Ramcroft, 1823
“Jack’s coming home.”
Sophia’s pulse leapt in response to the words being spoken. She did not want to relish the news her friends were sharing, nor did she wish to look forward to the coming weeks with eager expectation. Jack Lancaster, Baron Hawthorne, did not deserve to be pined for. She ought to forget him. And yet...
“When is your brother due to arrive?” Her stomach fluttered in anticipation of what Jack’s sisters might say. At the age of twenty, the twins were only two years younger than Sophia, and although they were the daughters of an earl while she was nothing more than the local vicar’s foster child, they’d played together often while growing up and had remained close into adulthood.
Felicity, the more vocal twin, leaned forward. Unlike her sister, Kaitlin, whose hair was as black as Jack’s, Felicity had their mother’s auburn curls. “Tomorrow, so he can get settled before the rest of the guests arrive for the house party.”
The house party had been their father’s idea. Apparently, after declaring his daughters’ debuts and subsequent Season a failure, he’d invited five gentlemen to visit his home for the next few weeks. The intention behind it was obvious and had caused both Felicity and Kaitlin to look uncomfortable when they’d mentioned it to Sophia during their last get-together.
“So soon?” Sophia clutched her cup and tried to ignore the frantic beat of her heart.
“We’re hoping you’ll join us for dinner on Saturday,” Kaitlin said with a gentle smile. “So we’ll not have to face all the men Mama and Papa have invited alone.”
Sophia took a hasty sip of her tea. See Jack? Dine with him at Eastgate Abbey? Relive the pain of his indifference?
She’d rather toss herself into a frozen lake.
“Thank you,” she told her friends, her voice not nearly as firm as she wished, “but I fear I must decline.”
Felicity and Kaitlin shared a look. They flattened their mouths and straightened their backs. Whatever levity they’d shown before vanished beneath a layer of determination.
Sophia steeled herself.
“We thought you might,” Felicity said.
“So we made a plan,” Kaitlin added.
Unease slid down Sophia’s spine. “How do you mean?”
“Well, we think it would be splendid if you and Jack were to marry,” Felicity said.
Sophia stared at her friend. Her grip on her teacup tightened. “No.”
“But you’ve been in love with him since forever,” Kaitlin said.
“Feelings change,” Sophia said.
“Have yours?” Felicity asked.
She wanted to say yes and deny the yearnings of her heart, but she couldn’t. Felicity and Kaitlin were her dearest friends, and she’d never lied to them about anything. “No.”
“Good. Because we would like nothing better than for you to become our sister.” Felicity smiled while Kaitlin snatched up a biscuit and bit it in half.
Sophia sighed. “He doesn’t see me as a potential match and never will. For a good reason, if I may remind you.”
“I disagree,” Felicity said. “Mama and Papa have both welcomed you into our home.”
“As your friend,” Sophia pointed out. “Not as a candidate for the future Lady Hawthorne. No upstanding family would ever approve of their child marrying down.”
“You’re the best person there is,” Kaitlin argued.
“I am an orphan with no connections.” Sophia shook her head. She’d always known she was a fool for dreaming of Jack.
“That’s not true,” Felicity said. “Mr. and Mrs. Fenmore are both highly respected.”
“As they should be, but neither of them is my relation.” Sophia closed her eyes briefly against the reality of her situation. The vicar and his wife had raised her after finding her inside their church. According to what they’d told her, she’d managed to topple the basket she’d been in, and was tangled in her blanket on the cold stone floor. Her desperate cries had gone straight to the Fenmore’s hearts. And although they’d already had a son of their own, they’d never made a distinction between her and Edward, had raised them as though they were siblings by birth. She had nothing but love for them, but that didn’t mean she was blind to her situation.
“Semantics,” Felicity said as if she could brush aside every rule upon which Society rested. “We know you and Jack would be perfect together. Hence the plan.”
Against her better judgment, Sophia decided to humor her. “What does this plan of yours involve?”
“Getting Jack to pull his head out of his—”
“Kaitlin,” Felicity chastised. She gave her younger sister a hard look, then turned her attention back to Sophia. “It is our belief that Jack could be persuaded to make you an offer of marriage.”
“How romantic,” Sophia muttered. “Perhaps we should tie him up too and force him to speak his vows?”
“Based on observation,” Felicity went on, ignoring Sophia’s remark, “he cares for you a great deal.”
“I disagree.” The manner in which they’d last parted had proven the opposite. But Sophia had never shared Jack’s last words to her with anyone. Instead, she’d carried that pain alone.
“He never kept us company growing up, unless you happened to be there,” Kaitlin said. “And after he went away to school, he’d always ask after you when he visited, until we invited you over.”
“Once you arrived, he’d light up,” Felicity said. “Have you forgotten how close the two of you were with your inside jokes and the way you’d always finish each other’s sentences?”
A knot formed in Sophia’s breast. Her fondest memories were of Jack, of him teaching her how to whistle, of the two of them fishing together while Kaitlin and Felicity chose to pick berries with Edward. Jack had even shown her how to whittle, allowing her to make a few cuts on the wooden rabbit he’d later gifted her for her birthday. The small figurine was her most prized possession.
Later, when Jack came home on holiday from Eton, they discussed his studies at length. The five years between them had never seemed to matter. And since she’d always read up on politics and philosophy during his absence, she’d been prepared to discuss his subjects of choice. She’d even kept abreast of all the news, just for the pleasure of seeing the look of surprise in his eyes when she referenced a bill passed in Parliament or some new scientific discovery.
“That was a long time ago,” Sophia said in response to Felicity’s question. “It’s been four years since Jack’s last visit to these parts.”
Kaitlin knit her brow. “Has it really?”
“During which we’ve not been in touch at all.” Sophia set her cup aside and folded her hands in her lap. “A lot can happen in four years. I do read the gossip column, in case you weren’t aware. So I know of Jack’s reputation.”
“Journalists write a great deal of things,” Felicity said. “It isn’t always true.”
“And even if it were,” Kaitlin put in, “I don’t see the issue. After all, Jack’s hardly the first man to have a few dalliances on his way toward matrimonial bliss.”
Sophia raised her eyebrows. “He’s been labeled a rake.”
“A misunderstanding, I’m sure,” Felicity said with absolute loyalty.
It was what Sophia hoped for too since she didn’t want to think less of the man she’d always held in such high regard. Still, the numerous accounts of him flirting with one debutante after another, of dancing daringly close with some and casting wicked glances at others, of changing mistresses so frequently she’d lost track, and of having affairs with other men’s wives, was cause for great concern.
“You’ll see,” Kaitlin said.
“Please change your mind about dinner,” Felicity pressed. “I know Jack would be thrilled to reconnect with you. And if you agree to our plan, then—”
“You’ve still not told me what this plan of yours entails,” Sophia said. As much as she loathed the idea of trying to sway Jack’s intentions toward her, she couldn’t stop her curiosity.
“We believe Jack has been taking you for granted,” Kaitlin said. “You’ve always been here, unattached, waiting for his return.”
“But what if that were to change?” Felicity asked. “What if when Jack arrives on Friday, you’ve already been spoken for?”
Sophia’s heart jolted. “What are you talking about?”
“Since our debuts last year, we’ve realized something.” Kaitlin glanced at Felicity before she said, “Men tend to have greater interest in a woman if other men are vying for her hand. It’s almost as if they suddenly notice her.”
“Which is why we’ve spoken with Edward,” Felicity said.
Sophia’s jaw dropped. “You’ve what?”
“It made sense to find out if he was willing to help before we mentioned the idea to you, and he has agreed.”
A new sort of panic swept through Sophia, brought on by the prospect of actually going through with this harebrained scheme. Edward was like a brother. She’d grown up alongside him. The idea of even feigning a courtship with him felt wrong. So it shocked her to learn he would do so since she was certain he must feel the same.
“I’m not the least bit comfortable with this,” she said. “It’s deceptive. What if someone gets hurt? Never mind the fact that I don’t believe your parents would give their blessing even if Jack were to propose. Which I doubt he will since he doesn’t love me in return.”
“That’s where we disagree,” Felicity said. “Kaitlin and I are of the opinion that Jack does love you but that he just hasn’t realized it yet. All we want to do is give him a nudge - a chance for him to come to terms with the contents of his heart before it’s too late.”
“Too late?” Sophia spoke the words with difficulty.
Felicity tilted her head. “You are two and twenty years of age, Sophia. How much longer do you think it will be before the Fenmores insist you marry?”
“I haven’t really thought about that,” Sophia told her. “It isn’t something we’ve discussed and with the murkiness surrounding my birth taken into account, I never really considered…”
“Perhaps you should,” Kaitlin told her gently.
Sophia supposed her friend was correct. She’d just gotten used to the way things were. A thought struck and she bit her lip as she pondered the recent church services she had attended with the Fenmores. They’d both been eager to introduce her to some of the local young men - a couple of farmers and the newly arrived school teacher. Furthermore, they were singing Edward’s praises to her every day now. Only she’d not put much weight in any of it until this very moment.
Had they been actively trying to bring about a courtship?
If so, then that had to mean they expected her to start thinking of marriage. Even if they’d not yet told her so directly.
She sank against her seat with a long exhale. Had she been two years younger, like Felicity and Kaitlin, and in their social position, she would have been presented at court. Parties would have been hosted in her name in an effort to find her a husband.
Sophia’s insides tightened as she considered the pressure Felicity and Kaitlin must be under. And as their friend, ought she not be there to offer support, regardless of whether or not she was forced to face Jack?
A deep inhale and the subsequent exhale brought her duty toward them into focus.
“Very well,” she said. “I’ll attend the dinner.”
Relief shone in both of her friends’ eyes.
“Thank you,” Felicity said. She seemed to hesitate before asking, “You’ll bring Edward with you?”
Sophia couldn’t very well go alone, and since the Fenmores didn’t care for grand affairs, he was her best choice of companion. “Yes. But not as my fake fiancé.”
Having to see Jack again would be bad enough without also trying to deceive him.
But when she spoke with Edward later, Sophia realized she wouldn’t have to do so if she agreed to his proposal. She stared at him while trying to come to grips with what he’d just said. “You… You want to marry me? In truth?”
He gave her a frank look. “Lady Felicity and her sister gave me the idea.”
Sophia blinked. “What they proposed, according to what I know, was for you and me to fake an engagement in the hope that Hawthorne would try and pursue me. I realize how ridiculous that sounds, but I suppose they think he’d get jealous or something and… Well, I told them I wouldn’t do it.”
“Because it would be wrong,” Edward said.
Sophia nodded. “Exactly.”
“But would it be so terribly wrong of you to actually consider me instead? As a genuine option?”
She shook her head. “You don’t love me, Edward. Not in that way at least. Do you?”
He shrugged. “I love you in my own sort of way, Sophia. And as such, I do believe you and I could be happy together.”
“But what about…” She waved her hand to avoid speaking the word.
“Desire?” he asked, studying her. When she gave a quick nod, he said, “In my opinion it’s overrated. Of greater importance is how well we get along, and you and I have a shared history. Our values are similar. I know you, Sophia, and you know me.”
“I suppose that’s true.”
There was a pause, and then he reached for her hand. “I realize your heart belongs to Hawthorne, but he has given you no reason to hope he’ll ever be more to you than the brother of your dear friends.”
This was true. In parting, he’d actually told her he expected to find her settled when he next saw her. The words had broken her heart and banished all hope. But to marry Edward?
She gazed at him, at the grave lines etched on his forehead and the firmness of his mouth. He’d chosen the same profession as his father and had just completed his eight-year-long education at seminary school a few months earlier. As such, he’d make an excellent catch for any gentlewoman from a good family. Especially once he got appointed to a parish.
Wanting only the best for him, Sophia could not ignore this fact and had to ask, “What about you, though? Are you certain you wish to throw away your chance of finding true love and happiness?”
He scoffed. “If I believed such things were within my reach, I’d chase them in a heartbeat. But as you know, life doesn’t always give us what we wish for, which is not to say that you and I cannot have a wonderful life together. So I ask you, Sophia, to let me give you the security you need. I have no other attachments, and as such it would be an honor for me to make you my wife.”
Sophia clasped his hand with all her might. He had proposed in the sort of practical way she should have expected from him. Devoid of passion but overflowing with endless fondness, he’d given her a better option than any woman in her position could have hoped for. It pained her to think he, too, might be walking away from the person he longed to spend the rest of his life with, but Sophia knew him well enough to understand he’d not do so unless he believed there was no other choice. To turn him down would be foolish. To suppose Jack would suddenly sweep her off her feet, more so.
And yet, marriage was not the sort of thing one ought to agree to on a whim. She needed time to clear her head – to think the matter through. “Will you let me sleep on it?”
He raised her hands to his lips and kissed them. “Of course.”
By four o’clock the following morning, Sophia decided that ‘sleeping on it’ was a funny turn of phrase indeed. She’d not slept a wink, but she had managed to make up her mind.
If Jack needed to be persuaded to give her a chance, then she didn’t want him. During his absence, she’d written him. Some might think it inappropriate for an unmarried woman to correspond with a bachelor, but the Fenmores had permitted it due to their longstanding friendship when she’d asked if it was alright. Jack, however, had not responded to any of her letters.
And Sophia had her pride. Chasing after a man who’d proven he had no interest in her was demeaning. She could do better and Edward was willing to give her exactly that – a comfortable life filled with friendship and affection.
And because of this - because she knew what she could expect from Edward and also because of how much she owed him and his parents - she pulled him aside immediately after breakfast and gave him her answer. “Yes, Edward. I will marry you.”
Comfortably seated in the library, Jack enjoyed a pre-dinner drink with the gentleman suitors who’d been invited to vie for his sisters’ hands. Lord, it was good to be back at Eastgate. He’d missed the sprawling estate much more than he’d realized. During his morning ride, he and his mount, Star, had savored a hard gallop, the chance to leap across fences and rivers, the ability to soar. Riding through Hyde Park was terribly dull by comparison.
Town also didn’t permit him to hunt. One couldn’t just shoot a duck swimming along the Serpentine and bring it home for supper. Tomorrow, however, he’d set out with the guests. They’d all expressed an interest in helping him catch a deer for the cook to prepare when he’d voiced the suggestion. The forest on the south side of the property would be an excellent spot for that. He knew it well, like the back of his hand. It was where he’d built his best forts as a child and also where he’d played his favorite games of hide and go seek with his sisters and the Fenmore children.
He paused on that thought as the memories flooded his brain, of laughter and mischief filling the air. Edward was the same age as he but had been the careful sort. If given the choice, he’d always preferred spending time with Jack’s sisters who’d been more reserved on account of their being raised as young ladies. Sophia, on the other hand, had been entirely different – spirited and free from the restraint so often placed on people who worried about their appearances.
Jack smiled and took a sip of his brandy. She’d disliked sitting still on a blanket and making daisy chains. Even pall-mall had appeared to bore her, which was likely why she always whacked the ball as hard as she could with no attempt at all to make it roll through the appointed arches. Perhaps this was why she’d sought him out? Because she’d recognized in him a kindred spirit? When given the chance, she’d bombarded him with questions and comments, proving herself to be more precocious than most children her age. As such, he’d never really considered her youth. Nor had he paid much attention to the woman she’d been transforming into.
Until his father brought it up.
Jack tightened his grip on his glass as that one particular conversation came rushing back. It was what had caused him not only to leave but to stay away. Lord help him, he’d been angry. And determined to make sure he’d never have to rely on his father for anything ever again – not even his bloody inheritance.
Another sip of brandy slid down his throat. The bastard had threatened to withhold every penny if Jack did something reckless, like marry a woman unfit to hold a title. As if he’d had any notion of marrying anyone. The fact that his father had made an issue of it was preposterous.
He glanced at the man with whom he’d agreed to be civil for his sisters’ sakes. They needed him now, but once they were married, Jack would go back to London where he could be free to indulge, much to his father’s frustration. Jack grinned. With his investments providing him a comfortable income, his father no longer had the power to sway him in any way. Which was precisely how Jack liked it.
Still, in spite of their differences, Jack had to admit he owed his father one debt of gratitude. He’d brought Sophia’s increased interest in him to his attention, offering Jack the chance to save her from an impossible dream by adding some much needed distance between them. Regrettably, the mixture of anger and frustration he’d experienced at the time had not led to the best sort of parting. In fact, his embarrassment over the words he’d spoken to her made him wary of running into her while he was here. But then again, it had been four years. Perhaps she’d forgotten?
“Shall we head on through to the parlor?” Papa inquired in a stiff voice. “It’s almost six o’clock. The ladies will be down soon.”
Jack stood, ready to do his duty regardless of the hostile air now swirling around him, and addressed the men nearest to him. “If you’ll please follow me. It’s time for us to greet Lady Turner and her daughters.” He fell into step beside his father and led the way, arriving in the front-most parlor immediately before his mother and sisters made their entrance.
Closing the distance, he kissed each of their cheeks. He then stepped between his sisters and began to introduce them to the five men who’d be staying at Eastgate for the next three weeks. “You’re already acquainted with the Earl of Cumberland, I believe. And this is Viscount Lambert… Mr. Madsen… Mr. Irving… and Mr. Dover.”
“Enchanted,” Mr. Dover murmured while gazing at Felicity in a manner that tempted Jack to hit him, never mind propriety or their friendship.
“It is my understanding that you are exceptional pianists,” Viscount Lambert said, his eyes fixed on Kaitlin.
“And horsewomen,” Mr. Irving added. “Perhaps we can go for a ride together tomorrow, if the weather permits.”
“I’ll come with you,” Jack grumbled, only to receive a glare of disapproval from Felicity.
Really?
He glanced at his parents, who gestured for him to make himself scarce and allow his sisters some freedom to interact with the guests. For a second, he considered ignoring the request, only to get distracted when the butler arrived. He wasn’t alone, but was escorting two people into the room and when he moved aside to give Jack a better view…
It was much like that one time when he’d landed on his arse in a puddle after tripping over a fallen tree branch.
Air whooshed from his lungs. His heart seemed to stumble. Because there she was, exactly as he remembered her and yet so very different.
Jack blinked. When he’d last seen her he’d become aware that she was maturing, growing up and turning into a woman. Apparently this transition had since been completed. There were curves now where there had been straight lines before. High cheekbones had replaced the plump features she’d had during adolescence. Even her dark blonde hair looked more vibrant, her lips a deeper shade of rose. And then her gaze swept toward him, her bright green eyes shimmering with a mixture of joy, familiarity, and something else he couldn’t quite place.
He started forward, drawn to her as if by some unseen force. Her smile deepened and his heart thumped hard against his chest.
“Sophia,” Felicity said, intercepting Jack’s path as she rushed to greet her friend. “I’m so glad you came.”
“I did say I would,” Sophia told her, and now Kaitlin had approached as well, blocking Sophia completely from Jack’s line of sight. He frowned, but continued his approach, undaunted.
“And Mr. Fenmore,” Felicity said. “I trust you are well?”
“Indeed,” Edward replied. “Thank you for inviting us.”
Jack reached the small group at the same time as his parents.
“Miss Fenmore,” Mama said. “And Mr. Fenmore. You’re most welcome.”
Papa seconded the sentiment and then it was Jack’s turn to offer his greetings. “It’s good to see you again, Edward.” He kept his gaze on his childhood friend for an extra second before allowing it to slide across to Sophia. “Miss Fenmore.”
He wanted to say something else – to offer a compliment or…something. But as his eyes locked with hers, all sensible thought disappeared, and he could not for the life of him form a coherent sentence. So he just stood there like an imbecile – the most famous flirt in London, a reputed rake, reduced to a blithering fool on account of a woman.
A tight smile was all he could manage.
Sophia broke the gaze, effectively cutting him loose and sending him reeling as she gave her full attention to everyone else. “We’re thrilled to be here. Especially since it gives us a chance to share our wonderful news with you directly.”
Jack frowned. Why was she speaking as if she and Edward were one singular unit?
“You see,” Sophia added with a glorious smile directed at Edward. “Mr. Fenmore has asked me to marry him, and I have accepted.”
Exclamations of joy mixed with congratulations and squeals of excitement ensued, the cacophonous sound churning the air until it became a roar in Jack’s ears. He stood as if paralyzed, not entirely certain of what he was feeling, though one distinct sensation did fill him, namely that of defeat.
“Come,” Mama said. “Let me introduce the two of you to the rest of our guests.”
Jack balled his hands into fists as Sophia and Edward moved off with his parents. He couldn’t breathe. The air entering his lungs didn’t seem to be working.
“Are you all right?” Kaitlin asked.
Somehow, in spite of the numbness, he managed a nod.
“You look a bit pale,” Felicity said.
Jack turned his head toward her. “I need a drink.”
“I’m so happy for Sophia and Edward,” Felicity said, ignoring his comment. “It’s about time they realized how perfect they are for each other.”
Jack clenched his jaw. He couldn’t wait to go hunting tomorrow. As of right now, he had an absurd need to shoot something while envisioning Edward’s head.
“I quite agree,” Kaitlin said as she and Felicity strolled away. “And winter weddings can be so romantic.”
Jack gnashed his teeth and turned to the sideboard. A tall glass of brandy was in order. Right now. He poured himself a good measure and downed it, then poured himself another. Heat swept through him, easing some of the tension in his muscles.
As if by instinct, he glanced toward Sophia and Edward. They were conversing with Mr. Madsen and Mr. Dover while Cumberland, Irving, and Lambert kept Kaitlin and Felicity company.
Jack frowned. He took another sip of his drink and pondered the strong reaction he’d had upon learning Sophia and Edward were going to wed. It had felt like a blow to his skull, as if the predictable world he was used to had come crashing down around him. It felt…wrong. Sophia and Edward. He shook his head. His gut strained as if it wished to revolt against an unfavorable food. They couldn’t be serious, could they?
And why the devil did he suddenly care so much about what Sophia decided to do with her life? What did it matter if she married Edward? It wasn’t as if he wanted her for himself. Was it?
Of course not.
He might appreciate how stunning she suddenly looked – could not ignore the fact that she had grown into the sort of woman he might have considered pursuing if he’d been in London and she’d been an unhappy wife or widow. Instead she was here, in Oxfordshire, embodying the very essence of virginal purity. Regardless of her situation, Sophia Fenmore was not the sort of woman a self-respecting man dallied with unless he meant to marry her. Which was something Jack could not consider. In spite of his argument with his father, he respected his duty toward the title and as such, had resigned himself to the idea of eventually doing what most men in his position did and marrying for convenience alone.
For the first time in four years however, this very thought left a bitter taste in his mouth. It lingered as he followed the party into the dining room some moments later. He surveyed the place cards and instantly groaned. Of course he’d been seated beside her. Why the hell wouldn’t he be?