JON WOKE THE next morning to find that his eye was throbbing, his leg was in a cast, and pretty much every bone in his body ached. And there was a note from Chloe on his locker.
Today is Saturday.
Jon smiled. He’d been wondering what day it was, and Chloe had clearly anticipated that.
I’ll be coming to see you this afternoon. Hannah picked some clothes up from your house yesterday and they’re in your locker. If I find you’ve not been doing as you’re told, I’ll fill out the forms to have you restrained.
Jon wondered whether Hannah had broken in when she’d gone to collect his things, and decided he didn’t care. Chloe was coming, and she could threaten him with whatever she liked. He needed to get out of bed.
He leaned over, reaching for the controller for the bed, just managing to grasp it between the tips of his fingers. Once he was sitting up he felt a little better, and a cup of tea from the breakfast trolley consolidated the improvement. If he lowered the height of the bed a little, he could reach the locker door, and he found a couple of T-shirts, a hooded top and some sweatpants stacked neatly inside.
‘Hey...’ One of the nurses, whom he knew by sight, was marching across the ward towards him. ‘What are you doing?’
‘Mobilising.’ He gave her a smile and she ignored it.
‘Ah. Not playing with the controls on the bed, then.’ She picked up the remote, and hooked it on the end of the bed, out of reach.
‘Nah. I wouldn’t dare.’ He tried the smile again, and this time the nurse grinned back. ‘But I would like to get out of bed. Have a wash and get dressed.’
‘I don’t know. You’re not supposed to...’
But he was going to. Jon knew exactly what he wanted to say to Chloe, and he couldn’t say it like this. He needed to get back on his feet, and the sooner he started, the sooner he’d get there.
‘Please.’ He flashed the nurse his most winning smile. ‘I promise I won’t overdo things.’
‘All right. Stay there, I’ll go and get a wheelchair.’
* * *
Jon couldn’t help watching the doors of the ward and as the hands of the clock closed on the number twelve he operated the controls of his bed to put him as close to a sitting position as possible. It was crazy. Chloe wouldn’t be here this early. She might not be here at all, in which case he’d go and find her, as soon as he was able. But when the first group of visitors came onto the ward she was one of them, a large bag slung over her shoulder and Amy in her arms.
‘You’re dressed. And sitting up.’ She grinned in approval.
Amy was looking at him intently, and Jon wondered whether his swollen and bruised eye was frightening her. He covered it with his hand and smiled at her, his eye throbbing with pain.
‘Hurt... Kiss it better.’ She looked enquiringly up at Chloe.
‘Yes, sweetie. You want to kiss it better?’
Amy nodded, and Jon held out his hands towards her. Chloe delivered her into his arms, and he hugged her tight.
‘Careful, now, sweetie.’ Chloe caught Amy’s reaching hand just before it connected with his face. ‘We have to be very gentle with him.’
Amy seemed to understand. Stretching up in his arms, she planted a kiss on his cheek, and Jon struggled to keep his composure.
‘Thank you, Amy. That feels much better now.’ He stroked the little girl’s light auburn curls and she snuggled into his arms.
‘Would you like to give Jon his get-well parcel?’ Chloe sat down on the moulded plastic chair next to his bed and opened her bag.
The parcel was wrapped in sparkly blue and gold paper, which was obviously designed to appeal to Amy. The little girl sat on the bed next to him and Chloe placed the parcel into her lap. She slid one finger under the wrappings, and slowly started to tear them.
Chloe grinned. ‘No, Amy, it’s for Jon. Give it to him.’
Amy pretended not to hear and Jon leaned over. ‘You’re going to unwrap it for me, aren’t you?’
He helped her with the sticky tape, holding her tight so she didn’t slip off the bed, and hoping that none of the nurses saw them and came to tell him that a child really shouldn’t be sitting on his bed. Chloe seemed to have the same thought and turned, pulling the curtains a little so that they weren’t immediately visible from the door.
Inside the parcel was a book and a packet of chocolate buttons. Amy left the book for him and picked up the chocolate.
‘Hey, that’s lovely, Amy. Thank you.’ He picked up the book and Amy handed him the chocolate buttons, clearly wanting him to open them and give them straight back. He shot Chloe an enquiring glance, wondering if it was all right for Amy to have the chocolate.
‘Just a few.’ She pressed her lips together in wry humour. ‘The chocolate’s from me. Amy chose the book.’
He laughed, ignoring the painful protest from his eye. ‘She likes whodunnits, does she? Thank you, Chloe.’
Thank you for the book and the chocolate, and for wrapping them up. For bringing Amy. For yesterday, and for being here today. Thank you for being so beautiful.
‘You’re welcome.’
He was sure now. Chloe and he weren’t perfect for each other, they were different in so many ways. But while perfect was nice, wanting was everything. And Jon knew beyond any shadow of a doubt that everything he wanted was here now. He would get out of here, get himself back together and win her back.
* * *
She came again on Sunday, this time alone. Amy and Hannah had gone to James’s for lunch, and it was clear that Chloe had missed the family gathering to come and see him.
‘So they’re letting you out today?’
‘Looks like it. I’m waiting for the duty doctor to sign me off, and then me and my crutches are free to go.’ He indicated the pair of crutches that were propped up behind his chair.
‘So—how long?’
Jon grinned. ‘Who knows? I offered to sign myself off, but the nurses didn’t think much of that suggestion.’
‘No. Don’t suppose they did. Well, I’ll wait and take you home.’
‘I can get a taxi.’ He didn’t want to push things just yet.
‘Don’t you dare.’ She got to her feet. ‘I’m going to go and ask where the doctor is. Has the pharmacy sent up your drugs yet?’
‘Not yet.’
‘Then I’ll see what I can do to chase them up, too.’
Chloe’s enquiries seemed to bear more fruit than his, possibly because she was able to follow people and buttonhole them, rather than having to wait for them to come to her. It took another hour, but by two o’clock he was being wheeled to the hospital entrance by a porter, his possessions packed into a plastic bag. He waited on a bench beside the automatic doors, which delivered a blast of cold air every time someone walked through them, and when he saw Chloe’s car draw up outside he got carefully to his feet.
She got him into the car and was on the main road, driving away from the hospital, before she dropped the bombshell. ‘You’re coming home with me for a decent meal. And you can stay the night. Hannah and Amy are staying over at James’s tonight, so you can take their room.’
In her house. Surrounded by her scent. That wasn’t a good idea. He needed to be stronger before he could even think about putting his plan into operation.
‘Thanks, but...I’m okay. I’d really like to go home.’
‘So you can lie in bed and look at the hole in the ceiling? Hannah told me that your bedroom’s a right mess.’
‘I’ve got a sofa-bed downstairs, I’ll sleep there.’ He grinned at her. ‘Save me going up and down the stairs for a few days.’
‘You can’t camp out in your own house, Jon. It’s much more comfortable at my place...’
* * *
The discussion rumbled on for the duration of the drive to her house. But Chloe had the last word because she was the one driving, and Jon couldn’t do anything about where she chose to take him. It was an unfair advantage but Chloe would take whatever she could get.
She helped him out of the car and he carefully negotiated the front path and the step over the threshold and into the house. It seemed that he’d at least reconciled himself to a meal, if not a bed for the night, but she could work on that.
Leading him into the sitting room, she fetched a footstool and a cushion so he could prop his leg up.
‘Would you like some tea? Or coffee?’ She was trembling suddenly. Being alone with him was different from the bustle of the hospital, where caring was the normal course of action and not a choice.
‘Let me—’
‘No, you’ve only just sat down. Don’t be silly.’ Chloe was feeling more and more nervous. This wouldn’t do.
His eyes softened, as if he saw her anguish, and she felt herself redden. This was no time to be thinking about the emotional, she had to think about the practical.
‘Chloe, I’ve got to be able to do things for myself. Let me try, please.’
She felt her legs begin to shake. Before she could stop it, a tear ran down her cheek. ‘No. No, you can’t, Jon. I won’t let you.’
‘Why not?’
‘Because...’ Just because. That was the best answer she could think of, but the worst one was the one that spilled out before she could stop it. ‘Because I know you’re trying to be independent and look after yourself, and that’s a good thing. But I know how much that hurts, too. I know you were afraid when you were alone up there in the loft with a broken leg because I was afraid when I was alone here, all the times I fell over and couldn’t get up.’
‘Yeah. I was afraid.’
‘So why won’t you let me look after you a bit? Just stay here for a few days, until you’re a bit stronger.’
A shadow passed across his face. She’d blown it all, but suddenly Chloe didn’t care. Doing nothing wasn’t an option, not any more.
‘It’s too soon...’
It was always going to be too soon for Jon. There was never going to be a right time. But she could bear that now. She could bear him walking away from her, but what she couldn’t live with was never having tried.
‘I don’t care. It doesn’t matter if you’re never going to want me the way I want you, and I don’t expect anything from you. I just want to be there for you.’
‘Chloe...’ He struggled to his feet. He was going to go now, she knew it. Even though she’d steeled herself to it, the idea seemed to suck all of the air from the room, and she couldn’t breathe.
All the same, she went to help him. If he wouldn’t stay here, it would be just as well if he didn’t break the other leg.
‘Chloe.’ She’d given him his crutch and he’d got his balance now, but he still didn’t let go of her shoulder. ‘I meant that I’m not well enough to try to win you back. Not yet. But I will...’
He pulled her against him, holding her tight. She could hear his heart beating. Or was it hers?
‘What do you mean, you’re not well enough? You think I want you to run up and down the stairs ten times?’
‘Just the once would be good...’ Suddenly everything had changed, and Chloe gave him a playful dig in the ribs. Jon winced, smiling.
‘Sorry... Bruises?’
‘It doesn’t matter. This isn’t how I wanted it to be, I wanted to give you flowers and be able to get down on my knees and beg...’
‘You know you don’t have to do that. I love you. More than I’m afraid of losing you.’
‘I love you too. More than I’m afraid of messing this up.’
He kissed her, puffing out an exasperated breath when he wobbled a little and she had to steady him. Then he smiled down at her and Chloe reached up, gently pulling him down for another kiss. This was exactly how it was meant to be. Not caring about who was supporting who, but just stronger together.
‘I wish I could sweep you off your feet. There are so many things...’ He kissed her brow, his mind obviously working overtime to catalogue the many things.
‘Don’t keep it to yourself. Tell me about it.’
‘The thing I most want right now?’ He smiled down at her. ‘I just want to hold you, Chloe, and feel your skin against mine. But I’m not sure I can stand up for very much longer.’
Helping him up the stairs and into her bedroom wasn’t exactly what either of them might have fantasised about, but it was perfect. Settling him on the bed, propping his leg on a pillow and stripping off his sweatshirt felt like the most romantic thing in the world, as did having to stand a little to one side to let him see her pull her top off, because his left eye was pretty much closed.
‘You’ll take me like this?’ His fingers brushed the bruises on his left side. ‘They’re not very pretty.’
‘It’s just a few bruises. They make you look ruggedly pretty.’ Chloe climbed onto the bed, careful not to touch him, but he chuckled, pulling her close.
As she settled against him he let out a contented sigh. All the missing and the longing had been set free, with only love left to replace it.
When he finally spoke, she could hear the smile in his voice. ‘So how long do you reckon we’ll be able to hold out for?’
He’d been thinking the same thing she was. Her body was buzzing with warm arousal, but the urgency was slaked by the knowledge that Jon was in no condition for anything other than rest right now. And they had a future. They didn’t need to rush things.
‘I can hold out for a very long time, Jon.’
‘Really?’
‘Yes, really. You’re recovering from a nasty injury, and you need to rest.’ She said the words with as much determination as she could muster. ‘We’re going to have to take things slowly and gently. A little improvisation maybe...’
He chuckled. ‘I’m looking forward to seeing what improvisations you’ll come up with.’
She looked up into his face, feeling the love that she saw there reverberate in her heart. ‘Are you going to behave or am I going to have to be strict with you?’
Jon pulled her down for a kiss. ‘You’re going to have to be very strict, my love.’