The smell of fresh coffee stirred Karen from a deep sleep. An odd quietness surrounded her, and she sat up with a start. It took a moment for her to remember she wasn’t in her own bed…or the city. Following that revelation came a rush of other thoughts, both frustrating and erotic. Who but Leo could evoke a combination like that?
Karen reached out to hold him, to make sure the night before hadn’t been a dream, but his side of the bed was empty. Not again…
“Leo?” She recognized the panic in her voice and forced a deep breath. This was not like last time.
It wasn’t until the buzzing in her ears stopped that she heard whistling and the relaxing sound of water running from the master bedroom en suite. Relief settled her queasy stomach and she sighed.
So it still bothered her after all this time. Here she’d hoped she’d grown up some. Pushing the covers off her, she pulled an afghan from the foot of the bed and wrapped it around herself as she walked to the window. She pulled back the curtain and groaned at the sight of the winter wonderland outside. Her shoulder muscles tensed and the pain radiated to her neck, and she turned her head from side to side to stretch out the knots. No sense worrying about Natasha and her job. This particular circumstance was out of her control, and if Natasha couldn’t see that then she’d be losing a great assistant. Karen saw her attempt at looking confident in the window’s reflection and frowned. Oh, who was she kidding? Natasha probably had a happy dance choreographed and ready to go, but not without one last coffee run request.
Turning away from the window, Karen debated crawling back under the warm duvet and waiting for Leo to join her. Unfortunately, nature’s call urged her into the washroom.
Leo peeked around the shower curtain when she entered, and smiled. His gaze focused on her breasts. “Morning.”
“Morning. I need to use the toilet.”
Leo disappeared behind the shower curtain. “Don’t let me stop you.”
When had she become so comfortable with this man that she could go to the washroom with him in the room? After all the things they had done the night before was when. Karen’s cheeks burned remembering what they had done with the wine.
He’d kept her up most of the night as they’d rediscovered each other, and it was better than she’d ever dreamed. He’d whispered Italian love words in her ear, but her favorite moment was the one in which he’d said, “My love.” It had struck a chord even she hadn’t realized she’d had.
What they had yet to discuss was his revelation that the bone-melting kiss in the restaurant had been from Leo…
“Are you joining me any time soon?” Leo called from the other side of the curtain.
Karen shook off the bit of joy and confusion that had settled in her belly and flushed the toilet. Leo’s shrieks were music to her ears as she joined him.
»»•««
“How much time do you need to get ready?” Leo asked as he towel-dried his hair after their extra-long session of lovemaking in the shower.
“Not too long. I need to ask Bea if she has a blow dryer.”
“Okay, good. I’ll go find Walter and get a few more details worked out.”
“Are you going on a tour of the vineyard?”
“I doubt it.” He pulled the curtain back and looked outside. “It may be sunny, but there’s a lot of snow.”
Karen joined him at the window. “Are we going to be able to get your car out of here?”
The scent of Dove soap from her skin invaded his senses, along with a hint of mint. If he didn’t watch it, he’d have her naked and back in that bed.
Leo stepped away to help clear his head. “Walter already offered to pull us to the main road.”
Karen turned to face him, a small frown on her face. “Really?”
“We could stay here another night,” he suggested.
Her hesitation gave him a bit of hope, but then she sighed and shook her head. “We can’t.”
And there it was—back to reality.
“Another time then?”
“Perhaps.”
Leo watched as the look in her eyes turned wary. She didn’t trust him, and he still didn’t know how to open up. With her or his family. The protective armor was always on. Well, he didn’t need this grief, he decided suddenly. He had more important things to worry about—like getting his Porsche back to New York in one piece.
He placed a chaste kiss on her cheek and left the room.
His search for Walter ended quickly as he found him behind the front desk assisting another couple. Zipping up his coat, Leo went outside to find his car free of snow and a plowed path leading into the treed archway.
He unlocked the car door, sat behind the steering wheel, and turned the key in the ignition. The engine roared to life. He could always rely on his metal baby to behave. Unlike a certain woman inside the warm and cozy B&B. Last night she had been all fire and passion, a dream come true. Hell, thinking about their shower earlier this morning had him hard and aching. Then she had done a one-eighty and pow— she was a woman he didn’t recognize. A woman who lacked confidence in her job, her ability to lead, and her talent for design.
But even more irksome was the thought of Karen with Paul. And if he weren’t careful, Leo would push her right into his arms.
He turned off the engine and headed back to the foyer, where Walter sat waiting for him. He placed his hopes on shop talk to cure his troubled thoughts as he followed Walter back outside.
»»•««
The enticing aroma of homemade bread filled Karen’s nostrils as she strolled into the kitchen. Bea stood at the counter forming buns and humming a tune that reminded Karen of a lullaby.
“Good morning, Bea.”
“Ah, there you are. How did you sleep?”
Karen’s cheeks burned under Bea’s scrutiny. “Umm, good.”
“I think not. You didn’t sleep.” Bea winked at her and returned her concentration to the dough.
Karen’s mind raced. Had they been loud the night before? Had the other guests complained? OMG.
“Bea, if we disturbed anyone—”
“Don’t be silly,” Bea scolded. She put the last bun in the pan beside her, laid a towel on top, and then placed the pan on the table in a ray of sunshine to rise. “Now come wash up and knead this for me. My hands aren’t what they used to be.”
Karen did as she was told. She sprinkled some flour on the dough and powdered her hands then started working the dough—out, over, in, flip. The repetitive movements were relaxing, and soon her tense shoulder muscles loosened.
Being in the kitchen cooking brought back wonderful memories of when Anna and her aunt and uncle lived with her. A year ago, their house had been slated for demolition, so Karen had invited them into her home. She’d loved having them there. People to care for and to have conversations with, other than her cat, Charlie. Having lost her parents to a car crash when she was eighteen, Karen cherished families that were still together. Perhaps if she hadn’t been an only child…
Which was why Leo’s attitude toward his family drove her crazy. Didn’t he know how lucky he was to have people who loved him, people to joke and laugh with, fight with, rely on…unconditionally?
But she knew most families didn’t fit that happily-ever-after mold.
“Karen, dear. You’re beating up the poor dough.”
Bea’s voice cut through her thoughts. Karen groaned, put her hands up, and stepped back from the counter.
“Sorry.”
“You’re sorry for many things.”
Karen wanted to blame it on her Canadian roots but bit her tongue. “Apparently so.”
“Is it about your man, Leo?”
“Oh, he’s not my man.” Karen avoided Bea’s glare as she pulled leftover dough off her hands.
“You are a smart woman?”
Karen lifted her chin and met Bea’s gaze. “I like to think so.”
“Then you’re short-sighted.”
“Well, yes, I do wear glasses when I have detailed seamstress work to do, but—”
“You love him.”
Karen’s mouth dropped open. A deafening silence filled the kitchen. Only after a minute could she hear a clock ticking in the other room. A rush of heat flowed from her head to her toes, and then her cheeks turned icy. She thought she might faint. “I…no.”
“Ha. You young know nothing.”
“I think I would know if I was in love.” Bea grunted and took over kneading the dough. “And no disrespect, but you don’t even know me. This is the first time we’ve spoken since we arrived yesterday.”
Bea kept her head down and her hands busy. “You are scared.”
Karen stared at Bea. She wasn’t scared—she was terrified. All her bravado of a moment ago vanished, and she bowed her head. “How do you…? I don’t understand.”
Her stomach swirled with anxiety, and the urge to shout overwhelmed her.
Bea wiped her hands on the towel she’d flung over her shoulder and made her way over to Karen. She took her hands and squeezed, the warmth like a soothing balm.
“I have been around for a long, long time, Miss Karen. Young couples, old couples…so much alike when they come to visit our B&B.”
Karen looked into Bea’s eyes, and the wisdom she saw in them awed her.
Bea led her to the window nook and they sat. “There is false love. Hateful looks and words meant to hurt and belittle the other. Then we have one-sided love, where usually the man goes out of his way to impress the woman and gets nothing back.”
Reclining against the window, Karen tucked her leg under her bum and relaxed. Bea’s voice took on a hypnotic tone that eased the anxiety building up in Karen’s stomach.
“We must not forget the lovey-dovey lovers who make you want to gag.”
Karen laughed. “Definitely not.”
“Another form of false love. It may seem cute in the eyes of the public, but once they get home it is a poisoned love doomed to fail, because there is no communication, lots of secrets, and no common ground.
“And then we have real love. These couples fight, laugh, talk, care, kiss, and when the other is not looking, they are smitten. You and Leo have real love. I can feel it down to my bones.”
Karen shook her head. “We are experts at fighting.”
“Good.”
“There hasn’t been much laughing this past week.”
“But there has been some?”
“Yes,” Karen agreed as the week reeled through her mind.
“And you have good talks, yes?”
A sarcastic laugh left her lips. “No, we don’t. I try, I really do, but he always changes the subject.”
“What do you ask him about?”
This woman had no shame, Karen realized. And for some reason, neither did she. “Well…why he left me without a word five years ago.”
“Hmm, I would want an answer too.”
“See! I’m not being unreasonable.”
“But, do you want this answer?”
Karen caught herself before shouting out a wholehearted yes. Hadn’t she been telling herself lately that it didn’t matter anymore after all these years?
“My head says it doesn’t matter, but he broke my heart—and my heart wants to know.”
“The heart sometimes wants what it doesn’t need.”
More words of wisdom, and how true they were, Karen thought.
“He has a secret. A big one that he’s not willing to share, even after all this time. How am I supposed to trust him?”
“Secrets are not wise.”
“I know. What could possibly be so bad that he doesn’t think I’d understand? Unless he killed someone, he really has nothing to worry about.”
The front desk bell rang and Bea dashed out of the room. She sure could move fast for a lady in her seventies, Karen thought.
Karen walked back to the kitchen island and tried her hand at forming buns. She filled the baking pan and placed it with the others to rise. Hers were smaller, but she hoped Bea wouldn’t mind.
Leo and Walter returned as she was kneading the remaining dough for the last batch.
“How did it go?” Karen asked as she brushed at the flour that covered the front of her dress.
“Really well. There’s way more to this property than I imagined. And you’ve taken a new post as kitchen assistant, I see.”
Karen could picture the smirk on his face, but she refused to look. “Bea entrusted me with her special bun-forming technique…and she’s a way better boss.”
Leo grinned. “How hard will it be to tear you away from all this?”
Karen hesitated long enough to see Leo’s brow crease in worry. “I’m in no hurry to get back.”
“I know, but…”
“You will stay for lunch, then you can go.” Bea rushed back into the kitchen and took Karen’s post. “Go wash up,” she added, and with expert precision she had the rest of the buns ready to go in record time.
With no more time to talk about what awaited them when they returned to Vale Designs, Karen and Leo pitched in to prepare a simple meal of fresh buns, cold cuts, cheese and pickles, and, of course, wine. Conversation centered around the property, with questions and observations Leo had regarding the vineyard.
Karen couldn’t help but notice how excited Leo sounded. He’d borrowed her notebook and started taking his own notes and doodling images she didn’t recognize of the yard.
If only he could see past the issues he had with his family and embrace what he was so obviously good at. He even had Walter and Bea excited about the future prospects.
And maybe, just maybe, he’d stay in New York.
But would she? It really depended on Natasha’s wrath. Even if Natasha didn’t fire her, could she live with the daily tirades that would be so much worse?
Perhaps a new job search was in order. Something a little more prestigious than assistant. She took a long sip of her wine and pictured the gown on her dress form in her room. It was almost complete, and she itched to be home to apply the finishes Anna had suggested. She’d sent her pictures before leaving on her Valentine’s date, and Anna had replied right away. Anna’s excitement over the project had boosted Karen’s much-needed confidence, and thoughts of wanting more out of a job than fetching coffee for the evil witch of New York bloomed.
After the meal, Bea put Karen and Leo to work at the sink washing and drying the dishes as she packed a basket of buns and homemade strawberry jam for them to take home. The normalcy of this household chore gave the moment an intimacy she didn’t think possible, and a small spark of excitement took hold. Her feelings for Leo were more than an infatuation with their past relationship. She loved the man he was today. Karen’s heart raced as she glanced over at Leo, who turned to grab more dirty dishes from the counter. Fear soon replaced excitement as she thought about the secret he kept from her. Feeling a bit woozy, she grabbed onto the sink’s edge to steady herself.
He’s leaving in a few days, her subconscious whispered. Then what? Real love and secrets didn’t mix, no matter how much she wanted Bea to be right.
Half an hour later, with chores complete and basket in hand, Karen embraced Bea in a tight hug. “I’ve known you for less than twenty-four hours and I’m sad to be leaving.”
“Be strong and patient. Your man will smarten up soon,” Bea whispered near her ear.
Karen pulled away. “How do you…?”
Bea touched her heart and Karen smiled. Oh, how she wanted to believe her. “Thank you.”
Walter, with his tractor, guided them to the highway. All the snow had melted into slush puddles scattered across the road. With conversation at a minimum, Karen kept her eyes on the road and the music low so Leo could concentrate. It took an extra hour to reach the city, and with each passing minute her anxiety increased.
Leo was unable to find a parking spot anywhere in the vicinity of the office building, so Karen asked to be dropped off out front.
“I’ll find a spot and meet you up there. Don’t do anything stupid,” Leo advised before pulling away from the curb.
“Thanks for the words of encouragement,” Karen mumbled. She faced the door, took a deep breath, and with head held high, marched inside and onto the elevator.
»»•««
Leo had to park five blocks away. “This is why I have a chauffeur,” he muttered as he flipped his coat collar up to ward off the biting wind. Out at Bea and Walter’s it’d been calm and sunny. Back in the city, snow had started falling again and the sky was gray and gloomy. From clouds or smog, he couldn’t tell.
As he trudged down the slush-covered sidewalk, his cell phone rang. Leo glanced at the screen, which flashed a picture of his dad, and he pressed the talk button.
“Hey, Dad.”
“Did you get a chance to look at that property in Hudson Valley?” Leo got his bad phone manners from his father.
“It’s a B&B, Dad. A real gem.”
His father sighed. “We don’t have time to invest in a B&B, Leo, let alone learn anything about running one.”
“They have a vineyard.”
“Oh, good. What are the specs?”
“About five acres.”
“Tiny—”
“Good crop, and the wine is delicious,” Leo interjected.
His father grunted. “Not worth our time. I’ll tell your mother.”
“Dad?” Leo spoke into the phone, but there was only silence. He ended the call, tucked the phone into his jacket pocket, and swore.
His father may just have well said, “You’re not worth our time.”
Damn him. What had gotten his goat anyway? Leo wondered. In all honesty, his father was usually the most pleasant one in the family. Did the meetings in France not go well? Did he and Mom get into a fight? Yes, that sounded more reasonable. They had at least three big fights throughout the year. It was February. Valentine’s Day? Nah, his mother didn’t care about that frivolous day.
No anniversaries to forget. Birthdays…
Yes…a specific birthday. Leo stopped on the spot as his heart raced, and an instant headache pounded on his temples.
Today was his sister’s birthday—would have been her birthday.
Leo’s mind started to race. How could he possibly have forgotten? The surrounding buildings seemed to close in around him and his breathing became labored. He needed to get out of there. He spun around and headed back to his car as flashes of his sister, Emily, popped in his head. A swimming pool, Emily laughing…then silence. He’d jumped into the water and grabbed her, but he was too late. She was dead.
Leo broke out in a cold sweat. Where the hell was his car? He ran a block, then two, and finally found his car parked outside a rundown pub. He took in his surroundings and noticed most of the neighboring buildings matched the look of the pub. Situated behind a greasy and dusty solitary window was a flashing red “Open” sign. Feeling reckless and thirsty, Leo went inside.
The interior showed no better than the outside. It was dark and dingy; a single light bulb hung above the only pool table, and the area behind the bar was lit by cheesy fluorescent signs depicting naked women. The overwhelming scent of stale beer assaulted his nostrils.
A burly man with a full beard, shiny bald head, and tattooed arms stood behind the counter organizing bottles.
“What can I get ya?” the man grumbled without a glance in Leo’s direction.
He shouldn’t be there. Hell, he shouldn’t be in New York. He should be home paying his respects at his sister’s grave.
“Ya going to decide or what?” The bartender’s growl was much louder now that Leo had his attention.
“Scotch on the rocks.” Decision made, Leo sat on the stool across from the bartender and slowly massaged his temples. The place matched his mood—dark and dangerous. “Leave the bottle.”
»»•««
The elevator opened, and Karen stepped into the Vale Designs foyer. It was four o’clock in the afternoon and business as usual from what she could see. She didn’t want anyone to see her and she sure as hell didn’t want to talk to anyone, so instead of going to her desk, as would be her norm, she headed straight to Natasha’s office.
After knocking twice, Karen opened the door. Natasha was sitting at her desk, phone to her ear, chewing on a pencil end. Once Karen was spotted, Natasha hung up on whoever was babbling in her ear and placed the pencil gently on the desk.
“Do you know what day it is?” Natasha asked as she stood and rounded her desk.
“Of course.” Karen bristled at the question but kept calm.
“Do you know what day it is?” Natasha repeated.
“Thursday,” Karen enunciated slowly.
“Do you work on Thursdays?” Natasha sat on the corner of her desk and folded her hands in her lap.
“Yes.”
“Were you at work today?”
Oh, this is ridiculous! “You know I wasn’t at work today.” So much for keeping her cool.
“And yesterday, where were you then?”
“On a photo shoot with Leo—”
“On a photo shoot, my ass.” Natasha rose and crossed the span between them in three long strides.
“You okayed it!”
“I didn’t know—”
“You know all goings on here.”
Natasha said nothing, her gaze drawn to the door. “Where is Leo, by the way? I thought he’d be here to back you up.”
Good question. He knew how much she needed him. “He’s on his way up. He went to park the car.”
“His Porsche?”
Karen frowned. “Yes.”
“Love that car.” Natasha returned to her chair. “I’m surprised he has it out in this weather.” Her concern sounded syrupy and fake.
“It wasn’t ideal. It took an extra hour to get back to the city.”
Natasha’s eyes narrowed in suspicion. “I didn’t approve an out-of-town photo shoot, especially in the middle of winter.”
Karen winced at her error. “I’m sure Leo wouldn’t have gone behind your back and booked something on his own.” Or would he?
“I wouldn’t put it past him…or you.”
“Me? I did nothing but go on this assignment with your blessing. I can’t control the weather or the unfortunate means of transportation.”
“I needed you here.”
For what? Her daily coffee run? “I tried—”
“I doubt it.” Natasha flicked her hand in dismissal.
Something snapped in Karen’s head. Flick that hand again.
Natasha stood, her gaze never leaving Karen, and flicked her hand so hard and fast her wrist cracked. Karen’s eyes widened in surprise, while Natasha’s mocked her.
“You were never good at keeping your thoughts to yourself.”
“And you were never good at being nice.”
She’d overstepped her bounds. Natasha’s eyes closed to mere slits and her mouth pulled into a tight line.
“You’re the worst assistant ever,” Natasha spat back.
“And you are the world’s meanest boss.” Karen couldn’t keep her true thoughts from stumbling out her mouth.
Why were they doing this? Acting like a couple of spoiled brats in a who-could-say-the-meanest-thing-ever contest.
Catching her off guard, Natasha jabbed her finger into Karen’s chest and pushed as hard as she could. Karen grabbed onto Natasha’s arm to keep from falling back.
“I hate you.” Natasha’s voice was eerily calm.
“The feeling is mutual.” Karen sneered.
They stood facing each other, neither backing down. After a few minutes of silence, Natasha’s harsh demeanor returned and she forced out a sarcastic laugh.
“I have no idea why Leo wastes his time with you,” Natasha said.
With that barb well-aimed, Karen loosened her grip on Natasha’s arm and sat on the couch. Her heart was like a heavy weight in her chest. She’d so often asked herself that same question.
“Look, Leo has nothing to do with this—”
“Of course he does.” Natasha smoothed out her long locks and stood on shaky legs. “You may think because you were stranded with him overnight that you guys are an item now. Well, you can forget it. He’s not relationship material. He has so many ghosts haunting him.”
“Trying to scare me away so you can continue pursuing him by flaunting yourself like a show horse?”
A prickling of doubt crept into her heart as Natasha’s smile widened.
“Oh, I’ll always have a special place in Leo’s heart. Unlike you. You’re a passing fancy. Someone to keep him entertained while he’s away from home.”
“We’re old friends,” Karen said, but she knew how weak that sounded.
“Old friends, hey? You know about his sister then?”
His sister? “Of course.”
Natasha laughed at her shaky attempt at confidence. “Apparently not.”
“You’ll say anything to hurt me. You’ve made it your number one mission since I arrived here.”
“I’m trying to toughen you up. The fashion world is very cutthroat.”
“You treat no one else at Vale Designs with such disrespect.” Karen’s chest ached where Natasha poked her, and her heart felt bruised. “And I’ve had enough.”
Natasha’s surprise should’ve had Karen floating around the room in elation, but her lack of sleep the night before, the nerve-wracking drive back to the city, and their physical confrontation left her drained. To top it off, it appeared Leo had left her hanging again. All his promises of being around for her were just empty puffs of smoke.
Maybe Natasha was right. She’d hoped after spending the night reconnecting with Leo that he’d changed. Foolish.
And what about his sister? He’d never mentioned her before. To be honest, Karen hadn’t even known he had a sister.
“Tell me about Leo’s sister.”
Natasha sighed and started pacing the space between the couch and her desk. “It’s not really my story to tell…”
Frustration rose in Karen’s chest, pushing down the hurt. “Why did you mention her in the first place?”
“Because…” Natasha stopped in front of Karen and wrapped her arms around her midsection. “I can see how much you adore him, and I wanted to pop that illusion.”
“You love him?”
“No.”
“Oh, come on!”
“I used to…when we were teenagers.”
Right. Karen remembered Leo telling her about their high school friendship when they were in the women’s washroom the other day—after the whole stealing-last-year’s-design fiasco. An old friendship would explain why they were so at ease with each other. She envied that.
“He’s always been the one that got away, but I’ve settled for what we have now.” Back in her chair, Natasha spun around to face the windows.
Settled? Did romantic emotions still linger for her? It made sense that she wanted to sabotage any plans Karen had for a relationship. Did Leo know how unhealthy Natasha’s feelings were?
“How’s mentioning Leo’s sister going to pop my illusions?”
Natasha stood and walked over to the windows. A mild smirk played at the corners of her mouth. “She’s his ghost.”
Karen paled and a chill ran up her spine. His ghost? “She’s dead?”
“Yes. She’s been dead for ten years,” a low voice rumbled behind her.
Karen jumped off the couch and turned to see Leo standing in the doorway. She wanted to berate him for taking so long, but then she noticed how his posture was slouched and how his hair looked messy from the wind…or from running his hands through it one too many times. Something was wrong.
“Leo?” Karen walked slowly toward him, afraid to scare him off.
“Emily is dead,” Leo blurted out. He tried to stand up straight, but he fell back against the doorframe.
“You’re drunk.” Anger ripped through Karen like nothing she’d ever experienced. He’d gone to a bar to get drunk instead of being by her side.
Leo hiccupped. “You bet.”
Karen grabbed her purse and coat. A raging storm swirled inside her at the betrayal, but disappointment sat like a boulder on her heart. Tears welled in her eyes, but she refused to let them fall. When she spoke, it was barely more than a whisper.
“I’m done—with both of you.” She turned to Natasha. “I quit.”
Then she turned back to Leo and swallowed the huge lump of emotion caught in her throat. “I never want to see you again.”
And she walked out without a second glance.