20.

As it was, we made it back to the others in good time. There was no chat on the way. Silent endurance felt both right and odd at the same time. When we’d reunited with Amelia and Xander things were a little more normal, though somehow there was no way I could tell them about what had happened to Caleb. Not out of solidarity, and not because I was in his thrall. It was more that his inability to take the joke meant that telling it would be cruel. However, the strange thing was that not taking the mick out of him, far from making him grateful, seemed to do the opposite. He bristled, ignored me, gave the others short shrift. The more nobody commented, the more het up he became. Mid-afternoon, when Xander, Amelia and I were on our camp beds playing cards, I heard a whacking, chopping sound outside and went to investigate. Caleb had cut a bough from a nearby tree with his machete and was hacking at the wood as if it was his mortal enemy. A relative of the tree used to spring the snare perhaps? I was about to leave him to it when Innocent also poked his head out of his tent to see what was going on.

‘Are you OK, Mr Caleb?’ he asked.

‘Why wouldn’t I be?’ Caleb took another swing at the branch and a yellow bite mark appeared in it.

‘Sharp knife,’ said Innocent. ‘Take care.’

‘I know what I’m doing,’ said Caleb, sending another chipping into the air.

Innocent smiled at him and was retreating, his arm affectionately around Patience’s shoulders, when Caleb abruptly stopped chopping and said, ‘Hang on a minute.’

‘Yes.’

‘What’s with all this sitting around? When do we set off?’

‘We rest here today and head home tomorrow.’ Innocent’s gentle voice made this sound more like a suggestion than a statement.

Caleb rounded on it immediately, ‘I didn’t mean when do we go home, I meant when do we see the gorillas?’

‘The gorillas,’ said Innocent.

‘Yeah.’

‘After the scare of yesterday and last night’s difficulty, I think we take everyone back to Kinshasa, for safety. It’s best,’ he said quietly.

‘No chance!’ There was an edge to Caleb’s laughter. ‘I didn’t come all this way not to see gorillas, Innocent. Creep back home? You’re going to have to do better than that.’

Hearing the commotion, Xander and Amelia joined us.

‘Another time maybe,’ said Innocent. Smiling at Patience he went on, ‘Everyone tired, I think.’

Xander nodded but Amelia, failing to read the situation, said, ‘Actually I slept very well, thank you.’

‘Good girl,’ said Caleb. ‘I knew you’d be up for it.’

If I’d ever called Amelia a ‘good girl’, she’d have ripped my arm off and beaten me to death with the bloody end of it, but unbelievably she let this go with, ‘All I meant was that I’m not sleepy.’

‘And you want to see the gorillas, yes?’ Caleb asked.

‘Gorillas, yes. But not guerrillas. Primates not poachers.’

‘Of course,’ said Caleb. ‘But we pinpointed yesterday’s poachers for the rangers –’ he made it sound like he’d done it himself – ‘so they’ll be out of the equation, and anyway the mountain gorillas are in a completely different part of the national park. The chances of coming across two sets of poachers in one trip has to be infinitesimal.’

‘That’s not actually the way statistics work in this context,’ Amelia couldn’t help explaining. That was more like it! But annoyingly she went on, ‘It doesn’t matter though. I’d still like to see them.’

A scraggy-necked chicken, which had been pecking at the dirt a few metres off, now wandered in among us. Caleb addressed Innocent: ‘We signed up for chimpanzees and mountain gorillas. You’re not going to let a minor scare like yesterday derail things, are you?’

While Innocent searched for a way to answer him Caleb waved at the chicken with the flat of his machete blade. Dust rose from the bird’s wings as it flapped-skittered away.

‘We could always come back,’ said Xander, more to help Innocent out than because he believed it. Hearing the hollowness in his own words he dug deeper. ‘You know, later in the trip. We’ve got another three weeks.’

‘You might have,’ said Caleb. ‘But not all of us are on holiday.’ He drew himself tall. ‘I have work to do, starting next week.’

Amelia couldn’t help correcting them both. ‘Work experience,’ she said to Caleb. ‘Though it’s still work of course.’ Turning to Xander she added, ‘Logistics-and-costs-wise, travelling all the way to Kinshasa and back makes zero sense. It’s not as if there’ll be fewer poachers to run into a fortnight from now.’

It occurred to me that Amelia really did want to see the mountain gorillas. She’d researched everything about the trip in advance, chimpanzees included, but from what she’d already told me about the gorillas, I reckon she could write a book on them. And yet she hadn’t spent the night without shelter in the jungle. That burning, tumbled sensation I get in my stomach when I’m exhausted was still there: the idea of heading back into the jungle feeling the way I was made me feel sick. Sensing my misgivings, Caleb upped the ante. ‘Of course, I’m not suggesting we head out to look for them today. But first thing tomorrow, when everyone’s had a decent night’s sleep, you’ll all be up for it then, yes?’

What was it with him? Why did I have to rise to it. I’ve no idea. I just know that my shoulders shrugged of their own accord and my voice, though it sounded distant in my ears, was clear enough.

‘Why not?’ I said.