get the blown-aparte!

1) Take yourself seriously. Very, very seriously, and shave off those poetic locks.

2) Next, trim back the hair on the top of the head leaving a three-inch strip.

3) Flick this forwards in a semi-curl of arrogance towards your foes.

4) Stand on a rock in the middle of an ocean, alone, and shout: ‘I am Napoleon Bonaparte! Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair!’