Delilah had expected to fall asleep immediately, but she kept replaying her conversation with Josh, and she wasn’t happy about what it said about her. She couldn’t deny that seeing Nate had rattled her. But had he made her afraid, as Josh said? She hated to admit it, but in that moment, yes. Suddenly she was sixteen again, helpless and terrified.
But she wasn’t that girl anymore, and she had to keep living like she believed it. Despite Josh’s desire to protect her, which touched something deep inside her, she’d also learned that her safety, physical and emotional, was ultimately up to her.
Her worry now was for Mary, a bone-deep determination to keep her from the same hellacious situation.
But were her old fears sabotaging her relationship with Josh? In an effort to play it safe emotionally, was she depriving them both? If they got involved, saying goodbye would be brutal. Oh, who was she kidding? It would be anyway. So why not enjoy every minute they had together?
She tiptoed into the living room, worried he might have fallen asleep already. Seeing him sprawled across the middle of the sofa bed, blanket bunched around his hips, made her want to touch.
As she approached, he sat up, scrubbed a hand over his face, and held out a hand in invitation. “Everything okay?” The husky timbre of his voice slid over her skin like a caress.
“It is now,” she whispered as she climbed onto the bed and sat beside him. She cupped his jaw and brushed a kiss over his lips, once, twice, before she pulled back.
In the dim light, she saw the question in his eyes, the barely banked fire. “Tell me what you want,” he whispered, pulling her close and kissing her, long and slow and deep.
When they pulled apart, she studied him a moment. What she wanted was him, with a desperation that frightened her, but she couldn’t offer forever, wouldn’t weave fantasies that could never come true. But she could give him honesty. “You know I’m not staying in Ocala. I can’t. But what if we make the most of the time we have?”
Their eyes met, and the silence lengthened as he studied her. “You’re sure?”
She ran the back of her hand down his cheek and smiled. “I’m sure.”
He leaned closer and tucked her hair behind her ear, his voice a low rumble. “Then let me love you tonight, and we’ll let tomorrow take care of itself.”
When his lips met hers, they slipped into that magical world where only the two of them existed. His tongue swept into her mouth and shut down her busy brain. All that existed were him and her and this moment.
She cupped his cheeks as she kissed him, determined to show him all the feelings she couldn’t put into words. Hands tangled in his hair, she gave him everything in her heart, and he did the same. Her eyes slid closed as he nuzzled her neck, then ran a line of kisses down her arm before he placed a tender kiss in her palm. She took his hand and did the same, the green fire in his eyes scorching everywhere it touched.
Their mouths met again, and their tongues danced, the heat in her belly coiling tighter and tighter. Frustrated that she still couldn’t get close enough to him, she swung her leg over and straddled his lap, enjoying his low moan when she settled over him, running her hands over his shoulders and chest, enjoying the feel of the crisp hair covering his pecs.
“I like the way you think, Xena,” he murmured and pulled her flush against him.
She sighed and nibbled the side of his neck, enjoying the idea that she could make him moan. His hands slid under her sleep shirt, and this time, she was the one who moaned.
“You feel good,” she said, running her tongue along his collarbone, then nipping his ear.
“I was thinking the same thing about you,” he said, then gripped the edges of her shirt, yanked it over her head, and tossed it away. “You take my breath away.” He studied her, trailing a hand from her neck to her waist and back again, touching and caressing along the way. Heat spiraled through her, and she pulled him closer, shifting restlessly.
“Hold that thought,” he muttered, then reached over the side of the bed for his pants. Once he found what he needed, he pulled her down to stretch out over him, and she sighed at the feel of his body under her.
With every touch, every caress, every slide of skin against skin, the heat built as their kisses grew more frantic, more desperate. He gripped her backside while their tongues tangled, fought.
Finally, when she thought she couldn’t stand it another minute, he threaded his fingers through hers. “Look at me,” he ordered, and she met his eyes. Gazes locked, they climbed to the stars together, higher and higher, until they reached the heavens and shattered in a burst of light.
A long time later, when their heartbeats had returned to normal, he pulled the covers over them and tucked her against his side.
“Sleep, Xena. I’ve got you.”
“And I’ve got you,” she murmured and burrowed closer. She listened to the steady beat of his heart and slid into a deep, dreamless sleep.
* * *
Several hours later, Josh’s eyes snapped open. He woke completely alert, as always, but it took a second to identify where he was and the warm body snuggled in close to him, her arm across his belly, her hair tickling his cheek. He grinned. He could get used to this.
Or not.
He frowned as he watched her sleep, the furrow between her brows gone, all her sharp edges erased for the moment.
I’m not staying…
She’d warned him, had been up front about their relationship or whatever the hell she wanted to call it, and he’d agreed to her terms.
His gut clenched. He’d been a fool. Somehow, when he wasn’t paying attention, she’d snuck past all his defenses.
She stiffened suddenly and started shifting restlessly, caught in the midst of a nightmare. He tightened his hold on her and murmured soothing words in her ear until she calmed again and settled back into sleep.
He watched her as the minutes ticked by, running his hand up and down her arm as he absorbed the fact that her happiness, her safety, meant everything to him. Ready or not and despite all her secrets, she’d burrowed into his heart, way down deep, to a place no one had ever touched before.
As he tucked the covers over them both, he decided he had neither the strength nor the desire to push her out. Ever.
And he was okay with that.
Now all he had to do was keep her alive while they rescued her sister.
And then figure out how to let her go.
* * *
The sun was barely up when she woke, and it took a moment to figure out where she was. Josh was gone, but she heard his voice outside, probably on the phone. She stretched, then sighed, remembering the way he’d made love to her during the night, the way he’d held her close. But it went deeper than that. Nobody had ever seen her the way he did, had ever touched her with such tenderness and want. When worries about how she would ever manage to say goodbye tried to intrude, she locked them away to think about some other time.
Today was Sunday. If all went well, Mary would be safely in her arms in just a few hours. She sent up a quick prayer. Please God, let her show up.
She grabbed a shower, packed her research gear, and headed to the kitchen. “I’ll go crazy sitting here all morning, so how about we check on my favorite monkey troop after breakfast?”
“Good morning to you, too,” he drawled, leaning against the counter sipping coffee. He was already fully dressed, and Delilah hid her disappointment. Though the way that T-shirt molded to his chest offered ample compensation.
She walked over, gave him a long, lingering kiss. “Sorry. Good morning. I’m a little wound up.”
“Do you still want coffee, then?”
“Oh, I’m never that wound.” She smiled and reached past him for a mug, brushing a hand along his jaw as she did.
After breakfast, they drove to the same location as before, but it took longer to find the troop, since they’d moved much farther into the forest. As before, Josh kept his eyes on their surroundings while Delilah pulled out her camera and started cataloguing the monkeys’ faces.
“Did you name them all?” he asked after he overheard her talking to them.
She flushed. “Not all. Several of the alpha males, certainly, some of the females. But mostly the little ones.”
“I’m onto you, Miss Atwood. It’s not really about research. You’re just a sucker for an adorable monkey face.”
She lowered her camera. “Busted. Aren’t they sweet?” She showed him several pictures of Oscar, then sobered. “But I still can’t find the mothers. It’s like they’ve vanished.”
“You’re absolutely sure?”
She drew a shaky breath. “As sure as I can be. Not only are those four gone, but two more are missing.”
“Mothers?”
“Yes. It looks like two of the other mothers adopted the infants.” She scrolled through her photos. “See, they’ve each got two now, where they only had one before.”
Josh scrubbed his chin. “Hunter checked. Nobody has a permit to trap them out here. Let’s see if there is any more evidence of humans in the area before we go.”
There wasn’t, but that didn’t make Delilah feel any better.
“We’ll get our biologist to check it out, see if he can give us any answers,” Josh said as they returned to the truck.
When they reached the main road, they had barely enough time to get to the church before services let out. Josh reached over the truck’s console and gripped her hand. “Breathe. It’ll be okay.”
Worry hummed under her skin. “What if she can’t get away? What if John Henry—”
He gave her hand an extra squeeze. “Let’s just get there first.”
They parked in the dense forest and quietly wound their way to the secluded clearing she and Mary used to disappear to.
Josh propped one leg on the log where Delilah sat, leaned on his forearm as he looked around. “Why this spot?”
She smiled. “As soon as the preacher said amen, the men would congregate outside on one side of the church and the women on the other, and rather than stand around in the heat, starving, Mary and I would sneak into the woods until we heard Mama calling. It was cooler here and quieter, and as a bonus, it kept me from getting recruited to help with canning and birthing.” She shuddered. “And from getting shanghaied into babysitting or meal prep duty for moms who had just given birth.”
“I take it those weren’t your favorite assignments?”
Delilah shook her head, remembering. “I’d much rather fish or be part of target practice. But I only got to do those things when we were alone. Otherwise, things were strictly divided along male-female roles.”
“Have you really helped deliver a baby?”
Just as she opened her mouth to respond, she heard a whooshing noise. Without thought, she dropped down beside the log. Josh landed on top of her, covering her with his body.
They stayed that way for several seconds before Delilah raised her head. She locked eyes with him, and they both looked up and spotted it at the same time.
There was a knife embedded in the tree just beyond where they had been sitting. Had they not ducked, it would have hit one of them.
“Stay down.” Josh crouched by the log, weapon drawn, prepared to head into the forest.
“Mary! Let’s go. What are you doing out here?”
At the sound of John Henry’s angry growl, Delilah froze. Had he followed her? She waited, heart pounding.
“I’m sorry, Papa. I was just taking a walk.”
Delilah’s heart clenched at the way her sister’s voice shook.
“You know better than to disappear without permission.”
This was her chance. Delilah opened her backpack and closed her hand around her gun. She’d force him to let Mary go. Right now. She lurched to her feet, gun down at her side, ready to burst out of the trees and get her sister.
From somewhere nearby, she heard pounding feet and children’s laughter as they ran by.
She hadn’t taken more than a single step when Josh wrapped his arms around her from behind and pulled her back against his chest. She elbowed him in the ribs and tried to break free, but he simply tightened his hold. “Let me go,” she hissed. “What are you doing?”
His voice was quiet in her ear. “Too many people. Children. And whoever threw that knife is probably still out here.”
She hadn’t considered any of that, all her focus on Mary. Had John Henry thrown the knife, knowing Mary was coming to meet her? That didn’t make sense. So it had to be someone else. If Delilah showed herself, would whoever it was hurt her sister? Or the children?
More childish giggles rang out, and she froze. Oh God. She couldn’t get her sister without risking innocent lives. With every passing second, Mary and John Henry’s voices faded, and her window of opportunity disappeared.
Delilah stepped out of Josh’s arms, saw the way he eyed her gun, and anger flared, hot and bright. Right. FWC officer. He couldn’t stand by and watch her threaten her father at gunpoint. Dammit. Another reason she shouldn’t have gotten involved with him. She squeezed her eyes shut, beyond frustrated with him, herself, the whole freaking situation.
She tucked her weapon in her backpack, cataloguing options, searching for another way to rescue her sister.
Josh pulled gloves and a plastic bag from one of the pockets of his cargo pants. After a quick look around, he stepped over to the tree and quickly bagged the knife. “Let’s find a better hiding place. Whoever threw this will be coming back to see what he hit. I want to be ready.”
Delilah marched after him, and they crouched in the bushes for almost an hour, but no one showed up. Frustrated anger still churned under her skin when Josh stood and pulled her up beside him, apology thick in his expression. “I’m sorry.”
Without a word, she headed for his truck. Logic told her he’d done the right thing, but she still wasn’t feeling very logical. She only knew Mary had been close enough to touch and she’d lost her chance.
* * *
Neither said a word as they waited outside the community center. Delilah used the time to wrestle her frustration under control and think about her upcoming meeting with Mama. Would she be able to convince her?
When her mother appeared, Delilah’s heart clenched. She looked so much older than her years. Her life was not an easy one, and her body bore the evidence.
“What are you hoping to accomplish?” Josh asked quietly as she opened her door.
She glanced over her shoulder, ignored the caring in his expression. “Ideally, Mama will agree to help me get Mary away from the campsite. But I’m not holding my breath on that one,” she added when Josh started to protest. “If not that, I want to know who they’re marrying her off to.”
“You’ll try to convince the groom to back out of the deal?”
Delilah kept her expression bland. “Something like that. Though I don’t figure this scumbag will want to give up his child bride willingly,” she muttered.
“You know you can’t just pull a gun—”
Delilah held up a hand. “Do not tell me what I can and cannot do. I am going to keep my sister from getting married at sixteen. End of story.”
“It’s not the end of the story and you know it. I said I’d help. But you have to follow—”
Delilah missed whatever else he said, because she slid out of the truck and slammed the door. Let Mr. By-the-Book do things his way. She’d make her own plans.
At the door to the clinic, she paused and took a deep breath before she walked inside. Then another. Honesty forced her to admit that her anger at Josh was misplaced. She was beyond furious with her father and the whole situation. Josh was just a convenient target. And that wasn’t fair to him. At all.
She forced a smile at the older woman who manned the receptionist desk. “Good afternoon. I’m here to see Kimberly Gaines.”
“I’m sorry, but Ms. Gaines is currently with another patient,” the woman said.
“Yes, I know. I’m supposed to be part of that meeting. Thank you.” She strode down the hall and straight into Kimberly’s office, closing the door behind her before the woman could cause a ruckus.
“Hello, Ms…ah…Kimberly.
Hello, Mama.” She leaned down to her mother’s chair and gave her a quick hug.
After a stunned moment of disbelief, Mama hopped up and wrapped Delilah in a fierce hug. “Oh, baby girl. I thought you were dead.” Tears poured down her cheeks as she pulled back and cupped Delilah’s face with her warm hands. “You’re okay. Oh, thank you, Jesus, you’re okay.”
Delilah met Kimberly’s chiding expression. She’d totally forgotten that her mother thought she had died, too. She’d always felt socially inept, like she regularly missed social cues, but never more so than now. “I’m sorry you thought I was dead, Mama.”
“But why are you letting people think that?”
Again, she and Kimberly exchanged looks. Could she trust Mama? How much would she feel compelled to tell John Henry? “It’s better this way.”
“Better for whom? What’s going on, Delilah?”
“Why don’t we sit down and talk this through?” Kimberly ushered them to the sagging love seat while she took the chair opposite.
Delilah opened her mouth, but all her carefully rehearsed words didn’t seem appropriate. Or maybe they were, since the bottom line was the same. “I need to talk to you about Mary.” Delilah leaned forward and grabbed both of Mama’s work-worn hands in her own. “She’s only sixteen, Mama. It’s too young to get married. She wants to go to school and be independent and choose her own husband someday when she’s ready. Can you understand that?” she asked gently.
Mama waved that away. “She doesn’t know her own mind. She needs a strong man to guide her, to help her mature and give her the chance to be a mother.”
Delilah’s stomach turned at hearing the exact same words Mama had said to her so many years ago. Words John Henry had clearly drilled into her. “Wouldn’t it be better for her to make her own choices? When she’s older and does know her own mind? Don’t you want that for her?”
Mama reared back as though Delilah had slapped her. “You don’t think I want what’s best for my daughters? I’ve spent my whole life trying to do right by my family.”
“I’ve never doubted your love for us, Mama. Not once. But right now, if you love Mary, you need to convince Papa to call this off.”
All the color drained from Mama’s face. She gripped her hands together and looked away, and Delilah’s hope sank.
“Your father makes the decisions he thinks are best. It is my job to support them.”
“Even if he’s wrong? Even if this is a terrible idea?” Mentioning it was also illegal wouldn’t help.
“Eli is a good man. He’ll take good care of Mary.”
“Eli Foster?” she asked. Nausea threatened as Delilah pictured the tall, middle-aged man they’d met at the campfire putting his hands on her sister.
“He’s a good man, Delilah,” her mother repeated. “His son needs a mother. And Mary needs a firm hand.” Then her chin came up, and accusation filled her eyes. “When you turned your back on Nate, you brought shame to our family. This is your father’s chance to make it right. John Henry needs to reclaim his place in our world. Mary is the key to that.”
Delilah gripped Mama’s hands, hard. “Don’t allow this, Mama. It’s not right. Please, let Mary come live with me.”
Mama stood and grabbed the straps of her purse, chin up. “I will not go against my husband’s wishes. And I will not interfere between a husband and his wife. I’m very glad you’re okay.” She turned toward the door.
“Wait. When is the wedding?”
Mama paused, hand on the doorknob. She didn’t turn, just whispered, “On her birthday,” and then left.
Delilah tried to follow, but Kimberly stopped her with a hand on her arm. “Let her go. She won’t listen, not now.”
Delilah spun and slammed a hand against the wall. That was the second time today Mary had slipped through her fingers.
Kimberly wrapped her arms around her, and Delilah stiffened. She didn’t need comfort. She needed a plan. “We’ll figure it out. We’ll figure it out,” Kimberly murmured.
When Kimberly finally released her, Delilah said, “Thank you for trying to help. I need to go.”
She hurried out of the building and didn’t stop until she climbed into the cab of Josh’s truck. He sent her a sympathetic glance, put the truck in gear, and headed out of the parking lot.
Her mother’s predictable response shouldn’t hurt as much as it did. She rubbed a hand over the ache in her heart and focused on finding another way to get her sister. She wouldn’t stop until she did.
They only had four more days.
* * *
Josh watched her ruthlessly bring her emotions under control. He hadn’t expected the meeting to go well and figured she hadn’t either. But his heart still hurt at the anguish etched in her face.
“What are we doing here?” she asked as he pulled up at his place. Judging by the vehicles, the rest of the squad had already arrived.
“Quick strategy meeting to go over details for the Mayor’s Ball tomorrow night. County Commissioner Benson is slated to be the master of ceremonies, but no one has seen him in two days.”
Delilah nodded and climbed out of the truck, her mind obviously elsewhere.
“Look, about before—” he began, but she didn’t let him finish.
“I understand that you were trying to protect me—and Mary. I do.” She huffed out a breath, sighed. “Let’s just move on, okay?”
He narrowed his eyes, and his radar twitched at how easily she let him off the hook.
Once inside, Josh recapped what happened outside the church, and Sanchez offered to check the knife for prints and see if it matched the one used in Black’s murder.
“I’m sorry you couldn’t get your sister to come with you,” Fish said.
Delilah looked surprised, then nodded her thanks.
Hunter spoke up. “We think it’s time to shake a few trees, see what falls out. Commissioner Benson’s secretary said he’s checked in by phone, so he’s alive, but he’s not returning our phone calls. We’re hoping to question him at the ball. In the meantime, we’re still picking up rumors about gun shipments and trying to figure out if either of those things are connected to Black’s death.” He nodded to Josh. “Hollywood discovered that Nathan Hamm is a big contributor to Commissioner Benson’s reelection campaign. So is Eli Foster, although he’s not given nearly as much.”
Delilah’s eyebrows shot to her hairline. “You’re saying these two antigovernment types are now going to balls and contributing to election campaigns? That makes no sense.”
“Agreed. It’s out of character, which means there has to be some agenda we don’t know about.” Hunter leaned forward. “We believe you’re the thread that connects it all. If you’re willing, we’re going to send you to the ball as Josh’s date. We’re hoping the shock of seeing you alive will loosen a few tongues.” He quirked a smile. “A generous dose of free alcohol never hurts, either.”
She looked around the room, then back at Hunter, and a calculating expression darted over her features. “What about the rest of the team?”
“Everyone else will be working security. And we’ll be keeping a close eye on you. Don’t worry. You’ll be perfectly safe.”
“All right. I’m in.”
Her calm acceptance confirmed his suspicions. Josh tried to catch her eye, but she avoided his gaze. She was hatching a plan in that beautiful head of hers. He just had to figure out what it was before she put herself in danger.