23

 

Ellie’s eyes fluttered open for a moment then she squeezed them closed. She remembered the coldness of the snow, the way it stung her skin, the way it bit at her face. She slowly opened her eyes again, allowing her vision to adjust to the brightness. She tried to focus and get her bearings, but the pain was excruciating. Each breath brought a crushing feeling to her chest. She tried to swallow but her throat was painfully dry. She tried to cry out for help but the only sound she could make was a breathless moan.

“Don’t try to talk,” Jesse said. He was there beside her, his beautiful face slowly coming into focus.

Suddenly everything was coming into focus, and she knew where she was. She wasn’t in the freezing snow fighting for her life anymore; she was alive and safe in a warm hospital bed. Tears rolled from the corner of her eyes, stinging her face as they pooled in the cuts and scratches.

“You had me worried,” Jesse said as he gently dabbed a soft tissue at her tears.

“Jesse….” Her voice was crackly and shallow.

“You’re at Avery County Memorial Hospital.” He pressed the nurse call button then continued softly wiping away Ellie’s tears.

The last thing she remembered was Jerome Kenton standing over her and then…it all came back to her. She tried to lift her left arm and felt the heaviness of the cast.

“They had to put a pin in your wrist. They just operated yesterday so it’s probably goin’ to hurt pretty bad today.”

“Yesterday?” Her throat felt like she had swallowed a pail of sand. She swallowed hard, trying desperately to wet her throat. “What day is it?”

“You’ve been here three days, baby.”

A nurse padded into the room and stopped beside the bed. “Well, good morning, Miss Saunders. It’s good to finally see you awake.” She smiled then did a quick scan of the various monitors. “I’m Ruby, and I’ll be your nurse today. How’s your pain?”

“Hurts,” Ellie whispered.

Ruby nodded then checked the IV bag. “You took quite a beating. But I want to hold off just a little bit on the morphine and see if we can’t get you a little more awake, OK?”

“Can you give her something maybe not as strong?” Jesse asked.

Ruby winked at him. “We’re not going to let her hurt too long. Think you could handle some ice chips?”

Ellie nodded. Anything to take away the tightness in her throat. Ruby left and returned a moment later with a small cup of ice chips. She handed the cup to Jesse. “Start slow. Give her just a little bit at a time.” She raised the head of the bed to a forty-five degree angle. Ellie grimaced at the movement of the incline. “I know it hurts, but I want you to sit up for a little while. I’ll let the doctor know you’re awake, and he’ll probably be in shortly. Call me if she needs anything,” she said to Jesse before she left.

Jesse gently placed the spoon in Ellie’s mouth. The ice was cold and burned sliding down but felt good to her parched throat. She took another small bite then slightly turned her head away from the spoon.

He set the cup on the table then pulled a chair up beside the bed. He looked as if he hadn’t shaved in a week, his hair a mess of tangled waves. His clothes were wrinkled and loose fitting and Ellie wondered how long it had been since he had been home. Had he been there the whole time? Had he been there since…?

“Brady?” she asked, the moisture slowly coming back to her voice.

Jesse nodded. “He’s down the hall. The shot really wasn’t that bad. He’s on blood thinners. That’s why he bled so bad. I think they’re going to release him tomorrow.”

Ellie closed her eyes and slightly nodded, then silently thanked God for his grace and mercy.

“He said you blew up Kenton’s truck to signal for help.”

Ellie slowly ran her tongue over her lips and nodded. “There was no radio. No signal on the cell phones. I had to do something.”

Jesse smiled. “Well, it worked. The mailman heard the explosion and saw the flames and called it in. The paramedics said if it had been another ten minutes, Brady would have bled out. We’d be going to a funeral instead of a retirement party.”

Funeral…oh, no.

“Peggy’s funeral….”

Jesse slightly nodded then grinned. “Aunt Sissy said you’d do anything to get out of going.”

“Daddy—”

“They’ll be here after lunch.”

Ellie took a painful breath and asked about Landon.

“Deveraux released him yesterday. Leon went home with them, to help them get settled.”

“Leon?”

Jesse chuckled. “Apparently, he and Ashley hit it off, and the next thing we know, Leon’s taking a day of vacation and going home with them.”

Ellie cracked a smile then the smile, although painful, led to a giggle. “Leon?”

“Yeah, I know. Stranger things have happened, I suppose.”

“Poor Ashley.”

“See what happens when you’re not around to micro-manage everything? Poor unsuspecting Ashley falls for Leon. I told you, you should have let me go with you.”

Ellie smiled, reluctantly admitting to herself this was one time she wished she had listened to him.

Jesse’s expression suddenly turned solemn. He said quietly, “They found Becky’s body.”

It didn’t surprise her. “In the woods behind the house,” she whispered.

Jesse nodded. “How’d you know?”

“The first day we went out there, there were footprints in the snow leading to the woods. There were drag marks beside them.” Her heart ached for Becky Kenton and the hell on earth she lived through. Maybe God would forgive her for her part in Landon’s abduction, and she’d be able to live a peaceful life in Heaven.

“Kenton?” Ellie asked in a small voice.

Jesse looked at her for a long moment then slowly shook his head. “You hit him dead center.”

 

****

 

Ellie looked out her living room window, and, through the approaching dusk, gazed at the daffodils poking their heads up through the soft ground along the walkway. She admired their resilience. Year after year, they came back. Sometimes blooming underneath a heavy snow or an early spring cold spell. They never gave up or gave in to what seemed like unbeatable odds. She wondered if God was that way. Never giving up on troubled souls, waiting patiently for them to come around and reach their full bloom.

She went into the bathroom and pulled out her newly bought items of makeup. She opened the women’s magazine she’d bought at the grocery store to the how-to page and propped it on the back of the toilet. Moisturizer, check. Concealer, check. Foundation, check. Green eye-shadow (to make her eyes pop), eyeliner, mascara, an eyelash curler, check, check, check. Lip-liner, lipstick, cream blush, and finishing powder, check, check, check, and check. She stared at the assortment of makeup, wondering if each piece was really necessary to achieve the light and natural new look for spring the magazine boasted. Maybe she should have allowed more time to do this? Jesse was picking her up in about half an hour.

She read the instructions on the small tube of moisturizer then applied a dab on her cheeks, under her eyes and on her forehead. Next came the concealer, guaranteed to hide imperfections and flaws. It looked like a tube of yellow lipstick. Was it really that easy? She’d been hiding her imperfections and flaws for years. Or maybe hiding behind them was a better choice of words. For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God… He still loves me despite all my flaws. She put away the concealer and foundation, the lip liner and that odd-looking lash curler. Keep it simple, stupid, she told herself, then applied a thin dusting of eye shadow and a small amount of eyeliner. She accidentally poked herself in the eye with the mascara brush. “Ouch,” she cried, using a tissue to dab away the tears. She wondered if women who carried mascara in their purses should be required to have a concealed weapon permit.

She put away her collection of makeup then glanced at herself in the mirror. The bruises on her face had faded, and all that remained was a slight scar under her bottom lip. If you didn’t know it was there, you wouldn’t even see it. But Ellie knew it was there. It would always be there. But it wasn’t a bad thing—it was a reminder of a mother who found her son, and a little boy’s miracle that saved Ellie from herself.

She went into the bedroom and looked at herself in the pedestal mirror. She was wearing a lightweight sweater and jeans. Jesse had told her to dress casual, to wear jeans, but she wasn’t so sure about this wearing jeans to church thing. It had been so long since she had set foot in a church, she wasn’t sure of the protocol. Why she ever agreed to go with him she’d never know. But like those stupid little daffodils, he was nothing if not persistent.

It was CrossPoint Baptist Church’s spring revival, and she guessed there’d be no harm in going with him to one service. Besides, she liked the name—CrossPoint. She wondered if its members were all at a cross point in their lives, too?

She heard a knock on the door then Jesse’s familiar voice. “Hey, sweetcakes, you ready?”

She took one last look at the mirror, took a deep breath then joined him in the living room. He was wearing faded jeans and a long sleeve t-shirt with a CrossPoint emblem on the chest. Ellie liked the logo, a compass with a cross in the center, indicating a new direction. A new direction suited her just fine.

“Wow,” he said, smiling softly. “You look great.”

“And you’re sure about the jeans?”

“Have I ever led you astray? OK, don’t answer that.” He laughed as he closed the door behind them.

Ellie buckled her seat belt then asked, “Who’s preaching tonight?” Like she would really recognize the name of any preacher!

“Just a visiting preacher. I hear he’s pretty good. Brittany’s going to be there. She’s really looking forward to meeting you.”

“When does she leave for her mission trip?”

“Three weeks. She’s two-hundred dollars short, so hopefully she’ll get it in the love offering.”

Love offerings, mission trips, spring revivals…it was all so foreign to her, yet so familiar. Even despite a bad case of nerves, she was comfortable with it.

“You ready to come back to work Monday?”

She chuckled. “Are you kidding? I’m so bored I thought about taking up knitting.”

“Hey, my mother’s a knitter. Don’t knock it,” he said and laughed.

“Has she ever knitted you anything?”

“Best pair of socks I’ve ever had. They don’t fit at all, but they make wonderful pot holders.”

Ellie laughed. “Does she know you use them for pot holders?”

Jesse shook his head. “And she’ll never find out, will she?”

“Your secret’s safe.” She grinned. She wondered if she’d ever meet Jesse’s mother? She wondered about this whole relationship…what made him appear that day at Caper’s? Why’d he take such an interest in the case she was working?

They’d been almost inseparable since that day he’d eaten all her chips, but the only time they had spoken about their one night together, Jesse had said he wished it had never happened. For someone who wished it had never happened, Jesse Alvarez had integrated himself so deeply in her life, she couldn’t imagine life without him now.

“Jesse,” she said in a quiet voice, deciding now was as good of a time as any to confront the subject.

“Yeah?”

“About…us. You said the night Dad and Aunt Sissy came over that you wished it had never happened. Why?”

He didn’t say anything for a long moment, then finally smiled softly. “It was almost perfect.”

Ellie raised her brows. “Almost?”

“Take away the fact we weren’t married and it would have been perfect.” He glanced over at her and grinned.

“But you never called back.”

He sighed. “I was ashamed. Ashamed I’d let myself down, ashamed I’d let God down, and ashamed I’d dragged you down with me.”

“If I remember correctly, I went pretty willingly.”

He smiled at her then reached over and gently stroked her cheek. “I want a relationship with you, Ellie Saunders, more than anything else. A real relationship. But not on my terms, or your terms…I want it to be on God’s terms.”

****

 

The parking lot of the church was packed and Jesse circled a time or two to find a parking space. Ellie did a double take at a blue Buick parked near the front. “That’s my daddy’s car,” she said, her voice rising slightly.

“Oh, yeah. I invited him and Aunt Sissy.”

“Jesse, why didn’t you tell me they were going to be here?” Her heartbeat rose a notch.

“What difference does it make if they’re here or not?” He glanced at her then parked beside a Toyota compact. “You don’t want them here?”

Ellie wasn’t sure she was ready for all this. She didn’t know what she wanted. “No, I just…I’m just surprised, that’s all.”

“Surprised to see your aunt and your father at church? He’s a preacher, Ellie.”

Ellie shook her head, hoping to clear some of the confusion she was feeling. “He’s a former preacher. He hasn’t preached in…I don’t even know how many years.”

“That doesn’t mean he gave up on God. God certainly doesn’t give up on us, does He?”

“I suppose not,” she said in a small voice, not really wanting to admit Jesse was right again. Just because her father wasn’t standing in a pulpit every Sunday didn’t mean he had turned his back on God. She knew that for a fact. He had never really stopped preaching at all. He seized every opportunity he had to share God’s grace with someone, anyone. “Do they know I’m coming?” she asked as they walked up the front steps.

“I told them to save us a seat.”

Great. She swallowed hard, trying to force the knot in her throat down into her stomach where it could play with the butterflies. Jesse held the front door open then stepped up behind Ellie as she entered. “Wow. Get a load of that,” he whispered in her ear. “Ellie Saunders’s just walked into a church, and it didn’t crumble beneath her.”

Ellie glowered at him, a smirk crossing her lips. Although, truth be told, she was a little surprised the building was still standing. Aunt Sissy spotted them and waved them over.

The church sure wasn’t anything like Ellie remembered churches being. There were no rows of cloth-covered pews. Instead, roll out stadium seats were pulled out from the walls in an octagon shape. The pulpit was down front, slightly elevated with three rows of risers behind it. Choir members dressed in jeans and white shirts filled the risers.

“No robes?” Ellie whispered to Jesse

“We’re not a robe kind of church.” He smiled then offered her his hand as she climbed the bleachers to where Sissy was seated.

Ellie sat down beside Sissy and immediately looked around for her father. “Where’s Daddy?” she asked Sissy.

“He’ll be out in a minute. I’m so glad you came,” Sissy said as she wrapped an arm around Ellie’s shoulder. “I know he’s going to be tickled to death you’re here.”

Jesse sat on the other side of Ellie and chatted loudly with everyone around. After a minute or two of greeting everyone within shouting distance, he leaned across Ellie toward Aunt Sissy. “I think she was a little surprised the building didn’t fall when she walked in.”

“We’re not out of here yet,” Ellie said and grinned.

Ellie searched the crowd for her father but didn’t see him anywhere. A young man in a CrossPoint t-shirt and jeans stood at the pulpit reading announcements into a microphone. He made the announcement about Brittany’s mission trip and a special offering and about an upcoming bowling outing. Suddenly Ellie spotted her father and her heart raced. What was he doing down there? What was he doing at the pulpit? The young man making the announcements introduced the church pastor and then turned to Ellie’s father and welcomed Reverend Ferrin Saunders as their guest speaker.

“Keeping with our revival theme,” the young man said, “Reverend Saunders will be speaking on new beginnings and God’s power of redemption.”

Ellie couldn’t take her eyes off the pulpit and met her father’s gaze when he glanced up at Sissy. He smiled the kindest, proudest smile Ellie had ever seen. She felt the forgiveness start at the top of her head and like a gentle, steady rain, felt it spread from the top of her head to the bottoms of her feet, washing her clean of the past. She sucked in the comfort, relishing in the joy it brought and knew she had found her way back home.

Jesse gently took her hand as her father began to speak again, “Jesus said to her: I am the resurrection and the life: he that believeth in Me, although he be dead, shall live…”

Ellie bowed her head, and she prayed for a fresh start, a new life. A new life like Landon’s. She felt God’s loving arms wrap around her, felt His miraculous hands breathe new life into her heart and soul. And finally, she believed.

The Lazarus Syndrome was real. It had brought her back from the dead, too.