Chapter 22 Holidays

The day after Ryan’s graduation, juvie started getting ready for Christmas. Everyone was involved. At breakfast, Mr. Chen approached Ryan, Connor, and Nathan. He asked if they would like to join a few kids and a couple of guards on a trip to find a tree in the forest.

A chance to get out, even for a day? Ryan thought. I’ll take it. Even if it is for Christmas.

The tree hunting day was perfect. As they walked back to juvie, Mr. Chen chatted to Ryan and the guys. “That tree you chose for the gym is great. But I’ll need some help decorating it. Would you guys like to help?”

Connor and Nathan nodded.

Ryan shook his head. “Christmas is just a lot of disappointment. Count me out.”

“I hear you,” said Mr. Chen. “But helping out might be fun. A lot of guys here have never had a real Christmas. We try our best to give them one.”

Ryan hesitated. Then he said, “All right. I’ll help.”

The huge tree looked good in the gym. Everyone helped light it and place the ornaments on the branches. Ryan didn’t tell anyone he really liked the tree. His dad had never brought one home.

***

Ryan’s job search kept him busy. He’d almost forgotten about the housing applications. He was surprised and anxious when Mr. Chen asked him to come with him to see Raj.

“I have some good news and some not-so good news,” said Raj. “The housing society has put you on a wait list. You may get a place before you’re nineteen. You can stay there until you finish school, get a job, and are settled.”

Ryan smiled. It was the best news he’d heard.

Raj’s face turned serious. “Ryan, your probation officer may not hear from social services about housing until late January. But you still need a place to stay when you get out.”

“That’s okay,” said Ryan. “I have enough money for one month’s rent. I could get a room at the YMCA or bunk with some people I know. I put in job applications for the mill and other places. I may get lucky. If I can survive the winter, then in the spring I’ll plant tree seedlings for a logging company, or fight forest fires. It’s hard work but decent money.”

“It sounds like a good plan. Your luck is changing,” said Raj.

As he left the counselling office, Ryan realized he had made his own luck. The thought made him smile.

His mood changed when he got to his classroom. He found Ms. Standish and some of the guys practising holiday songs for the Christmas show. Ryan shook his head. “Christmas,” he muttered. “I wish it was over.”

Ms. Standish was all into the holiday. With her help, some of the students had come up with skits for the show. Others had joined the choir.

Somehow, Ms. Standish talked Ryan into helping Nathan and Connor make sets. He was surprised to find how much he enjoyed painting backdrops.

On the day before Christmas, the show was held in the gym. Connor, Ryan, Nathan, and a few other guys sat in the audience with Mr. Chen and Raj. Ryan couldn’t help himself as he laughed at the skits. As he sang along with the choir, he looked over at Connor, Nathan, Mr. Chen, and Raj. They were singing “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.” Maybe, he thought, being with people you care for is what Christmas is all about.

After the show, small presents and candy were passed out, compliments of juvie. Guys who had families visited with them in the family room. Ryan and Connor went with some of the other guys to their pod.

Connor’s shoulders slouched as he sat next to Ryan. “It sucks,” he said.

“What sucks?” asked Ryan.

“Nathan’s getting a present from his family, but I don’t even know where my family is. I’ve been living with foster families for years. Can’t remember the last time I got a present from someone who gave a damn about me.”

Ryan put his hand in his pocket. He pulled something out and placed it on the table.

Connor looked down at a small carving of a bear.

“This is for you,” said Ryan. “I finished it. It turned out good, and I wanted you to have it. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Tears appeared in Connor’s eyes. He wiped them away with the back of his hand. “That’s the best present I ever had. Thanks, Ryan.”

Ryan felt choked up inside. He figured giving a gift was a double present — one you gave to a person you cared about, and one you gave yourself by making them happy.

The big Christmas dinner was lip-smacking good. Being with friends made it taste even better, Ryan thought.

That night Ryan lay on his bed mulling over Christmas. He smiled as he remembered the skits, the choir, Connor’s gift, and the turkey drumstick. Most of all he thought about the people in his life. For the first time, he had really enjoyed Christmas.

He couldn’t help thinking about Pete. What was Christmas like for him? Was he out of the hospital? Then Ryan remembered that he’d probably never see Pete again. Even if he was back on the road, he was probably mad at Ryan for not telling him about his CSO.

“Get on with your life,” he muttered to himself. “You’ve got good things ahead.” He repeated those words for the next six days, trying to make the memories of his friend fade.

***

Ryan dressed and made his bed. He joined Connor and Nathan as they left their bedrooms. Ryan looked at the calendar stuck to the pod’s wall. December 31. The next day he’d be free of juvie.

“Boy, I can’t wait to get out of here,” Ryan said.

“You’re one lucky dude,” said Connor as they ate their breakfasts. Connor sounded happy, but Ryan thought his face had a hangdog look.

“Don’t worry,” said Ryan. “Nathan is here. And when I can, I’ll come and see you.”

“You will?”

“If I can’t see you, I’ll write.”

“Wow. I’ve never gotten a letter from anyone.”

“Well, mine will be the first. When I get a job, I can pay for a phone. Maybe you can earn some money when you get out and buy one too. I can message you. Just don’t steal a cell, okay? You don’t need to be back in here.”

“What are you going to do, Ryan?” asked Nathan.

Ryan explained his plan, then added. “I’ve booked a room at the YMCA. I’ll work for a year, then go to school. No sweat.” He made himself sound confident. But he was worried. He wished there was someone there for him if the going got tough.

“Yeah,” said Connor. “No sweat.”