The next day after work, Seth made the drive over to the suburb where Logan lived. Apparently neither of them had regained their right minds, and they were actually going to stick with the crazy deal they’d made. Granted, Logan was being evicted and didn’t have much choice. Seth couldn’t exactly back out and leave the guy out in the cold.
Light snow fell in the early darkness after five p.m., and he shivered, turning up the heater. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get used to northern winters. Where he’d grown up in Georgia, if there was even a hint of a flurry everything ground to a halt. Of course, they didn’t have snow tires down south, and now his SUV was fully equipped for the worst Mother Nature could—and would—throw at him.
So far there was just a dusting of snow over everything, and as Seth turned off the main road and into a residential area, colored Christmas lights gleamed on houses and wrapped around trees, the snow making everything magical. “I’ll be Home for Christmas” played on the radio, and though Seth braced for the pang of longing, it still stole his breath when it hit.
Christmas had always been his favorite time of year, with the lights and music, the smell of fresh cookies baking, and presents under the tree. Friends and family gathered together to celebrate that holy holiday. He’d actually liked going to church around Christmas, singing carols joyfully until his voice was hoarse, no one minding that he couldn’t carry a tune to save his life.
He snapped off the radio. It would definitely be only in his foolish dreams that he would ever be home for Christmas again. He didn’t even own decorations. Brandon had never been keen on celebrating, and after the terrible holiday twelve years ago, it had all seemed poisoned to Seth. Christmas wasn’t for him now.
Following his phone’s directions, Seth turned down a few streets, the houses getting a little more rundown and ramshackle. Number eighty-two was a small bungalow and didn’t have any holiday lights or decorations. He recognized Jenna’s SUV outside and parked behind it, his headlights illuminating the boxes already packed high inside.
Snow crunched under Seth’s boots as he got out and walked up the driveway, keeping his bare hands in his coat pockets. The wind was calm, fat snow drifting down peacefully. However, that peace was broken by the shouts exploding out of the house like the rat-tat-tat of gunfire even though the front door was closed. Seth stood on the stoop, debating whether to knock.
“That’s my shit! Don’t touch anything else!”
Logan’s rough voice rumbled. “I’m only trying to help.”
“You had no right to touch anything of mine!” a young voice screeched. That had to be Connor, the stepson.
“For fuck’s sake, I only packed the clothes hanging in the closet. I could have just moved all your stuff without telling you, but I didn’t want to invade your privacy. Now hurry up, because whatever you don’t get into these boxes in the next half hour is staying behind. You’ve wasted enough time arguing.”
“Fuck you! I’m not going anywhere.”
Logan’s voice rose. “Yes, you damn well are. We’re moving our shit over to Seth’s, and then I’m taking you back to school before curfew. So get a move on.”
Listening to the foul language in shock, Seth decided he’d better knock instead of eavesdrop, so he rapped his knuckles against the door. He knew he was laughably repressed when it came to cursing, but Logan and Connor just sounded so horribly angry towards each other.
When the door opened, Connor was still complaining loudly, but Seth blocked it out and focused on Logan, who ushered him in with a grimace. He wore a black T-shirt and jeans, the cotton hugging the firm, broad muscles of his chest and back. And jeez, his arms were nothing to sneeze at either. Seth had always thought Logan looked handsome in Jenna’s pictures, but in person he really was…wow.
“Hi. Sorry, it’s a bit…” As Connor screamed more curses, Logan winced, rubbing a hand over the scruff on his face with an audible rasp. Seth wondered what that would feel like against his own face.
“Chaotic?” Seth offered. “Moving always is.” He peered into the living room, which was still furnished with a plaid couch and a wooden coffee table. “You said the furniture isn’t yours?”
“Right. Rented a furnished place.” He glanced over his shoulder, dropping his voice. “When Veronica died, there were a lot of bills, and that was on top of what I still owed for my insurance copay on my hospital bills after the accident. Had to sell just about everything.”
Seth nodded, shame that he’d been ogling Logan twisting in his gut. The man’s wife died barely six months ago. Have some decency. “I understand. Well, I put the back seats down, so should be plenty of room for what’s left.”
“Thank you.” Logan winced at a thump from the direction of what had to be Connor’s room. “There’s still time to back out.”
A little voice did pipe up saying that Seth was biting off more than he could chew, but he couldn’t exactly leave Logan high and dry, now could he? He tried for an easy smile. “Nah, we made a deal. You’re helping me out just as much.”
Logan snorted. “Not sure if that’s true. But thanks.” He glanced down the hall. The cursing from Connor had faded. Logan still spoke softly. “I didn’t want to go through his stuff, so I picked him up after school to tell him in person. Give him a chance to pack up his things so he wasn’t completely blindsided.”
“Sounds like it’s been a barrel of laughs.” This earned him a sardonic smile from Logan, and Seth tried to ignore the sexy little dimples that appeared in Logan’s cheeks. Before Seth could say anything else, a gangly boy who needed a haircut appeared down the short hall. He wore uniform slacks and a white dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his bony elbows, his tie missing. He scowled at Seth.
“Oh, hello,” Seth said with a smile. “You must be Connor. I work with your Aunt Jenna. It’s nice to meet you.”
“She’s not really my aunt,” Connor muttered, crossing his arms.
“Connor,” Logan warned.
Seth smiled awkwardly. “Well… It’s still nice to meet you.”
“Whatever. I’m calling my dad, and he’s going to fly me to Florida for Christmas, so I’m not staying with you.”
Seth glanced at Logan, who only shrugged, his face impassive as he said, “Okay. Go ahead and call him.”
Connor glared. “I did. I left a message. He’ll call me back any minute. He’s probably still at work. He actually has a job since he’s not a loser like you.”
Waiting for Logan to scold Connor for the rude insult, Seth bit his tongue. But Logan didn’t rise to the bait, only saying, “In the meantime, keep packing.” He picked up a box in the hallway. “Seth, there isn’t too much to go into your SUV. It’ll mostly be Connor’s stuff.”
“Right. Uh, okay.” Seth fished out his keys and opened the front door for Logan, following him out into the snow. Flakes caught in Logan’s dark hair, his wide shoulders rigid as he walked out. At the SUV, Seth opened the back and said, “Don’t you want your coat?”
Logan’s muscles flexed as he pushed the box into the back. He straightened and blew out a long breath, his exhalation clouding in the cold air. “I’ll grab it in a sec. Just had to get out of there before we got in another fight.”
“Understood. I didn’t realize his father was still in the picture?”
Logan shook his head derisively. “He’s not—selfish piece of shit is what he is. He probably won’t even call back for days, and when he does, he’ll be full of excuses. But I try not to say a bad word about him to Connor.”
“Right,” Seth repeated. “That’s smart. Let him figure it out for himself.”
Logan shivered, rubbing his bare arms. Jenna’d mentioned that Logan had worked hard to get back in shape after recovering from the accident, and Seth couldn’t imagine how good he’d looked before it, although his brain stubbornly tried.
Logan said, “For a smart kid, it’s sure as hell taking him a while to get the message.”
Seth thought of his own parents—his mother’s round face and big eighties-style curls, his father’s balding head and wire-framed glasses—wondering what they would do if he actually called. “It can be hard to accept.” He knew without a doubt his parents would hang up on him, yet he still thought, Maybe…
“Although the kid’s right that his asswipe father does have a job, at least.”
“Hey, it’s not your fault you’re out of work.”
“That’s not what the railway says. Worked there more than a decade, and I’m out with nothing. I wasn’t speeding, and I know I braked in time. I know it.”
He was obviously referring to the accident. “I’m sure you did.”
“Doesn’t matter anyway. Except for the fact that I can’t seem to get another job without a reference since I worked there so long.” He headed back to the house. “Anyway.”
Seth followed him inside, standing in the doorway as Logan put on a black leather jacket and gloves. It was quiet from down the hall, and Seth hoped that meant Connor was packing. “In the new year, something will turn up.”
“Let’s hope so. For both our sakes.” Logan grimaced. “But don’t worry, I’ll figure something out. The deal is just until January and we’ll be out of your life. Thanks again.”
“Hey, you really are doing me just as big a favor.”
“What favor?” Connor asked. He must have been listening, and now he neared them in the foyer, his socked feet slapping on the parquet.
Seth’s heart sank at the thought of explaining it, embarrassment prickling his skin. He glanced at Logan, who sighed and mumbled to Seth, “Hadn’t got there yet.” Logan faced Connor. “It’s no big deal. Seth needs to pretend he’s getting married so he gets a promotion at work that he really deserves. So I’m going to be his fake fiancé.”
Connor’s face creased with confusion and possibly disgust. “What the fuck?”
It was entirely strange for Seth to hear a kid swear the way Connor did without being reprimanded. Seth would have been belted if so much as a “damn” or “hell” slipped out. Even “darn” or “jeez” or “heck” had been forbidden since they were clear derivatives of curses. Logan seemed to swear regularly, but he was an adult, at least.
Seth cleared his throat. “I’m sure it sounds a little confusing to you.” He tried to smile. “It’s a little confusing to us as well. It started as a white lie and snowballed into this…caper, I suppose you could call it.”
Connor stared at Seth, then Logan. To Logan, he hurled, “You’re gay now?” as if it was a barbed accusation.
“No. I’ll just be pretending for a little while. It’s not a big deal.”
Grunting, Connor shifted his focus to Seth, eyeing him up and down, his lip curling. “So you’re a fag no one wants to date?”
Seth flinched, not sure whether the slur or the accurate assessment of his love life hurt more. “Uh…”
Logan stared at Connor in apparent disbelief before drawing himself up even taller and barking, “What the hell kind of word is that? Jesus Christ, you know better.”
Connor opened his mouth as if to shout back, but then his pimply face flushed, his gaze dropping to his feet. He muttered, “Sorry.”
“What would your mother say, hearing you talk like that?”
In a flash, the defiant rage returned, Connor’s head snapping up and his eyes flashing. “She wouldn’t say anything. She’s dead. Because of you.”
Seth blinked in surprise. From what he recalled, it had been natural causes—an aneurysm, perhaps? Heart attack? But guilt definitely flinched across Logan’s face, his shoulders hunching as he muttered, “You know she’d hate to hear you talk like this anyway.”
To Seth, Logan added, “Sorry. Look, if you want to back out, I don’t blame you.” His gaze flicked up to Seth’s and then away miserably.
Resisting the urge to reach out and touch Logan’s arm, to give some kind of comfort, Seth shook his head. “No. We had a deal. Trust me, I’ve heard worse.”
Logan’s nostrils flared. “Well, you shouldn’t have to. And you won’t, at least not from Connor.” He raised an eyebrow at the boy. “Since when do you call gay people names? Isn’t your buddy Jayden gay?”
Connor fidgeted, his expression miserable. “Yes.” Then panic seemed to seize him, and he sucked in a breath and pleaded with Logan, eyes wide. “Don’t tell him I said that word!”
“I won’t,” Logan assured him. “I think it would hurt his feelings a lot.”
Exhaling, Connor nodded. To Seth, he added, “I didn’t mean it. I’m really sorry. I don’t know why I said it.”
Because you’re angry and confused and lashing out. Seth gave the kid a little smile. “Apology accepted. I’d really like to be friends. What do you say?” He extended his hand. Connor peered at it suspiciously before shaking it briefly, his small hand damp.
Fortunately, Connor was quiet after that, finishing packing his room and helping to carry the boxes without any more complaints. They piled up the back of Seth’s SUV and drove back to Saratoga Springs, Logan and Connor following in Jenna’s vehicle.
Turning into his hundred-foot driveway, Seth glanced at the retro metal mailbox by the curb, his stomach tightening at the flyers sticking out. He hadn’t checked the mail for two weeks. He should just bite the bullet and face what was likely inside, but…
I’ll look tomorrow.
After parking at the top of the drive, he followed the unshoveled brick path and climbed the two steps to the front door. The outdoor light had switched on automatically, and it illuminated the fluffy snow that was still drifting down. Logan and Connor approached, both gazing around.
Logan whistled softly. “Real beautiful home you have. Lots of land.”
“Thanks.” He pointed left and right. “You can see the lights of the neighbors through the trees. They’re close, but not too close, which is perfect for me.” He ushered them inside, all of them stamping their feet on the mat and taking off their snowy boots in the little foyer.
Seth pointed up the stairs, which extended back on the right-hand side of the house. “Two bedrooms and bathrooms up there.” To the left, he led them through the little sitting room area, which currently only held an armchair. “Uh, you can tell I haven’t finished furnishing the place yet.” He laughed awkwardly and continued on into the kitchen on the left and empty dining space to the right.
Logan examined the kitchen. “Did you demo some walls and open this up when you moved in?”
“Yes.” He winced, looking at the wide island and counters that were still covered in plywood, and the complete lack of cabinets. At least the medium hardwood flooring that ran through the whole main floor was done, although the walls where the blue-tinted subway tile back-splash would go were still bare.
“As you can see, it still needs some work. The pantry’s finished in the corner, so I’ve been storing food and whatnot in there.” He glanced to the bare room on the right. “Still need the dining table and chairs. When we moved up from Georgia we were going to buy most things new.”
Connor, who had poked his nose into the long pantry, asked, “Who’s ‘we’?”
Logan looked like he was about to chastise him, but Seth spoke before he could, keeping his tone light. “Well, ‘we’ was me and Brandon. We met in Atlanta at my first job out of college. Both worked in HR back then. We were together a long time, and when I was transferred here about a year and a half ago, I bought this house and Brandon came with me.” His throat got tight, and he cleared it. “But it didn’t work out. We broke up last October.”
“That sucks,” Connor said, going back to the pantry. He seemed to be eyeing the little collection of Halloween treats Seth had bought at half price on November first and hadn’t finished yet. He’d hidden up in his room on Halloween instead of shelling out, although he wasn’t sure any kids would have come by anyway.
Seth asked, “Are you hungry? Help yourself to whatever you like.”
Logan swore under his breath. “Forgot about dinner.”
“I’ll order a pizza.” Seth pulled out his phone. “What do you guys like?”
“No, I’ll order it. You already went out of your way to help us move our crap.” Logan took out his own phone.
Seth shook his head. “I insist. You can get the next pizza.” Of course he had no plans to let Logan pay for anything. For goodness’ sake, the man was jobless and evicted. He joked, “Trust me, there will be plenty of opportunities. I don’t cook as much as I should.” When it was just him, it didn’t seem worth the bother.
“Pepperoni and extra cheese,” Connor said. “Um, please. Thanks.” He held up a snack pack of Doritos. “Cool if I have these?”
“Absolutely,” Seth said. “Logan, what’s your pizza order?”
He shrugged. “Anything.” He examined the kitchen. “You said you have the cabinets and the counters already?”
“Yep. It’s all in the garage.” Seth tapped in an order for one pepperoni pizza and one sausage and mushroom, both with extra cheese. “Think it’s doable?”
“Definitely.” Logan glanced at the dining space. “You’re definitely going to need a table and chairs if the boss lady’s coming for dinner. It’s all painted, at least.”
“Right. Yes.” The white trim was done along with the pale gray walls. Seth groaned. “I shouldn’t have put it off so long.”
“We’ll figure something out. Don’t worry.”
“Whoa!” Connor’s exclamation echoed from beyond the short little space, barely a hall, that led to the great room at the back of the house.
Seth smiled as he and Logan joined him, taking the two steps down into the room. This was the space Seth could actually be proud of—a vaulted white ceiling with wood beams, tall and wide windows, a sleek gas fireplace stove in one corner and a massive TV in the other. A curved black leather sectional with chaises on both ends dominated the right side, facing the fireplace and the TV. On the far side of the room there was a sliding glass door to the patio.
“This is dope,” Connor said, gazing around in apparent awe.
Seth felt ridiculously pleased to have impressed him. “Thanks.”
Logan seemed equally awed. “Wow.” He walked across the thick area rug, which was a navy and gray diamond pattern, and cupped his hands around his eyes to peek out the sliding door. “Is that a built-in barbecue?”
“Yep. We had a gas line put in, so figured why not?” He’d barely used it, and shifted guiltily. “There’s a fire pit back there too. The outdoor space was a big selling point. And this room, of course. Got them to vault the ceiling and put in new windows. It was small and dim before, and now it’s, well, this. An improvement, I think.”
Logan gave him a look. “You could say that. Anyway, we should bring in the boxes. Have to get Connor back to school by nine.”
Mouth full of Doritos, Connor said, “Yeah, you’ll be in shit if you don’t.”
It was still jarring to hear the way Connor and Logan cursed freely around each other, but it wasn’t Seth’s place to say anything. Logan didn’t seem to think anything of it, but of course he’d been in the military. Seth imagined he’d become inured to obscenity.
They put their boots back on and went out, unloading the boxes and bags into the foyer. Between the three of them, it didn’t take long. There were some boxes of kitchen and miscellaneous items that Seth left in the empty sitting room before they took Connor’s things up to the spare room. It was a nondescript guest room—a double bed, dresser, closet, and generic art of a sailboat and a country road up on the pale gray walls.
Seth cleared his throat as Logan and Connor came in. “So, there’s only the one extra room. I figured two bedrooms would be enough since I don’t have any family and Brandon’s are real homebodies who don’t travel much. There was another small room, but we sacrificed it for the great room ceiling.”
Connor frowned. “Why don’t you have any family?”
“Don’t be nosy,” Logan snapped, a little harshly in Seth’s opinion.
Before Connor could retaliate, Seth said calmly, “It’s all right. I don’t mind talking about it.” It wasn’t pleasant, but he tried to be matter of fact about it when it came up. “My family cut me out of their lives after I told them I was gay. It was twelve years ago now. They’re very religious, and their church is quite homophobic. They believe I’m choosing a life of sin and all that kind of stuff.” He shrugged tightly. “I knew this could happen when I came out, but I’d hoped for the best anyway.”
Connor and Logan seemed to be taking it in. Logan shook his head and said, “Sorry, man.”
“It’s okay.” Seth forced a laugh. “I mean, it’s not okay, but it is what it is. I couldn’t stay in the closet. I like to believe in a God who made people the way they’re supposed to be.”
Connor was watching him silently. Then he said, “Your family are dicks, huh?”
Seth had to laugh for real this time. “They are.” Of course guilt slammed him immediately, and his smile faded. “I shouldn’t say that. They’re good people—they just have their beliefs.”
“That gay people are going to hell?” Connor asked, eyebrows shooting up. “That’s bullshit. Good people shouldn’t think that. And good people shouldn’t choose to never see their own kid again because of the way they were born.”
Logan said, “Hard to argue with that.”
“My friend Jayden? His parents are awesome. They love him the way he is. That’s what parents are supposed to do.”
Guilt still lingered, leaving sticky trails like gum on the bottom of Seth’s shoe, stuck in the crevices. He simply said, “Anyhow, we should get the sleeping arrangements sorted out.”
“Right. I’ll sleep on the couch if that’s okay?” Logan asked. “Connor, this can be your room while we’re staying with Seth.”
“You could stay in here while Connor’s at school.” Seth knew the couch was comfy, but he felt like a bad host regardless.
Connor stared at the wood floor. Logan said, “No, I’ll be good on the couch. Connor, why don’t you unpack a bit? We’ll bring the rest up before the pizza gets here.”
“Yes, should be soon,” Seth said. “The place I order from takes a while, but it’s worth it.” He gave Connor a smile and went back downstairs with Logan.
In the foyer, Logan glanced up behind him and whispered, “Hope it’s okay if I stay on the couch? He already had to move after his mom, and now this. I think it’ll help if he has his own space without me in it at all.”
“Of course. That makes perfect sense. He’s been through a lot of upheaval.”
“Thanks for getting it. And we’ll be out of your hair ASAP. I’m job searching every day, and either way we’ll be out in January.” He grimaced. “You’re sure it’s okay to be here over the holidays? You probably have plans.”
That would require having a life. “No, actually. I’m not really big on Christmas.”
“Oh.” His brow furrowed.
“What?” Seth shifted uneasily, trying to smile.
“You just seem like you’d be into all that wholesome holiday stuff.”
He probably finds me incredibly lame. Seth admitted, “I was, but…”
Understanding seemed to wash over Logan’s stubbly, handsome face. “Right. The family thing.”
“Yeah. Will you and Connor be with Jenna on Christmas? I know she loves it.” Poor Connor. His first Christmas without his mother, and he didn’t have a proper home.
“On Christmas Eve, I guess. She’ll be with her husband’s family on Christmas Day.” He waved a hand. “But we’ll do our best to stay out of your way. Thanks again for this.” Logan clapped a calloused hand on Seth’s shoulder, and Seth tried to ignore the tingle that spread through him at the strong, warm touch.
They went back to work, taking the rest of Connor’s boxes upstairs. The pizza arrived, and they all sat on the couch in the great room, the pizza sitting on the iron and wood coffee table on top of tea towels Seth spread so the grease didn’t seep through. He realized he was out of napkins, but they didn’t seem fazed by using paper towels.
He and Logan let Connor pick something on the TV, and he went for Mythbusters on one of the streaming channels, complimenting Seth on the surround sound from the home theater speakers he’d had installed. Seth sipped a Sprite and put a coaster under Connor’s cola.
He’d ordered a six-pack of soda since he realized he only had water, coffee, and tea on hand. He should make a list of what they liked and stock up, especially for Logan since Connor would still be at school before the family retreat.
Seth had to choke down his bite of pizza at the reminder of the retreat, the extra cheese almost lodging in his throat. Could he and Logan really fool everyone—and Angela in particular—into believing they were a couple? Was Connor going to behave? Would he even agree to go?
Maybe it was best if he didn’t, but Angela was so keen on families that it would probably help if he did. Assuming he didn’t blow their cover, of course. Seth wasn’t above bribing him handsomely.
They ate and watched a segment about whether drifting a car around a corner was faster than just slowing down and re-accelerating. It turned out to be a myth that drifting was faster. Seth said, “Guess no one gave Vin Diesel the memo.”
Logan chuckled, wiping his mouth with a paper towel. “To be fair, that’s the only Fast and the Furious movie he’s not in.”
Connor huffed. “He is too. He has a scene at the end.” He shook his head as if Logan was a complete idiot, and it set Seth’s teeth on edge.
But Logan only shrugged. “Yeah, okay.”
Seth supposed Logan had learned to pick his battles, but Connor’s bursts of hostility just seemed so…unnecessary. Seth knew the boy was grieving and hurt, but it was a shame he was dedicated to regarding Logan as the enemy.
After they ate, they drove in tandem to drop Connor off at school, where he slouched away without a wave goodbye, and then to Jenna’s to drop off her SUV. Seth had gotten a bit behind when he was caught at a yellow light, and he was surprised to see Logan waiting for him on the curb. Jenna’s modest house was alight with golden Christmas lights and Santa decorations beyond him.
And if Seth’s gut tightened with a spark of lust as the headlights caught Logan’s tall, muscular frame, that was no big deal. So Logan was hot and looked like a classic bad boy in his leather jacket and combat boots. Nothing wrong with Seth enjoying the view. Yes, Logan was a widower, but looking was harmless.
I’m allowed to be attracted to other men even if I’m not in love with them!
Yet no matter how many times he told himself that, guilt lingered. With Brandon, Seth had assured himself it wasn’t sinful because they’d loved each other. But now Brandon was long gone, and Seth should be able to admire another guy without feeling like he was doing something wrong. It was… Well, it was a work in progress.
Logan climbed into the passenger side. He opened his mouth, but then his rough face creased. “You okay?”
“What? Oh, yes! I’m fine.” Seth’s cheeks flamed hot, and he was glad it was relatively dark in the SUV. “Uh-huh.”
“I gave the keys to Jun. Jenna’s busy getting the kids down, and I don’t feel like talking to her right now.”
“Oh. Sure.” Seth headed down the street. Truthfully, it was getting late, and he didn’t much feel like talking to her either.
“Not that I don’t love my sister. She’s amazing. But sometimes she’s…”
“A little exhausting?”
Logan smirked. “Damn right.” He quickly added, “But she’s the best.”
“Absolutely! She’s been so kind and supportive of me since I moved here.” Seth stopped for a red light, glad the snow had tapered off. “I don’t know what I would have done without her last year after Brandon… After we split.”
“Right.”
Silence fell, and Seth was about to flick on the radio when Logan asked, “It was only a few months after you moved here that you broke up?”
Seth’s fingers tightened on the wheel before he fiddled with the wipers even though the windshield was clear. “Yes. Four months. The renovation had been dragging on, and it was stressful for both of us on top of moving across the country, but it was almost finished. Things hadn’t been great, but I thought the light was at the end of the tunnel. We’d been together so many years.”
He sprayed fluid on the windshield, the wipers thumping across before he turned them off and tried to laugh. “Turns out he’d blasted a hole through the side of the tunnel and made his escape with some guy he met at the gym who’s not even thirty yet.” Seth winced at how bitter he sounded.
“Fuck. That’s brutal.”
“Yeah.” Seth did flip on the radio then, scanning past endless Christmas songs until he found someone talking about global warming. “This okay?”
“Whatever you want.”
The planet’s doom should have been more depressing than his failed relationship with Brandon, but Seth decided it was a tie. It was strange to be with Jenna’s brother driving back to the house—which wasn’t really home the way Seth had dreamed it would be when he’d planned the renovation.
He should have known back then that Brandon had one foot out the door. Brandon had let Seth make all the decisions, like he’d known deep down he wouldn’t be around to live in the final product.
As the people on the radio talked about islands of plastic in the ocean, Seth turned onto the 87, careful of the slush that was accumulating. He peeked at Logan from the corner of his eye. Odd to think that Logan would be staying at the house.
Odder still to think that they’d be posing as loving partners. How were they going to pull it off? He supposed they should come up with a plan, but he stayed silent.
How much PDA do we need to make it look real?
Heat flowed through Seth, very much in a southerly direction. Logan was like his secret young fantasies about Dylan McKay come to life, but minus the nineties hair and sideburns.
Seth swallowed through the pang of hurt as he remembered huddling late at night with his big sister, Christine, the volume down low on their secretly recorded VHS episodes of 90210 after everyone had gone to bed.
Now she won’t even acknowledge I’m alive.
He exhaled sharply, annoyed at himself for thinking about Logan and PDAs and teen fantasies in the first place. This was a deal he and Logan had made, and he had to stay…professional, for lack of a better word. Logan was going to be sleeping in his house. Seth had a responsibility to be a good host.
Does he sleep in underwear or pajamas? Or maybe in nothing at all… And what kind of underwear does he wear? Is he hairy?
No. It was wrong for Seth to be thinking about that, even if it was only in his screwed-up head. He shifted, blowing out a long breath. Yes, Logan was handsome—fine, incredibly gorgeous and sexy—
“You okay?” Logan asked.
“Huh?” Seth said too loudly. “Oh, yeah. Just frustrated about all this plastic in the environment. It’s terrible.”
“Oh. Yeah.”
Seth turned up the volume and put all thoughts of Logan, leather jackets, and especially underwear firmly out of his mind.
Boxer briefs.
Black and clinging to a spectacular rear and meaty thighs. Seth stood frozen atop the two steps down into the sunken great room, gripping the mug of coffee he was bringing Logan.
Logan was sprawled on his belly on the couch at the far end, his left arm stretched out on the chaise, the sheet twisted beneath him and duvet pushed down to his feet. He’d asked about putting on the gas fireplace, and Seth had told him to feel free. Now it was overly warm, condensation glistening on the windows.
“Need to set the maximum temperature so it shuts off and doesn’t get too hot.” Seth realized a second later that he’d said the words aloud. His heart raced as he tried to focus on anything but the lust sizzling through him at the sight of Logan’s half-naked—more like three-quarters—and splayed body.
Jenna was right. Seth was ridiculously pent-up and needed to try dating before he humiliated himself and tented his slacks in front of his guest.
Grunting, Logan pushed himself up. “Huh? What?” He peered around in a daze, his sexy voice sleep-scratchy.
Yep. Hairy chest. Would it feel rough under Seth’s fingers? He tore his gaze back up to Logan’s bleary face. “Sorry! I’m so used to talking to myself I apparently don’t even realize I’m doing it.” He waved a hand around at the fogged windows. “It got too hot, huh? I can set the fireplace so it turns off after it hits a certain temp.” His other hand was still gripping the mug, which he thrust forward. “Coffee? This is black, but I have milk and sugar if you want?”
“Black’s great. Thanks.”
Seth crossed to the couch, concentrating on breathing. He put the mug on the table, afraid he’d spill it on all that exposed skin if he tried to pass it to Logan directly.
Mmm, hair on his legs and arms too.
Standing upright, Seth backed away. What was the matter with him? He encountered attractive men all the time and kept his libido in check. Was it that he’d been alone and celibate so long now that he was cracking under the pressure? Or was it that there was something undeniably intimate about having Logan sleeping under his roof? In his boxer briefs?
As Matt would say: Little bit from column A, little bit from column B.
“I’d better get to work. Have a good day! Make yourself at home. Oh, let me get you some towels.” He spun to escape before Logan could reply and tried not to think of Logan naked and wet in the shower.
He failed badly, but at least he tried.