An anatomy of injury

My head was injured one day

when another boy found it to be just a stone’s throw away

from his animosity.

My knee was injured one day,

when I fell onto the monstrosity of a splintered church organ

with a crash and a gash and a splash of crimson.

My forearm was cracked one Dunstable day

when I slipped off the slide and received a really nasty knock.

When I was knocked off my bicycle, I injured my testicle

and the policeman asked if I had received any injuries,

I said that I had not.

My heel was injured when I put my foot into the wheel

of my brother’s motor-bicycle, rather than on the footrest.

We were unable to save the sock.

My pride was injured

when the teacher asked us who we thought

had come top of the class in the tests

and many said they thought it was me,

but it wasn’t.

Then she asked who we thought

had come second

and many thought it was me,

but it wasn’t.

I had come ninth.

image

The Roman physician Galen with one
arm in plaster, ordering five pints

Dear Sis,

I do miss you. If I ever get over to your side of the world, I said to Bob, perhaps we could visit you there in French Canada. The French can be so infuriating but you’ve got to love them. I’m so in love with Joan of Arc, even though she was against the English. On a night out, me and Edie always used to head for the Free French Club. It was her who discovered it. She thought the French people there were romantic and enchanting. So, it’s funny I ended up with a Parisian painter and she got a butcher from Southend.

Mind you Bob’s not as French as he was… well he’s called Bob now, for a start. Everything’s just gradually got more English. We get one boy and we call him René Marcel, eight years later another one comes along and we call him John. There’s still the odd French word we use, though. When they pick their noses we tell them not to play with their loos. I think it sounds less common than bogies. Really I’d rather they didn’t pick their noses at all, but they’re just kids aren’t they, like we were. Let’s get our skates on and meet up, Glad.

As always,

Your sis