Natalia looked like a pleasant young woman. She was the sort with which Jan would always be amenable to beginning a conversation. But no one in this cargo hull was who they used to be. Their trauma had forever changed them. They always had their guards up, and they were suspicious of anyone who approached them. They were most frightened by life’s uncertainty. Life is exhausting when you never know where you will be the next day or whether you will even be alive. What country would you be in? Who would be trying to kill you? And why? Why had the world turned upside down? Why had your family been murdered? Why were you heading to a part of the world you knew nothing about with people you don’t know? The uncertainty was draining and left everyone a bit unsure. But somewhere inside, Natalia told herself that it was okay for a young woman to enjoy the attention of a pleasant young man. And she appreciated very much that this particular young man understood what she had been through.
“That is a beautiful shin you are holding. May I see it?” inquired Jan.
Natalia was not prepared to let Jan hold it. Still, she opened her hand so that he could examine it with his eyes. She was also not prepared to discuss why she had it or where it came from, and she hoped that Jan wouldn’t ask. Fortunately, Jan was particularly perceptive, and just as he did not want anyone asking him about his background, he was not about to pry into someone else’s. Instead, he focused on the one subject each of them had a vested interest in—Palestine.
“What have you learned about Palestine?” he asked, hoping that this was a safe enough topic to broach with her.
“Not a lot. Well, apart from the stories my father used to tell me. He was a big believer in Zionism. The Jews need their own land, he always said that.”
“Someday we will. Someday these things won’t happen to Jews anymore.” Jan smiled.
Natalia started to feel like her old self again, and mentally she was returning to the Shabbat dinner table with her family. “My father used to come home Friday night after prayers and tell us stories and lessons he heard from the rabbi. He believed so deeply that someday the messiah would come and bring all of the Jews back home. He would get so excited talking about how we would rebuild the land and gather the Jews from all over the world. And once again the Jewish people would be respected.”
Natalia went on for a bit more telling stories about helping to rebuild a new country on the canvas of the old country. She spoke with passion and with biblical illustrations. Her voice was becoming stronger and more confident. She felt more comfortable, and she began to speak about her dream of helping to build a new Jewish home.
“I dream of my first steps in the land,” she began, “just like Abraham when he journeyed from Babylonia and arrived in Eretz Yisrael. Do you know the first thing he saw?” she asked.
“I don’t know,” answered Jan, noticing the sudden vibrancy to her complexion and cadence as she spoke.
“The first thing he saw,” she continued, “was the entirety of the land. God showed him visions in all directions, and He also showed him how the history of His people would play out in the future. I bet he even got a glimpse of us coming back to the land now to help rebuild a State for the Jewish people. Maybe he saw people like you and me coming back home after thousands of years in exile. I bet he saw us moving into a kibbutz and helping to farm the land. I dream of being a teacher to young children. I don’t think I really want to farm all day. Imagine what it will be like to see young Jewish boys and girls growing up on our land, far removed from the places we are coming from.”
Jan listened attentively, appreciating the melodic tone of her voice. She meandered from biblical visions to her own visions of a dream life in Eretz Yisrael. As she spoke, Jan appreciated more and more her gentle features, her enchanting green eyes, and her slender curves. He loved that through all of the madness, she somehow maintained the connection between mind and soul. The spark inside of her was still flickering, and Jan was becoming seduced by its flame. He cautiously hoped that the vigor that had returned to Natalia’s being was not just because of her passion for the Land of Israel, but also because she was enjoying his company.