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“I’m telling you; Ed Walker is alive today because he was able to grow a new kidney.”
The argument the two men were having was becoming a little too loud at the other end of the bar. The disagreement was over stem cell research, a subject Tim Hall knew little about but was very interested in.
“Randy, I agree that one day science will do wonders with stem cells, but right now it’s all experimental.”
“Experimental!” Randy shot back; his voice raised two octaves. “They are curing cancer right now, today even, and I’ll tell you something else—”
“You two shut the fuck up or you’re both out of here!” ordered Mary Ann, the bartender and owner of the Blue Goose Bar and Grill, where Tim had spent most of his time since his retirement.
Mary Ann Layback was a 40-year-old ex-biker chick (her own description) who wore black t-shirts and tight jeans with a motorcycle chain belt. She had long brown hair with a reddish tint, which she pulled back in a ponytail most of the time. Although Tim found Mary Ann attractive, he’d never dated anyone like her before and thought she was also a little scary. Tim wondered if he was even capable of handling a woman like Mary Ann. Recently, he had been having a hard time “getting it up” when watching internet porn, and he was becoming concerned. The thought of the humiliation of not getting hard for Mary Ann was simply unthinkable.
“I’m out of here, anyhow,” remarked the man who Tim had met but couldn’t remember the name of, which was something he noticed was happening more and more lately.
As the man paid his tab and got up to leave, he said to Mary Ann, “Buy Ben Casey here another drink on me.” He was laughing as he walked out.
“Who the fuck is Ben Casey?” asked Mary Ann as she made Randy another rum and coke.
“He was a doctor on a show of the same name back in the ‘60s, played by an actor named Vince Edwards,” answered Tim, not looking up from his iPhone.
“Wow, Tim, you are just a fountain of useless knowledge,” Mary Ann laughed as she opened a bottle of Budweiser and placed it next to the one Tim had not finished.
This indicated that the beer was on the house. Mary Ann was always giving Tim free drinks, and Tim felt that she had a different and perhaps closer relationship with him than with the other regulars who frequented the Goose, as the bar was known. Perhaps they were kindred spirits, although at other times Mary Ann could be as cold to Tim as she was to the other regulars.
“You’re not that fucking smart, college guy,” Mary Ann had said to him once in front of the others, and everyone had laughed, which made Tim feel lower than whale shit. But for the most part, he felt that Mary Ann liked him more than the other regulars at the bar.
Snapping out of his reverie about Mary Ann, Tim noticed that Randy had slid down the bar to the seat next to him. “So, how goes it, Secret Agent Man?” he asked.
That was a nickname Tim had picked up from the other barflies at the Goose based on his general knowledge of a number of subjects in a number of areas and his claim that he was once an agent for the CIA. Tim was one of the few regulars who had finished college. As a matter of fact, Tim had a Ph.D. in Chemistry, but no one knew it. Actually, Tim himself did not feel that he was particularly bright—he felt that most of the regulars at the Goose were just slow. But they were his friends, and Tim was happy he had some now.
“Well, Randy, I am looking into getting some dental implants because my dentist says I’m going to lose a lot of my teeth from some kind of gum disease.” Tim always found it best to keep things simple with his friends at the Goose.
“Dental implants? Those things are going to cost you an arm and a leg!” Randy exclaimed.
Randy was correct. The initial estimate from Tim’s dentist had been over thirty thousand dollars.
“For that kind of money, Tim, you could get an entire new body with stem cells!” Randy was becoming more animated. “Even new teeth—but the trouble with the teeth grown with stem cells is that they don’t know how to make them stop growing.” He laughed loudly. “You’d look like some kind of monster, Tim.”
Mary Ann slammed an empty beer bottle on the bar to get Randy’s attention. “What did I say about keeping it down, Randy?”
“Yeah, yeah, I know,” Randy mumbled, making a retreat out the front door. Tim watched Randy disappear around the corner.
“I think you scared off my friend, Mary Ann.”
“I’m the only bar left that will serve your friend, so he’d better be fucking afraid.”
Mary Ann bent over to change beer kegs, and Tim took the opportunity to look at her butt. He really did want to ask Mary Ann out on a date, but he just felt that he was now too old for her. Tim was finding that he hated getting old. Besides his lingering injuries from the accident, Tim could feel age creeping up on him. His eyesight was going, his hair was thinning, and he tired more easily. Getting old just sucked. Tim picked up his iPhone and Googled stem cells.
Tim brand new fear was Dementia or early onset Dementia. His mother had died from it after all so Tim felt that he was a very strong candidate for the disease. He wondered if embryonic stem cells could regenerate dead brain cells. He thought back to his studies in chemistry at UC Berkley and such a thing did seem theoretically possible, but he studied chemistry over thirty years ago and a lot had changed.
Ironically Tim was recruited by the CIA because of his PHD in Chemistry yet they never really used him for it. Instead they teamed him up with a woman named Rebecca Scott and sent them to the jungles of Central America to train the Contras on military tactics which they had only recently learned themselves. Typical CIA Tim thought and wondered what Rebecca was now doing. Was she working at Langley? These were the types of things Tim could not remember yet he remembers that he had a relationship with Rebecca while separated from Pam who was working in the Asian continent at the time. Tim had only slept with three women at that point in his life and Rebecca was number three. This made Tim wonder if women placed numbers on things such as how many different men they slept with as men did with women. Probably not or not as much Tim speculated.
Mary Ann came from around the bar and sat next to Tim, peering over Tim’s shoulder at the screen. “Stem cells, Tim? What are you planning on using stem cells for?” she asked.
Tim shrugged. “My understanding is that stem cells have been used for a variety of different purpose. And it does make sense, Mary Ann.”
“But why do you need stem cells, Tim?”
Tim sensed that Mary Ann was actually interested, not just being nice. “Has anyone ever told you about my memory issues?” he asked.
“You mean that big dark secret that you carry around, Tim? The one where you have gaps in your memory? You know back when you were a spy?” Mary Ann was now laughing at him.
Most of the regulars at the Goose knew about Tim’s amnesia issues and it had also got around that he was an agent for the CIA which no one, including Mary Ann believed. Sometimes, the regulars would ask Tim something about the year 2014 just to watch Tim struggle to remember. Unbeknownst to Tim, though, Mary Ann had been looking out for him to keep that from happening for a while.
“Yeah, well, I suffered a memory loss,” Tim explained. “It’s actually a kind of amnesia, where I have these very annoying gaps in my memory between the years 2012 and 2015. I was wondering if stem cell therapy might help. It won’t hurt to look.”
Tim suddenly noticed that he and Mary Ann were alone, and he saw that she was staring directly at him but what she did next was a total surprise.
Tim was drinking his beer using his left hand and held the iPhone in his right hand. Mary Ann grabbed Tim right wrist and twisted it hard into Tim’s back, but Tim made a counter move and shoved his left elbow towards her solar plexus but missed it. Tim’s move however broke Mary Ann’s hold on his right wrist. Tim turned to face Mary Ann with both of his arms now turned in to a 90-degree angles from his elbows. Mary Ann however was now in a boxing stance and threw a right hook aimed at Tim’s jaw, but Tim was able to block her punch with his left arm. She followed with a left hook that Tim blocked with his right arm. This continued for another 45 seconds as Mary Ann continued to throw punches and Tim was successfully blocking them, but he could also tell that she was slowing down on purpose which was a good thing because Tim was now breathing hard. All of a sudden it occurred to Tim that this was not a fight but a test. Mary Ann wanted to see what basic fighting skills Tim processed. If she had be able to twist Tim’s arm and have him in pain with his face on the bar top, then she would have known that he was a fake. Mary Ann allowed Tim to grab both of her wrists and use his weight to push her against the wall where he kissed her.
“OK, the first kiss is free, but you are going to have to work for a second one. Okay, Tim?” she said with a grin. “So, when are you going to ask me out on a date?”
The bell attached to the door suddenly jingled indicating that somebody had come into the bar. Mary Ann quickly moved from Tim to her place behind the bar. The regular payed no attention to Tim as he ordered a boiler maker.
“And what about you Timmy? Ready for another?”
Tim shook his head indicating that yes, he did desire another round but was just beginning to finally catch his breath. He watched Mary Ann speak with her customer but wondered. Women do not naturally fight like Mary Ann just did unless they are trained to. Even bad ass biker chicks do not fight that well. No Mary Ann Layback was no biker chick but then what was she or more importantly, who was she?