Chapter 60

“I can’t believe you’re doing this,” said Laurie. “I thought everything was fine. After… you know, at the hotel, I thought that was it, you’d made up your mind.”

“I had. Only not in the way you thought. God, this is difficult.” Nadia rubbed her temples and wished she had some kind of script to follow. “I’m sorry, but it’s never going to work. We can’t go back to how we were. Everything’s changed.”

It had taken a while, but she’d finally made up her mind. Everything had changed, including her feelings for Laurie. Maybe it had something to do with his devil-may-care attitude toward work—formulating any kind of career plan was seemingly beyond him. Then Jay had given her a cutting from the paper. A local radio station was on the lookout for a gardening expert to fill a weekly question-and-answer slot. Jay had said, “You should apply, you’d be great at that.” Encouraged, she had told Laurie, who had laughed and said, “Watch out, Howard Stern, Nadia’s after your job,” and had then gone on to poke fun at the tiny radio station, telling her she shouldn’t waste her time.

Little things, but they added up.

The sun was setting, turning the sky Day-Glo pink on the horizon. As they walked over the Downs, hot-air balloons practicing for the upcoming festival rose from Ashton Court and drifted across the Avon Gorge. Laurie paused to watch a ninety-foot Rupert Bear float over their heads.

“Did you sleep with him?”

“Who?” Nadia was glad of the sun in her eyes. She blinked, hard.

Laurie tut-tutted. “Ewan McGregor. You know who I mean.”

“Oh. No, I didn’t.”

“See? Big mistake. You should have done.”

“Maybe, but I slept with you instead.”

Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, Laurie smiled slightly. “And you’re telling me I was a disappointment?”

Nadia shook her head. “You said I should sleep with Jay to get him out of my system. But I couldn’t do that. It wouldn’t have seemed… right.”

“So you slept with me instead, and got me out of your system.”

“It was your idea.”

Drily, Laurie said, “Well, remind me never to have that idea again.”

“I’m sorry.” Nadia hadn’t expected to cry. It was pathetic really; how could she get upset about finishing with someone she wasn’t even properly involved with?

“Me too. I’m gutted. Still”—Laurie smiled briefly—“I suppose it serves me right for finishing with you in the first place.”

“Maybe.” Wiping her eyes, Nadia managed a feeble smile of her own.

“If I hadn’t, we could have been married by now.”

“Probably.”

“So it’s all my fault.”

“Oh, definitely.”

“Bugger.” Laurie sighed. “And you bring me here to tell me.” Spreading his arms, he indicated the Downs. “At least I had the decency to take you to Markwick’s.”

“What will you do?” said Nadia.

“Get over it, I suppose. In about fifty years.” He gave her a tragic look. “Oh, don’t worry about me, I’m tough. By the time I’m seventy-six I’ll be absolutely fine.”

If he was able to joke about it, Nadia thought with relief, things were probably going to be all right. They could revert to being friends—which, seeing as her grandmother was about to marry his father, was just as well.

“There’s an ice-cream van over there.” As she linked her arm companionably through his, a huge detached house floated across the gorge toward them. “Come on, I’ll treat you to a Magnum.”

“Sure you don’t have to rush off? Isn’t Jay waiting for you?”

“Why would he be?”

Laurie raised his eyebrows. “You mean, he doesn’t even know he’s won?”

Something that felt horribly like panic began to spread through Nadia’s intestines. Would Jay react as she had once reacted upon learning that she’d won a pair of lime-green crocheted hot pants in the school raffle?

Aloud she said, “He might not even want to win.”

Laurie started to laugh. “Now that’s what I call risky. Talk about taking a gamble.”

“You gambled,” Nadia couldn’t resist pointing out.

Laurie’s eyes glittered with rueful amusement. “I lost.”

***

Andy Chapman from the estate agents had been showing another potential buyer around Clarence Gardens. Even if Jay hadn’t let her know this on the phone, Nadia would have been able to tell by the amount of Armani aftershave still lingering as she let herself into the house.

Jay had called to ask her to come and water the garden.

“I’m stuck here at home,” he’d gone on to explain, sounding harassed. “Look, can you do me a favor? Andy’s left some stuff in an envelope for me in the kitchen and I need it pretty urgently. If you could drop it round, I’d be grateful.”

Nadia had spent forty minutes with the hose, watering the parched plants and tidying up the edges of the lawn with her strimmer. Now that she was finished, it was time to pick up the stuff-in-an-envelope, to take over to Jay’s house.

And here it was, left on the worktop next to the sink, a white A4 envelope containing… well, whatever it contained.

What was the difference between nosiness and idle curiosity? Well, steaming open a sealed envelope would definitely count as nosiness.

Happily, this one wasn’t sealed.

As the contents slithered out onto the worktop, Nadia felt the little hairs on the back of her neck stand up in alarm.

Property details. Well, hardly that surprising, seeing that they’d been left here by Andy Chapman. But why on earth would Jay be interested in details of houses in and around Manchester?

Not the in-need-of-renovation kind, either. Quite the opposite. These were big, glamorous, over half a million-pound properties, four- or five-bedroomed and period rather than modern—in fact, not unlike the house Jay currently owned here in Bristol.

OK, no need to jump to conclusions. Just because he’d asked Andy for these details didn’t mean they were actually for him. Anyway, why would Jay want to move to Manchester?

Giving herself a mental cheek-slap, Nadia shoveled the details back into the envelope. She was being ridiculous; Jay had just bought Highcliffe House, for heaven’s sake. That meant months of work. And he was employing her to redesign the garden. He couldn’t possibly be leaving Bristol.

Oh God, could he?

It was only a short journey to Canynge Road. As she passed Bristol Zoo with its crowds of summer visitors queuing outside, Nadia couldn’t shake off that on-your-way-to-the-dentist sensation. Turning left onto Jay’s street, she realized her toes were scrunched up inside her trainers.

And with good reason. Maybe, telepathically, her toes had known all along.

After a hopelessly girlie bit of parking, Nadia switched off the ignition and wiped her clammy palms on her black jeans. Despite the heat of the day, goose bumps had pinged out all over her arms. She gazed at the For Sale sign outside Jay’s house. So it was true, it was really going to happen.

Feeling sick as she climbed out of the car, Nadia clutched the envelope to her chest. It wasn’t until she was ringing the doorbell that she realized she’d forgotten to check her face in the mirror. Earlier she had planned to joosh up her hair, take the shine off her nose, and stick on a bit of lip gloss. Instead, she probably looked awful. Oh well, too late now.

Bloody Jay, she could hit him.

Where was he anyway? Why wasn’t he answering the door?

When he did, Nadia discovered why it had taken him so long.

“Sorry, sorry… the sticky things kept sticking to the wrong bits… and then I realized I’d put it on back to front… come in, God, this is harder work than I thought.” Looking harassed but pleased to see her, Jay ushered her into the hall. Clearly he hadn’t had time to brush his hair or dash on a bit of lip gloss either. The baby, naked apart from a disposable nappy dangling from one foot, was whimpering and flailing its legs against Jay’s chest. There was an ominous damp patch on the front of his denim shirt. Evidently disgusted at finding himself in the hands of such a rank amateur, Daniel gave a kick that sent the clean nappy sailing through the air.

“Mary Poppins, I presume.” Despite everything, Nadia was unable to keep a straight face. In all the time she’d known him, Jay had always been in control of every situation. Nothing fazed him.

Except, it now became apparent, the intricacies of getting a small baby into a disposable nappy.

“Just leave it,” Jay sighed as she bent to retrieve the mini-Pampers. “Bloody thing’s stuck together all wrong anyway. And mind your feet,” he added as they made their way through to the living room. “The full one burst as I was taking it off. All these weird gel-beads exploded all over the carpet.”

“Let me take him.” Nadia held out her arms for the baby and Jay handed him over with undisguised relief.

“Watch out, he’s like the Trevi fountain. Nearly got me in the eye when he was on the changing mat. I had no idea babies peed every couple of minutes.”

“I’d count yourself lucky. Babies don’t only pee.” Years of baby-sitting during college had given Nadia the advantage; lowering Daniel onto the plastic mat—white and decorated with blue elephants—she deftly fastened the wriggling baby into a fresh nappy. Rummaging in the carry-all on the floor next to the mat, she found a clean onesie and expertly fitted him into it. Each of the snaps between his legs made a satisfying clicking sound as she fastened them. The baby looked almost disappointed, as though she’d come along and spoiled all his fun. Gazing around in search of inspiration, he opened his mouth to start bawling. Locating the bottle of water on the coffee table, Nadia scooped him up and popped it into his mouth before he could get into full swing.

“Has this been boiled?”

“Of course it’s been boiled, I’m not completely hopeless.” The moment the words were out, Jay ruefully shook his head. “OK, maybe I am. Belinda’s over at the house, packing up. She’s leaving Bristol. I offered to look after Dan for a few hours.” He looked helpless. “I thought he might sleep.”

“Babies only do that when you don’t want them to. It’s their way of keeping you on your toes. Where’s Belinda going to live?”

“Dorset. She’s renting a place for now, just down the road from her parents.”

Bugger. Why couldn’t he have said Manchester?