Chapter 6

ONE MINUTE PHOENIX was worrying about what would happen if – when – the shifters discovered she had no animal, the next she was drowning in waves of heat.

She gasped as Travis claimed her mouth, sweeping inside and capturing her tongue with his. All thoughts evaporated as she clutched his shoulders and lost herself in his kiss.

Long, drugging minutes later, he released her lips to trail kisses along her jaw to her neck, at which point his arms closed around her convulsively and he pulled her tight to his body, burying his face in her neck and inhaling deeply.

She wondered if she smelled as amazing to him as he did to her. His woodsy scent had intensified with every kiss until her head swam with the headiness of it.

“I wonder if your animal’s napping?” he asked.

“What?” She pulled away to stare at him. 

“She’s really subtle, barely there at all. I wondered if she’s curled up, taking a nap.”

Just those words made Phoenix shiver with desire. She could almost imagine how wonderful it would be. Curled up, napping in her dream space, Travis curled around her, holding her safe.

“Ah,” Travis said, a satisfied rumble in his voice. “There she is.”

“What?”

“Your animal’s peeking at me from your eyes.” He cupped her cheeks and stared deeply. “There you are, sweet love. Don’t be shy.”

A little freaked out, Phoenix blinked a couple times.

Travis sighed. “Ah, well. Maybe next time.” He kissed her gently. “No worries, darlin’. I’ve got tons of patience. I’ll coax her out.” He spoke without lifting his lips from hers, punctuating the end of each sentence with a firm kiss. 

After one last, heat-filled kiss that swamped all her senses, Travis finally pulled away. “I know you must be exhausted, so I’ll leave you to your nap.” He walked to the door. “If you need anything, my apartment’s across the way and Glory’s is at the end of the hall. It’s Glory’s night to cook if you want to join us. We’ll eat at her place at four.” And with that, he was gone. 

After that, it took a while for Phoenix to settle enough to actually enjoy her nap. This had never happened before. In the past, her dream state was only ever seconds away. She’d curl up or lie down and in seconds would be happy and warm. 

But today, every time she was about to find that place, the memory of Travis’ kisses would ignite a flash of heat and her dream state would slip away as desire engulfed her. She had to call upon the meditation techniques she’d developed while living in foster homes growing up, techniques that had kept her sane while living in impossible situations, surrounded by people she didn’t trust. 

It had been a long time since she’d needed to meditate before napping. The moment she’d been free of the state’s care, she’d begun a slow but steady progression upward until one day she’d slid into her dream state the moment her head hit the pillow and she’d not needed to meditate since.

Today though. Today that sexy bartender had completely eradicated years of work and her dream state had never seemed so far away.

After long minutes of deep breathing and other exercises to blank her mind, Phoenix finally managed to relax enough that she was able to spend ninety-five glorious minutes napping before her alarm cut through the soft beat of the drum and woke her.

As she got ready for the evening and her bar shift, Phoenix pondered her dream. There had been no reaching this time. Just the same dream as always, the same sensation of sleeping curled somewhere safe and warm, listening to the soft beat of drums. And she wondered as she always did, where this place was that she dreamed of and who played the drums she heard there. Knowing there were no answers to these questions, for she’d had them as long as she could remember, Phoenix relegated them to the back of her mind and left her apartment.

A few seconds later, she stood outside the door to Glory’s apartment and tried to convince herself to knock. She wasn’t sure what she was doing there. Sure, Travis had invited her, but she wasn’t sure she really wanted to continue building connections with him or his sister. They believed she was a shifter too and she just didn’t know how she felt about that. She was afraid to hope and she was worried about their reaction if they were wrong. Would they hate her if she was only human? 

At that moment, the door swung open and Travis grinned at her. “You ever going to knock?” 

Phoenix shrugged. “How’d you know I was here?”

“I keep forgetting your animal doesn’t have the same sense of smell most shifters do. Which is really kind of weird when you think about it.”

“Oh, don’t listen to him.” Glory shoved her brother aside and grabbed Phoenix’s arm. “Come on in, Phoenix. I’m so happy you decided to join us and I’m especially glad you agreed to move into the empty apartment.” She led Phoenix through a spacious living space into an even larger kitchen that smelled amazing. “Have a seat.” She waved a hand at a bar stool that stood on one side of a huge kitchen island. “We’ve talked about renting out the apartment before, but it’s so small, we weren’t sure any shifter would ever want to live there. And of course, we’d never offer it to a human.”

Phoenix winced and was glad Glory wasn’t looking at her, but instead was bustling around the kitchen, grabbing bowls and filling them with the delicious smelling meal she’d been preparing. 

Though it wasn’t a great beginning, the rest of the afternoon was lovely. Glory had a fabulous sense of humor and Travis was super attentive, asking lots of questions that of course, Phoenix did her best to deflect. He asked about where she’d lived and she entertained them with stories of the different bars she’d worked in all over the country. 

When he asked why she chose to work with full humans, she just shrugged and said, “It was less complicated that way.” She didn’t even know why it would be less complicated to work in a human bar, but it seemed the sort of thing that might be true.

Travis nodded. “I’m sure it’s easier to handle brawling humans than shifters. And even though you didn’t know you were applying to a shifter bar, I’m glad you did. You could have gone to the full human bar the next town over.”

And she probably would have had she only known. “Yeah, but this was closer.”

She was trying hard not to actually lie to Glory and Travis. After all, they were super nice and had taken a chance, both in giving her a job and in letting her stay in the apartment. At the same time, she wasn’t sure it was the best idea she’d ever had, taking them up on either offer.

And how could she possibly pursue whatever was happening between her and Travis when he didn’t even really know her?

Thankfully she didn’t have much time to worry about it because six o’clock came quickly and before she knew it, they had to be downstairs prepping the bar to open.

As the night wore on, the bar became more and more crowded and it wasn’t long before Phoenix realized Travis was right. The wolves and cougars were going to do their best to figure out her beast. That was okay though because she figured as long as they were trying to guess it, there was no chance of them realizing she didn’t have one.

Every time she took an order or brought drinks to a table, some wolf or cougar would try to guess her animal. Every animal you could think of. Phoenix just kept shaking her head because of course, no matter what they guessed, they were always wrong. No matter what Travis thought he’d seen in her eyes.

If she was a shifter, she’d know it.

Maybe she was being a little stubborn. After all, she’d grown up in foster care without any knowledge of her real family, but still. From what she’d seen of these shifters, stress, anger, frustration and even laughter could make them experience an unplanned shift or partial shift. One of the cougars got to laughing uncontrollably and a bunch of whiskers popped out of his cheeks, which just caused more laughter and more whiskers to appear. 

Not to mention that when the cougars drank too much, they had a tendency to go full-on cat and take naps under the tables (something Phoenix completely related to, even though alcohol was never a requirement in her case). And when the wolves got drunk, they tended to howl. A lot.

 The more Phoenix learned about these shifters and the more she got to know them, the more she wished it wasn’t true. That she wasn’t human. That they were right and she did have an animal hiding somewhere deep inside. Unfortunately, she was pretty sure she would have shifted at least once as a child and especially as a teenager, living in the stressful environments she had. Which meant she was human. Depressingly, boringly human.

“Unicorn,” one of the cougars guessed as she set down his beer. 

“Seriously, Cole?” Another cougar rolled his eyes. “I’m pretty sure we’d have heard about unicorn shifters.”

“You never know!” Cole exclaimed. “I mean, there aren’t that many animals whose scent I wouldn’t recognize. I bet it’s the same for you, Dan. I think unicorn makes perfect sense.”

Phoenix just shook her head and headed to the next table where a bunch of wolves were hanging out.

“I was right, wasn’t I?” Pete, one of the wolves from the diner earlier that day, asked. 

“Right about what?”

“You’re named for your animal, aren’t you? The cat actually makes sense. Of course, we wouldn’t recognize the scent of a mythical creature. But it’s not a unicorn. It’s a phoenix, right?”

“I was named for the city I was found in, not for the animal I can shift into.” Phoenix handed him his whisky and walked away. 

“Wait, what does that mean? Found in?”

Shit. Phoenix ignored his question and hurried back to the bar to get another round of drinks. 

 She couldn’t believe she’d revealed something so personal. All the questions were starting to get to her though. Everyone had agreed that she wasn’t a bear, a cat or a wolf, simply because they were all certain they’d recognize that scent. This seemed to be the only thing they agreed on though. They pretty much argued about everything else, insisting that she could be almost any other animal (though no one suggested human).

And so the guesses kept coming, making her sadder as the night wore on, because she was pretty sure she wasn’t a buffalo, moose, elk, deer, fox, raccoon, squirrel, opossum or any of the other animals they’d suggested.

“You okay?” Travis asked as she set her empty tray on top of the bar.

She nodded. 

“Don’t worry. They’ll give up after a while.”

She forced a smile. “It’s fine. They’re just having some fun.”

He studied her for a minute, then shook his head. “They don’t get to make you sad though.” He started to untie his bar apron. “I’ll make them stop.”

“No, it’s fine.” If he made them stop, they might wonder why.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah. It’s fine.”

He leaned over the bar, caught the back of her neck, pulled her close and kissed her. 

Heat swamped Phoenix as she clutched his shoulders and kissed him back. 

The whistles and howls of cougars and wolves eventually broke them apart. 

“What was that for?” Phoenix breathed softly, inhaling his incredible scent and savoring his taste on her lips and tongue.

He grinned. “Just letting them know you’re mine. In every way.”

That statement should have annoyed Phoenix. She belonged to no one but herself. Instead, it made her feel warm and safe. Protected in a way she’d never really felt before. Smiling, she turned and walked back to her tables, handing out beers and drinks and taking new orders as she went, the pestering and questions about her animal no longer penetrating the fog of comfort that surrounded her.

Later that night, Travis left Phoenix at her door after a long round of kisses and caresses and extreme petting that left her gasping for breath and horny as hell. She came so close to inviting him in. The only thing that held her back was how different they were and her fear that he’d be disappointed if he knew she was only human.