5
Relaxation and Meditation

Stress … we've mentioned it several times already, and there's a good chance it's one of the reasons you're reading this book. Stress is a major factor in our need for the daily calming and healing effects of Yoga. Yoga provides relief from stress through each of its different expressions—postures, breathing exercises, and especially relaxation and meditation.

What is the difference between relaxation and meditation? The distinction is subtle but significant. Relaxation is simpler. It usually involves relaxing the physical body, which can take place with an active mind, but ideally quiets the mind as well. It requires a degree of control over your mind and body, but it is not too difficult. Relaxation is usually something we do to feel better in the moment, like having a drink or watching TV Its effects don't extend very far beyond the actual relaxation time.

Meditation is a deeper, more intense technique in which the meditator seeks not only to reach a deep state of relaxation but also to quiet the mind, and maintain a higher state of being beyond the time of meditation. The process develops the deepest levels of concentration as the practitioner becomes conscious of his or her own awareness and tries to transcend it. Meditation seeks a state of enlightenment, a freedom from the tyranny of our worries. It can be challenging to learn to reach a true state of meditation, but it provides the deepest level of physical and mental relaxation and, consequently, is the most effective for stress reduction.

In this chapter we'll look first at relaxation, then at meditation, giving a few basic techniques for each. Now is the time to think about setting aside ten to fifteen minutes each day to begin practicing these skills. You won't regret it.

RELAXATION

In Sanskrit, the word for relaxation is shaithilya(SHY-theel-yah), which translates to “loosening.” You can think of relaxation as loosening up your tension, smoothing out all the kinks in your physical, emotional, and mental state. There is much more to relaxation than just “doing nothing.” It involves a conscious effort to release your body of any effort. Sounds paradoxical, and it is; that's why relaxation is a skill to be cultivated.

When you're getting ready to begin relaxation exercises, try to be in a quiet environment where you're unlikely to be disturbed. Wear appropriate clothing to make sure you are comfortable and just the right temperature—you don't want to be too warm or too cold. In addition, don't practice on a full stomach. After a heavy meal, wait two to three hours.

Relaxation Techniques

The Quickie

Of all the relaxation techniques, the Quickie is the simplest and the fastest. According to Yoga's esoteric anatomy, the left nostril is part of the “channel of comfort,” which is one of the three main energy flows in the human body It is associated with the energy of the moon. Simply breathing deeply into the left side will often create a calming effect.

Sit comfortably in a chair with your back straight.

Bring your right elbow close to your rib cage and block the right side of your nostril with your right thumb, or use the hand position recommended for Alternate Nostril Breathing.

Breathe slowly and deeply through the left nostril only, for 3 to 5 minutes. Make your breath a little longer than normal, and be sure to pause after the inhale and the exhale.

When you're finished, bring the right hand down, let your breath come back to normal, and get up slowly.

Stress Buster

The Stress Buster relaxation technique is especially good for that stressful time in the afternoon at the office, or just before bed to help you go to sleep. If you are at the office, close the door to ensure privacy Wherever you are, turn off the phone and do what you can to prevent disturbances. You will need a chair, a small towel or eye bag to cover your eyes, and one or two blankets.

  1. Lie on your back on the floor with your feet up on the seat of a chair. Make sure that your legs are about hip-width apart and supported by the seat of the chair all the way to the back of your knees.

  2. If your head tilts back, place a blanket under your head. Cover your eyes with a towel or eye bag. Unless the room is warm, cover your body with a blanket from neck to toes.

  3. Bring your focus to your belly. Breathing through the nose as you inhale, expand the belly slowly in all directions (top, bottom, sides). Once you are comfortable with Belly Breathing, begin to gradually increase the length of your exhalation until you reach your comfortable maximum. (Inhale freely, exhale forever.)

  4. Repeat for 5 to 10 minutes. When you are finished, let your breath come back to normal, and rest for at least 1 minute before getting up.

Healing Triangles

Relaxation techniques such as this one involve directing your awareness to specific parts of your body which means you have to control your thoughts. In this way some relaxation exercises come close to resembling meditation.

  1. Sit in a chair comfortably with your back straight.

  2. Take a few deep breaths and then settle in to your normal breathing through your nose.

  3. Bring your focus mentally to the middle of your forehead and begin to draw a mental triangle between your forehead and the palms of both hands. See the triangle in your mind and if any part is difficult to connect (usually the bottom), spend some time there and then try to reconnect the entire triangle. Stay for 15 breaths. Then release the triangle and breathe normally.

  4. When you are comfortable with one triangle, see if you can hold the triangle in your mind and then at the same time mentally connect a second triangle using your navel and the big toes of both feet.

  5. Try to hold both of the triangles for 3 to 5 minutes. Release the first triangle, then the second and breathe normally.

  6. As a long-range goal, once you can hold two triangles in your mind try for a third. Mentally connect with a point of light just above your head (sometimes called an infinity point). See the light separating and going down the outside of your body below your feet. The third triangle surrounds the other two. The third triangle may be very large, or close to your body. When you reach the point of holding three triangles, try to continue for 5 to 20 minutes.

This exercise is not easy and takes time to learn. The more you practice, the easier it will be, as in the process of building up a muscle. You may notice colors forming in the triangles, or sensations inside of the triangles—mental, emotional, or physical. Just observe. When you are ready to end the exercise, release the triangles in the order you created them. Then let the breath come back to normal and relax for a while.

Yoga Nidra

Yoga Nidra literally means “Yoga sleep.” Although there are many variations of Yoga Nidra, the most popular is used to facilitate a deep state of relaxation, which is very conducive to healing. When they are not otherwise engaged, the systems of the body are free to replenish and heal. Think of Yoga Nidra as a natural tranquilizer, leading to mental, physical, and emotional harmony. Although Yoga Nidra can be practiced anytime and anywhere, the best times are early morning and just before sleep.

Yoga Nidra traditionally incorporates a positive affirmation, a visualization, and a systematic rotation of consciousness to specific parts of the body. Before practicing the routine, consider having someone read the copy to you while you do the relaxation, or record yourself reading the instructions. (It will be difficult to relax fully if you are trying to read at the same time.) Later you will be able to do the routine from memory. An excellent source on Yoga Nidra is available by Richard Miller (see Resource Guide).

  1. Preparation: Lie on your back comfortably in the Corpse pose—bring your arms across your chest and hug yourself. Now let your elbows come down to the floor, then let the forearms and the back of your hands flop down to a comfortable place with palms up. Slowly turn your head from side to side and then back to the middle.

  2. Close your eyes. Take a few deep breaths through the nose and then continue normal breathing through the nose.

  3. First resolve: Either mentally or verbally make a sincere statement about improving your health or your life, while continuing to breathe normally. Pause before moving on to the next mental step. (Each pause in this exercise should last about 10 seconds.)

  4. Visualization: As you inhale, visualize the healing rays of the sun warming and healing your entire body or, specifically, an injured or affected area. As you exhale, visualize darkness, impurities, and ill-health leaving the body.

  5. Repeat for 15 to 30 breaths. Then slowly bring your focus back to the moment.

  6. Rotation of consciousness: Bring your attention to the bottom of your feet and begin to relax your toes one at a time, beginning with the big toes on both feet, then the next toe, the next, the next, and the little toe. Pause. Release your ankles and then your knees. Mentally go inside of your knees and look around. Visualize tendons and ligaments. Imagine the kneecaps from underneath. Breathe into your knees and mentally instruct your knees to relax. Pause. Move your focus to your thighs and begin to visualize breathing into your thighs. Deeper, deeper until you reach the hamstrings underneath. Visualize the hamstrings releasing, relaxing, letting go. Pause. Now release the hips into the floor. Just let go. Pause. Bring your focus to your lower back. Think about the connection with your lower back, the floor, and the earth. Pause. Bring that same connection to the middle and upper back.

  7. Breathe into any tight spots (or visualize your prana flowing to these places). If you feel any tension, let it go. Pause. Surrender your shoulders down through the arms, down through the hands, and out through your fingertips. Pause. Release the back of your head and all of the tight spots behind the ears. Pause. Move your attention to your face, starting with the tight spot between the eyes. Now relax the muscles around your eyes, the nose, and the mouth. Release the mouth, the tongue, the spot below the tongue, just let it go. Pause.

  8. (Option) You can repeat the rotation sequence (Steps 6 and 7) 1 to 3 more times, depending on the time you have available and how deeply you want to relax.

  9. Remember the feeling: Take a few moments to think about how you're feeling right now, in your body and in your mind. Try to hold this feeling so that you will remember it later. Wiggle your toes and fingers, open the eyes a little, then a little more. Bring your arms overhead and stretch out. Roll to one side and stay there for a while. When you come up, let your head be the last thing to rise up. Use your hands, arms, and forearms to push up into a sitting position, and then relax until you are ready for your next activity.

MEDITATION

If someone offered you a quick do-it-yourself drug-free way to lower stress and reduce pain, would you be interested? With stress and pain under control, many people report improved memory, concentration, creativity, and productivity. These may sound like the some of the same benefits of Yoga you've already read about in this book. But meditation offers these advantages without requiring exercise. Great results can be achieved in only ten to twenty minutes of meditation a day or several sessions a week. Meditation does not require any special props, equipment, or clothing, plus—like Yoga breathing and relaxation—once the skill is acquired, you can take it with you anywhere.

Is meditation a required part of your Yoga practice? Not necessarily, but if you're reading this book, you probably have health concerns; and like the Yoga breathing discussed in Chapter 4 and the relaxation exercises presented in this chapter, meditation is just one more powerful tool for restoring your body to optimum health. Meditating brings you into a deep state of calm, soothing the central nervous system and releasing the mind from worries. This encourages your systems to work at their full capacities to help your body heal itself.

By now you're catching on to the possible benefits of meditation, but now we must direct your attention to the fine print: There's nothing easy about it. If you aren't accustomed to sitting quietly and doing absolutely nothing except being with yourself, even a short meditation can seem as tough as a climb up Mount Everest. You will probably encounter the gremlins, the ones that make your nose itch, your back ache, your brain race, and your foot fall asleep—all the little things that will drive you to distraction. Like any worthy endeavor, meditation requires commitment, patience, and a healthy measure of perseverance.

After ten years of learning and teaching Yoga, I asked a great meditation teacher to help me develop a deeper meditation practice. I decided to focus on meditating during one of my annual trips to the garden island of Kauai. My teacher's most important bit of advice was simple: No matter how distracted the mind is, be patient and sit three times a day, beginning with five minutes and working toward a goal of thirty minutes at a time.

On the first morning, I plunged in, telling myself, “I am going to sit here for half an hour if it kills me.” Well, it almost did! I couldn't believe how difficult it was to sit quietly for even five minutes. My mind was going everywhere, a common circumstance that I later learned is called “monkey mind.” But I remembered my teacher's advice. As challenging as it was, I sat there and focused on my breathing.

By the third day, I was learning to be more patient. I set smaller goals, and soon I was able to sit with a relatively quiet mind for five whole minutes. As I increased my goal in tiny increments, I found I was able to sit quietly for longer each session. When we approach our goals this way, things that might have seemed unthinkable become real possibilities.

A meditative state is often compared to a tranquil body of water, such as a placid lake or pond. What is less often said, however, is that once tranquility is achieved, it doesn't necessarily guarantee that only calm or positive feelings come to the surface. To extend the lake analogy, there may very well be debris at the bottom that floats up in the form of negative thoughts or feelings, perhaps anger, resentment, or discontent. When you first try meditation, you might also feel bored, sleepy, or a general discomfort. This is a common response; try to acknowledge those thoughts and feelings without judging them. It's all part of the journey leading us to the ultimate goal of meditation: to quiet our minds enough to hear our inner voice, seek true wisdom, and experience our deepest intuition. Along the way to these somewhat lofty ideals, remember that simple meditation and relaxation techniques are among the best ways to manage stress.

Meditation Techniques

Meditation can take years to master, but you don't have to be an expert to reap rewards. You will see benefits even if you never progress past these three basic meditation techniques: Focused, Open-Ended, and Mantra.

Focused Meditation

Focused Meditation is a technique in which you direct your awareness onto something. It could be an object like a picture or statue of a deity; a universal principle such as compassion or forgiveness; or a symbol such as om,the famous Hindu mantra.

You can try Focused Meditation right now. Just be aware that this elementary exercise isn't as easy as it seems, so be patient and compassionate with yourself.

One of the favorite objects of meditation is your own breath. It's certainly convenient, and the Yogis maintain it's a direct channel to your authentic self.

  1. Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and begin to focus on your inhalation and your exhalation.

  2. As you inhale through your nose, count to yourself, “One.” Exhale. Then, on the next inhale, count, “Two,” And so on. After each inhalation, try to hold your breath for one short beat before the exhalation. That short, quiet pause may serve as a doorway into meditation because at that point you are close to stillness.

How high can you count before you lose track of the count completely? Be honest with yourself. Don't be shocked if you forget the count fairly quickly. Just go back to square one and start again. Keep trying until you can count straight through to ten, and if you get to ten, go back and count to ten again. Notice what happens to your breath as you focus on it for increasingly longer counts, and what effect this has on your awareness. Strengthening your ability to focus is just like strengthening a muscle. The more you exercise your awareness, the stronger it gets.

Open-Ended Meditation

Open-Ended Meditation is a technique in which there's no particular object of meditation. The meditator just opens up to his or her own inner experience and simply observes whatever arises, without identifying with or judging that experience.

Again, it's not hard to begin this kind of meditation, though at first it is difficult to stay with it for more than a minute or so.

  1. Sit comfortably and close your eyes. Bring your awareness to your thoughts, feelings, fantasies, desires, memories—whatever comes up for you. Don't get attached to what comes up, and don't try to direct it, just be an observer and witness to it all.

  2. As you progress and are able to hang on to this open-ended awareness for longer periods of time, notice what happens to the usual flood of contents that continually swirls around inside your head. Practice this until you feel comfortable maintaining it for at least 5 minutes.

Mantra Meditation

In Sanskrit, the man in mantra means “to think,” and the tra suggests “instrumentality.” Mantra literally means an “instrument of thought.” The whole idea with mantra meditation is to repeat a word, phrase, or sound to transcend the constant distractions of the mind. The continuous repetition of a mantra is called japa. The concept of mantra can be found in many spiritual traditions, including Christianity, Hinduism, Buddhism, and Judaism. Millions of Americans were introduced to Mantra Yoga in the 1960s through the Transcendental Meditation (TM) movement founded by Maharishi Mahesh Yogi of India.

  1. To begin, choose a word, phrase, or a short sentence from a prayer or poem that inspires you. For example, you could choose the sentence, “Thou art with me,” from Psalm 23. Limit your mantra to three or four words at the most.

  2. Sit quietly in a chair with your back up straight. Close your eyes or half close them, gazing downward. Take a few deep breaths through the nose.

  3. When you're ready, say the mantra you have chosen during your exhale. Continue to inhale through your nose, and repeat your mantra out loud on each exhalation, for 5 to 10 minutes.

You will have more success with your concentration if you can hear yourself verbalizing your mantra. After you've been practicing for some time, you may want to begin reciting the mantra very softly or even silently, as this is said to be the most powerful form of mantra meditation. Once you feel comfortable with the silent recitation, begin repeating the mantra mentally with your thoughts during both the inhale and the exhale. You can use this form of meditation for up to thirty minutes.