February 2019
Ella stamped the icy snow from her boots and tugged off her hood before she entered the office building where Marianna worked as an accountant. Her whole face felt chapped and red, but Marianna had sounded so terrible in her last text that Ella braved the clinging cold to come to her office and go have lunch. At least this building was warm.
Marianna’s office was two floors up, a large, lively loft space with people sitting at open cubicles. As soon as she opened the glass door and approached the receptionist, she saw Marianna talking and laughing with a tall man in a dark suit, who was beaming at her. Then she heard someone shouting. The cubicle workers were standing, craning their necks, and then Ella froze, because there was Mark striding through the room in a puffy jacket, a wool hat pulled low over his forehead, his hands balled into fists. “Marianna!” he shouted, and grabbed her by the elbow, shoving the tall man out of his way.
“What do you think you’re doing?” the man said angrily.
“Wait,” the receptionist said, but Ella sprinted toward them.
“Do you take me for a fool?” Mark said, and Ella could hear the anger in his voice. Marianna put a hand on Mark’s shoulder, and he shoved it off.
“Leave her alone!” Ella said, but both Mark and Marianna ignored her.
“What’s this supposed to mean?” he shouted. “I come here to surprise you for lunch, and this is what I see, you canoodling with some man!”
“I think you need to leave,” the tall man said. “Now. Before I call security.”
“You know he’s my boss!” Marianna said to Mark. She made her face look as pleading as possible. “Can you lower your voice?”
“I’m so sorry, Tom,” Marianna said to the tall man. “He’s leaving now—”
“Get out of here,” Tom said quietly to Mark. “Now.”
“This is my wife. Why are you talking to her like that, smiling like you share a secret?” Mark’s mouth narrowed. “I’m her goddamned husband.”
Ella motioned toward Tom but Marianna locked eyes with her and shook her head. She lifted her hand like a stop sign.
“I told you to leave,” Tom said. “I repeat. Do I have to call security and have them escort you out? I can if you like.”
“If I like?” Mark drew himself up, glowering at Marianna, his arms folded, his mouth tight. He took a step closer to Tom, but when Tom didn’t move or step back, Mark deflated, turning to his wife.
“I’ll see you later,” he said, jabbing a finger at Marianna, his face dark; and then she began to shiver.
Mark strode to the elevators and vanished. After pausing a moment, Tom turned to Marianna, clearing his throat.
“Are you okay?” he asked. She nodded. “Are you sure?”
By now, there was a crowd of people standing, whispering to one another and watching, and Tom waved his hand. “Please, everyone, go back to work. Everything’s all settled now.”
He waited for people to slowly sit down, to settle, and then he turned back to Marianna. “This can’t keep happening.”
“What? It’s happened before?” Ella said, stunned, and Marianna turned to her.
“Please—” Marianna said quietly. “You need to go.”
“It disrupts everything in this office,” Tom continued, ignoring Ella. He put his hands on his hips and shook his head, staring at the ground. “Come to my office.”
Ella watched as they entered his office and he closed the door.
BACK ON THE street, bundled up again, Ella began to worry. She pictured Mark’s face, the veiled threat in his every movement, every gesture. And worse, she had seen the fear in Marianna. The same pain, the same whipped look she had once seen in Jude after his own father beat him. She hadn’t been able to stop the brutality and she had been too afraid to stand up to Judge Stein, but she had been a kid then, and now she was an adult with agency. She wouldn’t let this happen to Marianna if she could help it.
Maybe they’ll call the police, Ella thought, and make sure Mark can’t come back. But there was the house they shared, which Mark owned. He could make things difficult for her there. Ella wrapped her arms tightly about herself, shivering.
Later that afternoon, she texted Marianna.
Are you okay?
Yes.
No.
I don’t know. I fucked things up.
Mark went to get Carla.
I’ll have to see him when I get home.
No, you didn’t fuck anything up.
Can I do anything?
About Mark.
No. Not a good idea.
Then let me buy you dinner.
Yes.
Diosito’s. Twenty minutes.
ELLA GOT THERE first, winding through the colorful Mexican prayer flags to one of the blue vinyl corner booths in the back, where it was more private. When Marianna showed up—her faux fur coat that she called “the creature” buttoned up to her throat—her eyes were red.
“I got fired,” she said, sitting down, slouching out of her coat.
“What? How can that be? It seemed like your boss was on your side—”
“He was at first. But this keeps happening. And my work was suffering. Apparently, other people have been complaining to HR.” Marianna bowed her head. “He said Mark has come to the office when he knew I wouldn’t be there to ask my coworkers all these personal questions. People were pretty creeped out. I can’t even explain it to myself. It can’t get worse than this, can it?”
Ella scooted closer to Marianna and put an arm around her.
“Where’s Carla?” she said quietly. “Because if she’s with Mark, I’m thinking maybe we should go get her right now.”
Marianna shook her head. “He would never hurt her. Never. It’s me he wants to pummel. And she worships him. How can I deny her that?”
“Do you even still love him?” Ella asked.
Marianna stiffened. “I don’t know anymore,” she said. “He watches me. He’s jealous of everything. I don’t know what’s happened to him. He blows up for no reason.” She bit her lower lip. “He can gallivant all over Ann Arbor, talking up women at the bar—I’ve fucking seen him! But I can’t even work with a guy without him getting all fired up. I don’t know what to do anymore.”
Ella swallowed hard. “We talked about this before. You could leave him.”
Marianna looked at Ella, astonished. “Talking and wanting to do something is one thing. Actually doing it is another.”
“You can leave,” Ella said.
“With what? I lost my job, remember?”
“You’ll get a new job.”
“Sometimes I forget how young you really are,” Marianna said quietly. “What’s that like? To have all that hope.”
“Don’t you have dreams of something better?” Ella said. “It isn’t just young people who have dreams.”
“Of course I do. I have crazy dreams about living in a cottage by the ocean with Carla. Of hearing waves crashing as I curl up with her. Sometimes I imagine opening a bakery that sells only cupcakes. I think about coming home to Carla, the two of us being alone together, happy and safe. None of those dreams have Mark in them.”
“See?” Ella said encouragingly. “That doesn’t have to be a dream—”
Marianna scoffed. “Look, it’s not that easy. You’ll understand when you’ve lived as much of life as I have. Nothing works out that way.”
“I want to help you,” Ella protested. “Let me help you. Any way I can.”
As soon as she said it, she felt terrified. She didn’t know how she could help or what it might cost her. Only that she would.