The following Saturday afternoon's session with Reverend Johnny Swag was Kallie's fourth one of the week, and she was finally beginning to see the fruits of his “priming” technique. She could now make out parts of a face. She was lying down on the couch in Swag's office. Swag was sitting near her head in a brown leather rollback chair.
“Keep your eyes closed,” Swag said. “Relax and clear your mind of everything but that face.”
Kallie squeezed her eyes closed tighter.
Swag patted her arm, admonishing her gently. “Don't press. It'll come. But you have to relax every part of your body, including your eyes.”
“Okay,” Kallie said, and almost immediately, her arms and shoulders slumped imperceptibly and her eyelids stopped twitching.
“Good,” Swag said. “Now tell me what you see.”
She breathed in deeply. “Black eyes, flat nose, dark skin. But not dark like an African-American, more like extremely tanned. His facial expression is sad, but determined. It's in his eyes. He believes in what he's doing. He feels duty-bound.”
“Can you smell anything? Any kind of scent?”
At first she thought it was a weird question. How could she smell an image? But then, her nose started twitching. She could, in fact, smell something. It was a kind of cleanliness, a lemon freshness mixed with aerosol. “I smell disinfectant, like in a hospital or a clean public bathroom.”
“That's good,” Swag said. “Your senses are coming alive. Continue to relax. Let it come to you.”
“Okay.”
“Now pull back from the face.”
“Okay.”
“Where are you?”
“It's a room. I see a mirror. I see his face in the mirror. He's looking at himself.”
“That's good. Now, I want you to listen. Tell me what you hear.”
She sat still, straining her ears. But, she could hear nothing. And after a while, the mirror and the face in it started to fade. “It's leaving me!” she said in a near panic. “Everything's going away.”
He touched her arm gently. “Stay calm. It's all right. That's enough for now. Open your eyes.”
She opened her eyes and sat up on the couch. She rubbed her forehead with the palms of her hands, trying to reorient herself with the present. “What happened? Everything started disappearing.”
Swag slid from his rolling chair and came to her on the couch. “It's normal.”
“Really?”
“Yes. You're almost there.”
“It sure doesn't feel like it. Everything's kinda jumbled up. I can't tell my current memories from the previous life-cycle memories.”
“It'll come. You don't have as far to go as you think. Developing your ability to remember is not like learning a martial art where you have to spend years learning your craft. The priming technique is more like prying open a locked door. Now that the door is cracked, it won't be long before the memories push through, flooding your mind. When that happens, you'll be able to separate them. Believe me.”
“You make it sound as if it could happen any day now.”
Swag smiled. “That's because it could. But don't worry. I'll be here to help you navigate through it.” He shifted and patted her knee delicately. “Now how does a piping hot pizza sound? I'm talking pepperoni, sausage, cheese, and green peppers. I know a place that has the best pizza in these parts. It'll help take your mind off memories.”
“That sounds great, but I'll have to take a rain check.”
A corner of his mouth rose up slightly, a minor show of disappointment that she didn't notice. “Already have plans?” he asked.
“Sort of. I have a friend who wants to take me to a movie and some other friends who want me to go dancing with them. I haven't decided which to do yet.”
“I see. Is the friend male or female?”
“Why you ask?”
“Why can't the whole group go either to a movie or dancing? Either they're friends of yours who don't get along or the movie-friend is a boy?”
She smiled. “That's very perceptive of you.” She remembered Seth, Josh, and Quiggy's, and then nixed the idea of having the two of them back together so soon. “My movie-friend is a male, but I don't think he's very much into dancing.”
“Okay,” Swag said, “it was just a thought.” He paused. “I wasn't aware you were dating. Is it serious?”
She regarded him for a moment, not sure why he was asking or even interested in her love life. As if reading her mind, he added, “I know it's none of my business. But I have a lot of young people in my congregation, and I've gotten my fair share of calls on matters of the heart, usually from a young lady after some young Romeo has broken hers.”
It hadn't crossed her mind that Seth could break her heart, and now that it had, she inexplicably felt a sudden tinge of vulnerability and fear. “No one likes dealing with a broken heart,” she said remotely.
“Have you ever had your heart broken?”
“No. But I've never been in love before either.”
“Are you in love now?”
She looked at him and started to say something, but hesitated.
“If you feel it's too personal a question, you don't have to answer.”
“No, it's not that. I don't mind answering.” And she really didn't. She didn't know if it was the ivory-white clerical collar around Swag's neck or what. But she felt extremely comfortable talking to him. “I don't know if I'd clarify it as love. I'd say that I'm in strong like with somebody.”
“You're in strong like. That's an interesting way to put it,” Swag said. He held his hand out to her. “Let me see your hand.”
She looked at him curiously for a moment before tentatively giving him her hand.
He took her hand, turning it palm up. “I'm going to read your palm.”
“Read my palm? I didn't think Rememberers had to do such things.”
“Of course we don't have to do it,” he said smiling, “but palm reading is a very useful skill to have.” Squeezing her hand gently, he studied her palm for a moment, before slowly tracing his finger along the lines of it. “Ah, I do see love in your future.”
“You do?” she said, a feeling of excitement rising. “Is it Seth?”
He was still studying her palm intently. “Who's Seth?”
“The boy I'm in strong like with.”
Swag looked up briefly. “I can't say for certain if it's Seth,” he said before looking back at her palm. “I do see a man, a strong one. I see someone who's very knowledgeable in the ways of the world. He's someone who's capable of opening your eyes to all its possibilities. Is this Seth such a person?” He spoke slowly, deliberately. His words felt soft, almost sensual to her ears. He looked up, staring into her eyes.
Her breath caught in her throat. “I…I don't know if he is.”
“You should know before you fall in love with him.”
It suddenly felt very warm in the room. She pulled her hand back. “I've got to go. I have a million things to do before I meet my friends tonight.”
“So you've decided to go dancing.”
Feeling flushed, she said, “Dancing. Yeah, I'm going dancing.”
* * *
“So, what's this guy's name?” Maggie asked.
They were in Kallie's car, driving down the interstate, heading to the club that was located just outside Charlotte.
Kallie took her eyes off the road momentarily to glare at her housemate. “I've told you a million times already. His name's Josh.”
“Josh,” Maggie said in a near whisper as she stared out the car window. Kallie could tell that she was trying to picture what Josh looked like. For all her talk about just being at Bengate for an education and not to man hunt, Kallie knew that Maggie was still a vibrant young woman, and for most women, in fact most people, the desire for human companionship always beckoned at some point. It was no different for Maggie. Kallie hadn't had to twist her arm to get her to come with her to the club. And the old girl had even cleaned up rather nicely. She was wearing a cute blue dress that fit her form perfectly. Kallie hadn't thought Maggie owned anything but sweats and oversized shirts. She'd said exactly that to Maggie earlier when they'd both been getting dressed for the evening. Maggie had simply responded, “I have other things for other occasions.”
“You mean special occasions,” Kallie had said.
“Just other occasions,” Maggie had replied and finished dressing without saying anything more, letting the words hang ghostlike in the air.
“You say he's a grad student,” Maggie said now, still staring out the car window. “Why would he want to meet an underclassman? Is he some kind of freak or something?”
“Maggie, you're incorrigible. No, he's not a freak. I've told you. He and his friends spend most of their time with their noses in books, so they're a little, how would you say, socially challenged.”
“Oh right, you mean nerds. They're nerds. She's setting me up with a nerd.”
“No, they're not nerds, at least not classically. You won't see any pocket protectors tonight or anything like that.”
“Does he wear glasses?”
“I've never seen him in any,” Kallie said. “Now would you just relax? It's not like it's a blind-blind date. I know him. We're meeting them at the club. Other people will be there. So, there's no pressure. I'm just putting two of my friends in close proximity to each other. I'm going to introduce you. You'll talk, maybe dance, and then we'll just let nature do what nature does.”
“Okay, one final question. If he's such a great guy, why didn't you keep him for yourself?”
“Friend zone,” Kallie said without hesitating. There was no need for any additional explanation. Besides, no girl could adequately explain why some guys landed in friend zone. But once trapped in the sometimes dreaded place, it was extremely rare for someone to escape it, sometimes to the chagrin of the girl, the guy, or both.
Maggie accepted that response and the two of them rode in silence, hearing only the sounds of the other vehicles flowing along with them on the interstate, carrying souls with plans of their own for the night, to points near and far.
After a while, Maggie turned to her. “Is Seth upset about you choosing your fat friend and the nerds over him?”
“I'm going to ignore your caddish references,” she said and paused. Then, “A little I suppose, especially since I've hardly seen him this week. But he's going to go to church with me tomorrow.”
“Man, you guys spend an awful lot of time in church. You'd think Seth would get the hint and run screaming in the other direction.”
Kallie glanced at her. “What hint?”
“That you're preparing him for a walk down the altar.”
“Girl, please. I'm not trying to get married anytime soon. Besides, going to church was his idea, not mine.”
Maggie laughed. “Then, maybe you're the one who should be getting the hint.”
The Tom-Tom Club was created out of the remains of a forty thousand square foot former distribution warehouse. It was located in the middle of a vast field in Chesterfield, SC, less than an hour's drive from Bengate's campus. Co-owned by Thomas Valley and Tomas Martinez, two thirty-something year old UNC MBA graduates, the club was the latest and greatest attraction for college kids in the Charlotte metro area. Rumor was that despite the fact that their first names were variations of Tom; the owners hadn't named the place after themselves. Instead, it was said that the name was an ode to the eighties duo of the same name. Thomas Valley was supposedly enthralled by the duo's song Genius of Love, especially the lyrics, 'There's no beginning and there is no end. Time isn't present in that dimension.'
Neither owner would confirm or deny the allegation. But the Tom-Tom Club, which also included an onsite restaurant, frequently employed an erratic schedule particularly on weekends, student breaks, and during the summer months. During these times, the club's hours fluctuated. It sometimes opened at noon and closed at midnight. Sometimes it opened at midnight, closing at noon. Other times, it opened at four in the afternoon, closing at four in the morning, and vice-versa. To ensure a steady crowd whenever it opened, the club offered free admission, half-off dinner entrees, and the occasional, surprise celebrity (P-Diddy, who'd once sampled the Tom-Tom Club's song on a Mariah Carey track, showed up one time at 4 a.m. and partied until nine that morning.) to the first so many patrons. The opening times were never announced in advance, so in order to be amongst the first inside, students had to drive to the club an hour or so before a possible opening time, thus keeping the club's parking lot constantly buzzing with activity. This had the added effect of making it seem as if the club was open infinitely.
By 10 p.m., the Tom-Tom Club's parking lot was filled to capacity and the long, narrow two-lane road leading up to it was lined with vehicles seemingly for miles away in either direction. Kallie parked her Honda behind a white Tahoe. As she and Maggie started to open their respective car doors, Kallie's cell phone chimed, momentarily freezing the two girls in place. Kallie pulled the phone out of her purse. The caller ID screen read Josh.
She brought the phone up to her ear. “What's up?”
“Where are you?” Josh asked.
“I just parked the car down the road. I didn't know it was going to be this packed.”
“I don't know why not. I told you it would be. When you get here, don't wait in line. Go straight to the front and tell them that your name is on the list.”
“Maggie's, too?”
“Who's Maggie?”
“My friend.”
“No, it's Steve what's his name.”
Kallie's throat tightened. “His name's Seth and I told you he wasn't coming.”
Josh laughed. “Calm down, Tiger. I was only kidding. You're listed as Kallie Hunt plus one.”
“Ha, ha,” Kallie said. “We'll see you inside.” She pressed END and put the cell phone back into her purse. She looked over at Maggie. “Let's go. We're on the list.”
There was a sharp coolness in the air. The temperature had dropped thirty degrees from today's high of seventy. Kallie and Maggie fell in behind a sweet-smelling hoard of young people moving lockstep between the line of cars and the edge of the field.
Maggie's lower lip quivered from a mixture of cold and nervousness. “How do nerds get names on the list of a popular club?”
With wisps of her breath clearly visible in the cold, moonlit night, Kallie answered rather simply, “They know one of the Toms.”