Putting It All Together
This book has offered you an overview of some of the ways there are to interpret and work with the moon. By now, hopefully you’ve begun tracking your energy and noticing what each lunar phase feels like for you. Maybe you’ve made a moon map and have begun your own process. Perhaps you’ve tried some of the suggested spells, rituals, or tarot pulls for each phase. Maybe your relationship with all things moon ebbs and flows, comes and goes. And that’s absolutely perfect too.
And also: You are here now because you want results. Powerful, lasting results. You are ready and willing. If you want results, you must be consistent. If you want internal and external transformation, you must put in the effort. And if you want the most stellar results possible, you must engage with one entire lunar phase from start to finish. At the bare minimum.
Committing to an entire lunation through taking some of the recommended actions presented will benefit you greatly. The process is designed to consider all aspects of a shift. If energy, mindset, internal blocks, behaviors, and habits are not addressed, we may find ourselves repeating the same patterns that have held us back from achieving self-actualization. For many of us, trust in self has been eroded or severed. Commitment to a solid self-practice is one way to restore trust.
Usually, we work through the same large themes over the course of many lunar cycles. Deprogramming takes time, reprogramming takes time, and building trust takes time. It is also recommended to revisit a theme through a different lens: as we grow and evolve, so does the nature of our self-inquiry. Moon mapping and doing lunar work around scarcity, for example, will look very different when you are trying to make enough to support yourself, versus when you’ve been able to meet your income goals. Similar to reading the same book once a year, or seeing a movie repeated times, you’ll be aware of different things each time you use this process.
Even if one is not necessarily interested in undergoing huge changes every lunation, understanding your own energy patterns is incredibly helpful. Giving yourself space to follow your intuition and natural inclinations within the moon’s phases offers us a way to ground. This gives us the relief of acceptance. If we feel full of sorrow, we cry without judgment—the need for analysis isn’t always necessary. We don’t always need to figure out the why: sometimes, we cry because for us personally, the dark moon correlates to emotional release.
Everything is a relationship. We define ourselves by relating. In the past, humans existed in an intimate relationship with nature—much more so than most of us do now. This was in part because our survival depended on it. Our brains have been hardwired to notice patterns, and this attribute is one of the reasons of our species’ growth. This noticing led to agricultural technology and astrology, for example. This noticing also led to an enhanced relationship with our surroundings, which in turn led to spirituality, religions, cultural traditions: all ways in which humankind finds meaning. Turning to a practice of noticing connects us to the present. A relationship with cosmic cycles assures us that our own cycles are part of an ancient natural order.
Moon work can be daunting, because we are meeting our hopes and fears while dwelling in the in-between. Through my own work, and work with hundreds of people, I’ve witnessed that painful emotions like fear and grief will inevitably surface. Finding a toolkit of healthy resources and additional support systems is key. (And is also another great benefit of this work.) Sticking to the decision to choose yourself and your goal, day after day, in some way, despite boredom or doubt, will be one of your tasks. Internal blocks and resistance are often a sign that you are doing the work. Find ways to stay motivated and continue investing in yourself.
Following are some things to remember about the process of lunar magic. As you embark on your own particular path, take note of the ugly, the unexpected, and all the untamed beauty you encounter. After working closely with the moon for a few cycles, you will be able to come up with your own list of reminders.
THINGS TO REMEMBER DURING THIS PROCESS
1. If this was easy, everyone would do it. Committing to a spiritual path is not easy. Under the white supremacist patriarchy, committing to yourself and your dreams can feel like actual treason. This is a nonlinear process filled with victories and challenges of all sorts. You will come head-to-head with your demons. Mindsets will need to be examined and re-patterned. Habits and behaviors will have to be fundamentally changed. Certain relationships may have to be shifted, or you may have to leave them behind altogether. You will be asked to find and come back to yourself, over and over. This is difficult work—anathema to the quick-fix culture we are immersed in. But you can do it, absolutely. You are fully equipped to step into your power and to experience the authentic expression of your soul. In actuality, that’s what you were born to do!
2. You will meet resistance. Countless times. Day after day. There will be lying voices in your head trying to fill you with doubt. Voices that will tell you change is impossible. That you are an imposter; that you don’t deserve to take up space; that you don’t even know what you know. That you are too old; your desires are too unattainable. Every person will meet resistance. Resistance is proof that you are undertaking something important. One sign that a breakthrough is imminent is when everything seems impossibly hard or scary. I dislike telling people in it this, but it is true. Factoring in resistance as part of your process will help you move through it. Address resistance and find ways to keep going. (Rest is absolutely one way to keep moving.)
3. You will meet grief. During any humanifestation process, you will also encounter grief. You may mourn “lost time” or a past self. This is normal. This happens because the brain has not yet caught up to the soul. This also is a symptom of “survivor’s guilt,” the conflicted emotions one feels when you exceed the expectations or achievements of your family, your peer group, or your initial self-regard that was primarily forged out of self-protection. When we heal a certain pattern it can, at first, leave a hole in our life like a ghost. Our animal body and emotional body interpret this as a loss. Grief isn’t necessarily something you need to analyze or interpret. Grief is something that needs to be named and processed. Hold space for your grief and do not judge it. Do not use this as a reason to stop moving forward in your process.
4. You will need to build a container for your desires: one that is more flexible and larger than you think you need. The container you build will be forged from the qualities of your desire. This container needs to be adaptive, not rigid. There might need to be multiple containers you spend time in. Use your intuition to allot energetic containers, emotional containers, and containers of time to your goals and process. There always needs to be extra space to let in whatever magically wishes to grow inside them. Consider yourself a container too. Try being responsive, yet having a specific, beneficial structure. Consider what it would look like to let things pass in and out of you, without clinging to any of it. To be a crystal-clear channel, ready to receive and transmit. This is a trick to living in the moment and it is most certainly a trick to manifesting. Part of this practice includes letting go and surrendering. It is difficult to overcome controlling, scarcity-based programming, but let the rewards entice you enough to try. It is completely possible to become a clear channel. The kind that no one owns and that is a gift of the universe.
5. Expect to embrace a lot of complexities. This process requires you to suspend certain expectations, while also being present for and attuned to your deepest desires every day. You must toggle between panoramic vision and granular detail. During one lunar phase, you may be blown away by the depths of your magical power, then emotionally leveled during the next. Knowing that no one state lasts forever will make it easier to make it through the hard times. In this culture, we are often programmed to believe in profound scarcity. In order to achieve success or victory, someone else must not achieve. Even without overt capitalism, competition still pops up in different ways: comparison, judgments, sabotage. Humans look for metrics of acceptability and “goodness” everywhere. Those who operate outside of the metric, refuse to play the game, or who possess a form of unacceptability are threatening to those within the matrix.
We then perpetuate those ideas within ourselves. We put limits and caveats on our very soul. We can have one thing, but it has to come at a cost to another. We can be one thing, but we’ve got to stifle or shove down another aspect of ourselves. Showing up whole—allowing ourselves to be complex, at times contradictory—is one of the greatest presents (presence) we can give ourselves. You are allowed to be: successful, neuro-divergent, happy, messy, timid, fierce—all at once. You are allowed to be depressed and still have desires. You are allowed to have thoughts of self-loathing yet still hold an enviable job and have a partner that adores you. You are allowed to be wildly successful and wish the same for everyone else. You are allowed to grow out of certain identities while still enjoying fundamental aspects of self. You are allowed.
This process disrupts either/or thinking and the binary by accepting all the parts of self, including the parts that may never be reconciled or healed. It encourages self-acceptance and goes beyond the problematic gaze of the meritocracy. Learning how to hold, and accept, various complexities simultaneously is an invaluable skill set you will learn as a result of this process.
6. Finding clear metrics of success will be imperative, as will ways to stay motivated. This entire process also needs discernment around what success will actually look like. What is the ultimate outcome you want and what will be the indicators of that? This is doubly important for goals that are more interior or healing focused, such as finding self-love or happiness. Find a metric with which to measure your success. Staying motivated will be another vital part of your plan. Humans gravitate toward instant gratification. There will be discomfort. (See numbers 1–3 on this list.) A part of your plan must be coming up with ways you will reward yourself for keeping your promises. Thinking of the process as an experiment is more useful than seeing it as a means to an end.
7. You may not recognize yourself afterward. Who you are will absolutely change. You may find you do not know yourself during, or after, the process. Try to refrain from labeling yourself too quickly. Take note of what you feel drawn to and what you are no longer interested in. Let yourself discover another—also temporary—identity. Allow your natural intelligence to guide you into the gardens and scenes in which you now feel engaged. There can be an inclination to grant others the authority of your own results. It was this person that helped you, it was this book, it was this, it was that. Of course we do not operate in a vacuum; as relational beings we need support and help from others, and we need to thank and reference those helpers accordingly. Ultimately, you are the author of your own results. Underneath any doubt, anxiety, or confusion, you are the one who ultimately knows what’s best for you. Try to view this version of yourself with intrigue. Let getting to know this different version of yourself be pleasurable.
8. Trust the blessings that come. There will be extraordinary success and unexpected gifts that come as a result of your work. Results beyond your wildest wishes will blossom. Things you never even knew you wanted, but absolutely needed, will be offered. When betrayal and hardship is what we’ve come to expect, because that is what we’ve been living with for much of our past life, we think the good is a fluke. Common survivor responses are hypervigilance, constructed caveats, and waiting for the other shoe to drop. It is normal to not believe or trust the love or grace or ease coming in, but staying closed off will help no one. Try to trust the gifts and blessings. Try to normalize them. Try to expect them. These are yours to enjoy and there are even more on their way.
MY STORY: A SPIRITUAL PRACTICE
The above reminders can serve as a guide—and a dose of truth—through our experiences with lunar living. It is also helpful to share other actual examples of the tangible results of this work. Below are some stories from myself, my clients, and my students that illustrate some specific processes and the results. While all of our paths are our own, there is universality to this specific kind of lunar work. The goals can sometimes be a Trojan horse into a deeper healing process: as belief in one’s capabilities expands, previously compromised life force is restored. Chasing material or more superficial desires leads to subconscious pattern reprogramming and profound spiritual connections. My story might be similar to yours or you might be inspired by one of the other shares.
I initially came to working with lunar cycles the good old-fashioned way: I was a baby witch who was unhappy. I desperately wanted results. I would cast spells here and there, in an unfocused manner. My desires were deeply unrelated to my reality—I was not working with my sphere of influence. My actions in the real world were quite unrelated to the efforts of my spells. There would be little to no follow-through around what I wanted after the spell was cast. As a result, very little would change. Or enough would change to make me believe in magic, but then my own behavioral backslides would leave me back where I metaphorically began. I was ready to break self-harming patterns. I was ready to know abundance and tap into my own power. I then began to time my spells with the moon. The results were much more effective.
Through the years, I began to pair my psychological, behavioral, emotional, and subconscious efforts with the suggested magical and practical correspondences of the moon phases. I decided to work through one major desire around the phases of one lunar cycle. The results were remarkable.
In 2012, after four years of fine-tuning the work I had developed, I began teaching what I had learned all around the country. A few years later, in 2015, the moon told me to write real-time, channeled workbooks, giving the readers suggestions on how to work with each phase. So I did. Even though I wasn’t a writer, even though I never wanted to self-publish self-help or magical books, I channeled, designed, wrote, and distributed six Many Moons workbooks over the course of three years, on top of running my existing business.
My lunar work has brought me a lot of joy and a lot of abundance. I’ve also had to face a lot of the pain and sorrow that accompanies healing through this process. Boundary work, saying good-bye to certain influential relationships because they were not supportive, investing in trauma therapy, and needing to make time for deep grief have all been aspects of this process that have been brutal but necessary. I have made vast improvements in many different aspects of self: work, creativity, self-worth, self-esteem, mindset, and more. This is where the ripple effect comes in. Directly healing the root of an issue generates greater energy and ease for positive change in related areas or themes. That in turn affects other aspects of our existence. When I was able to understand that scarcity issues were at the root of what I thought were “just” issues around work or money, doing work around that root not only changed the actual aspects of my work and bank account, but how I fundamentally valued myself. My healthy self-regard and the abundance philosophy I live by have been priceless consequences of this approach.
There’s a mysterious aspect of lunar work. The specific outcome will be unknown. This requires active listening on many different levels. In doing the work, we must pay attention to our intuition.
Our intuition is here to help us heal. When we listen to our intuition, in part, we are receiving information on where to go next in service of our healing. The steps we take toward our intuitive yearnings facilitate this healing. Healing doesn’t always feel good. It doesn’t always line up with our culture’s definitions of success. One byproduct of listening to our intuition can be encountering loss, trials, and tests. Ask yourself: What is available now for healing? Define what that would look like for you, and for you alone. Proceed accordingly.
When we enter into the spiral that is moontime, we see how many different aspects of our lives are connected. All rivers that flow into the same ocean. Our intuition gives us more clues on what to focus on, what healing is available to us, or what thread to follow next.
I wouldn’t do this work if I was not witness, over and over again, to the positive effect it has on people. Over the last six years, I’ve been fortunate enough to hold space for and to guide thousands of folks on how to work with the moon in order to self-actualize in various ways. What follows are some of their stories. These narratives all describe a six-week period: the length of time of my Moonbeaming classes—two weeks of teaching and goal setting, and then moving through one entire lunar cycle. Participants focus on a specific theme or goal. Their stories include self-love, managing physical pain, honoring creativity, finding meaningful work, and shifting fear and anxiety around money. Hopefully these stories will inspire you and give you greater insight into what collaborating with the moon consists of and looks like. Please note that because I conduct my classes at different times of the lunar cycle, some of the testimonials begin at different lunar phases. This proves that you can start at any phase you wish, and still see results!
SILAS’S STORY: PRIORITIZING ART AND CREATIVE ABUNDANCE
Silas’s goal was to focus on his art practice. He wanted to have more time to work on his art, outside of his day job, and wanted to prioritize energy for it. Silas kept a moon journal of his physical, emotional, and energetic states. He meditated daily (which was already part of his existing practice), though he shifted to doing so at the lunar altar he changed up for each moon phase. As he journaled, he got super clear on what he wanted his art practice to look like.
New Moon: In the new moon phase, Silas wrote down all his dreams for his art. He planned studio visits with artists he knew. He identified three specific finished pieces he wanted to make. He also determined that two days a week, he would work on his art for three hours minimum. Interestingly, he was often traveling for work during this time and did some of his most productive visioning work ten thousand feet up in a plane!
Waxing Moon: During the waxing moon phase, Silas spent his time working on the art itself. He applied to a residency and though he didn’t get it, the process of doing so clarified his work so strongly that he ended up taking a staycation and doing his own “residency.” This gave him time to make the work he had been conceptualizing at the new moon. Having work he believed in led him to reach out to artists he admired; this ended up leading to a studio visit with an artist who was also a critic at the residency he did not get into! This was also when Silas realized that everything he does is his art—his design, writing, poetry—because he is an artist, no matter what.
Full Moon: At the full moon, Silas celebrated abundance. He did a deep gratitude ritual. This coincided with a profound run-in with a former teacher of his, who is a prominent leader in the field his day job is in. She asked to put his work in a lecture she was giving. She then inquired about a book he designed, which he happened to have with him. As he gave it to her, she asked him to sign it. Silas interpreted that as a really potent, full circle, full moon moment.
Waning Moon: During the waning moon phase, Silas focused on letting go of limiting beliefs around his art practice. He also just coasted and rested. Focused on enjoyment and meditation. He enjoyed the feeling of being an artist. Silas noted that he ended up being the most productive with the least amount of effort here. He also earned the most money he had ever earned in one month. He gave a profitable talk and won several new clients in his business.
There was a lot of challenging stuff for Silas to acknowledge. Making time for his art alongside his already busy life was tough. A lot of imposter syndrome resistance came up. He was also tracking his money very closely during this cycle, which brought up complex emotions. Silas met fear and self-doubt mostly at the dark moon and waning moon. The dark moon was also where he noticed that he was most drained, which is useful information for him moving forward. He also had regret and sadness that he had not done this sooner.
Engaging with a lunar practice changed Silas’s life financially, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. He connected and became close with many working artists. He feels more connected to his partner, family, friends, and ancestry. Silas feels more present to his own needs and to his own higher self. Most important, he knows he is an artist and art witch in ways he didn’t know before.
DEYANDRÉ’S STORY: DEEPENING INTO DESIRES AND CREATIVITY
DeYandré’s goal for her lunar cycle manifestation work was to kick-start her fashion-styling business. DeYandré challenged herself to live what she wanted to inspire: to adorn her energy, to have fun getting dressed, and to appreciate self-expression. Through this intention, DeYandré opened herself up in a public way.
New Moon: Behind the scenes, she created a “moonifesto” and planted future seeds for her personal growth and her business. DeYandré set an intention to post an outfit on social media every day of the lunar cycle that coincided with her mood and was inspired by the current moon phase.
Waxing Moon: During the waxing moon, DeYandré committed to her intention and consistently shared her outfit daily alongside growing the social media presence of her business. Fear, resistance, and insecurity came up during the new moon and waxing moon phases as DeYandré worked toward her goal. Doubt and discomfort around feeling not ready and exposed arose during these phases, as did fighting the feeling of imposter syndrome.
Full Moon: At the full moon time, these struggles became illuminated as lessons. She celebrated her progress at the full moon. As a woman of color, she allowed herself to be seen and take up space. DeYandré embraced the act of receiving this gift and recognized how valuable it was to be vulnerable.
Waning Moon: At the waning phase, anger surrounding old habits, patterns, and limiting beliefs were harder for DeYandré to tolerate. She translated these struggles and resistance into reminders to continue showing up for herself and her personal growth.
DeYandré recognized that Black beauty is a radical act and needs to be shared in an authentic way. DeYandré reclaimed self-love through the act of investing time and energy into a personal goal, and felt supported by something bigger than herself—allowing her to chip away at her ego and contribute to the collective. Through the process, she gained courage, confidence, and peace. As a self-identified highly sensitive person, lunar work is now invaluable and ingrained in her daily practice. Since the first moon cycle DeYandré worked with, she has launched a determination project inspired by both fashion and the moon. She has also been presented with multiple opportunities that remind her of her purpose. She now also has her own spiritual toolkit. Through working with the moon, DeYandré has created a practice of self-care, meditation, and writing.
CHELSEA’S STORY: SOFTENING INTO HEALING PHYSICAL PAIN
Chelsea utilized lunar work to alleviate pelvic pain she had been suffering from for several years. She wanted to create healthier practices to better take care of herself physically and mentally; specifically reevaluating her relationship with social media and drinking. When starting her lunar work, Chelsea initially struggled to give up these crutches. By reframing and adjusting how she consumed both, she was able to focus on her self-work as well as help heal her body.
New Moon: Chelsea created a morning routine of meditation, tea, journaling, dream work, and physical exercise. At first, shame surrounding Chelsea’s past relationships, and how she allowed people to treat her, came bubbling to the surface. So did feelings of shame around her body not functioning correctly, and fears of never being loved because of it. These forms of resistance emerged right away, as they had been festering for a while before she began the process. This helped Chelsea realize that she needed to focus on a lot of self-love and forgiveness activities throughout her lunar work.
First Quarter Moon: During the first quarter moon, Chelsea focused on her physical therapy exercises and external core strength exercises, while making an effort to do yoga three times a week. In this phase, Chelsea cast a protection spell around her sacral area and practiced self-love by receiving and accepting compliments.
Full Moon: The full moon brought celebration around the milestone she achieved: no social media usage since starting this cycle! Her morning routines were also going strong.
Last Quarter: As the moon entered the last quarter phase, Chelsea reflected on what had softened in her body and in her mind since deciding to focus on her physical and emotional healing. She performed a cord-cutting ceremony to bring back her own energy and block those relationships that were draining to her energy. Chelsea also practiced forgiveness work around a past relationship that she still held shame around in order to let go of energy that was hindering her healing.
Dark Moon: The energy of Chelsea’s cutting ceremony continued during the dark moon: she cleaned out the physical spaces of her home and made her bedroom a sacred area and removed all objects from past relationships and thus their lingering ghosts.
After the lunar cycle—and the class—ended, Chelsea continued to work on resolving her physical pain, but was able to accept, through lunar work, that the healing process would not be a quick fix. For Chelsea, the most exciting and tangible results were the shift in her mindset surrounding her healing path. Before this lunar work, Chelsea had a lot of shame and guilt around dealing with discomfort in such a private area of her body. The work allowed her to find self-acceptance, to process her health more holistically, and to find trustworthy and supportive people to talk about it with. In working with the moon and its phases, Chelsea was able to carve out specific time to plan, work, and rest and created more ease and connection to her inner self.
Chelsea writes: “I definitely feel more at ease and connected to myself through this work. My confidence in general has grown, to the point where I’ve had friends mention that they can tell there is a difference in the way I present myself. I’ve always felt connected to my intuition, but only to a point. This work has made me more comfortable in listening to that intuition and following what she’s telling me without making excuses. It allowed me to realize that I purposefully wasn’t listening to the messages I was receiving. It allowed me to define my magic.”
JAIME’S STORY: EMBODYING THE DEATH CARD TO FACILITATE NEW BEGINNINGS
Jaime’s goal for her first lunar cycle was to begin to cultivate trust in her intuition and in the universe. Throughout the lunar phases, Jaime’s goal shifted to become about self-acceptance, and ultimately about embracing the void. Jaime utilized the tarot to help enhance her lunar cycle work, creating structure, guidance, and prompts for each lunar phase. Jaime started at the waning moon, a potent time to clear away obstacles.
Waning Moon and Dark Moon: During the waning moon, Jaime cast a tarot magic spell and chose to embody the Death card. In doing so, Jaime embraced the process of release and the prospect of new beginnings, internally and externally. For the dark moon phase, Jaime continued to embody the Death card energy while implementing breath work to help release fears.
New Moon and Waxing Moon: Jaime cast a new moon attraction spell and repeated this spell for three days in a row. Jaime began this spell when she could see the first sliver of the moon, and so this spell was also part of her waxing moon work. Jaime called in new beginnings, new opportunities, and new relationships that would increase her financial, emotional, mental, and physical prosperity. Jaime challenged herself to do things that scared her. This included promoting a new class she was teaching despite her fear of being seen. Jaime also started a daily gratitude journal to remind herself how abundant her life was.
Full Moon: Jaime completed a full moon expansion spell from my Moonbeaming class during the full moon to bring in expansion in four different areas of her life, based on the elements. This time also brought tangible change: Jaime decided to quit a job she no longer enjoyed, chased new job opportunities, and embraced trust in herself to create space for necessary growth and new beginnings.
Jaime writes: “Working an entire lunar cycle proved to me I can trust and rely on myself. I started to see my life reflected in the lunar cycles. The course was a new moon period of my life where I planted the seeds of what I see budding and blossoming around me today.
“Trusting myself and the Universe felt challenging. Figuring out how to implement my goal was a challenge because after setting my intention I realized trust had many layers to it. Committing to the daily practices was often challenging because it required self-discipline and relentless self-love. Accepting the changes, even the changes for the better, was a challenge and definitely brought up grief. Doing so many spells in one lunar cycle was also a bit of a challenge, but I really wanted things to change!
“A series of synchronistic events occurred, some things ended abruptly and painfully, and some amazing opportunities came my way. Ultimately my partner and I both quit our jobs and started a business that has afforded us the opportunity to travel and live in different areas, be with our dogs nearly 24-7, and set our own schedule, all while making more money than I ever have in my life.
“I’m trusting the Universe without the same resistance I once had. I have a stronger relationship with my intuition and have been able to more easily understand and receive when an intuitive hit comes in. It has been freeing to step further into my personal power.”
ERYN’S STORY: CONJURING WORTHINESS AND LOVE
Eryn utilized working through a lunar phase to work on self-love: specifically to deeply know herself as worthy of receiving love. When going deeper in the moon-mapping process, Eryn felt challenges in acknowledging how she had abandoned herself and denied herself love, and her inability to be herself in her quest to garner approval and acceptance from others. To help work through this, Eryn decided to lean on a toolkit of self-care, particularly breath work and prioritizing self-compassion and understanding.
New Moon: Eryn wrote a new moon moonifesto (from a suggested exercise in my course), which outlined all the ways she was committed to practicing self-love. She practiced making decisions from a place of love, rather than from fear of losing love. She also cast a new moon attraction spell from my Moonbeaming course, for gratitude and love.
Waxing Moon: Eryn scheduled self-care and created more firm boundaries around her needs. She pulled tarot cards to help her identify that the root of her belief was she was unlovable. She spent more intentional time with herself. She ended up connecting with a new spirit guide who came through to help with this work.
Full Moon: At the full moon, Eryn received clarity about some unloving and unhelpful patterns she had. She wrote herself a love letter and did an embodied spell for self-love based on giving herself pleasure and honoring her body.
Waning Moon: Eryn connected with some times that she had abandoned herself, and worked on self-forgiveness and self-compassion. She did a suggested class tarot pull for shame that was incredibly powerful for her. She did a clearing spell to release shame around being alone and the belief that her worthiness is conditional. She reframed beliefs about herself, mostly around the conditions under which she had believed she deserved love. She created more unscheduled time/free space for herself and slept more.
Eryn shared: “It was challenging to see the ways in which I had abandoned myself, the ways in which I had denied myself love, the ways in which I had tried to make myself different in order to be more acceptable to and receive love from others. Grief and anger both came up, mostly toward myself.
“The process absolutely changed my life. Some things that have come from the process: More honoring of my desires without apology. Less people-pleasing. An ability to be more vulnerable and let myself be more seen. Taking up more space in my authentic expression of self. More self-compassion, and a kinder voice in my head.
“From that place (along with other work through other lunar cycles), my external world has certainly shifted—my work has expanded, my intimacy in relationships has deepened, I’ve been able to set some needed boundaries (something I have always struggled with), and I’ve made more money in my work.”
THE MOON WILL HELP YOU BREAK UP WITH THE PATRIARCHY
In the stories just shared, we see themes of empowerment, healing, and self-actualization. These are all the through lines of lunar work. This is profound work that helps the collective. The world needs more aware and empowered people than ever before. When we create our own compassionate paradigms, the archaic oppressive ones fall away. As we model resilience, soft power, and strength, others gravitate toward collective models of care and liberation. As our own cups of care get filled, we are able to better offer up resources to others who need them. This is all threatening to patriarchal systems. Lunar work helps to dismantle oppressive systems. Maybe that’s the reason why the patriarchy is so afraid of the moon.
The white supremacist capitalist patriarchy has us back bent and twisted in mind-body-soul to standards that are impossibly violent as well as impossible to achieve. This is reflected in the media, in discriminatory and violent laws and policies, in the impossible standards that people who are not cis, straight, white, thin, and able-bodied are expected to conform to in order to be allowed to exist without violence and abuse. By patriarchal standards I am a failure. I have a weird job that isn’t easily explainable at a dinner party, I’m queer, I struggle with ADHD and a serious chronic illness, I live my life intuitively, and am committed to spiritual growth. I focus on what I can do to aid the collective. Organizing my life around pleasure, connection, and healing often makes me feel like I am a psychedelic-colored salmon swimming upstream.
Having a different code of ethics and value system than most often leads to disappointment. There isn’t a lot of external reward for making decisions based in values and integrity, such as turning down lucrative offers, or needing to end relationships with folks who are behaving in abusive ways. Listening to my body and slowing down goes directly against the busier-than-thou culture. Yet my very thriving depends on defining success in a very personal, very lunar, very magical way. Knowing my inherent worth outside of what I can do for others, or based on what I can produce, is the North Star that brings me back into my energetic alignment.
Ultimately, the moon helped me undertake one of the most priceless gifts of my entire life: honoring myself and getting free of abuse. It will be a lifelong process to heal from the abuse and trauma I’ve experienced in my life. The ideologies, self-acceptance, and messages I’ve received as a result of investing in my magic and spirituality have been the foundation of my healing process. Investing in this work continues to give me hope and faith during the days that threaten to plunge me into despair. Time and time again, the practices I’ve shared here with you have worked. And so, I keep sharing them and utilizing them.
The moon helped me break up with the patriarchy. Helped me to live by my own set of ethics and values. Helped me to honor my intuition and my own unique talents. Helped me to detach from abusive ways of treating myself that I internalized. This is a lifelong effort that I will be preoccupied with. It is a nonnegotiable one. To allow space for our imaginations to bloom and commit to support others in their processes is to steadily re-enchant the world.
THE MOON LEADS US TOWARD THE WORK OF LOVE
Lunar work reminds us that it all begins with the self, and it all begins with love. As bell hooks taught us, love is an action, first and foremost.1 Expressions of love change as we grow. As we gain versatility in the ways that we process our emotions and connect with our intuition, we enact a homecoming of the self. Our influence on the world around us increases as we understand and tap into our power.
We must feed ourselves before we starve. A self-care practice requires constant consideration, as it is the practice of continuous nourishment. A self-care practice is not selfish. If you don’t prioritize yourself, who will?
Love yourself enough to let yourself be loved. In the exact ways you require. You can always decide to go where the love is. In quiet moments, you can show yourself, with actions, how you need to be loved, and become love itself. The work of love helps us do the work of life.
There is so much work to do. There is priceless nature, animals, and humans to fight for, so much to resist, so much organizing to join and do, so many dollars to donate, so many signal boosts to amplify and petitions to sign, artwork to make for protests. Love helps us focus where we put our energy, helps us hold on to our visions, and helps us put one foot in front of the other in the scariest moments.
And there is so much beauty to take in: so many books to read, so many sunsets to behold, so many songs to listen to or play or write, so many dogs to meet and pet, so many wise teachers to learn from. So many opportunities to close our eyes, gently smile, and turn our cheek toward the sun. If we don’t enjoy our lives, if we don’t drink in as much sheer awe and sweetness as we can, then the sadness and the sorrow we all will face becomes utterly unbearable.
Our lives are very, very short.
We get to put our energy into sweet connections, mutual care and support, loving conversations, and all the things that light us up and inspire us and excite us.
It is my hope that returning to a space of reverence in your practice will invoke a reverent spaciousness for all the aspects of yourself. Whether or not you decide to continue on with the moon as your sole guide, or incorporate other practices into your toolkit, you can always call on her to be an anchor. A reminder that it is okay to change, to evolve, to explore different sides of yourself. To keep going and trying. An affirmation that the spiral of your life is a natural and blessed one. That the work of love is worth every second.
