It’s almost eleven by the time I make it to the office. I pass through the rotating lobby doors and my heart stops. Because standing in front of the security desk is Kyle. He’s red-faced, his phone pressed to his ear as he has a heated conversation with the front desk worker.
It’s impossible to know what happened between Caitlin and him last night, but his presence here cools my blood. I should call the police. No, I can’t report him for just standing in the lobby and being generally horrible.
If he’s here, that must mean Caitlin’s here too. She’s probably upstairs. I should warn her.
But I can’t walk past him without him seeing me. And that makes my knees wobble. I take a few steps onto the freshly glossed tile before I feel his gaze land on me. I don’t pause to acknowledge him, just take off running to the elevator. As soon as I’m inside, I repeatedly press the door shut button. Kyle appears right in front of me at the threshold as the doors start closing. His stare bores into my pores. “You’re still crazy,” he spits, voice low so only I can hear. “You shouldn’t have messed with Caitlin.” The door closes.
His words bounce in the elevator, hitting me again and again until they eventually rest inside me. As soon as I’m up on my floor, I rip toward the pods, rapidly scanning the area. Caitlin’s not at her desk. Adrenaline pumps through me with every beat of my pulse. I charge toward Garret. “Where’s Caitlin?” I demand.
His stare flickers across my face, and he leans back like I’m a wild animal. “She had to step out . . . But what are you doing?”
And maybe I really have gone feral, because I ignore Garret and zero in on Rhonda next. She’s picking at something in her hair. My ribs tighten.
It’s like I’m not in my body as I make my way closer. I step toward the edge of her cubicle. Her chair squeaks as she turns toward me. “Hello, dear! Caitlin said you guys were here until almost midnight.”
“Have you seen her?” My voice is hoarse and foreign on my lips.
Rhonda’s eyebrows knit together. “I’m sure she’ll be back soon. In the meantime, could you help me with this document? I’m trying to change the color . . .”
But Armin pulls my arm from behind and says, “Can you come here a sec?” Something in his expression catches me enough to follow him to the quiet corner near the watercooler. His jaw ticks. “We need to tell our moms the truth. Today. My mom just texted me. They’re on hold with the Palliser to book it as a wedding venue. Do you know how expensive that’s going to be?”
Shit. “Okay, we’ll do it. Just give me a few—”
“No, Jolene,” Armin cuts in urgently. “We have to do it now. I can’t hold them off anymore.”
I nod aggressively and practically yell, “Yes—okay, okay, we’ll just—”
Anna, the office manager, appears out of nowhere and pushes past him. Her expression is blank beneath her blunt bangs. “Miss Smith, you need to come to the boardroom right away. We need to have a meeting with HR.”
Oh man, my final HR report is due from Cliff today. “I’ll go as soon as I can. I just need to talk to Caitlin.”
Anna shakes her head. “I really meant now.”
Suddenly I realize that Randal the security guard is standing behind her. I should’ve known something big was happening for Anna to come to our floor. Randal’s eyes droop like he hates what he’s about to do. “Jolene, can you come with us, please?”
My nails squeeze against the flesh of my palms, and I’m afraid I’m about to snap from everything. “Yes. But I have to let someone know something. It’s a matter of safe—”
“Now.”
The whole room freezes. I’m a scene. Everyone in the office is peeking up from their cubicles at me like little gophers from their holes. How had I not noticed them?
I follow Randal toward the boardroom, a cloak of tension surrounding us. Nobody bothers to even whisper to each other as I pass them by.
Entering the boardroom is like delving into a stiff and dry cave. Gregory sits at the end of the table, clearing his throat. Cliff is beside him, focusing on his notepad, not a doodle in sight. A rock forms in the middle of my stomach, because in the very last seat is Caitlin.
“Are you okay?” I ask her. “Kyle’s in the lobby.” My words come out in a croak.
Caitlin stares through me, arms not crossed so much as curled around herself. My stomach twists. Whatever happened between us last night, the switch has been flicked.
I stumble toward the chair Armin tested yesterday, eyes focused on the floor.
Cliff speaks first. “We’ve had some concerning information brought to our attention that we’re hoping to clear up.” His voice is firm, but he sounds a million miles away. And when I draw my gaze to him, he won’t look directly at me, staring instead at my forehead.
Gregory’s lips tease a smile. He quickly covers his mouth by pretending to rub his mustache, but not that quickly.
Cliff continues: “Caitlin reported that last night you interfered with a private correspondence between her and her partner, and that you tried to convince her to leave her partner?”
Caitlin perches in her chair, her gaze soft and distant, staring through me like a porcelain doll. Her hands rest neatly on the table, but her lips quaver, and she’s so far gone from the person I spoke to yesterday.
A wave of fear flashes. Kyle is still in the lobby. I address her directly. “Are you safe? Is he forcing you here?” My voice is shaky, my throat tight.
Instantly her eyes gain focus, her chin rises. She turns to the others and says, “This is what I’m talking about.”
Cliff winces and his jaw tightens, yet he won’t look at me—or speak up. Anna, who took the seat between Caitlin and Cliff, scribbles on her notepad, and Gregory mouth breathes from his perch in the corner.
Everything inside me starts sinking. Caitlin dabs the corners of her eyes. My thoughts speed past me, rapid and broken. I speak to Caitlin before thinking: “So you’re not leaving him?”
She curls farther into herself, like a turtle into a shell. I can’t catch up to all the stillness and silence in the room.
Her shoulders shake with a silent sob. I may not have spoken to her much over three years, but I’ve watched her almost every day. The fear in her eyes is real, but when her gaze flashes toward me, it’s the remorse that drills into my core.
Cliff adjusts the papers in front of him. “Jolene, after a conversation last night between you and Miss Joffrey regarding her fiancé, Kyle, Caitlin had reason to believe you were interfering in her—”
“I knew my draft email was messed with! You sabotaged me! We know what you’re really like.” Caitlin’s voice is stilted and pitchy. “I had to tell Gregory everything.”
My skin goes taut. I flash back to the night Cliff busted me at Caitlin’s computer. Me typing Jolene Sucks could’ve been my demise.
“Miss Joffrey! That’s enough.” Cliff still can’t look at me. His knuckles are firm fists, his lips a thin line.
This was always going to happen. I knew this was going to happen with him one day.
He continues: “Due to the concern, Gregory had authority to check your desk.”
“It’s company property,” Gregory just has to say. The joy in his heart is an ugly thing.
Of course Gregory was all too happy for any excuse to riffle through my things—extorting the guy probably didn’t help my situation. I picture Gregory pawing at my desk, going through my papers . . . My stomach turns to acid. Cliff gestures toward Gregory. “Unfortunately, there was concerning material inside.”
Gregory puffs out his chest, just thrilled with his existence.
Cliff adjusts the papers under his hands. My heart tumbles and tumbles into the ground. “You can’t do that! That’s my private stuff! That’s my life!” But as the words tumble from my mouth, I know I’m not the one to speak.
Cliff nods frustratingly, but still, he won’t look past his hands. He pushes a folder toward me. I keep my hands tucked into myself. “Several printed documents that are undeniable were recovered from your desk.”
He props open the folder. A piece of paper has been clipped to the top with a list:
The tightness in Cliff’s expression is like a betrayal.
“That’s not what it looks like.” I stare at him in a silent plea. “I was trying to help.”
“Were you?” Cliff’s jaw ticks in unison with the drop of my stomach. He breaks our stare first. “The primary concern is that there are documents printed that weren’t sent to you containing sensitive management materials.” His voice is growing increasingly airy and distant. His eyes flash to the paper he’s holding out. “And a plan detailing your deceptions.”
My list I’d written just a few weeks ago:
His fingers halt on the last line.
My simple plans bang around and crush in on me. Cliff’s expression is not one of anger but of indifference.
“That’s not . . .” I fumble with no words left. “Cliff, you know me. It was all real.”
Cliff’s stare is cold before his gaze drops from me toward his hands. It sends a stab through my chest, sudden and hard.
Caitlin pipes in. “I wasn’t sure when Kyle first told me . . .” Her shoulders square. “But Kyle was protecting me. She has a history of obsessing over people and hurting them.”
It’s like I’m falling down, but I’m stuck in my chair. I search Caitlin’s eyes. I search for the girl from last night, but it’s like there’s no light left inside here.
“My fiancé is worried because he knows what Jolene is capable of when she has an unhealthy interest in someone.” Her eyes squeeze shut. Her shakiness, her fear. Surely she sees how utterly fucked up this is? Surely she sees.
All the blood drains from my head. I’m losing control. I’m only partly aware of the words that spill from my mouth. “He’s going to hurt you! I heard how he talks to you! How he emails!”
Everything stops as the room pulls into sharp focus.
“Is it true, then?” Cliff’s eyes are wide when I come back into focus. “Miss Smith, you accessed Caitlin’s email without her consent?” We lock gazes for a second, because he knows this, but—oh my god—I’m so stupid. The realization punches me in the gut. His stare is stony and distant, and it’s like he’s looking at me for the first time. A stranger. I’m an idiot. An imbecile. I trusted him. But he trusted me.
And I hurt him. Like always.
Caitlin strengthens her stare. “She was trying to get me away from Kyle. She wanted me isolated, I think. She’s always watching me. I didn’t want to share this, but I feel I must.”
Everything I never allowed myself to think runs in my mind right here. Right now.
I was alone with Ellie that night. I made her stay at the party—did I convince her to leave the group? Was I jealous of her? Of Caitlin? I did order that Caitlin-esque blazer.
I should say something to defend myself, but when my gaze inevitably draws to Cliff, I’m done. Everything there is to say seems ridiculous now. Every single word there is. It’s like I’m tumbling down a hole.
Cliff lets out a sigh, all the stress in the world stored in the wrinkles in his forehead. He wearily nods toward Caitlin. “The rest of this meeting will be just with management and Miss Smith. Caitlin, please feel free to take the day for personal time as our office handles this matter.”
Caitlin and I exchange one final look. There’s so much floating between us. So many times we’ve exchanged venom with just our eyes.
She breaks the stare first. I swallow audibly.
This is how it all ends for us. It’s too much and not enough.
Once she clears out of the room, her cinnamon scent lingering in her final wake, Gregory nods toward Anna and Cliff. “She’s also been reading very intimate emails of mine.” It’s my cringe that gives me away. Is extortion not even sacred to the guy?
Finally, Cliff locks eyes with me. I’m trapped by them. I need to get as far away from him as possible. I want to touch him.
Anna peers up from her notepad, adjusting herself higher in her chair. “We’re going to ask you quite formally. Have you been reading people’s emails?”
I nod once. “Yes, but I can explain it.”
That’s all it takes. They all shift in their chairs while Cliff gathers the papers and handles the final blow. “Miss Smith.” He clears his throat. “Due to your extreme misconduct and personal breaches with your colleagues, we’re going to dismiss you from your position within Supershops Incorporated, effective immediately.”
Something in me breaks with the words “personal breaches.” I have no fight left. This was always going to happen. I shouldn’t have spoken to anyone. I stare at my lap and give a small nod.
“Security and I will escort you to your workstation to clear your belongings and ensure your safe exit from the building. Please turn in your access card and ID card to me.”
I pull the lanyard from my pocket and slide it over. Our fingertips touch for a second.
I immediately pull my hand away. There’s something broken behind his gaze. He broke his promise too.
Good for him after all, I suppose.
I step out of my chair and straighten my shoulders. I won’t let my legs buckle.
Now it’s time to start the final procession of shame to my desk.