Oh dear, the suit that fashion forgot. My first impression of the football club was that it was a bit like a Butlins holiday camp, but I think I may have taken it a little too far.
Crystal Palace manager number 1 Steve Coppell.
In the stand away to Blackburn Rovers, the first league game of my ownership. Little did I know what joys awaited.
Manager number 2: Alan Smith.
Nearly relegated at Stockport County. I likened it to 90 minutes in the dentist’s chair, much to my own dentist’s chagrin.
Clinton Morrison celebrating with Dougie Freedman after surviving relegation at Stockport County. Freedman’s goal was enough to secure our safety.
My dream team: Bruce, Kember and Bullivant who started so brightly but ended so disappointingly.
Steve Bruce leaving the High Court in London after the club won a temporary injunction preventing Bruce from quitting the club without serving nine months notice.
Manager number 5: Steve Kember.
The dream achieved: Neil Shipperley scores the £50 million pound goal in the 2004 play-off final against West Ham. Cue celebrations.
One of my favourite players, Andy Johnson, celebrates scoring in yet another win against the soon-to-be champions of Europe, Liverpool.
Winning promotion in 2004 meant that I had delivered on my promise to bring Premier League football to Selhurst Park a year ahead of schedule.
Consoling Iain Dowie on the pitch at Charlton after being relegated from the Premier League. With what was to come later, perhaps my grip on his neck should have been slightly tighter.
Playing in the Geoff Thomas testimonial game against a Manchester United XI in a reprise of the 1990 FA Cup final. Who says Chairmen can’t play football?
Playing in the first game at the new Wembley, and scoring the second ever goal at the stadium.
Outside of the FA tribunal where I was found guilty of a ludicrous charge of improper conduct and given a gagging order, I was my usual reticent self with the press.
Flanked by my brother Dominic and Phil Alexander at the first leg of the 2006 play-off semi-final against Watford. My feeling of impending doom surrounding the game is being realised in front of me. We went on to lose 0–3. Bob Dowie is sat on my left, within earshot of my opinions.
Both myself and Iain Dowie arriving – not together, I hasten to add – in court for the landmark case where Dowie was found guilty of fraudulent misrepresentation.
Manager Number 7: Peter Taylor.
With Lynval Golding of The Specials at my 40th birthday party. Helping to reform The Specials was one of my proudest achievements.
In the stands with former England manager Steve McClaren, Spurs chairman Daniel Levy and my ‘pal’ Paul Kemsley, then vice-chairman of Spurs.
With Nick, Carl Barat, JJ Feild and Pam Ferris at the World Premiere of Telstar.
Sat in my award-winning restaurant, The Club Bar and Dining in Soho.
Manager number 8: Neil Warnock. The headline was ‘a marriage made in hell’. My best appointment turned out to be my last appointment.
The 2008 play-off push. Victor Moses, one of the stars from my treasured academy celebrates scoring against Burnley. He would later go on to be sold for peanuts by the administrator.
John Bostock, revered as the best footballer of his age in Europe. It was a disappointment when he chose to go to Spurs.
Watching the 5–0 win against Burnley that clinches our position in the play-offs.