When she met with the khashims two days later, who were almost drunk with their victory, Kevla learned that the casualties on the Emperor’s side had been high, as high as perhaps ten or twelve thousand. Many of the dead, and some of the living from the Emperor’s army, had been Arukani who had been captured in raids and forced to fight. Their return to their families had been moving to behold, they told Kevla.
“I have no doubt,” she said. She hesitated, then told them, “The Dragon and I must leave you.”
“When?” demanded Terku.
“Tomorrow.”
“But we need you!” cried another khashim. She looked at her father and saw that his face was impassive, but his eyes sad. “We could not stand against the army without you. If the Emperor attacks again—”
“He won’t,” Kevla said with certainty. “He knows that I am here now, and I’m the one he’s after. You have learned how to work together. You stood side by side, clan by clan, to defeat a common foe. If you continue to rely on one another, there is nothing you will be unable to do.”
She smiled, sadly. “That was Jashemi’s dream, and that of at least one khashim here. You will be all right without us.” Before they could protest further, she stood. “Gather the clans. I would speak to them before I leave.”
It took a while, but at last everyone who had come to Mount Bari to stand against the Emperor was present. Kevla had insisted that everyone come, women and children as well as men of all castes. Standing beside her friend the Dragon, she looked out over the sea of upturned faces and was moved by what she saw.
“You have dared so much,” Kevla told them. “You have not shirked your duty, and you have paid a painful price for your continued freedom. You have accepted that there are things you did not know before, and have grown to look upon the Lorekeepers as true bearers of wisdom, not as madmen and women. You listened to me, a woman, and followed my counsel. You have learned that the Dragon is very real, and has a kinder heart than some of the laws you attribute to him would indicate.
“All of these things speak to the quality of the people you are. Arukani are passionate and proud. We will not be dominated by the will of outsiders. We will tend to our own, and when we see injuries and injustices, we will heal them. The Great Dragon helped us see the path, and now you have chosen to walk it. You don’t need us anymore.
“But there is one thing you need,” she continued. “One thing you must reconcile.”
She nodded to the Dragon. He raised his head, closed his eyes, and uttered a long, crooning call. Even though Kevla knew what to expect, the hairs on her arms lifted at the sound.
“It is time for you all to understand the beings that you have called…the kulis.”
A cry went up. Exhausted and injured as they were, they were not beyond fear. Kevla hoped they would give their eyes time to see, to comprehend, before they acted. She knew she was taking a great risk, but after all she had witnessed over the last several days, she believed her people could be trusted to do the right thing.
They came forth from their hiding places in the mountain. Some of them limped, their legs twisted or missing altogether. Some held withered arms close to their chests. Some had faces that were beautiful and whole; some had faces that were twisted and deformed. Some had eyes that stared vacantly into nothingness. They carried their smaller brethren; their clothing was nothing but scraps of cloth left behind on altars scattered throughout Arukan. They winced in the daylight, denizens of darkness that they were, but they came when their friend the Dragon called. The Dragon, who had taken care of the very first kulis, who had fed them and taught them to speak and care for one another.
The murmurings fell silent as the Arukani, after centuries, finally beheld the kulis who had so frightened them. The kulis in return stared back, their eyes round with terror. Some of them looked as though they were about to flee, to return to the safety of the mountain caves.
“Do you see?” Kevla cried. “Look not with the eyes of fear, but the eyes of understanding…of compassion!”
On the stones of the foothills of Mount Bari, wrapped in pathetic clothing, lean and pale and haggard looking, stood the abandoned children of Arukan.
Kevla went to one of them and took her hand. The girl, about eight years old, looked up trustingly at the Flame Dancer as their fingers entwined. Kevla stroked her hair.
“For thousands of years, we thought the Dragon wanted us to expose any child born with a withered arm, or without sight or speech, or…”
She gently touched a large red patch on the child’s sweet face.
“Or the so-called blood mark. We left them on the altars, and the older ones, the ones abandoned a generation before, and a generation before that, came to take care of them. They ate the food we left for the Dragon, made clothing from the fabric used to wrap that food. And they huddled in the darkness, afraid. As afraid of the Arukani as we were of our created demons.”
Still holding the girl’s hand, she walked to where Tahmu-kha-Rakyn stood. His eyes were wide and shone with unshed tears.
“For five thousand years,” Kevla said, her voice trembling, “the Arukani people have been afraid of their own children.”
Tahmu stared at the girl, who looked back shyly at him. Slowly, the khashim of the Clan of Four Waters knelt and opened his arms to the daughter he had left lying on the Clan’s altar eight years ago.
The girl hesitated, looking up at Kevla.
“Go on, my sister,” said Kevla. She looked at Tahmu and smiled. “It’s all right. He will take good care of you.”
The girl moved forward into her father’s embrace, wrapping her arms around him as he folded her close and buried his face in her small, slim neck.
Kevla put her hand to her mouth, fearful of sobbing out loud with joy. She turned to see what the others were doing, and despite her efforts, the tears slipped freely down her face.
One by one, the men and women of Arukan were stepping forward hesitantly, trying to seek out their own lost children, looking first for the distinguishing mark or deformity and then holding on to the whole child. She watched as some continued to search in vain, and pity welled up inside her. For these parents, reconciliation had come too late. Not all the kulis survived.
Some of the children hung back, clinging to the older ones and to the Dragon, but Kevla knew in her heart that with time, there would be no more kulis. No mother had willingly surrendered the infant suckling at her breast; no father had wanted to place a baby at the foot of a mountain to die. This was a second chance, for all of them.
She did not know how long she stood, watching the reunions and feeling deeply content. A touch on her arm roused her from her reverie, and she turned to see Sahlik.
With a cry of delight, Kevla flung her arms around the old woman. “Sahlik…I am so happy to see you!”
“And I you, child. And I you.”
They drew apart and regarded one another with moist eyes. A cough behind them caused them to look up. Tahmu stood there, holding his daughter’s hand.
“There is much I would say to you both,” he said. “Sahlik…I should have listened to you. You spoke wisdom, and I was too caught up in my own pride to hear it. Much has happened since you took your fifth score.”
“I know, my lord,” Sahlik said, softening. “I have heard what happened to the khashimu…and the khashima.”
Tahmu reached to stroke his daughter’s hair as he continued. “Jashemi and Kevla benefited greatly from your presence in their lives. I…I would that this little one know you, too. Would you consider returning to the House of Four Waters?”
Sahlik’s answer was quick and heartfelt. “Of course, my lord.” She smiled slightly. “I have missed the caverns.” She looked from Kevla to Tahmu and pursed her lips shrewdly. “Let me take—do you have a name, child?”
The girl shook her head shyly.
“I will name her Meli,” Tahmu said, “if she likes it.” Kevla’s throat closed up. The word meant “gift.” “Does that please you?” he asked the girl.
“Yes,” Meli said in a whisper. She spoke with a strange accent; while the Dragon had taught the kulis to speak Arukani, all of them had their own way of uttering the words that made them unique.
“Come then, Meli,” said Sahlik, “and I will tell you all about life at the House of Four Waters.”
Kevla watched them go, smiling. Her father touched her arm. “Walk with me,” he said.
Kevla knew she needed to go, but she couldn’t tear herself away just yet. She walked and talked with her father for a long time. He told her stories of Jashemi she had never heard, some moving, some amusing, and when he had finished Kevla felt more connected to the man who had been her brother.
He spoke also of her mother, and Kevla listened hungrily as he described a woman of passion, beauty, and intelligence. He explained his reasons for marrying Yeshi in Keishla’s stead, and even as he spoke them she realized he thought them foolish.
Hesitantly Kevla asked, “Where is she? Yeshi?”
“I banished her,” Tahmu said. “I couldn’t bring myself to order her death. And now, I am glad I didn’t. That is one less thing to blame myself for.” He frowned. “Though there are so many others.”
Kevla chewed on her lip, weighing her words. “Have you seen my mother since the day you took me with you to the House?”
Sorrow settled over his fine features. “No,” he said. “I thought it best not to. I tried to be a good husband to Yeshi.”
She slipped an arm through his as they sat next to each other and laid her head on his shoulder. As they regarded the stars just beginning to appear in the sky, she said, “The world has changed, Father. You have changed with it. Would you want to see Keishla again?”
He closed his eyes. “Yes, I would.”
“Then find her.”
He looked at her with unspeakable sadness. “It’s too late for that,” he said heavily. “Far too late. Too late for so many things.”
His eyes fell upon Meli. Sahlik was teaching her how to play Shamizan. Kevla’s own heart ached at the sight.
You like the game, then?
Oh, yes, very much.
I am so glad. I hoped you would.
Her mind returned to the present as Tahmu continued. “I did not have the courage to claim you before, though now I do so with a pride you cannot imagine. I hid you in my house, and I let Yeshi dictate your future. I let you be abused and beaten. When you used your powers to save my life, I ordained your death. I have no excuse but that I thought I was obeying the laws of my people.”
“Great lord, there is no need—”
But Tahmu continued. “A caste system that elevates some and condemns more, that exiles its own children, that walks with hushed step and head bowed in shame does not serve Arukan. It serves Arukan’s enemies. I have seen the future in the eyes of my three children. One of them, I will never see again, and the pain of that—”
His flowing speech came to an abrupt halt as he bit his lip. In a rough voice, he continued.
“The pain of that can only be equaled by the joy I take in having my two daughters returned to me. If you will, if I have not made you ashamed to own me as your father, Kevla Bai-sha will henceforth be known as Kevla-sha-Tahmu, the beautiful daughter of a very proud father.”
Kevla was shocked. Mixed emotions flooded her. Evading the question, she replied, “I cannot stay. I want to. I want to get to know you, to know my little sister. But I have to leave. Arukan may have been able to stand against the Emperor, but the world is still in jeopardy. I must leave and find the other Dancers.”
He sighed, and she knew he had understood her unspoken refusal. “I feared you would say that.” He continued watching Meli play with Sahlik. “There’s my chance for redemption, Kevla. Sweet and innocent and perfect. I sacrificed her to the Great Dragon, and beyond all hope, he has given her back to me. I used to believe that the Dragon had cursed me, but now I know it was only my own folly.” His voice trembled slightly. “I no longer believe in curses, but by all that is good in this world, I believe in blessings.”
Kevla was deeply moved. She regarded her father steadily, taking in the strong features that so reminded her of Jashemi.
She squeezed his arm and he turned to look at her. “Tahmu-kha-Rakyn,” she said evenly, “I will take your name.”
Slowly, his lips curved in a smile. “It was Jashemi’s name,” he said.
“May his name forever be spoken,” Kevla said, as she leaned over and kissed her father’s cheek.
The dawn was crisp and bright, a good omen. The clans were preparing for departure, breaking down the encampments. She had assisted them in a solemn duty before she had slept that night; lighting the funeral pyres for the honored dead. There had not been as many as she had feared, but enough so that the task was heartbreaking.
She was walking toward the Dragon, carrying a small bundle of provisions Sahlik had packed for her, when a woman approached her and said, “Kevla-sha-Tahmu?”
The name still sounded so strange, but also very sweet. Kevla turned to see who had addressed her and saw tears in the woman’s eyes.
“My name is Shali-sha-Terku.” Kevla hoped her face did not register the sudden shock she felt. This was Jashemi’s wife, the one he said he did not love, who deserved better.
She found her voice. “I know your name,” Kevla said. “You are…you are my brother’s widow.”
Shali nodded and placed one hand on her belly. She seemed to be a naturally thin woman, yet her stomach was starting to grow round—
“Can you tell me how he died?”
Guilt weighed Kevla down. To confess to this woman that she had lain with her husband, Kevla’s own kin, would heal nothing and harm much. And though she had once burned with jealousy for Shali, now that she saw the woman and her pain, the only feeling Kevla had for her sister-in-law was compassion. Yet she could not lie. Gently, Kevla took Shali’s hand in her own.
“Jashemi was my Lorekeeper, though neither of us knew it for too long,” she said. “He helped me to discover who I truly am. In so doing, I lost control of my powers and…I killed him.”
It still hurt her so badly she had difficulty breathing. Shali’s hands tightened painfully on hers, squeezing so hard that Kevla wondered if the bones would break.
“You…?”
Kevla nodded. She kept her eyes glued to Shali’s. “I have known no greater pain in this life than having to live with this. I didn’t want to live with it. But I have to, because Arukan needed me. Other people elsewhere need me, need the Dancers, or else we are all doomed.”
“I should hate you,” Shali whispered. “You killed my husband, the father of my baby. But I don’t. I see your suffering. To have bought your power at such a cost—I do not envy you, Kevla-sha-Tahmu, no matter that you ride the Great Dragon.”
Kevla smiled sadly. “Then you are wise indeed, Shali-sha-Terku. The basest beggar on the streets is happier than I.”
“Did…did Jashemi speak of me?”
“He did,” Kevla said. “He said you deserved better than him.”
Shali laughed, though she was starting to cry. “Then Jashemi-kha-Tahmu was a liar. I could have had no better man for my husband in this world.”
Shali began to weep in earnest. Her heart breaking for the girl, for both of them, Kevla took her in her arms and hugged her gently. Shali was smaller than she, and Kevla felt the wetness of tears on her shoulder.
“Be easy, sister,” Kevla said. “I will tell you this and you may know that it is true: His body is gone, but his soul is free. He would want you to be happy, to raise your child in love and peace.”
Your child. Any chance that Kevla had conceived during their single union had been shattered that same night. The fire that had claimed Jashemi had surely also destroyed any seed he might have planted in her womb. If there were to be any heritage from Jashemi, it would come from this woman.
“That is a comfort,” said Shali, pulling back and wiping her wet face. “To know that his soul is free.”
I’m glad you find it so, Kevla thought. If only I could take comfort in it.
“Will you return? To see your niece or nephew?”
“I hope to, but I cannot tell,” Kevla said. She bent and kissed Shali on the forehead. “Stay well, my sister. Blessings on the child you carry.”
Slowly Kevla walked to where the Dragon waited for her. He looked at her with compassionate eyes and lowered himself to facilitate her climbing atop his back.
Kevla looked around and despite her pain smiled at what she saw. Everywhere, the former kulis had found parents or siblings or even strangers to welcome them. Women mixed freely with the men. On the hard-packed, yellow earth were colorful veils some of the women had discarded. Others kept their veils.
Good, Kevla thought. A woman should be the one who gets to choose to reveal her face or not. At least there is no Great Dragon dictating to her.
Time would tell if this would last. Old habits were hard to break, and it might take a while before some of the older clansmen learned to accept former demons as children, wives as true partners, and the lower-born among them as equals.
But it was a good start.
“Are you ready, my dear?” said the Dragon, craning his neck to look at her with infinite affection.
She nodded. “I am ready,” she said.
Her people cheered her as she rose into the sky, waving goodbye. Kevla saw her father holding Meli’s hand in his own large, strong one. He placed his other hand on his heart as their eyes met. And she saw Sahlik, and Shali, rubbing the round belly that was filled with Jashemi’s son or daughter.
They would be all right without her. Life would go on here. It was up to her and the other Dancers she was setting out to find to ensure that life went on everywhere in this and other worlds.
She lifted her gaze from the rapidly dwindling images of her people and fixed her eyes on the horizon, her heart lifting with every beat of the Dragon’s powerful wings.