The English army establish themselves in Dunsinane.
All through summer – or what they call summer –
Siward had us marching over land – or what they
Call land – from house to house – to eat food –
Or what they call food – with the chiefs of every clan.
From clan to clan we’d march day on day
And in every place we’d get sharp glances
And we’d smile back – you know – for the children,
Offer out our hands to them with nuts or something
But always the children leaving our hands alone and
Then always one child hiding behind some woman
And the woman’s eyes burning at us.
And you’d want something burning here anyway because, mother,
I don’t know if you’ve ever heard this but Scotland is cold!
You’ve not felt coldness until you’ve felt the coldness
Of the air here and the beds and the nights,
And so you’d want a burning of eyes or anything
Just to warm yourself on those long marches
When you’d think in this next village surely there’ll be
A fire – a hearth we can stand against – but no –
Every time just cold damp air and the eyes of women.
And we began to wonder what sort of country this is
Where everything that in England was normal –
Summer, land, beer, a house, a bed – for example –
In Scotland – that thing would turn out to be made of water –
This is what you learn here – nothing is solid.
You look at the ground ahead of you and you guess
And you make a jump and suddenly you’re up to your waist in mud,
You think this forest floor can take your weight,
You think over there’s a lake,
But one’s mud and the other’s rock.
And whichever way you walk you hurt yourself.
So you can tell this, mother, to any boys you happen to meet,
If they say they’re being sent up north to join us –
Say to them this one thing – tell them – my son says, in Scotland
Always be careful where you put your feet.
*
The hall is full of all the valuable objects of the castle.
Soldiers bring more into the hall in chests.
Egham I hate this country.
One set of wooden plates.
Boy Soldier One set of wooden plates.
Egham God never meant people to live this far north, you know.
One tapestry showing a woodland scene.
Boy Soldier One tapestry showing a woodland scene.
Egham I know we’re not supposed to attempt to deduce God’s intentions, but just a glance tells you – if God had meant people to live this far north he would have given us fur.
Four barrels of – some type of beer.
Boy Soldier Four barrels of beer.
Egham Of course the Scots are hairy.
One Bible.
Egham But that alone can’t explain it.
They must marshal some other kind of heat inside them.
Four silver goblets.
Boy Soldier Four silver goblets.
Egham Grudge.
That’s what it is.
An assortment of alder cups.
Boy Soldier An assortment of alder cups.
Egham Their grudge keeps them warm.
Even when it’s so cold my balls are shrunk tight against my bum. Their dislike of us is keeping those bastards warm.
That’s the maddening thing.
They hate us and all we do is make the hairy ungrateful treacherous bastards more comfortable.
Seven blankets which smell of dogs.
Boy Soldier Seven blankets which smell of dogs.
Egham I’m not even supposed to be here you know.
Some dogs.
Boy Soldier Some dogs.
Egham Some horses.
Boy Soldier Some horses.
Egham I’m supposed to be a monk.
Four beds.
Boy Soldier Four beds.
Egham I’m supposed to be a monk giving myself over to God on some island somewhere.
Two dozen sacks of flour.
Boy Soldier Two dozen sacks of flour.
Egham Peace and quiet and cloisters.
Food from the abbey garden.
Ten skins full of wine.
Boy Soldier Ten skins of wine.
Egham Wine from the abbey vineyard.
Women.
One silver candlestick.
Boy Soldier One silver candlestick.
Egham I was supposed to be a monk
But my father insisted – fight –
There’s a war in Scotland – go and win us some land and a manor house.
Fifteen sacks of barley.
Boy Soldier Fifteen sacks of barley.
Egham Eighteen sacks of oats.
Boy Soldier Eighteen sacks of oats.
Egham What is the point?
What is the fucking point?
I ask you.
Boy?
Boy Soldier Sir?
Egham I ask you?
Boy Soldier What do you ask me, Sir?
Egham What’s the point in being alive?
Boy Soldier I don’t know, Sir.
Egham The point of life is to survive – you just have to try to get through as much of life alive as you possibly can and use whatever time you’ve got and whatever methods you can muster to make the journey as comfortable as is possible.
Stay alive and be comfortable.
Those are the purposes of life.
And they’re also the two things that are hardest to do when you spend your summer fighting a fucking war in Scotland.
Siward Egham.
Egham Siward. You’re back.
Siward Complaining again, Egham?
Egham No, Sir. Just – taking stock.
Siward Boy – go outside and guard the door.
The Boy Soldier exits.
How’s the inventory?
Egham Working through it, Sir.
Siward What’s the value so far?
Egham Five chests full of Scottish coins.
Six gold candle holders.
Twelve silver cups. Twelve silver plates.
Siward Only twelve?
Egham Yes, Sir.
Siward Maybe they eat off wood.
Egham Or else they’ve hidden the rest.
Siward What about the animals?
Egham Horses, dogs.
Cows, sheep, geese, hens.
Siward How many?
Siward How many exactly – how many geese? How many sheep? How many hens?
Egham A normal amount.
Siward Numbers, Egham.
Egham You want me to count livestock?
Siward We must count everything, Egham.
We’ll not steal.
Egham The army has to eat.
Siward We have to eat and so do the Scots.
Egham The men need to be paid and –
Siward We’ll pay the men and we’ll feed them, but the Scots need a treasury.
Egham Right.
I mean normally, Sir, there is a dividing and –
The men won’t last long on food and water and no excitement.
Siward The Scots think that we’re here to subdue them. It’s our job to prove them wrong. We’ll take no women and no gold and we’ll take not one beast more than we need. We will make them to trust us. Understand?
Egham Yes, Sir.
Siward Good.
How’s your shoulder?
Egham Sore.
Siward You’ll be back fighting soon.
Egham I don’t think so, Sir, it really is sore.
Siward It’s a small wound got in a good cause.
Wear the scar proudly, Egham.
Some lost more.
Trouble from off.
The Boy Soldier enters.
Boy Soldier Sir – sorry – she won’t – I can’t –
Wait.
Will you just wait.
Jesus.
Sorry.
Gruach enters.
Siward Gruach.
Gruach I am not comfortable.
Siward I’m sorry to hear that.
Gruach I want my clothes. I want my bed. And I want my women.
Siward I have only just returned from travelling, Gruach. If it’s about your living arrangements I’m sure Egham will help you.
Gruach I’m sure he won’t.
Siward What exactly is the problem?
Gruach I want my clothes.
Siward I will arrange for some clothes to be brought to you.
Gruach I don’t want ‘some’ clothes I want my clothes. My clothes have been taken.
Siward What do you mean – ‘taken’?
Gruach Two chests full of my clothes are missing from my rooms.
Siward And you think they were taken?
Gruach They didn’t walk.
Siward Who took them?
Gruach Your men took them.
Siward What would my men want with your clothes?
Gruach A queen’s clothes.
Siward What would my men want with a queen’s clothes?
Gruach I don’t know. What would your men want with a queen’s clothes?
Siward I’m sorry to hear of your troubles. Go back to your rooms and I’ll have some men look for the missing items.
Gruach They won’t have to look far. That chest you’re sitting on. That chest contains my clothes.
Siward looks at Egham.
Egham Blankets and curtains.
Siward This chest contains blankets and curtains.
Gruach It contains my wardrobe.
…
Open it.
They open the chest.
It contains the Queen’s clothing.
Gruach Did you intend to wear them?
Siward What’s this?
Gruach Is that the English habit?
Egham I remember now.
One of the lads – brought it down – looks similar to – other – similar chests – I’ll have a lad take it back up.
Siward Is there anything else missing?
Gruach A cup.
Siward Is it an important cup?
Gruach My father gave it to me when I was born.
It has the emblems of my family engraved on it.
Three snakes devouring a moon.
Siward Do we have the cup?
Egham It’s not on the inventory, Sir.
Siward We’ll try to find it.
Gruach And I want my bed.
Siward You have a bed.
Gruach I want my bed. I want to occupy my rooms – not the room at the back of the tower where you’ve put me – And I want my women.
Siward And if you had your clothes and this cup and your rooms and your women and your bed – would you be comfortable?
Gruach Yes.
Egham Sir – Malcolm insisted she be kept in the rooms at the back.
Siward Move her.
She may no longer be queen.
But she is still a woman – and this is still her house and we’re her guests in it.
See to it, Egham.
Egham Yes, Sir.
Siward You – boy – go with her and be her guard.
Boy Soldier Yes, Sir.
Gruach exits with The Boy Soldier.
*
The Great Hall.
Soldiers bring treasure.
Malcolm looks at the goods.
Malcolm Is this mine?
Siward It belongs to the treasury.
Malcolm My treasury.
Siward Scotland’s treasury.
Malcolm Mine.
I am still Scotland.
Aren’t I?
Siward I hope so.
Malcolm How was your trip?
Siward Good.
Malcolm How are our chiefs?
Siward They have their grievances.
Malcolm No surprises there.
Siward There are plenty of disputes to be unravelled. But if we persevere I believe that we can make a picture of the world which everyone agrees true.
Malcolm Make a picture of betrayal. They’d all agree on that.
Siward Malcolm, your position is strong. The Queen doesn’t have the support she might think. Some of the Moray chiefs talk about compromise.
Malcolm Don’t trust a word they say. They’re flies in her web. Nothing is spoken in Scotland without her knowing about it.
Siward If she’s speaking her wishes through them then let’s take her at her word.
Malcolm I wondered if she might eat something.
Siward What?
Malcolm A sick eel.
A bad hen.
Some glass.
Siward It’s in our interest to keep Gruach alive and
comfortable.
Malcolm I notice you moved her room.
Siward She said she was not comfortable.
Malcolm Spider.
Siward That’s ridiculous.
Malcolm Is it?
Siward She’s the only person in Scotland with the power
to settle this quarrel.
A settled quarrel will make for a settled kingdom.
Malcolm A settled kingdom is a kingdom in which everyone is dead.
Siward That’s not how it is in England.
Malcolm Lovely England.
I would have liked to have stayed in England. I like the way people speak in England. I liked hunting in those broad oak woods. I liked the dogs there and the horses.
I liked the way that nobody in England wanted to kill me.
There’s very little pleasure for me in being Scotland.
Give me back England and let someone else have my money.
Siward It’s not your money.
Malcolm I saw smoke.
Siward Smoke?
Malcolm Yesterday, coming from Dunkeld.
Was there an incident?
Any news of the boy?
Siward No. One of our patrols found two of the tyrant’s lieutenants hiding in a barn in the village. They had weapons and seemed to be preparing for an ambush. We burned the barn. They’re dead.
Malcolm What about the farmer?
Siward What farmer?
Malcolm The man whose barn it was.
Siward He’s safe.
Malcolm Good.
…
Is he one of mine?
Siward I don’t know.
Malcolm Mmm.
Only – if he’s one of mine he probably ought to have sacrificed himself for me when the tyrant’s men came – oughtn’t he? Rather than hiding them in his barn.
Siward They probably threatened him. He probably had no choice.
Still.
If you’re one of mine … that carries with it certain obligations.
Siward He’s an old man.
Malcolm Mine have to be seen to defend me.
The appearance of that is quite important.
If one of mine fails to defend me and I don’t punish him then I appear weak.
Siward You appear merciful.
Malcolm Mmm.
Siward At any rate, burning his barn should be punish ment enough.
Malcolm You must think us a very quarrelsome lot. Us Scots.
Siward The English quarrel too.
Malcolm Siward – I was raised in England – in those lovely oak woods where everything is sun-dappled and the forests are full of wild boar and deer and the tables always full of beer and ham – but here we are rock, bog, forest and loch. I am tied to mine. If one of mine doesn’t defend me to the death – well – and as it happens I hate this aspect of things – but there it is – that man has to die.
Siward What if this man was not one of yours? What if he came from another clan?
Malcolm Then there would be no problem.
If he’s of another clan we’d expect him to hide his own.
It might be good in that situation to appear merciful
…
Is he from another clan?
Siward He is a farmer, who is alive, with a family who will now be able to work for you and serve you and pay taxes and –
Malcolm Is he mine?
Siward I will not kill a man for doing a reasonable thing.
Malcolm Of course.
Of course. You’re right.
I’m sorry, Siward, you have to forgive me, sometimes I forget. The thinking in this country is so full of traps, you have to walk around in such circular paths, sometimes I forget that another type of thinking even exists.
Straight.
Do what you think is right.
I’ll do everything in my power to help you.
Siward exits.
Malcolm talks with some of his men.
Malcolm Donald.
Donald Sire.
Malcolm Send out two men. Find this man. Kill him and his family and divide his possessions amongst the villagers.
Malcolm’s men take weapons and leave.
*
Gruach’s women prepare the Queen’s new rooms.
Egham enters.
Egham Excuse me, My Lady.
Gruach Egham. What do you want?
Egham I just wanted to check that you were comfortable now.
Gruach For the time being.
Egham Do you have everything you need – clothes – things?
Gruach Yes.
Egham The cup you mentioned.
The silver cup.
I found it.
Egham shows her the silver cup.
Gruach Where was it?
Egham I took it.
I took your clothes.
Not to wear but to give to my soldiers to take back to their wives and daughters.
I took these things because we won.
You understand.
Siward wants peace.
But I want money.
I just want you to know where I stand.
Gruach Thank you.
Egham I want you to see that I will be honest with you.
Gruach You will be honest with me – about the fact that you are dishonest.
Egham If we both know where we stand. Perhaps we can help each other.
I know you don’t want us to be here.
Some of us don’t want to be here either.
Nonetheless we are here and so – we ought to make arrangements – so as to make our stay as comfortable as possible.
Egham gives her the silver cup.
Gruach Does Siward know you’re here?
Egham No.
The problem with Siward is that he’s a good man. Good men are very difficult to negotiate with.
Gruach You are not a good man.
Egham No.
Gruach What do you want?
Egham I want safe passage to market for my men to buy and sell goods.
I want my convoys unmolested.
Gruach What do you offer me in return?
Egham What do you want?
Gruach Would you betray your own side?
Egham It depends what you mean by ‘betray’.
Gruach Malcolm’s men are looking for my son.
I want him taken to safety with my people in Glen Lyon.
Egham Wouldn’t you prefer a Scottish guard for your boy?
Gruach I couldn’t trust anyone.
It’s better that he’s with an English patrol. Your men have no reason to betray him and Malcolm would have no reason to suspect. Take him to safety and my people will leave you to trade unmolested.
Gruach One of my people will take you to him.
Egham How will I recognise him?
Gruach He has the mark of my family on him.
Three snakes devouring a moon.
She gives him back the cup.
Gruach For you.
Take it to market.
You’ll get a good price for it.
Consider it a gesture of goodwill.
*
Evening in the castle yard.
The English army butcher cattle.
— Butcher said he’d finally found the castle herd up somewhere in the forest.
— Oh –
— They’d hid them out of the way while the fighting was happening.
— Fair enough.
— But the herdboy had been killed in the battle so no one knew where the cows were. You’d think they’d keep the herdboy with the herd, wouldn’t you?
— Yeah.
— But according to butcher it was more of a case of them going – we need everybody out there fighting – you, boy, here’s a spear – and then next thing you know one of our arrows get the herdboy – and then it’s a case of dead women all over the kitchen and eventually our butcher comes in and he finds someone who’s still got a tongue in her head and he says – RIGHT, BITCH, WHERE’S THE CATTLE! – and whoever it is, this half-alive one – she doesn’t know – and then butcher’s angry – COURSE YOU FUCKING KNOW, LEAD ME – and this half-alive one – whoever he is – she don’t speak English and everything’s all jumbled up anyway so – there’s pointing and there’s shouting and anyway – so it takes a week before butcher finally finds the cattle, and the point is – all that time the cows were just wandering happily in the forest getting fat – funny.
— Not that funny.
— What happened to the half-alive woman?
— I don’t know.
…
…
— I’m not going to tell you stories any more.
— Why not?
— You are not a good audience.
— Grumpy.
— Hungry.
— I really want a fuck.
— We’re not exactly starving.
— Not if you count eating shit.
— It’s not shit – that’s not right – it’s just weird.
— Horse food.
— Cow tonight, though. You can’t go wrong with cow.
— I don’t know.
— Pretty much just roast the thing.
What can go wrong with that?
— There’ll be something. It won’t be cow, it’ll be Scottish cow and it’ll taste of shitty water. There’s bound to be something. Or it’ll have bits in it.
— Scottish oats.
— There’s too much bits of stone in them.
— Something will be wrong with it.
Commotion.
A wounded soldier is brought into the courtyard by
some comrades.
— What happened?
— We were patrolling.
— In the woods down near the river.
— They came at us.
— A lot of them.
— They were waiting.
— They got Tom.
— Put him down.
— Where?
— Anywhere –
— Don’t put him down in the blood.
— He’s all blood, it doesn’t matter.
— Let’s see.
— It’s his leg.
— Let’s see.
— Might be something we can do.
— He’s breathing.
— Look.
— What?
— Look at this.
— Ohhh.
— Never saw that.
— His chest’s cut right open.
— Is he breathing?
— He’s still breathing.
— Ohh shit.
— What should we do?
— Poor Tom.
The wounded man screams.
— MOTHER!
Silence.
— Kill him.
— What?
— Do it.
— DO IT!
— What you staring at?
Clean this up.
Clean this up and get back to butchering.
The Soldiers clear away the body.
— This country.
— Stones and shitty water and the food’s shit.
— You wonder why we’re here.
— You wonder why we want the place.
— You wonder why they give a fuck.
*
In Gruach’s rooms the women prepare a drink over a cauldron.
As they work, they sing.
The Boy Soldier watches.
Boy Soldier Is it true that you eat babies?
Gruach Babies?
Boy Soldier They say you eat babies.
Gruach They say the Scots eat babies?
Boy Soldier Oh – no – I mean –
Gruach What do you mean?
Boy Soldier I was asking if it’s true that you eat babies?
Gruach Me?
Boy Soldier Yes.
Gruach They say that?
Boy Soldier They say that your husband would –
Gruach Would what?
Boy Soldier They said he’d murder people and when he’d murdered them, he’d …
Gruach Yes?
Boy Soldier Subdue their wives and –
And that when there was a baby –
Gruach What?
Boy Soldier They say he’d give it to you – and you would eat it.
Gruach They say that?
Boy Soldier Yes.
Gruach What they say –
Boy Soldier Yes.
Gruach It’s true.
Boy Soldier Jesus.
Gruach Have you never eaten baby meat?
Boy Soldier Me – no.
Gruach Don’t you eat baby meat in England?
Boy Soldier No – not in Kent, anyway.
Gruach You should try it.
Boy Soldier I don’t think so.
Gruach It’s delicious.
Very tender.
Boy Soldier That’s nice singing.
They do nice singing, don’t they?
Your ladies.
Lovely.
What is it?
…
What’s the song?
Gruach It’s not a song.
Boy Soldier What is it?
Gruach It’s a curse.
Boy Soldier On who?
Gruach You.
Boy Soldier Oh.
Gruach Drink it and you’ll turn into a bird.
Boy Soldier Right.
Gruach Fly away home.
Gruach offers a cup of the hot drink to the Boy
Soldier.
What’s the matter?
Don’t you want to go home?
Siward enters.
Siward Gruach.
Gruach Siward?
Siward Out.
Gruach What?
Siward There is a boy dead.
Out – out of these rooms – now.
Boy – get her out.
What’s going on?
Siward There is a boy dead.
Out there – in the dust of the castle yard. In amongst the cattle offal and the mud.
A boy. Dead.
He was killed by men who wore your colours.
Gruach Mine?
Siward You knew.
Gruach What did I know?
Siward You directed them to our patrol.
Gruach How?
Siward, I’m a prisoner here. How could I possibly have any idea about what goes on out there in the forest?
Siward You asked me to move your room.
Gruach Because I wanted to return to my own bed, yes.
Siward From this window you can see every time the gate is opened and every time a patrol leaves and you can see the direction in which they ride.
Gruach I have better things to do with my time than spy on your men.
Siward You saw them leave and then you sent a signal.
Gruach How?
Siward I don’t know – Light from a mirror. The words of a song. The clothes you wear at the window.
In this country anything can contain a message.
Why would I do this?
I’m under your protection.
At this moment you are the only thing standing between me and death at the hands of one of Malcolm’s assassins. It would be insane for me to behave in a way which would lead you to distrust me.
There is a war in this country but it’s a war between Malcolm and me.
I have no interest in England.
Siward Someone dressed in your colours killed one of my boys.
Gruach Credit me with a queen’s wit, Siward. If I wanted an English boy killed – and I don’t, but if I did – don’t you think I’d have my women add to their signalling song the instruction – ‘Do it – and when you do it – do it dressed in Malcolm’s colours’?
Of course you’re angry, Siward, you’re entitled to be angry, you’ve been deceived.
But not by me.
Ask yourself this: who benefits from your anger at me? Who would want you to be so angry with me that you might want to kill me? Who?
Siward There is a boy dead.
Gruach I know.
I know.
Siward’s anger is gone. The threat is gone.
Siward I was sent here to restore peace and I am trying to do that job as reasonably as I can.
Siward And out there is a boy dead.
Each boy who dies, I feel it.
Each boy who dies on whatever side, I feel it.
Gruach I know.
Siward Do you?
Gruach I do.
A moment.
Siward I’m sorry.
I shouldn’t have disturbed you.
Please … forgive the intrusion.
Siward goes to leave.
Gruach Siward.
Stay.
Talk.
Siward No – it’s best if I go.
Gruach Why?
You’ve talked with all the rest of Scotland. Talk with me.
The women have heated some wine.
Drink.
Gruach takes some up with a ladle.
Pours it into a cup.
She offers it to Siward.
Boy Soldier Sir!
Siward What?
Boy Soldier Sir – that drink is a curse.
It’ll turn you into a bird.
Siward What are you talking about?
Boy Soldier She told me.
Gruach It’s a magic potion.
I eat babies.
She drinks the wine.
Gruach Mmm.
Blood.
She offers the drink to Siward.
Siward Boy, go.
Find Egham. Tell him to take a patrol down into the village and find out what anyone saw of the ambush. Tell him to report to me later.
Go.
The Boy Soldier leaves.
Siward takes the drink.
Siward What type of bird?
Gruach What do you think?
Siward I think a falcon.
Gruach I think a cuckoo.
Making your home in another bird’s nest.
Siward drinks.
He checks he hasn’t turned into a bird.
Siward Still here.
Gruach For now.
Sit.
I’m bored of being a witch. I’m bored of queens and commanders. I’m bored of being stuck in this room. Siward, I have no company worth the name left with me in Dunsinane. You’re a guest in my rooms. Let’s pretend for a moment that we’re not enemies but only what we appear to be. A man and a woman drinking wine.
And talking.
No more than that.
Siward sits on the bed.
Gruach sits beside him.
Gruach Is something wrong?
Siward No.
Gruach Is there something you want?
Siward No.
Gruach What?
Siward The bed.
The tapestries.
The women.
It’s not what I’m used to.
Gruach You’re the Lord of Northumberland. You must know comfort in your own castle.
Siward My castle’s empty.
Gruach Don’t you have a woman there?
Siward No.
Gruach You’re like my husband.
Siward Am I?
He liked tents and fires and fields.
He didn’t like courts or kings.
Siward But you do.
Gruach I like being Queen.
Why do you smile?
Siward You’re honest.
Gruach Did you expect otherwise?
Siward No.
Gruach Give me your hand.
Siward Why?
Gruach Let me read your palms.
Siward Why?
Gruach You’re occupying my country.
I want to see your future.
Siward hesistates.
Siward These documents are state secrets.
Show me yours first.
Gruach I have nothing to hide.
She offers her hands.
What do you see?
Siward I don’t know.
Whatever it is, it’s written in a language that I can’t read.
Gruach Try.
Snow.
Gruach Now me.
Siward offers her his hands.
She takes them.
Siward What?
Gruach Fighting.
Siward What else?
Gruach Nothing else.
A moment.
Siward Your touch is gentle.
Gruach Does that surprise you?
Siward No.
Gruach Had you imagined my touch?
Siward Yes.
Gruach You imagined my touch and now here I am touching you.
Siward Maybe we should be careful.
Gruach Why?
Siward What would your people say if they saw you now?
Perched on the hand of England like a tame bird.
Gruach What type of bird?
Siward A falcon.
Gruach Falcons are never tame.
They just choose their allegiances very carefully.
Did your men kill my soldier?
Gruach No.
Siward Did you give them orders?
Gruach My men know what I want without me having to form it into words.
Siward What do you want now?
Gruach I think you know.
Siward goes to kiss her.
She lets him.
They kiss.
They withdraw.
Gruach Is this usually how you treat your enemies?
Siward I’ve never met an enemy like you before.
Gruach Like me?
Siward Captivating.
Gruach Captive.
Siward Both.
Gruach Ahh!
You’re an elegant talker, Siward, I’ll give you that, but for me –
To seduce a man in English – it’s like dancing wearing wooden shoes.
Siward Were you seducing me?
Gruach It seems so.
They kiss again.
Gruach We don’t need to be enemies, Siward. You said yourself there is no quarrel between us. Malcolm is a weak and venal man. He’s no king. Why can’t England’s ally in Scotland be me? Put your power together with mine.
Siward How?
Gruach You have no woman, Siward.
You have no home.
Marry me.
Siward Maybe you really are a witch.
Gruach I am not a witch but I am the Queen of Scotland.
And if you marry me.
You can be king.
Siward Is that possible?
Gruach Do you feel my breath now on your hand?
Siward Yes.
Gruach We are alive.
Everything is possible.
Everything.
Gruach kisses Siward.
He kisses her back.
The women close the curtains of the bed.
The women sing.
*
Two Archers fire arrows at a tapestry.
— I’m going to hit that woman right in the tit.
— I reckon.
— All right.
— Dear God, please make it that if I hit that woman in the tit then … then make it that I’ll touch a tit tonight.
One Archer fires.
The other Archer looks.
— Right in the tit.
Thank you, God.
— Whose tit?
— What do you mean, whose tit?
— Whose tit are you looking to touch tonight? Are you interested in any old tit or in some particular tit?
— I’m not following you, Edward.
— For example. God could easily say: well, here’s a tick to bite you on your own tit tonight, Tom, and then you’d have a scratch of your hairy scroffy tit and think bloody tick and God would say – well, there you go, Tom, that’s you with a tit touched – that’s me fulfilled my side of the bargain.
— I think not.
— I think so.
— I think God has more – has deeper – has higher things in mind than – I think God knows what I mean when I ask for a touch of a tit – I think.
— It’s a bold thing to ask a question of God. He’s not going to make it easy for you.
— I don’t think he’s out to trick me.
— No.
— He’s let you end up here.
In this arsehole of a country.
— Still.
I think he understands that if I must be stuck in this arsehole of a country it’s reasonable enough for me to ask him to mitigate things a bit with a little tit touch.
— Tits tits tits.
— What?
— All this talk? Have you got some – is there a woman lurking?
— No.
— A woman in your head there?
— Well.
— Who?
— The hen girl.
— Sweet merciful Jesus.
— I know.
— It all makes sense to me now. So … what you’re asking God is – will he let you get a hand on the hen girl tonight.
— And he’s just said yes.
— But has he? Look – we’ll seek clarification. The huntsman’s cock. I’m going to take aim at the huntsman’s cock. Dear God – if I hit the huntsman’s cock then that means Tom gets to touch the hen girl’s tit, if I miss then that means it’ll be some other person’s tit he touches – for example, his own.
The second Archer fires.
— Thigh.
— Bollocks.
— Sorry.
— That’s quite a disappointment.
— Still – hold on though – there’s no reason to think it might not be another good-looking woman’s tit you get a hold of –
— I suppose so.
— And – also – there’s nothing in what God’s telling us to say you won’t get a touch of the hen girl’s arse.
— I know, but –
— The events of tonight contain as many possibilities as there are stars.
— Still.
I had my eye on her tits all week.
— My go for a wish now. What should I aim for?
— The kid’s face.
— The kid’s face. All right.
— Right in the mouth.
— Dear God, please make it that if I hit the kid’s face right in the mouth then …
— What?
— Then make it that I get to touch the hen girl’s tit.
— You bastard.
The second Archer fires. He hits the kid’s mouth.
— God’s sending us a very clear message, my friend.
— Your go.
The first Archer raises his bow.
— What’s your target?
— Christ’s hat.
— What are you asking for?
— Justice.
The Archer points.
Egham enters.
The arrow points directly at Egham.
Egham Jesus!
— Sorry, Sir.
Egham You could have – you should have – issued a warning call.
— Sorry.
Egham A clear shout.
— Sorry.
Egham It’s just arrows. I don’t like – after my –
— Sorry, Sir.
Egham Here – here’s the money from last time. I’ve got another job for you.
— Sir?
Egham Gather four men and find the girl who looks after the hens. She’ll take you to her uncle. Walk with her through the forest. She knows the way. When you get there the uncle will give you a Scottish boy to look after. You’ll know him because he’ll have a tattoo – three snakes and a moon. Accompany the boy and the old man to the head of Glen Lyon. Leave them at the yew tree in Fortingall.
Be back by tomorrow and let no one know of the trip.
As usual.
— Yes.
The hen girl?
Egham Yes.
— Could I do that job? I would like to do that job.
Egham No – I’ve got a different job for you.
— What?
Egham Manure. Gather the manure from the stables, put it onto a cart. Sell it for whatever you can get.
Egham and the second Archer leave.
— Manure?
Bollocks.
I want justice.
The first Archer fires. He misses.
Bollocks, God!
What happened to justice!
*
Morning.
Siward and Gruach in bed together.
Gruach’s women, nearby the bed, are preparing food.
Siward What are they saying?
Siward What about?
Gruach Breakfast.
Siward I don’t like to be in the presence of people talking secretly.
Gruach You could learn our language.
Siward Your language is hard to learn.
Gruach We like it that way.
Siward Why?
Gruach Your English is a woodworker’s tool.
Siward.
Hello, goodbye, that tree is green,
Simple matters.
A soldier’s language sent out to capture the world in words.
Always trying to describe.
Throw words at the tree and eventually you’ll force me to see the tree just as you see it.
We long since gave up believing in descriptions.
Our language is the forest.
Siward Teach me.
Gruach speaks.
Gruach [Maybe you already speak our language.
Do you?]
Siward What did you say?
Gruach I asked you if you understood what I was saying.
Siward How do you say ‘yes’?
Gruach [No.]
Gruach Yes.
Siward Ask me again.
Gruach [Maybe you already speak our language.
Do you?]
Siward [No.]
Gruach’s women laugh.
Your women are laughing at me.
Gruach I’m sorry.
Siward Look at you smiling. You smiling and your women laughing at me. Which of us is really the conqueror here and which of us the conquered?
Gruach Oh, you’re the conqueror.
Siward Am I?
Gruach You invaded my country.
With your powerful army.
You took it.
Laid waste my land.
Burned.
Raped.
And now I’m your prisoner.
To do with as you will.
Gruach and her women laugh.
Siward You’re mocking me.
Gruach Trust my laughter if you hear it, Siward.
I only laugh with men I like.
Siward What if I don’t hear laughter?
Gruach I’m laughing behind your back.
Siward The chiefs are arriving for the parliament.
We have to be ready.
Gruach They can wait.
Siward I have to go.
Gruach I. Have. To. Go.
Your words thump like a fat man on stilts.
There is a dance of leaving – Siward.
Try to learn the steps.
Siward Look at you.
Beautiful bird.
You have your claws in my wrist.
Gruach Take off my ties then. and let me find my quarry.
They kiss.
Siward Now I must cast you off.
Siward leaves the bed.
He gets dressed
*
The clan chiefs of Scotland and their entourages arrive in Dunsinane for the gathering. Gifts are exchanged. Protocols observed.
Macduff That’s Ross – he’s wearing the Moray colours – that’s a sign because the Morays have distrusted him for a long time. See how he embraces Golspie? Golspie’s with Moray too. Look at that – kisses – easy laughter.
Siward They’re friends.
Macduff They don’t trust each other.
Siward What?
Macduff If they trusted each other they wouldn’t need to demonstrate it.
Siward You know this?
Macduff Yes.
Siward Then – but – if it can so easily be seen then –
Macduff It’s a demonstration for your benefit, not mine. Now look there – this is Macneill. He’s come from the islands. See the way he stands apart. They’ve been sent on behalf of Macleod and the Lordship of the Isles.
Siward I should introduce myself.
Macduff No.
Siward But he’s an ambassador.
Macduff They sent Macneill as a messenger in fact because everyone knows that the Coll – Macleod’s brother – is staying with his wife’s family nearby in Stirling. It’s Coll who should be here but Macleod’s sent Macneill. It’s a snub.
Siward A snub to whom?
Macduff You. The Isles are demonstrating their primary allegiance is to Norway, not to England. They want you to know how unimportant you are. That’s their message.
Siward But I didn’t – I don’t understand the message.
Macduff It’s not important that the message arrives, what matters is that it’s been sent.
Siward When do I speak?
Macduff I’ll call you at the end.
Macduff Malcolm.
The parliament has gathered.
Gruach enters.
All eyes on her.
She sits.
Malcolm rises.
Malcolm Look at you.
Dull.
Every time I try to become excited by the prospect of ruling this country the truth comes sidling in to put out whatever flames of passion my patriotic sentiments might have managed to kindle and my heart feels cold again. You’re all thieves. Thieves and the sons of thieves. Mothered by whores. I don’t mean anything insulting by saying this – unless the truth is insulting.
It’s a country of your making. I’ve just come back to it.
If you make me king I promise you one thing only – total honesty. In that spirit I offer you the following. I will govern entirely in the interests of me. In so far as I give consideration to you it will be to calibrate exactly how much I can take from you before you decide to attempt violence against me. I will periodically and arbitrarily commit acts of violence against some or other of you – in order that I can maintain a more general order in the country. I will not dispose my mind to the improvement of the country or to the conditions of its ordinary people. I will not improve trade. I will maintain an army only in order to submit you to my will. As far as foreign powers are concerned I will submit to any humiliation in order to keep the friendship of England.
There are some positives.
So I imagine I will hold big dances.
I like music and singing so when I visit you in your several castles you can look forward to having a good time for many days in a row.
And, most important of all, you need not waste even a minute of your long cold nights wondering about whether you are in or out of my favour. You are out of my favour. Now and always.
Macduff We thank Malcolm for speaking. He’s spoken clearly and he’s been heard. Now I invite McAlpin of Alba to speak on behalf of his people.
Siward He’s not made himself popular.
Macduff It’s fine.
Most of the chiefs don’t speak English.
The ones that do know he’s joking.
Siward Why would he joke about his own kingship?
Macduff So we understand he’s telling the truth.
Siward What is it – a joke or the truth?
Macduff Both.
Don’t worry.
McAlpin rises to speak.
McAlpin The Scots chiefs here know my position, I need not rehearse what we all already know so I will instead address my words to England.
The old tyrant is gone but his queen is still alive. This woman has the blood on her hands of countless of our people. This woman used every means at her disposal to dominate our country. We come here invited to a gathering and we find that not only is she alive, she is comfortably installed in Dunsinane under the protection of England.
I speak from Appin and Sutherland and Tain and the people of Angus and the Kingdom of Fife. We have come here to say – install Malcolm as king and we will accept him but there can be no peace in Scotland as long as the Queen remains in Dunsinane.
Macduff We thank you, McAlpin, for speaking on behalf of your people. You’ve spoken clearly and you’ve been heard. Now I call on Earl Moray to speak on behalf of his people.
Siward He doesn’t leave much room for compromise.
Macduff There’s plenty room.
Siward ‘There can be no peace as long as the Queen remains in Dunsinane.’
It’s unequivocal.
Macduff It all depends on the definition of the words.
Siward Which words?
Macduff ‘Peace’, ‘Queen’, ‘remain’ and ‘Dunsinane’.
Moray Look at us. Here at the beck of an English commander. Is this Scotland now? Try to see us as our children will see us when they look back on this day in time to come. They would be humiliated. It should shame us to kneel before an invader, but it seems we have no shame left. We in Moray will never accept Malcolm as king. The royal line passes through the Queen to her son. Wherever he is – hiding in whichever cave or castle – the Queen’s son is the rightful King and we’ll defend him to the death.
Macduff Thank you, Moray. You have spoken clearly and you have been heard. The last speaker I call is Lord Siward to speak on behalf of England.
Siward Scotland has been at war for many years. On either side there are parties with wounds and each party wants their wounds avenged and each act of vengeance is punished with vengeance and so if you do nothing now the war will continue until there is nobody left alive in Scotland and all that exists is the mountains and the empty land and the grudge that hangs above it.
In the last months I’ve travelled to every part of the country and I’ve talked to you. I know that there are those who cannot accept the Queen’s son as king. I know there are those who can never accept Malcolm as king.
So England proposes a marriage.
Let the Queen marry Malcolm.
Let the Queen’s son be Malcolm’s heir.
Let the two great houses of Scotland be united.
Macduff What does Malcolm say?
Malcolm I’m a little … taken aback.
But.
Impressed.
England, you are subtler than I thought.
McAlpin Would this arrangement be enforced by England?
Siward We would enforce it.
McAlpin Is this arrangement the preferred arrangement of England?
Siward It is.
Macduff What does the party of Moray say?
Moray Sister.
Did you know about this proposal?
Moray [What should I say?]
Silence.
Macduff The proposal put before the Queen is clear.
What do you say?
Gruach I accept.
Macduff Scotland is decided.
Let us prepare to celebrate a wedding.
Music is played.
Gruach leaves the hall.
Siward follows her.
Siward I had no choice.
Gruach Nor I – it seems.
Siward This way brings peace.
And now – at least – you are Queen again.
Gruach I was never not Queen.
Siward No.
Gruach You’re ashamed.
Aren’t you?
That makes it worse.
Siward This is the best way for Scotland.
And you know that.
You have accepted.
Haven’t you?
Gruach I have accepted my fate.
I wish it could have been different.
Gruach So do I.
A moment.
Siward The song they’re singing.
What is it?
Gruach A wedding song.
Siward What does it say?
Gruach It calls out to the relatives of the bride.
It tells them there is a wedding.
It says she needs attendants.
It asks them to come.
In great number.
*
Gruach is prepared for a wedding.
The Great Hall is laid for a feast.
Gruach Boy –
Boy Soldier Yes, Ma’am.
Gruach Tell them I’m ready.
Boy Soldier Yes, Ma’am.
The Boy Soldier goes to leave.
Gruach Boy.
Boy Soldier Yes, Ma’am.
Gruach How do I look?
The Boy Soldier considers.
Boy Soldier Magical.
You’re learning.
The Hall.
Noblemen and women dance a formal dance.
Malcolm invites Gruach to dance.
She dances with him.
Siward watches.
The dance ends.
Applause.
The hall doors open.
Egham Sir – there’s a problem, Sir.
Scottish Soldiers enter the hall, weapons raised.
They are covered in blood.
Macduff Where are the guards?
Egham Dead, Sir.
Siward What do they want?
Gruach They are mine.
They have come for me.
Gruach walks towards them and out of the hall.
The Scottish Soldiers attack the crowd.
The crowd defend themselves.
The hall is full of fire and slaughter.
*
No one saw how the Queen’s men entered Dunsinane.
The doors opened silently and afterwards we found that
All our sentries had been cut at the throat – but
However her men came the mysterious thing was her leaving,
How calmly she walked towards them – these blood- covered men –
And whether their coming came of witchcraft or of treachery
Or some combination of the two – as the great hall filled up
With fire and blood one thought filled the room like smoke.
She knew – she knew – she knew.
Siward puts on his armour.