SESSION 3
America’s Most Unwanted
Getting Started
Before the Meeting
1. Pray for the students who will be attending the study. Pray by name for those you know are returning this week and pray for friends who might be invited to come this week. Ask God to help them come with minds ready to receive teaching and hearts ready to receive His Word and wisdom.
2. Watch session 3 of the DVD.
3. Work through the entire session on your own, answering the questions and thinking through how the material impacts you and your views of sexuality. As you prepare, ask God to give you creativity and a heart to listen.
4. You may want to prepare slips of papers with Bible references to be read during the meeting. When folks arrive, hand out the passages. Be sensitive to folks who may not like to read out loud.
5. Keep your eyes open during the week for messages in the media about sexuality.
6. Gather materials for study and be sure that all the technology is working. Check out the DVD player and arrange seating so that everyone will be able to comfortably see the TV.
7. Have Bibles and pencils or pens available for the students.
8. Play music and offer food to welcome the students when they arrive.
9. For the Doing the Truth activity, you’ll need a stack of magazines—you could call some students and ask them to bring some from home—as well as blank paper and glue sticks. If you decide to do the opening activity, you’ll need magazines for that, too.
Starting the Meeting
1. Just as you have in previous weeks, greet each student by name as he or she arrives. Remember that you are working to create an atmosphere of trust and honesty.
2. Once students have arrived, you can choose to open by either responding to one or two of the questions/concerns that students wrote on the index cards last week or by using the following activity:
Split the large group into smaller groups of three. Give each small group a small pile of magazines, a pair of scissors and two minutes to cut out images or words that present a message about sexuality. At the end of two minutes, lead a brief discussion by asking, “How many messages did you find? Was it hard or easy to find things? Are the words and images you found closer to The Naked Truth or more like dressed-up lies?”
3. At this point you may want to open the study with a brief prayer, or ask one of the students to pray.
In today’s study, the students will encounter much more specific information about sexually transmitted diseases. Unless they have had a very thorough health class or sex education class at school, a lot of this information may be new to them. A lot of it may be new to you as well. It will be very surprising to everyone to learn just how vulnerable our bodies are to infection. Be sure not to gloss over this information (although it may make you uncomfortable). Allow time for Lakita’s research and clear teaching to sink in!
Read together the opening paragraphs, asking a student or two who is willing to read a paragraph or two.
Introduction
In the recent Hollywood resurrection of the ’80s television classic Miami Vice, Sonny Crockett (played by Colin Farrel) and Rico Tubbs (played by Jamie Foxx) passionately pursue a ruthless drug lord, Archangel de Jesus Montoya-Londono, and his Cuban-Chinese banker, Isabella.
In the midst of the vicious war between drug traffickers and law enforcement, Sonny and Isabella begin a heated romance. The affair begins when the two enjoy his favorite drink, a Mojito, in a Cuban nightclub. After finishing the Mojito, Sonny and Isabella burn up the floor with a Latin dance that fills the air with sexual tension.
As sensual Cuban music wraps itself around their twisting bodies, imagine if film director Michael Mann instructed Sonny to lean over and whisper into Isabella’s ear:
“Before we head to the hotel room, I need to let you know that I’ve just finished my last treatment for genital warts, so I should be all clear. You’ve got nothing to worry about.”
Too much reality for Hollywood? Absolutely. That type of dialogue would never fly in a movie. Nobody wants to hear the words “genital warts” when considering sex.
Yet genital warts is on the top 10 list of the most common sexually transmitted diseases that infect people everyday. Sounds like a lot more people ought to hear the words “genital warts” when considering sex, or the words may be just the beginning of a long and miserable acquaintance.
Remember that the first step in making a wise choice is to know your options and their consequences.
In this study, Lakita will introduce to you information on a crime family known as “America’s Most Unwanted.” By the end of this lesson, you’ll probably know more than you ever wanted to know about sexually transmitted diseases. Lakita wants you to know the real dangers of multiple sexual partners (i.e., more than one) and not just the Hollywood illusion.
After all, if you had a friend who was going to do something that put him or her at risk, wouldn’t you tell your friend?
Now, let’s do a quick review from last week’s lesson.
Invite the students to take notes about their thoughts and questions while they watch the DVD. Expect some of the information to surprise many of the students and allow for enough time to discuss what they learned.
The Naked Truth with Lakita
As you prepare to listen to Lakita, take a moment to pray and ask that God would use this time to help you gain wisdom about the choices you make. Write down any thoughts or questions you have while Lakita talks. Here are a couple of questions to get you thinking:
What information in the video did you find most surprising?
Of all the STDs mentioned, which one would you want to live with? Do you know how to be certain you won’t have to?
In this video, you will hear some real stories from people who “sinned against” their bodies and contracted a sexually transmitted disease. After the video is shown, think about the following reflection questions:
How does listening to these testimonies affect how you feel about people who have an STD?
How do you think God feels about the people from the video?
What words of comfort do you think God would say to them?
What words of warning would He say?
Break up the group into small groups of three or four students and give them just a few minutes to work through the questions below. You want the students to begin thinking about why we often refuse to look at the warning signs and put ourselves at risk.
The Hook-Up
Describe a decision you have made that put you at risk.
In the situation you described above, if you had a friend or knew an adult who could tell you all the possible negative consequences, would you want to hear from them? Why or why not?
If you knew the possible negative consequences of a particular life choice and your friend was taking a huge risk without even knowing it, would you warn your friend? Why or why not?
In this next study of 1 Samuel 8, the students will learn that it’s not just individuals who want to fit in and be like everyone else. Nations also have the desire to have what others have and do what others do.
Begin by reading the opening paragraphs together.
The Gospel Truth
If you were alive in the 1990s and watched television, you became familiar with the phrase “Friends don’t let friends drive drunk.” The point was obvious: If you care about someone, you look out for that person. If you love someone, you warn them of the possible negative consequences of their actions. If you see them heading in the wrong direction, you do whatever it takes to help them make a good decision.
God shows His love for us through warnings, too.
Throughout the Bible, God warns His people against making foolish decisions. God desires that everyone experience a dynamic, passion-filled, abundant life. He even laid out a plan so that we could experience that kind of life, and His Word lets us know the consequences of a bad decision.
When God brought His people out of Egypt, He had a plan for them to be a great nation. Ultimately, it was out of this nation that God would bring the Savior of the world. God had big plans: He gave His people land, success against their enemies and leaders to guide them whenever there was a crisis. God provided everything. In those days, other nations had kings to protect the people, but God’s people didn’t need a king. They had God.
You can imagine, though, how hard it would be to wait on God for answers when the nations around you had flesh-and-blood kings to give them answers. As it turns out, God’s people eventually found themselves tired of waiting. They wanted a real king with whom they could speak openly.
Read the first and second Scripture passages below and answer the related questions together as a large group.
Read 1 Samuel 8:1-4.
What reasons did the elders of Israel give Samuel regarding their desire for a king?
From your perspective, is there anything wrong with wanting to be like everyone else? When could wanting to be like others damage or deepen your relationship with God?
Read 1 Samuel 8:6-9.
How does God respond to the elders’ request for a king?
Have someone read the following Scripture aloud and then answer the following questions together as a group.
Read 1 Samuel 8:10-21.
If you were one of the elders and you heard all the negative consequences that would result from having a king, would you still want a king?
Are you the type of person who can learn from just being told or do you need to experience things for yourself?
Why would God still give the people of Israel a king, even though He knew a king would not be best for them?
The people of Israel grew tired of being different. At some point, they simply wanted to be like everyone around them. God had delivered them from many battles, but they wanted a king to deliver them. They were tired of following God. They did not want to listen to God’s advice or warnings anymore.
In their desire for a king, the Israelites had forgotten one critical fact about God. They forgot that God loved them and wanted what was best for them. If only they had listened to His warning. Are you ready to heed the warnings you have heard about sex?
In the next activity, students are invited to select a picture of someone from a magazine and create a life story for that person. That life story must include the fact that the person is infected with a particular STD. The goal is for each student to think about what it would be like in real life to be infected. Students will need magazines, sheets of blank paper (for their story) and glue sticks to attach their person’s picture to the paper.
Let each student work alone and allow plenty of time. Be sensitive to the fact that if there are sexually active teens in the class, there may be a student who already has an STD. This exercise may be very difficult for them to sit through. You want to be sure to foster a trusting atmosphere and not allow other students to goof off and make jokes during this section. Remind them that these are real illnesses that affect others in serious ways.
Doing the Truth
Let’s get a little personal. It’s time for you to seriously consider what life would be like if you were infected with a sexually transmitted disease.
Let’s get started. From one of the magazines, select a picture and develop an STD story about the person. The story should include:
• A description of the STD and its symptoms
• A description of the short- and long-term consequences for the STD
• A description of the treatment
• The person’s name and what kind of relationship he or she has with God (e.g., committed to following God, doesn’t know God at all, goes to church but that’s about it, and so forth.)
If you need help with the details about STDs, refer to the following chart of America’s Most Unwanted. After you’ve created that portion of the STD story, read the situations below and incorporate your answer to the questions into your story.
The Usual Suspects
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La Familia Bacterial (Bacterial STDs)
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Medea
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a.k.a. Chlamydia
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Rhea
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a.k.a. Gonorrhea
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Phyllis
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a.k.a. Syphilis
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P-Deasy
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a.k.a. PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease)
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La Familia Viral (Viral STDs)
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G-Dub
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a.k.a. Human Papillomavirus (HPV)
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Herp
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a.k.a. Herpes
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Notorious HIV
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a.k.a. HIV/AIDS
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Gangs and Cell Groups
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The Crabs
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a.k.a. Pubic Lice
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Trixie
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a.k.a. Trichomoniasis
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First Situation
Imagine that you are the person with the STD. About three months after the diagnosis and initial treatment, you meet someone new and you begin dating. This time you decide to follow God’s plan for marriage and you do not have sex. Six months later, you decide to get married.
Describe how you would explain the STD to your future spouse.
Second Situation
Imagine that the STD story is about the person that you would like to marry. He or she tells you that he or she has an STD.
Describe your feelings and how you would handle the situation.
Come back together as a large group to talk about the reflection questions. Allow every student time to share, but be careful not to force sharing.
Describe the feelings you had when you imagined that you were the person with the STD. Now describe your feelings when you imagined that your future spouse had an STD.
How does this activity affect your beliefs about having sex before marriage?
The Big Finish
When God created you, He had a great plan for your life. His plan includes your finding someone to love deeply and passionately for a lifetime. Even though we live in a world filled with disease and circumstances beyond our control, there are choices you can make to experience an amazing sex life. Those choices include NOT having an STD.
Let’s review some of the basic information about STDs.
• Many STDs do not have visible signs.
• Some STDs have no cure.
• If you have one STD, you are more susceptible to contracting another one.
• Your risk of getting an STD goes up as you have more sex partners.
• The only way to know for sure if you have an STD is to get tested.
If you have had sex, you might have an STD. Since many STDs can go unnoticed, the only way you can be certain is to get tested. There are treatments available for STDs, but only some STDs are fully curable. For example, bacterial STDs can be treated and cured, whereas viral STDs can sometimes be treated but do not go away completely. A person infected with a viral STD must take the responsibility not to spread the disease. If those with viral STDs knowingly spread the disease, those persons may be at legal risk.
It’s worth it to get tested even if you’ve only had sex once. If you are not sure how to get tested or where to go, talk with an adult you trust.
Though not all treatments for STDs are 100 percent effective, God has the power to heal your body as well as your heart. If you’ve engaged in sexual activity and you truly want to repent (turn away from that behavior), God offers you complete forgiveness and the opportunity to start over. Getting tested could be a good, practical first step toward repentance.
As you come to the end of this lesson, take some time as a group to complete the following T-Chart to describe the negative consequences of having sex with more than one partner, and the positive consequences of living like your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit.
Coming to a Close
Take a few minutes at the end to thank the students for their seriousness and their sensitivity to the material today. Ask them if they have any questions for you. You may want to pass out index cards for students to write down concerns or questions. Assure them that you will keep their questions confidential if they wish or will answer them at the beginning of next week’s class if they prefer.
Encourage the class to seek out testing for STDs if they have been sexually active in the past. Remind them that they may not have symptoms but could still have an STD.
Close the meeting in prayer.
After the Meeting
1. Evaluate: Evaluate the meeting’s overall effectiveness. Take time to talk with your volunteer leaders about how God worked, what went well, what did not go well and what needs to be changed before the next meeting. Consider the particular students and what types of interaction would be best for them.
2. Encourage: Try to contact each student during the week (phone calls, notes of encouragement, e-mail or instant messages). Make yourself available to answer any questions they might have.
3. Equip: Complete the next lesson on your own. Remember to watch for what messages the students may be receiving through the media.
4. Pray: Prayerfully prepare for the next meeting. Pray for each student at least three times during the week.