Chapter 19

Elizabeth hurried to her rooms, her vision clouded by tears she could not hold back. Memories of the halls of Rosings, Lady Catherine’s unrelenting disdain, Mr. Collins hands upon her person, his spittle on her face…it was all so horrible.

But surely Anne would never face such treatment? She was the young mistress of the house and would be afforded a certain measure of respect.

She dried her eyes and dismissed the maid who sat tending the hearth. She wanted nothing more than to be alone in her misery. She loved Anne dearly, but she held a terribly dark foreboding of never seeing the young woman again. It made no sense. Anne had grown up at Rosings, safe from physical harm though under the cutting stares and dismissal of her mother.

But it was not Elizabeth’s choice. It was that of Anne de Bourgh, as it should be. Elizabeth sat before the fire and breathed deeply. Her emotions were as erratic as her stomach these days. Poor Anne must think she had gone mad. Elizabeth would go to her and make her apologies and help her ready for the trip to Rosings.

Mr. Darcy knocked lightly and entered, for he knew his young wife would be distraught at the departure of his cousin. They were like sisters, the two of them, and there was no doubt the pain Elizabeth would suffer as a carriage from Pemberley carried Anne away.

Elizabeth rushed into his arms, delighted for the comfort of his broad chest. William enveloped her within the circle of his strong arms and Elizabeth sighed with longing. They had come to know a deep abiding love.

Mr. Darcy held a fond fascination for releasing her hair from its pins each night and Elizabeth had become addicted to his gentle touch. He sat her upon the bed and began his ritual. He was slow and methodical and he spoke to her of his heart’s journey to hers.

“I did not plan to love you my dearest Elizabeth. I found your conversation and amiable company to be refreshing in Hertfordshire, though our first meeting was marred by my horrid insult. I did not think of us as man and wife until I returned home to find my mother drawn from the precipice by your mere presence. What she saw that day was the same I’d seen many times before. A light, a beauty with wit and charm but also with love and mercy in her heart. I still wonder how I came to be the fortunate man whose lake you tumbled into at just the right moment.”

Elizabeth closed her eyes and sighed as the molten thrill of his touch spread through her limbs. The delicious knowledge of her incursion into his heart elevated her mood and she turned, pulling his head down until his lips met her own.

She whispered the words she longed to hide from him. The words, once spoken, would change their lives forever. She wanted to be the first to see the moment of realization in his eyes, the speechless way his lips would move, the tears of joy, and the sublime happiness they would share when she told him of their coming child.

Instead, he bolted upright, his face a changing mask of surprise, worry, confusion, and sadness. Elizabeth followed him as he went to stand by the window, his arms crossed before him as he struggled with his pain.

“I watched mother lose a child between myself and Georgie. I thought we might lose her as well. I cannot have the same fate befall you, Elizabeth.”

She stood quietly behind him and placed a small hand upon his taut shoulder and rubbed gentle circles. “William, I shall not lose this child. I will go to London if it pleases you. I am young and healthy. Do not borrow trouble for us, please, I beg you. Our child shall come safely into this world. Tis the first duty of a mother.”

He turned then, blinking hard against the tears gathered and held Elizabeth tightly. She was his dream come true. A woman strong yet soft enough to hold him, a woman with the sense and wit to make him see reality while taking the sting from it.

He took her gently to the bed and sat with her, his hand upon the small mound that held their child. There could never have been a greater present for Fitzwilliam Darcy and he leaned closer, his eyes lost in hers and kissed his wife tenderly, tentatively, all questions falling away as she pulled him closer.

A light knock upon her door and Elizabeth sighed. She took her husband’s face in hand and whispered sweet promises for when they met again later in this room. She left him and went to the door. Anne was standing in the hallway.

Elizabeth quietly closed the door behind her and gathered her hair in her hands, self-conscious for a moment before mumbling something about a nap.

Anne brightened as she saw the dark mass of curls escape her friend’s hands and frame her face. “Why Lizzy, you seem positively radiant. Is there a babe for my cousin?”

Elizabeth tried to conceal the truth but her mirth gave her away. “You must not tell your aunt. I am afraid for her to know so soon. Promise?”

Anne swore her pledge to keep the secret and begged her friend to understand why she must go to Rosings. “Lizzy, I know my plans are not the ones you would have for me. But I promise, I shall write to you every day, especially now,” she said as she noticed Elizabeth’s middle, “I would not have you worried while you carry our newest family member.”

Elizabeth took Anne’s hand and held it warmly in her own. “There is little doubt I would prefer your presence at Pemberley, we have grown so close these months. But,” here Elizabeth became quite serious, “you must choose the path to follow and I must see you down that path. I was wrong to run away and cause you a moment’s worry. But yes, you must write to us. Never think you are without my help.”

Anne hugged Elizabeth tightly and kissed her cheek. “I promise. And I shall be back before the babe is born.”

She took Elizabeth’s hand and led her back down the hall to her own rooms. “You must see the evidence of my vow.”

Anne opened the door and smiled brightly as Elizabeth entered. The wedding dress awaited the bride’s return.

Elizabeth and Anne linked arms before leaving the room to walk the long hallway past Lady Anne’s sitting room. Anne halted and glanced through the open door. Her aunt was reading by the fireplace and so she and Elizabeth continued on their way.

“Shall we walk in the gardens, Lizzy? I believe a good turn about the grounds would serve us well after such a trying morning.”

Elizabeth nodded, her eyes bright from too many tears. “Yes, we must. And we can talk of your wedding.”

Anne smiled, a confident, happy smile that Elizabeth cherished upon her pale features. She furrowed a brow worried her friend might lose all she had gained whilst at Pemberley, but she refused to begin the discussion again. It was pain enough to think of Anne locked away at Rosings.

Once past the front doors, the two ladies slowed their pace and turned away from the lake much to Elizabeth’s satisfaction. She still would not set foot near its treacherous banks.

“I do hope mother is only feeling poorly and my visit might cheer her. As much as she is wrongheaded and stubborn, I do so love her.”

Elizabeth bit her tongue to keep the words of anger for Lady Catherine locked away, for she loved Anne and would not hurt her for all the world. She forced a smile and turned, confiding in her friend. “There is no greater tonic than the love of family, although lately, I have had quite enough.”

Anne laughed aloud and patted Elizabeth’s hand. “At times, there is as much rejoicing at their departure as at their arrival!”

“All save one,” Elizabeth replied, casting her eyes to the ground before them. She would never be happy to see Anne leave her side.

Anne pulled her along the garden paths, eager to dispel thoughts of their parting. “Do you think the wedding should be held near Georgiana’s garden? I would dearly love to feel her near to me as I pledge my love to Henry.”

Elizabeth brightened at Anne’s thoughtfulness. “I can only imagine such a gesture would please Lady Anne greatly. It is right we should recall Georgiana often and with much fondness, especially during a wedding.”

The two young women continued their walk, planning just where the wedding would be held. Elizabeth knew Lady Anne would keep her mind busy with the preparations. The time without Anne by her side promised to pass quickly.