce in the crisper bin. I took out a beer and sat back on the couch just as I heard the familiar bang of the Saturday morning paper against the door.
The lead story concerned Deputy Jones of the Champaign County Sheriff’s Department. Apparently, after his death in the car collision, family members had been cleaning out his basement when they made a gruesome discovery. Deputy Jones was into some strange occult religion that involved human sacrifice. The heads of at least three different people, as well as limbs from a number of other people, were found in his large freezer. The FBI was investigating other members of the Sheriff’s Department for possible involvement. At least five members of the department were on paid leave pending investigation.
Sharing the front page was a story about a fire at a campus chicken coop that was being used as a hiding place for a large narcotics ring. The authorities believed a Mexican drug cartel was involved. No reason was stated as to why they had chosen a chicken coop. Authorities were waiting for chemical analysis of the drug to be completed. If it was cocaine, as suspected, it would be the largest find in Champaign County history, as well as the largest in the State of Illinois. They estimated that over 600 kilograms of cocaine was left after the fire. The cause was not known at the time of the publication.
In unrelated news, circuit court Judge Roads had resigned from his position. Apparently he wanted to spend more time with his family. He was only forty-nine years old.
On page two it was reported that authorities had found the body of a badly decomposed African American male. He had lost his head as well as most of his innards, and what remained had been found in Crystal Lake Park. The body had clearly been underwater for some time.
The international news included a story about a suicide bomber who set off an explosion in Jerusalem at the Western Wall that killed at least four people as well as the bomber himself. At least one American and two British citizens were among the dead. The militant group Hamas had taken responsibility for the bombing. Both the United States President and the Prime Minister of the United Kingdom had condemned the bombing. There were also a few paragraphs concerning ten people who had been killed in Rwanda. There were no details other than that all ten victims were female. In response to such attacks, the United Nations authorities intended to speak with government leaders.
The environmental news was not much better, reporting the finding of a “dead zone” just off the coast of the Greek Island, Patmos. It is an area in the ocean where no fish, coral or animals can survive. Scientists attribute the problem to pollution and run-off from the island.
A hurricane had left ten thousand people on the Island of Haiti without water. The President has refused to sign a treaty related to global warming, alleging that the problem is caused by natural weather cycles as opposed to man-made pollution. The United States was the only member of the G8 not to sign the agreement.
I switched to the sports page. The Cubs had beaten the Cardinals in the last of a three game series by ten runs.
Only the comics were safe. They were kind of funny.
I was exhausted and decided to go to bed. In the morning I would start contemplating a new career. What I really needed was a vacation. My good friend Seth and his sister Maya ran a small resort in Vancouver and had been bugging me to pay them a visit. It was about time I did so.
I took off my shirt and walked into my bedroom for a sleep I had truly earned. I turned on the light to the bedroom and found Susan lying asleep in my bed. She was wearing a revealing purple satin night gown and nothing else.
As I sat on the bed she awoke and said, “Sam, I—”
I kissed her hard, ending the conversation, and held her tight in my arms. She smelled of fabric softener and vanilla. Her long red hair was fanned out behind her.
In the morning I would tell her everything that had happened. She would believe me or think I was crazy. In the morning I would tell her everything, but tonight there was no Voodoo or evil pharmaceutical companies. There was only the two of us.
I removed the rest of my clothes and lay naked beside her. We held each other close for a long time. I effortlessly entered her, and it felt as though we had always belonged together. Long after the act of lovemaking was complete we held onto each other. In time I could feel her heartbeat slow and the warm breath across my face become more rhythmic and even.
I slept a dreamless sleep.
* * * * * *
Author and attorney Scott A. Lerner resides in Champaign, Illinois. He obtained his undergraduate degree in psychology from the University of Wisconsin in Madison and went on to obtain his Juris Doctor degree from the University of Illinois in Urbana Champaign. He is currently a sole practitioner in Champaign, Illinois. The majority of his law practice focuses on the fields of criminal law and family law.
Mr. Lerner lives with his wife, their two children, and their cat Fern. Lerner collects unusual antiques and enjoys gardening, traveling, reading fiction and going to the movies. Cocaine Zombies is his first published novel. Coming soon, the sequel: Ruler of Demons.
You can find Scott online at:
scottlerner.camelpress.com.