The Schaeffers’ house is dark when Chasm and I pull into the driveway. I’m sitting in the passenger seat of his car, listening to the Emerald City Murder Podcast—because clearly, I am a masochist. Maxx has left to join the search party, helping me field texts and phone calls from Tess.

Yes, I’m with him. Yes, I’ll be home by ten. Yes, I’m safe.

He takes my Tess-given phone with him, too, so that if Tess tracks it, it’ll be exactly where it’s supposed to be.

“Do you trust him?” I ask Chas as he turns off the ignition and I stare down at my Maxine-provided phone. Maxine. Oh god. What have I done?

“I …” Chasm starts, cursing in Korean again. “I do. Like I said, he has strict morals. They’re not always what you think they’d be, but he doesn’t lie. If he says he won’t tell anyone, he won’t.” Chas glances over at me, his amber eyes catching the light from the car’s screen and turning them gold. “But we will have to give him a full rundown.”

He looks back toward the house as I check my phone one more time. Danyella isn’t responding to calls, texts, or social media messages. This is a last resort.

With one last deep inhale, I open the passenger side door of Chas’ sportscar and climb out. He stays right behind me, a comforting and simultaneously confusing presence at my back. I hate that I’ve realized I have a crush on him while Parrish is missing. It’s a weird feeling, crushing hard on two people at the same time. How do I deal with it? As of right now, I guess I just … don’t. Parrish is my only concern at the moment.

We knock on the front door and wait. Knock again. Chasm hits the doorbell several times.

“She isn’t home,” I realize with a sinking feeling in my gut.

“Don’t give up that easily,” Chasm tells me, gesturing with his chin toward the gate that leads to the backyard. “Come on.”

He guides me through the yard, reaching up and over the fence to grab the latch. The gate swings open and we slip through, getting drenched once again by the unrelenting downpour. Oh well. We were both soaked to the bone anyway, so what does it matter?

From the front, it really did appear that the house was dark and empty. From back here, I can see that Danyella’s bedroom light is on.

Huh.

Chasm doesn’t skip a beat, climbing the steps to the deck and brazenly grabbing the handles on the French doors that lead into the dining room.

They’re unlocked.

He makes a frustrated sound under his breath.

“Fucking serial killer in town and the door is unlocked? Come on.” He shoves the doors open, but I’m not quite so comfortable with breaking and entering into my friend’s house. I figure it’s best if we just call her name now so that she knows we’re here.

Chasm reaches out to grab my arm, squeezing hard and stopping me before I can say anything.

“What the hell did you want me to do?!”

It’s Lumen. And she’s pissed. And also … scared? Frustrated, maybe.

The faintest murmur of another voice drifts down the stairs, and I figure that must be Danyella.

“Yeah, well, he didn’t exactly offer that up as an option, now did he?” she growls out. “I don’t have a lot of choices, Danyella.”

The sound of footsteps on the stairs makes my stomach bottom out, and the urge to run is overwhelming. Chasm holds his ground, waiting as Lumen appears in the kitchen, swiping tears from her face and snatching a bottle of liquor from Danyella’s parents’ stash.

She takes a huge swig before her eyes drift our way and widen. She chokes on the alcohol, sputtering and coughing as she swipes an arm over her mouth.

“What the hell?” Lumen asks, looking between me and Chasm, both of us soaking wet and standing in Danyella’s dining room. “Um. Did you guys just break in?”

“Did you just ignore us hitting the doorbell a hundred times for fun? I know you saw us on the doorbell cam. Just didn’t give a shit that we really needed to talk to Danyella?”

Lumen looks at Chasm and then swings her brown eyes over to me.

It occurs to me then that she woke up in a field with supposedly no memory of how she got there. Sort of … like how I woke up in my bed after being attacked by two men in the woods? Woods that looked suspiciously like the ones outside of Chasm’s dad’s guesthouse.

Oh.

The Fort Humboldt Security thing.

Shit.

I need to sit down and gather my thoughts, go over my spreadsheet again. There’s so much going on; I feel completely overwhelmed. Which, I think, is sort of the point of all this.

“Maybe you just didn’t give a shit that Danyella and I needed a moment alone?” Lumen counters, switching her gaze back to Chasm and sighing. She dangles the liquor bottle by the neck. “You guys want something to drink?”

“What’s going on down here?” Danyella asks, appearing in the kitchen entrance with her hot pink glasses perched on the end of her nose. She doesn’t seem overly surprised to see me and Chasm in her dining room. “Are you guys okay? I’m sorry we didn’t answer the door, but we’re sort of in the middle of something.”

“We just broke into your house,” I say, but she doesn’t seem fazed. “We’re the ones who should be sorry.”

It won’t be the only thing I’m apologizing for tonight. Mr. Volli—via the Slayer—told me that if asked, I had to blame my reasons for setting the theater on fire on Tess. He never said that I couldn’t tell Danyella how genuinely sorry I am for doing it.

“You must really need to talk to us then,” Danyella says, giving Lumen a look. They exchange a long, intense sort of stare before Danyella redirects her gaze to me. “Should I order in? We could have dinner.”

“I need to talk to you,” I say as Chasm closes and locks the back doors.

“We need to talk to you,” he corrects, and then turns around to level a dark stare on both girls. “Also, are you guys nuts? Parrish is missing, the Seattle Slayer is in town, and you left the back door unlocked?”

“Yeah, sorry, that was my bad,” Lumen admits with a loose shrug of her shoulders. Her blond hair waves gently around her face, and her makeup is flawless as usual, but there’s something else in her expression, a darkness in her gaze that bothers me. “What’s up?” She saunters over to the table and pulls out a chair, flopping into it with the alcohol bottle still in her hand.

Danyella watches her for a minute before grabbing a seltzer water from the fridge.

“You guys sure you don’t want anything?”

I can’t take it anymore. The words are crouched just behind my lips, clawing at my heart and soul with wicked fingers. I just need to get this out there or else I won’t be able to do it at all.

“I set the fire in the theater,” I blurt, adrenaline spiking my blood as I step forward and curl my hands over the back of one of the dining chairs.

“We set the fire,” Chasm corrects yet again, taking responsibility when he really doesn’t have to. Why is he being so … great? I mean, I like it. But I like it too much. That’s not okay. He moves to stand beside me, shoulder to shoulder.

“I’m sorry, what?” Lumen queries, setting the bottle down hard on the table as she blinks at us in confusion. “What are you guys talking about?”

“We poured gasoline on the props, and we flicked the wheel on a lighter, and we started the blaze.” I’m looking at Danyella, not Lumen, but she hasn’t moved since I made my statement. She’s still standing with one hand on the handle of the fridge door, the other clutching the cold can of her seltzer. “I’m so sorry, Danyella. I …” I trail off, tears pricking at my eyes. I really don’t want to cry yet again today, but it’s been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. “I didn’t want to do it, and I’m sorry. More than I could ever say with words.”

Lumen stands up from table so suddenly that her chair falls over and hits the floor. She’s just … staring at the pair of us like she’s never seen us before.

“Why would you do that?” she breathes, searching my face, searching Chasm’s face. “Kwang-seon, what the hell? Danyella worked her ass off all year for that production. So many people had their dreams crushed by that fire.”

Chasm exhales and glances down at me, but I can’t tear my eyes away from Danyella. She offered me friendship within seconds of meeting me. Non-judgmental friendship with no strings attached. She’s been kind and inclusive and generous with her time, offering me a part in the drama club, letting me stay over here and use her to lie to Tess.

How did I repay her? By burning down everything that mattered.

“We don’t expect you to believe how sorry we are,” Chasm tells them, tucking his hands into his blazer pockets and looking down at the table’s shiny surface. I finally break my stare with Danyella and glance his way. If I’m hurting, he must be doubly in pain. He’s known these girls since he was nine years old. They were his friends far before they were ever mine.

“Please leave,” Danyella chokes out finally, slamming the fridge door.

“I’m sorry, and I love you,” I tell her, putting my hands over my chest as she turns suddenly and then throws the seltzer as hard as she can against the far wall. It hits and dents the wall, exploding and spraying fizzy liquid everywhere.

“Get out,” she seethes, her voice low and weird and dangerous. “Just get out.”

“Little Sister.” Chasm grabs my arm and gives me a shake, dragging me toward the front door. Lumen watches us go with an inscrutable expression, her brown eyes tracking me as I pass. She blinks once, hard and intentional, and I swear, it feels like she’s trying to tell me something. I have no idea what it is, but I file the expression away for later.

As soon as we get outside, Chasm closes the door behind us, and I hear the dead bolt click into place a few seconds later.

“Jesus, that was messed up,” he breathes, but I don’t respond. I’m too shell-shocked to form any sort of reply.

I’ve just lost my only female friends in all of Whitehall. One of whom is the queen bee. And the king of the school? He’s still missing.

I might be in trouble here.

“Thank you,” I tell Chasm, looking up at him and wishing that I had more to say, more to offer.

“You’re welcome,” he replies, sighing heavily and then moving around the car to open my door for me.

I should ask him about his father’s security firm. About the woods. About …

Instead, I push all of that aside and text Justin Prior immediately.

It’s done. I told Danyella. I want to see a picture of Parrish in the bed.

The response comes almost immediately.

And you’ve added another pawn to this game. Maxx Wright. Interesting choice. You’ve managed to surprise me more than once this week. That is not something that is easily done.

I turn the phone screen off and lay my head back against the seat.

I must fall asleep without realizing it because the next thing I know, I’m waking up and we’re pulling into the Vanguard’s garage.

Crap.

Crap, crap, crap.

Chasm was supposed to take me back to Maxx so that he could bring me home. Chas isn’t supposed to be here. Tess isn’t exactly thrilled with him at the moment.

“It’s okay,” Chasm tells me, putting the car in park and turning off the engine. He glances my way as I struggle out of a thick, heavy cloud of exhaustion. “This was unavoidable.”

He climbs out of the car, and I follow after, heading into the house to find Tess in the living room. She has a bottle of wine in her right hand, her eyes dazed and staring at nothing. I’m not the only person in this house who had a hard day, that’s for sure.

She lifts her head up like she’s climbing out of a mental fog, her attention focusing immediately on Chasm. A frown flits across Tess’ pretty mouth.

“Kwang-seon.” Just that. His name and nothing else. He’s in huge trouble. “What are you doing here?” Tess turns her attention over to me. “You were supposed to come home with Maxx.”

“I was helping with the search party,” Chasm explains, holding up both hands, palms out, as if he knows how dangerous this scenario is becoming. “I offered to take Dakota home so we could talk.”

“And nobody thought to inform me about what my daughter might be doing?” Tess asks, sounding a bit hysterical. She takes another swig of the wine, staining her teeth purple for a brief moment. “A text or a phone call letting me know about the change of plans would’ve been appreciated.”

“That was my fault,” I offer, stepping forward and hoping to defuse the situation somewhat. “I fell asleep as soon as I climbed in the car. I’m just … I’m exhausted, Tess.”

There must be something in my voice that catches a bit of that strange sympathy Tess showed me last night. But just a bit.

“Every time the two of you are together, I lose my daughter.” She points at Chasm with the wine bottle. “You took her from the TV studio and disappeared; you cut class together yesterday and nearly gave me a heart attack. Now this?” She gives a harsh, strangled sort of laugh. She’s very clearly drunk and suffering right now. I can’t hold any of this against her. “Kwang-seon, I’ve known you for a long, long time now. You’re practically one of my children.”

“I know,” he says, sounding hurt, needy in a way I’ve never heard before. He really does love this family, and I’d never forgive myself if I ever did anything to mess that up. He moves forward to crouch beside Tess, putting his hand on her knee. “I’m sorry, Tess. I really am. The last thing in the world I’d ever want to do is hurt you or anyone else in this family. You know that I love you guys.”

“How could you do that?” Tess demands, getting sniffly as she reaches out and cups the side of Chasm’s face. “Treat my daughter like … Well, like you treat all the other girls you date. She isn’t a conquest, another notch on your belt.”

God, the way Chas’ shoulders tighten up, the way he hangs his head, I want to scream. I want to just cup my hands around my mouth and yell it out for the world to hear: I slept with my stepbrother, and I don’t care because I love him, and I miss him, and he’s dying right now. He’s dying and there are more important things to worry about.

But I don’t. Because it won’t help. I know Chasm would rather endure this than hurt Tess or Parrish or … me. I’m okay with sacrificing myself, but I can’t do that to Tess and Parrish, not now.

“I promise that I don’t think of her like that, Tess,” he says, adopting a cajoling tone that I’ve never heard before, soothing some of her drunken anger away with his voice. “I really like Dakota. She’s smart, and she’s a fast learner. She cares about other people in a way that blows my mind.” He glances back at me, but I can’t decide if he’s just saying those things to appease Tess or if he means them.

I swallow a lump of pain, and squeeze my hands into fists in the wet pleats of my skirt.

Chasm turns back to Tess as she puts her face in her hand and starts to cry.

“I just want my son back,” she sobs, and my heart shatters.

All this time, I’ve been so focused on DNA and blood and legalities and … I didn’t give enough credence to the fact that Tess loved me. That she carried me inside of her, gave birth to me, cared for me for nearly two years, and then lost me through no fault of her own. It isn’t just DNA that convinced her to uproot my life and drag me here: it was love.

Parrish is not Tess’ biological son and yet …

“Oh god, Chasm.” Tess is weeping now, completely and utterly stripped bare. It’s such a contrast to her mood from last night. I didn’t recognize her then, and I most certainly don’t recognize her now.

I don’t know this woman at all, do I?

Paul comes into the room with a bag of takeout in his hand, his eyes widening when he sees the state his wife is in. He drops the bag to the floor and rushes over to her as Chasm stands up and moves aside. Paul sweeps Tess into his arms, and I look away.

This isn’t something we need to see.

Chasm and I leave the room and then pause awkwardly together near the stairs.

Should I invite him up? Is Tess still going to be angry with him in the morning or will she forgive him?

“My dad will lose his shit if I don’t get home soon,” he explains, and I exhale a small sigh of relief. Not because I want him to leave. Quite the opposite, in fact. But at least his admission saves us the uncomfortable conversation.

“I really appreciate everything you’re doing for me,” I tell him earnestly, wishing I could express myself in a more eloquent way. Wishing I could tell him how sad I am that those sunflowers are dying. Or how much the sight of his face outside of Parrish’s bedroom that day haunts me.

Before I can second-guess myself, I throw my arms around him and give him a Banks family signature squeeze. That’s our thing back home, big, strong hugs that envelop the body as well as the soul. I’m pretty sure that Chasm doesn’t get hugged nearly enough.

Or maybe at all.

“God, Little Sister,” he chokes out, putting his hand on my upper back. “You’re going to make me get all teary and whatever.” He rubs my back in slow, comforting circles as we both shiver in our damp clothes and miss our friend so bad that we ache in unison, that we hurt together. It still isn’t fun to be in this much pain, but it’s a hell of a lot more bearable when there’s someone around to share it with.

“Keep being you. It works.” I pull away from him only to find that he’s looking down at me with an expression that I feel like I’ve seen before on someone else. On Parrish. Chasm is staring at me the way Parrish did on that last day, when I kissed him and reluctantly slipped away to my own room.

The sound of a car pulling into the garage draws us both out of whatever trance we were just in.

Maxx comes in fairly quickly after, tossing his keys in the air and catching them. He pauses when he sees us both waiting there.

“I have to get home; Seamus is not in a great mood today.” Chasm looks away sharply, and I remember the bruises I saw on his arms earlier today. The thought of that man throwing Chas around makes me see red. “Don’t bother Dakota too much, okay? We can all sit down together tomorrow and talk.”

“Take care of yourself,” Maxx tells him, which isn’t so much an agreement as it is a careful avoidance of the subject. “Drive safe and text me when you get home, okay?”

“Sure, Mom,” Chas says with a roll of his pretty amber eyes. He offers me up another half-smile before disappearing out the door and into the garage.

Now, it’s me and Maxx having a weird, uncomfortable rendezvous at the base of the stairs.

He meets my eyes without flinching.

“I knew you were good,” he says, which makes me smile. That exact line is in the English dubbed version of Spirited Away which, as we know from my soot spirit pen, is one of my favorite movies of all time. In a strange way, Maxx reminds me of the dragon in that movie. “I knew it.”

I raise a brow but then find myself forced to stifle a yawn because I’m exhausted beyond all reason.

“You knew it, so it must’ve been true, huh?” I ask, and Maxx gives me a loose shrug of his shoulders. His face is relatively impassive, but I can see the desperation just behind his eyes. He deserves to hear about what’s happening. He deserves to know. I lean in to whisper, even though I can still hear Tess sobbing far too loudly to hear me. “If I agree to tell you what’s going on, do you agree to keep the information to yourself? You won’t tell another soul?”

“As long as I feel that keeping this a secret will benefit you and Parrish more than telling it would be,” Maxx whispers back, leaning in close to me. Our faces are within inches of one another. If I turned sharply to the left, I’d …

Fuck.

Gross.

I retreat back a step and turn, gesturing for Maxx to follow me up the stairs.

I invite him into my room and lock the door. As soon as I do that, I realize how awkward it really is having him here. Sort of like when Chasm’s in here.

Actions and not thoughts. Actions.

If the universe knows anything to be true, it’s that I love Maxine more than life. Even if X is attractive and perceptive and fiercely protective of those he loves, even if he has a good sense of humor and says really wise things at the base of waterfalls, I am not interested in him. Because, even if he and Maxine don’t end up together, she had him first.

He will be forever forbidden, forever off-limits, and I’m okay with that.

I am.

“Sit.” I point at the chair beside my desk, the one that I got for twenty bucks at a yard sale and helped my grandmother refinish. X raises both brows at me, but he does what he’s told, pulling out the chair and sitting facing me on it, his arms crossed over the back.

I take a seat on the edge of my bed and immediately remove my wet shoes and socks, my blazer, my tie. Maxx watches me so intently that I start to feel uncomfortable, and then he glances away sharply, as if he’s just realized what he’s doing.

“Let’s start from the beginning,” I say, sighing and running my hands over my green and black hair. It’s still wet. That’s what happens when you drag ass-length hair through a rainstorm. More than once. Oh well. In the scheme of things, it isn’t important in the least.

I start with the dream that wasn’t a dream, then the mysterious bloodstain on my bed, the ATV accident. Maxx listens patiently, waiting for me to get to the relevant portions of this story, with the video call, the demands, the fact that … that …

“So, I guess you heard the part about him being my father,” I start, closing my eyes and wishing I could melt into the floor. I open them again, watching as Maxx exhales and sits up straight, bringing his folded arms in against his hard chest. “The really fucked-up part of this all is that he’s not only my bio dad, but …” I sigh, lift my chin, and then make myself say it, accept it, understand that this is real and that it isn’t going away. “He’s also the Seattle fucking Slayer.”