On Sunday 24 August 1892, Maureen took her second trip outdoors in a month. ‘Oh, Ruby, I’m so excited, I can hardly keep a limb still!’ she laughed. ‘Last week a wander round the Saturday market, and now – oh!’
She clasped her hands to her face and stared into the mirror, her brown eyes sparkling as she watched Ruby’s every move. ‘That’s enough,’ she cried impatiently as her friend went on brushing her long brown hair. She couldn’t wait to get out into the fresh air and sunshine.
‘Stop moaning, and be patient,’ Ruby scolded kindly. Last week when they had gone to the market Maureen had insisted on having her hair pinned back, and had adamantly refused when Ruby asked if she could wash and brush it.
‘You’ve got such pretty hair,’ she had argued, but Maureen was so nervous about her first outing in a long time, she couldn’t wait another minute. When they arrived at the market, she was actually trembling from head to toe. Later, though, she had enjoyed her freedom and seen how, instead of staring at her as though she was a curiosity, folks really cared. Just as her mam and Ruby had said they would.
This morning it was Maureen herself who had suggested that Ruby should wash and brush her hair. ‘Make me look really pretty, Ruby,’ she ordered. And that was exactly what she had done. So now Maureen had to do as she was told and suffer for the end result.
‘Stop fidgeting! You’re not ready yet,’ Ruby ordered. Momentarily resting her hands on her friend’s narrow shoulders, she sighed. ‘Oh, Maureen, I want you to look wonderful. When we go out of this house and down the street, I want people to faint with admiration at the sight of you. I want them to whisper to each other and say, “Well, would you look at that! Whoever said Maureen Ackroyd was poorly must have come straight from a night on the booze. Why! The lass is lovely. She could turn any young man’s head.”’ Gently shaking those pathetic little shoulders, Ruby went on, ‘That’s what I want. For the whole world to know how really pretty you are.’
‘You’ll have a long wait then.’
‘I won’t, you know,’ Ruby retorted. Undeterred by Maureen’s cynical attitude, she continued to whisk the brush down her brown hair, feverishly trying to coax a shine into the long limp strands. You’ll be the most handsome girl in the street.’ She so wanted Maureen to look special. Though her friend had been declared well enough to take the odd outing, the long debilitating illness had left its mark. Her cheekbones were high and jutting, and her large eyes seemed unusually dark in that narrow pallid face. Her arms were twig-like, and her hair hung lifeless down her shoulders.
It was good of Cicely Banks to let me have that dress.’ Maureen’s gaze shifted to the wicker chair and the lovely emerald green dress that was draped over it. ‘It’s beautiful,’ she breathed. You did thank her for me, didn’t you, Ruby?’
‘What do you think?’ she answered. ‘Of course I thanked her.’
‘And those pretty shoes. Isn’t it strange how me and Cicely Banks have the same shoe size?’ The black patent leather shoes were dainty yet sturdy enough, with narrow cross-over ankle straps that fastened with a little pearl button. The heels were small but chunky.
‘Not really,’ Ruby said cautiously. ‘Plenty of ladies have a size five. She lowered her head so Maureen couldn’t see her blushing face. Ruby was ashamed because for the first time ever she had lied to her friend. Knowing she could never have persuaded Maureen to let her buy the shoes out of her own hard-earned savings, Ruby had let her believe that they were a present from Cicely. ‘To go with the dress,’ she’d fibbed, and they were accepted with gratitude.
On this glorious Sunday morning, she had been getting her friend ready for two hours. She had even ‘borrowed’ some of Cicely’s best shampoo, rubbing it into Maureen’s fine hair with painstaking care. This past twenty minutes and more she had brushed and brushed until her arms felt like lead weights and her shoulders ached all over. But she’d been determined, and now her determination was rewarded when a faint sheen began to creep in. A little more vigorous brushing, then she placed the brush on the dresser and picked up a pretty hair band which she slid over Maureen’s forehead and on to the sweep of hair, drawing it from the temples. She then turned Maureen slightly in the chair so that she could view the results of her handiwork. ‘See the shine?’ Ruby asked, smiling at the girl in the mirror. Her heart swelled with love when Maureen’s face lit up.
‘Oh, Ruby. It’s lovely!’ she gasped, her long thin fingers lovingly caressing the silky strands. ‘How did you make it shine so?’
Ruby grunted, rolled her eyes to heaven and back again. ‘Hard work, how do you think?’ she demanded with a chuckle. Her reward was an upturned face waiting for a kiss. Afterwards the two girls cuddled and laughed, and Maureen asked with a delicious little giggle. ‘Do you think I might catch myself a boyfriend?’
‘Two I shouldn’t wonder,’
‘And will they be handsome, do you think?’
‘So handsome it’s a crime.’
‘It’s no good you asking to share, because you’ll have to find your own.’
Ruby feigned astonishment. ‘Why, I wouldn’t dream of sharing.’
‘Good.’ Maureen waved her hand in the air, a haughty expression on her narrow face. ‘It’s time we were off. Hurry, girl. Fetch my carriage.’
Trying not to laugh, Ruby bent forward at the waist and bowed and scraped and was delightfully servile. ‘At once, madam,’ she said in a shaking voice, and the two of them collapsed in a helpless fit of laughter. Suddenly Maureen began coughing and gasping, and Ruby had quickly to run and fetch a glass of water from the jug on the bedside cabinet.
Startled into silence, she watched while Maureen took dainty little sips, catching her breath in between and smiling at her reassuringly. It was only a moment before Maureen had composed herself, but they were both subdued by the attack. Ruby sensed that her friend had been frightened more than she would say. She also knew from experience that Maureen wouldn’t thank her if she made a fuss, so instead she attempted to bring the smile back to that poor little face. ‘Shame on you, Maureen Ackroyd,’ she said. ‘You did that on purpose, didn’t you?’ Her voice was firm and accusing, but there was a little twinkle in her eye. ‘After I promised not to steal your fellow and all!’
Maureen took a deep breath and let it out slowly. Her smile was loving as she raised her eyes. Taking Ruby’s hand into her own, she murmured, ‘I’m so lucky to have a friend like you, Ruby. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without you.’
Too choked to answer, she just squeezed those long thin fingers and returned the smile. It was a moment before she said softly, ‘We’d better get a move on. Your mam and Johnny will be growing impatient.’ Her heart leaped at his name. But, as always, she pushed her emotions into the deepest recesses of her heart. When she compared that magnificent young fellow to the cowardly Luke, she was made to ask herself why she didn’t up and marry Johnny at the first opportunity.
Yet even as she asked herself that persistent question, Ruby knew what it was that kept her and Johnny apart. She only had to look at Maureen to know that her dreams of one day becoming rich and powerful must stay ever strong. If the Ackroyd family had money, Maureen might have had better medical care. Oh, the doctor who visited was a good man, and he cared deeply about his patients. But there was a limit to what he could do. Ruby had not forgotten about the centre in Switzerland where wealthier T.B. sufferers had found respite from that terrible illness.
And then there was her own mam, a woman with a stout heart, who carried her family through every trauma and hardship. A kind and good woman who deserved better.
Sometimes at night Ruby would lie in her bed and ruminate on her life, haunted by a horror of the future. It was fear that strengthened what had been in her for as long as she could remember: the daydreams, the wishing and the wanting – and the questions. They were always there, and so was the answer. Money and influence. These things alone could open doors that would otherwise stay closed against her forever.
Maureen’s excited voice interrupted her then. ‘Oh, Ruby. Won’t they be surprised to see me all dressed up, with my hair shining and everything?’
She nodded, putting her two hands one on either side of Maureen’s shoulders. When she felt the sharp bones there, shock rippled through her. ‘Let’s get you dressed,’ she suggested brightly. ‘Then we’ll give them a real treat.’
Going across the room she collected the dress and quickly returned to where Maureen was making a determined effort to stand up. Ruby was frantic when she saw how the girl’s pathetically thin limbs seemed to crumble beneath her. ‘No, no, sweetheart,’ she coaxed, her calm voice belying the panic inside her. ‘Just wait a minute. There’s no use wearing yourself out before we even start.’ She rolled the dress over her arm then, with her other supporting Maureen, she slid the hem of the dress over her head, gradually feeding the whole garment down until it sat snug to the waist. ‘Now then, let’s have you on your feet,’ she suggested. ‘But mind you lean on me,’ she warned.
It was a slow and painful procedure, and Maureen was so delicate that Ruby feared she would break in two. Now an accomplished needlewoman, Ruby had spent many a long hour altering Cicely’s dress and the fit was good, the clever folds disguising her reed-thin figure, while the colour fetched a glow to her face. The pretty garment had a white lace collar, a narrow waistband of the same material, and a flounce of white lace at the hem. It was perfectly lovely. The floral band that held her hair from her face drew attention from the pallor of her features. Altogether she looked delightful and Ruby was deeply proud.
Exhausted by her own efforts, Maureen gladly leaned her slight weight against Ruby. Soon the dress was fastened about her thin form, and Ruby eased her back into the chair while she did up the top buttons at the neck. ‘There!’ She pressed Maureen deeper into the chair and stood away to survey the finished creation. ‘You look so different,’ she said, her elfin face wreathed in a smile and the tears bright in her dark blue eyes. What a tonic it was to see her friend like this, pretty as a picture and so excited about the coming picnic in Corporation Park. ‘Oh, Maureen, just look at yourself,’ she urged. ‘Look in the mirror and see how lovely you are.’
Maureen turned her head and surveyed her own image. Her eyes popped open in astonishment. She didn’t speak. She just stared and stared, and then dropped her head on to her chest, her eyes closed and her hands folded together on her lap. At first Ruby feared she was crying, but a glance in the mirror told her different.
‘Well, that’s a fine thank you!’ she chided good-humouredly. She sensed it was all too much for Maureen, and she was saddened. ‘You don’t like my handiwork, is that it?’ she asked, laying her hand on the girl’s shoulder. When there came no answer, only a shuddering beneath her touch, Ruby promised in a brighter voice, ‘It’s going to be a wonderful day, Maureen. A day to remember.’
Moved by Ruby’s enthusiasm, she looked up then. ‘It’s such a pity there won’t be many more, isn’t it?’ she murmured. There was no self-pity, only painful resignation.
Ruby was horrified. ‘I don’t know what you mean,’ she said, gently shaking the shoulders. ‘And I won’t listen to you when you talk like that.’
‘You do know what I mean,’ Maureen insisted. ‘Everyone knows I won’t make old bones.’
‘Who knows?’
‘Everyone.’
‘They’ve said that to you, have they?’
‘No. But I know what they’re thinking.’
‘Oh, I see. So now you’re a mind-reader, are you?’ Ruby had to shake off this mood that had settled on her. It wasn’t often the girl let anyone see beneath that veneer of bravado. Suddenly though this special occasion had touched her deep enough to expose her inner thoughts. ‘Has the doctor said anything about you not making old bones?’ she demanded.
‘No.’
Your mother? Johnny? Perhaps your dad?’ She was relentless.
No. Maureen shook her head. Her eyes were brighter and she was beginning to have doubts.
‘In fact, didn’t the doctor say he was extremely pleased with your progress?’
‘Hmh.’ It was true. He had.
There you are then, Miss Know-all. Stop feeling sorry for yourself, and sit still while I fetch Johnny.’
‘You’re a bully.’
Happen I am,’ Ruby admitted, thankful that she had coaxed Maureen into a lighter frame of mind. ‘But I’ll not have you say such things… won’t make old bones indeed! Only the good Lord can say who goes and who stays, and don’t you ever forget that. What! I’ve never had a day’s real illness, but I could walk out the door right now and get knocked down by the milkman’s horse.’
Maureen laughed out loud. ‘Not at the speed our milkman’s old horse goes,’ she spluttered.
Ruby laughed too. ‘Away with you,’ she said gaily. ‘I’m off to fetch Johnny, so while I’m gone you could pinch your cheeks a few times to bring up the roses, eh?’ Halfway across the room she glanced back to see Maureen doing just that. ‘Shan’t be long,’ she promised, leaving the room and the door wide open.
Downstairs in the back parlour, Johnny was pacing the floor. He was more excited than his sister at the prospect of spending the day with Ruby. ‘For goodness’ sake, will you sit down?’ his mother groaned. ‘You’re making me nervous.’
‘Sorry, Mam,’ he answered, flinging himself into the nearest chair. ‘What in God’s name are they doing up there?’ he wanted to know.
‘Woman’s business,’ came the coy reply. But it wasn’t his mother who spoke. It was Ruby. Bouncing into the room and lighting it with her presence, she smiled proudly from one to the other. ‘Wait ’til you see the result,’ she told them. Then to Johnny, who had sprung from his chair at her appearance, she said warmly, ‘You won’t recognise your sister.’
‘She’s ready then?’
Ruby nodded. For the briefest moment she had been stunned by Johnny’s good looks. When she arrived that morning, he was nowhere to be seen. ‘Gone to find his father,’ Mrs Ackroyd explained. ‘But he’ll be back in time to take you and Maureen to the park.’
Now here he was, looking amazingly handsome in his dark brown cords and light blue shirt. This was open at the neck and little clusters of dark hair peeped through. In a minute he was across the room and standing over her, his black eyes shining down on her. ‘You’ve been like a tonic to our Maureen,’ he murmured. ‘And I don’t know how to thank you.’ He instinctively put his hand on her shoulder, sending little thrills down her back.
‘She’s my friend,’ Ruby replied simply.
‘He’s right though.’ They both looked up at Mrs Ackroyd’s quiet voice. ‘You’ve been a godsend to her. Bless you for that.’ Seeming to suppress her emotions, she took a deep breath then told Ruby, ‘We shall have to make sure she’s wrapped up warm. I know it’s a glorious day but she’s got no fat on her. I don’t want her catching a chill.’
Johnny answered, ‘Don’t worry, Mam. We’ll take great care of her, you know that.’
‘Aye, lad.’ Her smile was tempered by the knowledge that Maureen couldn’t get to the park on her own two feet. ‘I know you will.’ She turned her head and gazed at the figure of her husband, prostrate on the settee, his mouth wide open, emitting deep rumbling snores that told her he would be unconscious for most of the day. ‘It’s a shame your father can’t see the lass on her way, and her all done up to look pretty.’
‘Not to worry, Mam,’ Johnny said. ‘Happen he’ll see her when we get back.’ He looked at his father and his feelings were a blend of disgust and compassion. ‘I wish you’d let me take him to his bed, Mam,’ he told her. He still had his hand on Ruby’s shoulder and she made no move, even though she sensed the undercurrent of emotion in this little parlour. She had seen Johnny’s father stretched out on the settee, but tried to keep her gaze averted. The whole street knew of Mrs Ackroyd’s burden where he was concerned, and that was on top of her heartache for Maureen. They knew also that if it wasn’t for the love and strength of her son, she would likely have given up long ago.
‘You’re right, son,’ she conceded. ‘It’s just that – well, I thought if he was down here with me, I could bring him round and we could talk.’ She looked at her husband again, then shook her head and sighed. ‘He reeks of booze, but at least he’s come to no real harm.’ She glanced at Ruby. ‘Never wed a drinker,’ she warned, and behind the light-hearted comment was a well of sadness. She laughed then, saying in a round warm voice, ‘He’s not a bad man really, and I can’t help but love him.’
‘We all love him, Mam,’ Johnny answered. He didn’t mind Ruby being here. In his heart he knew she understood. ‘I’ll take him to his bed then, eh?’ he asked his mother.
‘Aye. Take him up, and I’ll keep an eye on him best I can,’ she agreed.
Johnny crossed the room and lifted his father into his arms with such ease the man might have been a child. Without another word he carried him upstairs with Ruby following, her thoughts taken up entirely with what she had seen and heard. Mrs Ackroyd’s warning echoed inside her head. ‘Never wed a drinker’, she had said. She might as well have added, ‘Never wed into poverty’, because to Ruby’s mind that was just as much of a life sentence.
At the top of the stairs, Johnny stopped. ‘Ruby, would you please open the door for me?’ He stepped back on the confined landing while she pushed open the door. ‘Thanks,’ he muttered turning sideways to squeeze his awkward burden in through the narrow opening. ‘Give me a minute,’ he winked at her, ‘then you can show me this vision of loveliness you’ve been creating.’
Just to have Ruby in this house was enough to turn his heart over. But to be standing so close and not able to do anything about it, was sheer purgatory.
‘I’ll wait here for you,’ she assured him. If she needed a test of Johnny’s worth, she had witnessed it here today. But her ambitions were not weakened. His goodness and strength only made it that much harder for her to say no to him.
Soon enough they were in Maureen’s room, and Johnny was lost for words as he looked on the beauty that was his sister. In that green dress, with her long hair brushed to a deep shine and her eyes glowing, she seemed like a stranger to him.
‘Well? What do you think?’ Maureen was impatient to hear.
He went to her then and laughingly swept her into his arms, ‘If I tell you what I think, it’ll only make you swell-headed,’ he teased.
‘No, it won’t,’ she complained, breathless with laughter when he swung her round against his chest. ‘Do you think I look lovely? Do you?’ She beat at him with her small fists until he stopped.
For a long moment he stared down at her, thinking how like a feather she was in his arms. ‘You’ll have all the fellas sighing after you,’ he said gently. ‘You do look lovely, our Maureen.’
‘She’s a devil to keep still though,’ Ruby chipped in. The picture before her eyes stirred her heart. These two had a very special love between them. And for no reason she could fathom, Ruby suddenly felt lonely. ‘Your mam says you’re to put your shawl on,’ she told Maureen. ‘She doesn’t want you catching a chill.’ To Johnny she gave the instruction, ‘Sit her down in the chair. She still hasn’t got her shoes on.’ By the time she had collected the shoes, Maureen was seated. All the time she was strapping them to Maureen’s feet, Ruby felt Johnny’s eyes on her.
Snapping shut the last button on the ankle-strap, she clambered to her feet, deliberately keeping her eyes from Johnny’s. ‘If you can take Maureen downstairs and settle her into the bath-chair, I’ll run along home and make sure Dolly’s ready,’ she suggested. And even when he appeared beside her to gather Maureen into his arms, Ruby still dared not look at him.
Having carried his father up the stairs, Johnny now carried his sister down. This time Ruby insisted on going ahead. With every step she knew he was watching her, loving her with all his heart. A peculiar silence settled over them. They were each lost in their own thoughts; Johnny thinking of Ruby, Ruby thinking of Johnny, and Maureen deeply regretting Ruby’s impossible dreams that kept these two apart. She believed Ruby to be wrong. Yet she had given her word, and she would not betray Ruby’s confidence. Besides, if she was to tell Johnny why Ruby couldn’t be persuaded to be his sweetheart, it would only hurt him. He would be made to feel inadequate and, with Ruby so adamant, there would be nothing worthwhile to be gained by it. So many times she and Ruby had talked about it, and each time Maureen was more convinced than ever that Ruby was making a rod for her own back. Yet nothing she could say would make her see that. ‘I will make something of myself you’ll see!’ was her answer. And Maureen despaired.
Ruby left the delighted Mrs Ackroyd fussing over her daughter while Johnny went to the cellar and brought up the big old bath-chair which Thomas had found in the back of the Arnolds’ stables. ‘Take it home with you, lad,’ he’d told Johnny with foresight. ‘When the time comes for your sister to see the world this ’ere chair will do a good turn. It belonged to Mr Arnold’s mother, but since she’s been gone to her maker these many years, she ain’t got no use for it now.’
When consulted, Oliver Arnold made the same observation. Later that same evening, Johnny was refused a place on the tram because of the cumbersome vehicle, so undeterred, pushed it all the way home into Blackburn. Maureen was thrilled when she saw it, and her mam was convinced that because of that old bath-chair her daughter had suddenly gained a new lease of life.
The minute Ruby opened the front door, the noise flew up the passage to greet her. The twins were the loudest as they yelled at Lenny to, ‘Stop messing with our Snap cards!’ Then came the sound of Lenny’s unkind voice, ‘And if I don’t, who’s gonna make me, eh?’ Now the baby was crying, and Lizzie’s voice sailed above it all: ‘So help me I’ll swing for the lot of you if you don’t behave yourselves!’
No sooner had Ruby pushed open the parlour door than Dolly rushed to grab hold of her hand. ‘Oh, Ruby, I thought you weren’t coming for me,’ she cried, looking up adoringly at her big sister.
‘I promised, didn’t I?’ Ruby reminded her. All was quiet now as everyone’s eyes turned to look at her.
‘Well, at least it’ll be one less to aggravate me when you take Dolly,’ Lizzie sighed. She had the bawling infant in her arms and was rocking it from side to side. ‘It’s been bedlam in here. Any minute now I’m throwing this lot out onto the street,’ she threatened. When the child screamed louder, she walked it into the scullery, all the while cooing at it and patting its back to fetch up the wind.
Ruby was angry. Striding across the room to the table where the boys were seated, she confronted Lenny. ‘Instead of being a nuisance, why don’t you give our mam a hand?’ she demanded. ‘You’re the oldest after me.’
Slicing his arm across the table, Lenny sent the playing cards flying, causing the twins to scramble down after them. ‘Oh, dearie me, our Ruby,’ he sneered. ‘Now see what you made me do.’ He grinned at her, cocking his head to one side and retorting in a cunning voice, ‘So you think I should help our mam, eh? And how should I do that? Go out and shake the mats? Wash the dirty dishes? Take the awful twins out to play?’ The smile fell from his face. ‘That’s all women’s work.’ He was enjoying taunting her. ‘Or d’you think I should feed the babby?’ He laughed, a harsh cruel sound that shocked her to the core. ‘I’d have a job, wouldn’t I, eh? ’Specially as I ain’t got no withered wet titties like its mammy.’
He sniggered, glancing from one astonished face to the other, searching for a crumb of appreciation. But he yelped like a dog when all he got was a swipe across the face.
‘Don’t be so smutty,’ Ruby warned him in a furious voice. ‘You’d think twice about talking like that if our dad wasn’t abed.’
Lenny glared at her, his short stubby fingers caressing his cheek. Ruby had hit him so hard that her fingers had left an imprint. ‘Don’t you ever hit me again,’ he growled, ‘Or you’ll be sorry.’
For a long disturbing moment they glared at each other. Ruby sensed that he was itching to hit her back, and all she wanted was an opportunity to fetch him another across that big vindictive mouth. ‘Why don’t you go for me?’ she taunted. ‘And it’ll be you who’s sorry.’ She had never been so incensed.
When Lizzie returned from the kitchen with a quieter babby she was mortified to see her two eldest squaring up to each other. ‘What’s going on ’ere?’ she demanded, quickly putting the child into its makeshift cot and coming to stand, arms folded, between her son and Ruby. ‘Come on. Out with it!’ she snapped.
She continued to stare, even when the twins cried out in unison, telling her how Lenny had said something bad and Ruby had slapped his face. ‘I didn’t ask you,’ she returned sharply. One stony glare silenced them.
Afterwards she faced her son, her pretty brown eyes hard as glass. She knew he was the main culprit. He must have been more wicked than usual because she could not recall Ruby ever lifting her hand to anyone before. ‘What have you got to say for yourself?’ she demanded. He remained silent, so she turned to Ruby. ‘What did he say?’ she wanted to know. ‘What’s this all about?’ ‘Leave it, Mam. I don’t think he meant it.’ Ruby bitterly regretted having slapped him.
Lenny jumped up from his seat, shouting, ‘I did mean it! And I meant what I said about her too.’ He poked a stiff finger at Ruby. ‘If she ever hits me again, she’ll be sorry, that’s all.’
Lizzie turned on him. ‘GET TO YOUR BED!’ she said through her teeth. When he made no move, she pinched his ear-lobe between her finger and thumb, and physically propelled him across the room. At the open door, she thrust him out into the passageway. ‘And don’t come down ’til I tell yer.’ She waited there, listening to his footsteps deliberately thumping up each step. He could be heard cursing and moaning until at last there came an almighty bang when he shut the bedroom door. ‘The little sod!’
Lizzie swung round to face the others, an expression of concern on her face. ‘That’ll wake your dad, and Lord knows he needs his sleep after working the extra shift.’
Together with her mam and the twins, and little Dolly clinging to her arm, Ruby listened. Sure enough, the muffled sounds coming from overhead told her that Lizzie was right, ‘Oh, Mam. What gets into our Lenny?’ she asked.
Lizzie shrugged her shoulders. ‘I’m beggared if I know, lass. But I’ll tell yer this… if he don’t soon mend his ways, I’m asking your dad to come down real hard on him.’
Ralph had something to say about that. ‘Dad won’t do nowt,’ he said sullenly. ‘’Cause Lenny’s his favourite.’
Lizzie came and fondly tousled his hair. ‘Stuff and nonsense!’ she declared. ‘There ain’t no favourites in this house, my lad.’ It seemed to appease him. But deep down Lizzie knew he was right. Lenny was his Dad’s favourite. He’d been allowed to get away with murder since the day he was born. And this was the end result, she thought sadly.
Lizzie looked at Ruby, and she was made to remember how she herself had committed the very same sin where her eldest child was concerned; happen because of her own guilty secret, and the fact that the lass had been deceived about her true father. All the same, Ruby and Lenny were two very different people, and Lizzie silently thanked the Lord for that darling lass. ‘Don’t let him spoil yer picnic,’ she pleaded. ‘Go off and enjoy yerselves, luv.’ She motioned towards the scullery. ‘You’ve made a lovely basket. The sun’s shining, and your friend’ll be wondering where you’ve got to. Off with you. And mind how you go, eh?’
For the first time Frank piped up, his eyes big and round as he looked at Ruby. ‘Lenny’s been at your basket, Ruby. He offered us some, but we said no, didn’t we Ralph?’ he appealed to his brother, who was pretending not to have heard.
‘What!’ Lizzie hurried towards the scullery door. ‘If he’s ruined your basket, I’ll flay his arse ’til he can’t sit down!’ she cried.
‘I’ll see.’ Ruby brushed past her mam, and going swiftly to the corner where she had left the basket, lifted one corner of the lid and peered in. She’d bought the strong wicker basket from the market especially for today. The pretty blue frilled cover was two pence extra.
‘Has he ruined it? Has he?’ Lizzie was hovering, making an effort to see into the basket. ‘You bought them things with your own hard-earned spending money, and he’d better not have interfered with it.’
Ruby put on her brightest smile and swung the basket on to her arm. ‘It’s all right, Mam. Nobody’s touched it,’ she lied.
Lizzie shook her head, but her whole face was bathed in relief. ‘I’m glad,’ she admitted. ‘I don’t hold with smacking the childer, you know that, lass.’ Then she recalled how Lenny had been insolent with her just now, and knew the others were listening from the parlour. Her face hardened a little and she raised her voice so they could hear. ‘That don’t mean to say the buggers won’t get a tanning if they deserve it, though.’ She winked at Ruby who had to hide her smiles because she was in full view of young Ralph who too often viewed the rebellious Lenny as his idol.
‘Are you going to be all right, Mam?’ Ruby felt guilty at leaving her to cope with the family, especially when baby Lottie was playing up.
‘Give over,’ Lizzie chided. ‘Yer not telling me I can’t manage four childer are yer?’ She hugged her daughter, saying with a wink, ‘Go on with yer. What meks yer think I can’t do without yer, eh?’
She appreciated Ruby’s concern, and if it was any other time she might have asked the lass to stay behind and give her a hand. But Lizzie knew how much Ruby had looked forward to this picnic with Maureen. ‘Thanks for taking Dolly,’ she said, directing a smile at the younger girl. ‘That’s one less mischief-maker. And anyway, your dad will be down now. He’ll keep the buggers in their place, that he will.’
She would have talked a little while longer but Lottie began crying again, her lusty uplifted voice piercing the air. Throwing her arms above her head in frustration, Lizzie turned tail to run back down the passage, crying out as she went, ‘Enjoy yerselves. And don’t be too late back now.’
They made a fetching sight as they went along the Preston New Road and up towards Corporation Park. Johnny was pushing the heavy bath-chair, with Ruby strolling along on one side and Dolly running to keep up on the other. Maureen was like a child, filled with wonder at everything she saw; each time a carriage went by she would clap her hands with excitement and, stretching her neck to see, would follow the graceful ensemble until it was out of sight.
As they turned in through the great entrance of Corporation Park, a genteel couple strolled by. Maureen gasped at the exquisite finery the young lady was wearing; a cream-coloured dress with huge frilly flounces, and a glamorous pink bonnet decorated with extravagant silk roses. She was carrying the daintiest parasol, and strutting alongside at her white booted feet was a tiny little dog with a pretty pink bow round its collar. ‘Oh, look, Ruby!’ she gasped. Realising she was the centre of attention, the young lady smiled sweetly and her handsome companion doffed his hat with a sweep of his well-tailored arm.
‘She’s not as pretty as you,’ Ruby whispered in Maureen’s ear, and the well-meant compliment brought a smile to her face.
As usual on a Sunday morning the Park was busy, with couples and families and well-behaved children all enjoying this beautiful place. The Park was one of the finest in Lancashire with fountains and cliffs, flowerbeds and shrubberies, narrow walkways and wide meandering avenues, all overhung with spreading boughs heavy with blossom. There was even a lake, populated by ducks and frequented by each and every one who sought refuge in this delightful oasis.
It was incredible but true that here the air smelled sweet and fresh, when only twenty minutes’ walk away the atmosphere was choked and sooty, the smoke from the mills leaving its grime and odour on every house, street and thoroughfare in Blackburn.
The happy little party carried on, up to the lake and the lawns beyond. Nearby the great conservatories housed all manner of exotic and heavenly plants. ‘Can we go in there? Can we?’ Dolly was beside herself. This was the third time Ruby had brought her here, and each time was a new adventure.
‘In a little while, maybe,’ she answered. She was more concerned that Maureen was all right. It was a steep climb to this spot, and though she had been pushed in her bath-chair all the way, the sun was beating down and there was no breeze to relieve the heat.
‘Aw, Ruby. Can’t I go now?’ Tugging at Ruby’s skirt, Dolly was insistent.
Securing the brakes on the chair, and seeing how Ruby was attending to his sister, Johnny swung the girl into his arms, ‘No. You can’t go now,’ he laughed. ‘We’ll all go together like Ruby says, in a little while. But first we’re hungry and thirsty, so we’ll have our lunch first. What d’you say to that?’ He tickled her ribs and she squealed with delight. When he put her on her feet, she fled to Ruby and hid behind her skirt. She didn’t see the affectionate look that passed between Ruby and Johnny. She only knew there was something very special about today, and she loved Johnny almost as much as she loved her sister. She didn’t know Maureen very well, but she liked her all the same. She thought Maureen was pretty, and she said so. Thrilled, Maureen returned the compliment.
It was the hottest August Ruby could remember. Maureen threatened to take off her shawl, but Johnny dissuaded her. ‘You know what Mam said… you’re to keep the shawl on so you don’t catch a chill.’ When she complained that she was too warm, he pushed her and the bath-chair out of the sun, beneath an aged willow whose branches dipped to the ground. From here she could see everything. A short distance away the lake shimmered and sparkled in the bright sunshine, and the whole panorama lay before her.
‘How’s that?’ he asked.
‘It’s wonderful,’ she whispered in awe. Satisfied, he returned to help Ruby who was setting out the picnic nearby.
Frank was right. Lenny had raided the contents of Ruby’s precious basket. There was an apple missing, together with a small pork pie, and he’d taken a huge bite out of one of the cheese butties; Ruby surreptitiously hid this one in the basket so it couldn’t be seen. Fortunately, Maureen’s mother had packed a parcel containing some tit-bits and four slices of home-made fruit cake. Johnny laid them out on the tablecloth beside Ruby’s generous offering. In addition to Mrs Ackroyd’s contribution there was an abundance of cheese butties, four dark ripe plums, an orange each, four fat round muffins, and a tiny earthenware jar of raspberry preserve. There was also a stone bottle of sarsaparilla, and a fleshy chicken wing for Johnny.
‘A spread fit for a king,’ he told her. ‘You must have saved weeks to pay for it.’ His smile became a dark brooding gaze. ‘You’re not only beautiful but a real home-maker,’ he murmured, and she blushed to the roots of her hair.
Still blushing, she kept her gaze averted while taking both crockery and cutlery out of the basket. ‘Mam helped me with the cheese butties,’ she admitted.
‘I’m hungry,’ wailed Dolly, who had eagerly helped to unpack the basket and now couldn’t contain her appetite any longer.
‘You’ll have to wait,’ Ruby scolded when the girl tried to take a muffin.
Seeing the disappointed look on her face, Johnny moaned, ‘And I’m hungry.’ But when Ruby glanced up to see his mischievous expression, she knew he meant something else entirely, and she had to laugh.
The lunch was a real treat. Johnny collected his sister out of her chair and, much to her delight, took off her shawl and asked Dolly to spread it on the ground for her to sit on. Both Ruby and Johnny kept a close watch on Maureen; the first sign that she was cold and she would be wrapped in her shawl whether she liked it or not.
As it happened, Maureen did not grow cold. The heat of the August sun shone down and kindly warmed them all. Ruby was thrilled to see that Maureen actually had the faintest tinge of roses in her cheeks. Everyone enjoyed their lunch, and after they had each partaken of a cup of sarsaparilla, it was time to clear away. ‘I want the lavatory,’ Dolly was moaning again. Johnny laughed out loud and suggested they should walk up towards the conservatories. Ruby knew it was his polite way of telling Dolly that there were lavatories there.
Afterwards, they strolled along the pretty walkways, up hill and down, until they came to some flat land. ‘Let’s stay here awhile,’ Ruby said. Like the others she was reluctant to go home yet. ‘It’s so lovely here.’ Her sparkling eyes scanned the horizon as she spoke. To the left of them were the high raised gardens spilling over with blooms, and over to the right was an expanse of green lush lawn, stretching as far as the eye could see. Shading her face with her hand, she looked in every direction. It was breathtaking.
When both Johnny and Maureen gladly agreed to rest here for a time, Dolly complained, ‘I wanted to push Maureen for a while.’ Looking at Johnny, she sternly reminded him, ‘You said I could.’
Maureen interrupted, telling the girl affectionately, ‘Johnny and Ruby can stay here if they like.’ She had a feeling they might want to spend a few minutes together. ‘If you go very slowly and don’t tip me out, I might let you take me along that little path.’ She pointed to where the footpath curved in towards the flowerbeds. ‘We can sit on that bench awhile and watch the swans through the railings.’ They had come the whole way round the lake and were now on the other side.
Dolly was ecstatic, but Ruby wasn’t so sure. ‘You’re only little, Dolly,’ she warned. ‘When Johnny said you could push Maureen, he didn’t mean on your own.’
Maureen argued, ‘It’s only a short way, and we’ll be in sight all the time.’ She appealed to her brother, ‘It’s all right, isn’t it Johnny?’
Like Ruby, he was reluctant. ‘I don’t know, Sis…’
Maureen was insistent. ‘The chair can’t tip over, not on flat ground, and you did promise Dolly she could push me.’
‘You’re a pair of bullies,’ he said warmly. He looked at Dolly, who was patiently waiting with her fingers wrapped round the handle of the chair. She was a sturdy child, big for her age, and very sensible. ‘All right then,’ he conceded. ‘But only a short way.’ He motioned to the chestnut tree. ‘As far as there and then back again. All right?’ He watched them go, satisfying himself that they would be safe. ‘What chance do I stand against two women,’ he laughed then, coming to sit on the grass beside Ruby.
‘They’ll be fine,’ she assured him, adding with a little smile, ‘I think Maureen wanted us to have a few minutes together.’ ‘Sensible woman.’ There was a pause then he asked, ‘Will you tell me something, Ruby?’ Suddenly his voice had a serious ring to it.’
‘What is it?’ She shielded her eyes from the sun as she turned to look at him, his expression equally serious.
He seemed embarrassed. ‘I haven’t said anything before because I know it’s none of my business.’ Even now the memory shocked and infuriated him.
‘Oh?’ Ruby was intrigued. She was also a little afraid.
His gaze was dark and penetrating as he told her in a low firm voice, ‘I saw you… that night at the Bankses’ dance. I saw you there.’ He watched her eyes turn down towards the grass, and knew she was ashamed. ‘Why did you do it, Ruby? What in God’s name made you do it?’
‘Were you spying on me?’ She raised her eyes then and boldly looked him in the face.
He shook his head. ‘No, I would never do such a thing,’ he explained. ‘Thomas was ill so I was obliged to drive the carriage that night. It was chilly out there, and I was impatient to be gone. All I did was glance in the window to see if the party was winding up, that’s all.’ He laughed scornfully. ‘I never dreamed that you were there, dressed like a lady and mingling as though you belonged.’ He shook his head. He still hadn’t got over the shock. ‘Laughing and dancing with that scum Luke Arnold. I couldn’t believe my own eyes!’
‘You had no right looking in the window.’
‘And you had no right being there like that.’
‘You’re not my keeper, Johnny Ackroyd, and don’t ever forget that.’ At first Ruby had been alarmed and a little ashamed. Now, though, her anger was rising. ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’
‘I don’t suppose you’ve told anyone what you did?’
‘No, I haven’t.’ She tossed her head defiantly. ‘I suppose you can’t wait to tell?’ Even as the unkind words fell from her lips she regretted them. Johnny wasn’t like that, and she knew it. All the same, she was disturbed by the fact that he knew about her little deception.
‘Aw, Ruby… RUBY!’ He looked away, so frustrated he could have shaken her. ‘Don’t you think if I was going to tell, I would have done it by now? After all, I’ve had plenty of time, haven’t I?’ he reminded her fiercely.
‘I know,’ she admitted. ‘I’m sorry.’
He looked at her then, a warm forgiving smile breaking over his handsome features. ‘Won’t you tell me why you did it, Ruby?’
‘It was a prank.’
‘A very dangerous prank.’
‘I don’t want to talk about it.’
He didn’t answer. Instead he studied her a moment longer while she stared down, twiddling a piece of grass between her fingers. He knew her when she was in this mood. There was no use pursuing the matter. One thing he had to ask though. ‘Does Luke Arnold mean anything to you?’
He was taken aback by the vehemence of her reply.
‘I loathe him!’ She wound the blade of grass round her fingers and broke it. ‘You were wrong if you thought I was enjoying dancing with him. It was for Cicely. She’s the one who’s taken in by him.’ Suddenly afraid that she had said too much already, Ruby warned, ‘That’s all I’m going to say. It was a prank, and that’s an end to it.’
‘He’s a bad lot.’
‘You don’t have to tell me that. I know it already.’ She was losing control and it showed in her voice. ‘Now… can we leave it alone?’
‘If that’s what you want.’
‘It is.’
There was an awkwardness between them now, and she deeply regretted that. He was right to warn her against Luke, and she should be grateful. Yet all she felt was irritation that he had seen her that night.
‘I shouldn’t have said anything.’ He still felt the urge to shake her though.
She looked up and smiled at him. The subject was closed, and the day mustn’t be spoiled because of it. Heartened, she turned her eyes to the sky, watching the small white clouds bumping into each other. A pleasant breeze was beginning to rustle the air. ‘It is lovely here, isn’t it?’ she murmured. The air between them was clear now, and she was glad.
‘Yes. It is lovely,’ he agreed softly, glancing sideways at her. ‘But only because you’re here with me.’ He sensed that if she could turn the clock back, she would change the events of that night and was grateful for that at least.
She looked at him then, and when he bent towards her and kissed her lightly on the mouth, made no resistance. In fact, it gave her a delicious thrill. Even with the heat of the sun on her face, she was trembling. In her heart she was afraid, desperately afraid that her own emotions might overwhelm her.
When he went to kiss her again, she deliberately turned away and looked over to where the other two were going at a snail’s pace along the footpath. ‘It’s so good to see Maureen out and about,’ she said. She wanted him to kiss her. Wanted him to hold her in his arms. But it wouldn’t be fair. Not to him and not to her. ‘What are you afraid of?’ he asked.
‘I’m afraid of nothing.’
‘You’re afraid of me… afraid of letting me love you,’ he insisted. ‘Why?’
‘I’m not ready for love.’
‘Don’t lie to me, Ruby.’
‘And don’t you tell me how I feel,’ she retorted. ‘Love can’t happen between you and me. Somewhere there’s a girl waiting just for you. It isn’t me, that’s all I’m saying.’ In a frantic attempt to remove herself from his dark quizzical gaze, she clambered to her knees and pointed to Maureen and Dolly, ‘Look,’ she cried, ‘Dolly got her there safely. We were worrying over nothing.’ He didn’t reply. There was a moment of unbearable silence as he continued to gaze at her while she kept her eyes on the two girls.
When he spoke it was with great tenderness. ‘Happen you don’t love me, Ruby. Happen you do. I don’t know. You blow hot and cold so I never can tell. But this much I do know, there’ll never be any other woman for me.’ Each word touched her heart and turned it over. ‘If I have to wait forever, I’ll wait for you.’
The sincerity of his quiet voice was more than she could bear. ‘Don’t, Johnny,’ she pleaded softly, ‘I’m not the one for you. You’re a good man, and you’ll make a fine husband. Don’t waste yourself on me. I’m not worth it.’
His smile was sad, but his voice was resolute. ‘I meant what I said. There’ll never be anyone else but you, Ruby.’
For some inexplicable reason, she wanted to cry. The tears clogged in her throat and hovered in her dark blue eyes. She tried to choke them back, but they brimmed over to tremble on the long sweeping lashes. There was so much she wanted to say, but it wouldn’t be said. Instead she murmured lamely, ‘It’s time we were making for home.’ He didn’t argue. He had opened his heart to her. It was enough.
All the way to the main gates, Dolly and Maureen chatted and laughed. Johnny pushed the bath-chair while Ruby walked alongside. In spite of their emotional exchange, there was a strange contentment between them. Each knew the other’s thoughts. There was no need for words. Not now. Ruby wanted Johnny, yet she didn’t. She loved him, yet she didn’t. All she knew for certain was that if she never saw him again, it would be a great sadness to her. But she must never tell him that. She had things to do with her life, and though she might regret it, Johnny was not part of it.
As they came out of the great gates, his attention was caught by the carriage which had just pulled up. He recognised it as belonging to the Arnold family. Sure enough, the door was flung open and out stepped a familiar figure, a tall thin fellow with a pale narrow face and pencil-slim moustache. ‘Well, well!’ He was visibly surprised, but not pleased.
Ruby had seen the look on Johnny’s face and was curious. ‘Do you know him?’ she asked, looking towards the carriage and thinking she too had seen the young man somewhere.
Nodding, Johnny told her in a low voice, ‘That’s Tony Hargreaves, the son of a wealthy mine-owner. According to Thomas, he and his family live in a great mansion in Cornwall.’ He glanced down at her. ‘You know he and Teresa married?’ He had celebrated the occasion for two reasons. First, he was downright ashamed because he’d made love to her that night when he had seen Ruby, and second, he was grateful that she would be moving so far away. Like Ruby he too had a secret. Which meant he had no right to judge her.
The young man stood by the carriage door, holding out his hand to the emerging lady. Ruby gasped when she saw that it was Teresa Arnold, looking splendid in a pale blue outfit, her hair piled up in coils and partly covered with a small veiled hat. Ruby’s attention was caught by the hat, because Cicely had one very similar. It was her favourite and Ruby had mended it many times.
‘I always wondered why they got wed in such a great hurry,’ she told Johnny. Almost as though in answer, a second young lady appeared, carrying an infant in her arms. By the uniform she was wearing, it was obvious to Ruby that the woman was the child’s nanny. This was confirmed when the driver of the carriage produced a perambulator from the rear and, after placing the child into it, the young woman proceeded to push the vehicle along the path, keeping a pace or two behind her employers.
‘They got wed quickly because they love each other,’ Maureen remarked innocently. Dolly looked on with interest.
‘I expect so,’ Ruby replied. At the same time she recalled how some of the women down Fisher Street had talked about the ‘grand wedding’. It was common gossip from one end of the street to the other that Teresa Arnold had been with child when her father rushed her into marriage with that eligible young man. Still, she thought wryly, it wasn’t the first time there’d been a slip up before wedding bells rang out, and no doubt it wouldn’t be the last. ‘How long are they staying at her father’s house?’ Ruby wanted to know.
‘I didn’t even know they were coming,’ Johnny admitted, ‘Although, come to think of it, Thomas did say something about how it was the lad’s first birthday, and Oliver Arnold wanted to see him.’ He looked at the infant, a happy, handsome boy with dark hair and big brown eyes. ‘He’s a bonny lad, and no mistake.’ At the back of his mind he wondered whether there was a chance that he and Ruby would ever raise a family.
Suddenly, Teresa turned and saw them. For a long moment, while pretending to listen to her husband’s chatter, she stared at Johnny in a certain way. A knowing and intimate way, which stirred Ruby’s curiosity. She did not acknowledge them, nor did she stop. At the point where the path swerved away, she smiled. It was a smile that spoke of secrets. Dangerous, thrilling secrets.