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RUCKER AND RIDGEWAY had found themselves in a padded room, the roof of which had immediately closed up after they had fallen in. They had yelled themselves hoarse and tried their communication devices and cell phones to no avail. Their padded cell seemed soundproof, but every once in a while they could hear muffled bangs. The small room was a quarter the size of what they remembered the living room to be, and since it was padded, it was not uncomfortable. Rucker tried using his knife to cut through the padding and climb up to the top, but only succeeded in cutting through the soft material and sliding down a la Douglas Fairbanks cutting his way heroically down a sail in that black and white pirate movie of old. Loud snickering was heard from Ridgeway, who used his phone in flashlight mode to assist Spiderman as he crashed, cursing, to the floor. Rucker had tried shooting at the trap door as soon as they hit the floor, only to be greeted by a ricocheting bullet that whizzed past his head. Ridgeway told Rucker to put his fucking gun away or he would find a new holster for it. Ridgeway noticed that every time an explosion was felt, slight cracks appeared in the trap door.
“Look, Rucker, that last blast puts some large cracks in the trap-door. If you boost me up, maybe I can force the fucker open.”
Rucker, who was glad to finally be able to do something, braced himself against a wall and boosted Ridgeway onto his shoulders. Just as Ridgeway balanced himself on Rucker’s shoulders, a China cabinet crashed through the trap door and into the cell, flinging plates, cups, and saucers everywhere.
Rucker saw that a perfect stairway had just formed. He walked over to the cabinet and climbed out of the cell and into the dining room. Ridgeway was several seconds behind Rucker, still picking bits of a Waterford dinner plate out of his arm when he caught up with Rucker in the dining room doorway. Cautiously peering out, Rucker must have seen that the coast was clear for he suddenly sprinted out of the room. Ridgeway checked the area as well and left the dining room. He found cover behind a dishwasher someone had pulled out and used before him as cover judging from the new ventilation holes in the sides. Ridgeway scanned the area and did not see anyone. He thought could hear something faint, but given he was near to the hole in the kitchen wall, he wasn’t sure what he was hearing. God knows what lived out there in the desert and what kinds of sounds they made. Ridgeway shivered inwardly, recalling that that thing might still be out there, and he didn’t want to see that ever again.
Rucker waved to Ridgeway indicating the coast was clear. He ran to a spot around the corner from Rucker’s position.
“Where is everyone? Ridgeway said under his breath.
“I don’t know. Maybe we missed the whole show.”
“All I know is, I get paid whether or not we shoot at or hit anyone. I was present and accounted for and ended up in a padded cell with someone who doesn’t know the meaning of hold it in.”
“Listen, I didn’t exactly end up with a perfectly mannered supermodel as a cellmate either. Hey, what was that?”
“What was what?” Ridgeway asked. “This whole house could collapse at any moment. You’re probably heard a wall giving way.” He cocked his head like a confused puppy, a large blockheaded puppy, squinted, and asked, “What, was that? It sounded like someone calling for help from the other room.”
“Hey, maybe there are a few party favors left after all,” Rucker said with a nasty grin as he took his weapon out of his shoulder holster and motioned Ridgeway to follow.
Rucker and Ridgeway cautiously followed the sound and found themselves in the family room. As they clung to the far wall and scanned the room, they saw furniture overturned and a strange bulge in the center of the floor. The shouting seemed to emanate from this area. Rucker motioned for Ridgeway to check out the anomaly in the middle of the room, but Ridgeway shook his head violently and motioned Rucker to go over to the bulging floor and he would cover him. The head shaking turned into a shoving match, which then escalated into a “fuck you” and “you’re a pussy” shouting match.
A muffled but clear, “Hey, fuckers, it’s us,” came in unison from the floor, stopping an all-out brawl between the two highly trained hired guns.
Rucker and Ridgeway paused in mid-punch and stared at the talking floor.
“Allred and Mims, is that you?” asked Rucker.
“No, it’s your mother, you ass. Get us out of here!” shouted Allred.
Rucker and Ridgeway were able to pry the trap door the rest of the way open with their hands and threw down part of a sectional sofa for Allred and Mims to use as a makeshift ladder.
“We just pulled ourselves out of our hole. Those assholes are going to pay,” Rucker told Mims as he helped him out of the trap. “They ambushed us in the other room. We were evaluating the situation and trying to count heads. The next thing we knew, we were in a fucking hole. How about you?”
Mims paused a moment. “I came in through the front and Allred came in through the hole in the kitchen at the same time to get the drop on them, but somehow they knew we were coming. Those IT guys were supposed to jam any video surveillance. Anyway, those nerdy looking guys were pointing their weapons at us, along with some weird looking thing. It looked like something out of a Star Wars movie or something. So, I figure, those guys are nerds, right? They don’t have the stones to fire a gun let alone at a person. Maybe shoot one of those surveillance bugs, but not a person, right? I figure I shoot at one of the nerds and get everyone’s attention, and we can just wrap this thing up. I shoot, and the next thing I know, one of the nerds aims that weird Star Wars looking rifle at me and fired off a round. The thing parts my hair, takes out a window, and a golf cart on the patio. Allred and I decided to move to another room. Unfortunately, it was the room with the hole in the floor and, bam! In we go. Well, enough story time, let’s get these fuckers.”
“Is that how it went down?” Ridgeway asked Allred after he filled him in on what they knew, which was next to nothing.
Allred did a wiggle-waggle motion with one hand and said, “Close enough.” He remembered putting their hands up when they saw they were outnumbered, and then Mims fired a round through the ceiling when he raised his hands. The one nerdy guy thought Mims was shooting at them and let loose with the weird gun. Next thing they knew they were in a pit, and somehow a group of pencil pushers and lab rats got the best of them. Oh yes, these people were going to pay.
Rucker found the trigger for the trap door while Mims was telling his somewhat fictionalized story. Rucker thought the trap door device was impressive and was trying to rationalize having one put in his condo.
“Stop fucking around, Rucker, and let’s check out the rest of the house,” Ridgeway barked out over his shoulder as he Mims, and Allred fanned out of the family room and into the kitchen area.
Just as Mims, Allred, Ridgeway and a reluctant Rucker exited the family room, they ran into a surprised group of people coming out of the laundry room door.
“No, wait. There are people out...” Melissa cried as she looked at her smartphone and saw the group at the same time her friends encountered them in person.
“Well, hello there, assholes. I bet you didn’t think you would see us again,” Mims said to the remaining six as he and his associates began firing.
Melissa reacted first but was last out of the laundry room. She had five people in front of her, and didn’t have a clear shot of the hired guns. Melissa grabbed Humberto, who was directly in front of her redirected him back into the laundry room, and told him to head back into the garage. Humberto’s mind was more than willing to comply with Melissa, but his legs and feet were slightly slower, and it seemed an eternity before he spun around and grabbed Cathy on the way.
Maggie and Danny were first out of the door and were directly in front of Mims and friends when the shooting started. Maggie had her assault rifle slung around her shoulders, and when she saw the cluster of mercenaries in front of them, she raised the weapon and pointed it in the general direction of the group in front of her. But Danny grabbed Maggie and pulled her away from the gunfire, causing her shots to go wild, but scattering the hired guns nevertheless. Kevin dropped to the ground and fired off a round from what looked like a rifle put together in his grandpa’s garage. What came out, however, was a different story. A small rocket shot out, parting the group that had already scattered thanks to Maggie’s wild shots. The missile demolished what was left of the kitchen wall and continued out into the desert, whistling as it went.
“What the fuck was that?!” Rucker shouted as he dove for cover in the family room. While there an idea begins to slowly form in his head. Truth be told, every idea Rucker had developed this way and either died quickly without him realizing it or materialized long after everyone else had thought of the same thing and were about five steps ahead of him. This time, however, his idea actually grew to fruition. Rucker pumped the air in excitement, but quickly lowered his fist in case anyone walked past the door and saw him punching the air. Rucker peered around the door and found Ridgeway lurking in the hallway by the master bedroom. He waved him over and gave Ridgeway the all-clear sign. Ridgeway looked around and saw it was safe to head to the family room as everyone seemed to have found cover in the house. Ridgeway crept into the family room, slid the pocket doors nearly shut, and then Rucker filled him in on his plan.