17

 

Lost in thought, Shelby headed to where Harrison parked the car. Her emotions were even more scattered, but at least she’d know what was in the envelope before she left Edinburgh and could close that chapter of her life. Harrison caught up to her and opened the car door, standing aside and waiting.

Her senses on high alert, she knew he had something to say. The sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach warned her it might not be especially good or anything she wanted to hear. By the time he slipped inside the car and buckled his seatbelt, Harrison still hadn’t spoken.

She cleared her throat. “You know the saddest thing of all?” When he didn’t answer, she plowed on. “Whether or not Mama was ‘Kentucky Woman,’ I hate that Pops didn’t move on with his life, find a wife, and make a family of his own. He’s such a good man and deserving of love.” Leaning her head against the seat, she blew out a breath. “I suppose you think I’m being overly sentimental and judgmental.”

“Don’t presume to know what I think, Shelby.” Turning the key in the ignition, Harrison pulled the car away from the curb.

Seemed she wasn’t the only one on edge. She swallowed hard. “My apologies.”

“Pops made his choice a long time ago, and he’s made a life for himself here. A good life. Look, I know you think falling in love is the answer to his loneliness. I’m not saying I haven’t thought the same thing. I’ve tried to help, offered to talk with him about it. But it’s his life to live, not ours, and he has to pay the consequences for his choices.”

Inside her, the steam was building. Shelby bit her lip, staring out the window as she measured her words. Even so, she knew it’d only fuel the fire. Might as well get it out now. “What about you, Harrison?” she asked, turning to face him. “Whether or not you realize it, you’ve allowed what happened with Tiffany to scare you away from finding love, and I’d suggest you’re running away like Robert did all those years ago.” She crossed her arms, shivering in spite of the warm summer breeze coming through the open windows. “Maybe that’s why you’ve bonded. You’re kindred spirits.”

“Fine.” They were driving by a park, and Harrison steered the car to the curb and turned off the engine. “We’re going to talk this out. Right here, right now.”

When she put her hand in his a minute later as he helped her from the car, he laced his fingers with hers and led her to a large tree near the middle of the park. “I hope you don’t mind sitting on the grass,” he said. “I’ll get your sweater out of the car if you want.”

Even agitated, the man considered her needs. “That’s not necessary. Thanks.” She pulled Harrison down beside her and leaned against the tree. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”

Resting his arms on his propped knees, he stared straight ahead. “What makes you think I don’t want love in my life?”

“That was unfair. I’m sorry,” she said. “But look at your life, Harrison. From what I know, you travel the world, never staying in one place long enough to put down roots or form any kind of permanent relationship. “

“I’m sure you can see the irony of that statement in terms of our relationship. If what we’ve shared together is any indicator, it doesn’t take long to form a deep personal attachment. Tell me what permanent relationships you have in your life, Shelby. And co-workers and clients don’t count.”

“I have plenty of friends,” she said, faltering a bit, tears stinging the back of her eyes. Mainly friends from college and professional colleagues, but Harrison didn’t need to know the particulars.

“Here’s something that might shock you.” His eyes searched hers. “In the short time I’ve known you, I’ve come to care about you a great deal. Enough to believe that a future with a woman might be possible. Enough to stay in one place for the rest of my life, put down roots, get married, and start a family.”

Her eyes roamed over his face and her mouth gaped. “What are you saying?”

“I’m falling in love with you.”

“Well, don’t do that,” she said, rising to her feet. “How could we realistically have a future together? You know how much I care about you, Harrison.” Her voice broke. “You might think you love me, but I need someone with me, by my side, working through the problems of life together. Not someone who’ll be flying off across the country or the globe at any given moment. I admire what you do, but I don’t think I could handle always being second best.”

Shelby’s chest heaved with the force of her emotion. “I can’t do it. I won’t allow you to wreak havoc with my emotions, make me think...make me feel,” she sputtered, losing steam and backing up a few steps. As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she regretted them, but it was too late.

Standing up beside her, the muscles in Harrison’s jaws flexed. “You think all I want are a few kisses here in Edinburgh? Then you’ll go back to Chicago, and we’ll never see each other again? Ever? Because if that’s what you believe, then I wonder if you know me at all. Right now,” he said, taking her hand, pulling her around and backing her up against the tree, “I don’t want you to think. I want you to feel, I want you to—”

His lips descended on hers, and all she wanted was to slip into his heart and stay the rest of their natural born lives. “What we need to do is leave,” she said, pushing against his chest. “This is dangerous.”

“Why?” His breath fell warm and sweet on her cheek. “Tell me why, Shelby love. Am I dangerous, or is kissing me dangerous?”

“Both.” She squirmed and wriggled beneath his arms to walk a few feet away, needing to put distance between them. “You’re dangerous for my heart, Harrison. And don’t call me that. Because...”

He turned and leaned back against the tree. “Because why?”

“You ask far too many questions I’m not ready to answer.”

“Fine,” he said, raising his hands. “I have one more question I hope you can answer.”

Emotionally spent, she met his gaze. “Try me.”

“Can you honestly tell me I’m the one who’s scared and running away from love?”

And again, the man was right. Frighteningly so.

She lowered her gaze. “No, Harry. I can’t.”