Chapter Fourteen

I GENTLY TOUCHED NAOMI’S shoulder. “Hey, sleepyhead. Wake up.” I watched, as those eyes I loved so much blinked awake. She stretched and smiled at me.

“Are we here?”

I shook my head yes, as I leaned over to kiss her. “Welcome home.”

She cupped my face with both hands. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve been waiting to hear you say that?”

“Too long, I know.” I pointed to the giant Jesus. “Welcome to House of the Rising Son. Jesus says, hi.”

I watched her reaction as she looked up at the giant Jesus shadow.

“You weren’t kidding me, were you?”

I reached for the door handle. “Nope. Watch yourself. The ground is likely icy, and your boots aren’t exactly made for trudging through a foot and a half of snow.”

Naomi rolled her eyes at me and pushed open the car door. “Again, you forget, I was born in the Colorado Rockies, honey. I think I can handle what you call deep snow.”

“My bad.” I pulled our bags out of the back of the Land Cruiser and pointed to the small set of steps to the left of Jesus. I handed her the keys. “Can you unlock the door?”

“That I can.”

We made our way through the courtyard, and I marveled that she was there with me. I truly thought I’d missed my chance, and yet, there she was, sliding the key in the door as if she’d done it a thousand times.

“The light is there to the left, just inside.” She fumbled for a moment, until she found the right switch and turned the hallway light on. I nodded with my head up the steps. I was struggling with our bags. She took the guitar case from me, and I walked up behind her. Even though her coat hid her shapely ass, I knew exactly what it looked like.

“Quit staring at my ass, Rhebekka.”

I laughed and nearly fell down the stairs. Naomi pushed open the door to the loft and stood a foot inside the darkened room. I hit the lights.

“Wow, this place is beautiful.” She set the case on the floor and pulled off her gloves.

“Let me take your coat.” I helped her slip out of it and watched her take everything in. “I’ll get a fire going in a minute. There’s wine, whiskey, and beer in the kitchen. Glasses are in the cabinet above the sink.

After I’d moved around the room turning on two torch lamps, I wadded up a few pieces of newspaper and put them in the fireplace. With kindling covering that, the fire easily lit off. I held my hands up to the flames and turned to watch her beautiful form moving around my kitchen, our kitchen, if what she’d told me held true. I caught her smile more than once and realized, even without the fire, the entire loft was warmer. As the flames grew, I added a few larger pieces of wood and closed the glass door. I wanted to call Karmen and check that they’d made it back. To be honest, I wanted to check on both of my friends, that ride home couldn’t have been pleasant.

“I need to see if the girls made it back. Feel free to look around.”

She walked over and handed me a tumbler filled with a few ice cubes and two inches of amber liquid. “Go ahead, give them my love. Where’s the bathroom?”

I pointed back to the small hallway. “First door to the right.” When she was out of my sight, I called Karmen. After two rings, she answered.

“Did you make it back all right?”

“We did. Tank went to the bar to make sure everything was running smoothly. Senna had everything well in hand at the store when I called her earlier today. I decided I just wanted to come home.”

“Thank you for being there. I know today was hard on you.”

“Only because I let it be. I think it’s time to stop wishing for something that’s never going to happen.”

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. “I’m glad Naomi didn’t do that.”

“I’m so happy for you. Naomi seems like a keeper. What did she think of your place?”

“We just got in.” I looked up to see Naomi in a pair of leggings and an oversized Colorado sweatshirt. “She’s making herself at home.”

“Good, now maybe you’ll get some regular sleep and eat more than what I drop off.”

A barefooted Naomi made her way to my stereo system and browsed through my CD collection. She made her selection and I heard the first strains of Jason Mraz’s “I Won’t Give Up.” I swallowed hard and fought back the tears. “Right now, sleep is the last thing I want.” I was so grateful she hadn’t given up, no matter how hard I pushed, no matter how stubborn I was, no matter how withdrawn I’d become, she’d never given up.

“And that’s my cue to go. I love you, Rhebekka. Bring Naomi by the store when you come up for air.”

“Will do, just don’t expect that to be any time soon.”

“Go get it, girl. ‘Night.”

I hung up the phone and added large chunks of split wood in with the pieces that blazed like the desire within my center. My call to Tank could wait. “Karmen sounded resigned but surviving.” Naomi pushed her hair behind her ears.

“Did they have any trouble on the way home?”

“Karmen didn’t say. Tank went to the brewery and her apartment is attached. I’m sure she’s in for the night as well.” I picked up my drink and took a swallow. My mind undressed the woman I never thought would be standing there in my home.

Naomi walked up to me and took a sip from my glass before putting it down. “Then I’d say I’m done talking for the night.” She wrapped her arms around my neck and started to dance with me.

Without her boots, she was a few inches shorter than me. I pulled her close and swayed with her. No longer able to stand even that distance, I picked her up to hold her in my arms. She naturally wrapped her legs around my waist, the same way she’d done hundreds of times before. She put her lips on mine. Her mouth tasted of the Jack Daniels lingering on her tongue as it slid across my own. My need for her hadn’t been this all-consuming since the first night we’d made love. In those days, my pursuit of her had been relentless, overcoming every argument she gave me. The lyrics cut right into me, as the realization of how close I’d come to losing my entire world came crashing in. I held her close to my body and slid a hand under the back of the sweatshirt to find warm skin. Groaning into her mouth, my other hand roamed under the fabric and up her back. She wore nothing underneath.

“I want you.”

She didn’t say a word, only nodded, as I carefully knelt. I laid her down on the soft rug in front of the fire warming the room. With one swift motion, I pulled the sweatshirt over her head to reveal beautiful breasts, perfect in every way. Leaning over her, I took one of her taut nipples in my mouth. Her fingers made their way into my hair, pressing my lips hard to her skin. Her body arched beneath me. I slipped her leggings off. I held myself above her and marveled at the beauty beneath me, adorned only with a small, gold cross on a chain.

Her hands tugged at the T-shirt I’d changed into after the funeral. I sat up and quickly pulled it off. She smiled as she pushed up the jog bra and ran her hands over my small breasts before relieving me of the offending piece of fabric. Naomi drew me closer to her by tugging on the burnished wooden cross adorning my neck on a braided leather choker. She’d given it to me the day I humbled myself and took communion for the first time, accepting that I was worthy of the sacraments for the first time in my life.

When our bodies met, she rolled me over onto my back and stared at me. She flipped open the button on my well-worn Levis. I lifted my hips, and she pushed the jeans down. Her expression was priceless.

Wearing nothing beneath those jeans was my small rebellion against society’s expected norms. Naomi ran her fingers through the coarse hair at the juncture of my legs. Watching her eyes flutter closed as her fingers brushed my obvious sign of desire was delicious.

“Off.”

One simple word spoke volumes and I obeyed. When we came back together, skin to skin, I knew I would never be without her by my side again. This was where she belonged and the only place I’d ever want her to be for the rest of my life.

“I love you, Naomi. I love you so much.”

She answered me with a kiss, before she rolled us over again and allowed my body to blanket her entire length. My hands roamed her flesh, reacquainting myself with all the places that made her arch, gasp, and moan. I kissed down her neck and bit gently on the tendon that joined at her shoulder. I licked her pulse point and softly kissed all the way down to her breasts, before taking a puckered nipple into my mouth.

I knew I’d taxed her patience long enough, when she grabbed my wrist and pushed it between us. Leaning on my left elbow, my fingers parted her center, sliding through liquid silk. She was so wet that, when I pulled my fingers away, I felt her desire run down my hand. She growled at me, and I watched her eyes turn from melted arctic ice into black embers the moment I brought my fingers to my mouth and sucked off her passion. I leaned down and kissed her, allowing her to taste herself, as I slid my hand back down her body. She parted her legs for me, and I plunged three fingers into her without hesitation.

I groaned as her body clenched tightly around my fingers, nearly preventing me from pumping into her, as I simultaneously drove my tongue in her mouth. My knee between her parted thighs slammed against my hand, driving my fingers hard into her center.

Slow and sensuous would come later. What we needed now was to throw gasoline on glowing coals too long starved for fuel. We needed hard and fast. Her mouth fell open in a pant, as she pulled desperately on my shoulders, our foreheads pressed together. I moved my thumb to her clit and stroked it with every hard thrust. We were both nearly out of breath and using that blazing fire to forge our souls into one.

I felt her stiffen in my arms. I squeezed my center against her thigh, while her body convulsed against my hand. Her orgasm grabbed onto mine and pulled me over the edge of the cliff with her as we released together. I was lost in the bright rainbow colors behind my eyelids. I was unable to make out anything but the intense pleasure of our shared climax. My heart nearly burst, as I realized I’d never really lost her. The only person who had been adrift was me. Naomi was my lighthouse, the sun, moon, and stars wrapped up in a love so big it swallowed me whole. My heart was hers, and always would be. I gave thanks that she’d refused to give up on this stubborn soul, literally and figuratively. Oh, how I prayed, that someday I would be worthy of her. The truth was I’d never stop trying to be.

 

***

 

It was after midnight. I wrapped her in my arms and carried her to the bedroom on a natural high, softly placing her on my rumpled sheets, still mussed from my abrupt departure. I could have lost it all. Endorphins raged through my body like cocaine. I’d been clean for years. I hadn’t touched drugs since I stopped touring with Regal Crimson, not since the night I destroyed my life. Naomi had told me touring was going to kill me or destroy us. I was pissed. A woman I didn’t know offered me two lines of blow on a compact. That night, I’d been so high I imploded my entire life over a face I, still to this day, couldn’t remember. It was hard to reconcile that my guilt was what had nearly destroyed us in comparison to my infidelity. The woman lying naked in my arms, above my church, had forgiven me before I’d been able to forgive myself. I’d thrown myself into my religious studies and seminary, completely shielding myself in theology, while looking for answers and redemption.

I traced the skin of her arm with my fingertips. She was completely exhausted and, as was my norm, I wouldn’t fall asleep until four. I’d tried herbal teas, supplements, and even meditation. The pattern was still the same. The only thing that exhausted me enough to sleep was music. I couldn’t bring myself to leave her arms even to play.

She stirred and pulled me tighter before she kissed my chest.

“I was right, this hasn’t changed.”

I settled my cheek against the top of her head. “What?”

She pinched me lightly. “You know what. Your four in the morning bedtime. I’m completely wiped out from making love with you, and you still can’t wind down until that magic hour.”

“Years of touring routines cemented into my DNA.”

“Do you ever miss being in the band?”

I shifted her until she was lying completely on top of me. “Singing with Ellie, yes. Everything else, no.”

“I can still see you jumping around that stage in your bra, playing We’re One Step Away, on the Strat. You were so fucking sexy in those leather pants.”

“I wrote that anthem to get us through until the day we finally walked away.”

“Why did it take you years to perform it on stage?”

I rubbed my hands down her bare back before resting them in the dip where her hips met her beautiful ass. “Honestly, the song was almost too personal. We were still looking over our shoulders for him to come after us.”

Naomi sighed. “I’ve had to ask God’s forgiveness for many murderous thoughts over that man.”

I rolled over on top of her. “Is that so?” I smiled when she nodded and kissed her with all the restraint I could muster. “Well, I’m glad I don’t have to answer to the Almighty for his sins. He’s gone, and I want him to stay gone. The looking over my shoulder is done. A Jehovah’s Witness song says, ‘I’m keeping my eyes on the prize.’ The prize I’m currently eyeing is naked in my bed. Am I detecting a second wind blowing in?”

I felt her tongue snake up my throat and along my jawline. She grabbed one of my hands and sucked my fingers in her mouth. I shuddered, as her tongue delved to the juncture of my index and middle finger. She moved her hands and pulled upward on my hips.

“Oh, fuck.” I followed her directions, knowing exactly what she wanted. As I moved up her body, she kissed her way down my chest and over my abdomen until my center hovered above her. A devastating gleam stared back at me when I looked down. I’d desperately missed that stare.

Naomi grinned with pure lust in her eyes. “I’ve been waiting so long to have you exactly like this, to reclaim you in every way. To touch…”

She ran her hands over my hips and back down my ass.

“To see…”

Molten eyes devoured my sin with each gaze.

“And to taste you.”

Her lips found my flesh and sucked it into her mouth. Instinctively, my hands latched onto the rail of the headboard, knowing I needed to hold onto something solid. Fully aware of her plan from our previous years together, I knew she’d entwine her hands with mine and hold my hands behind my back on her final assault.

Her tongue licked down each side of my clit, until she darted her tongue in and out of my body. The vibration of her mouth hummed against my skin. She licked and sucked me until my legs began to quiver. I knew the minute she was ready for me to flood her mouth. She made a quick lift of her left eyebrow, and I released the headboard. She clasped my fingers in hers and crossed my hands behind my back. Her tongue glided around my clit then flicked it in rhythmic strokes until my entire body was vibrating like a guitar string. I threw my head back and arched my body, staring at the wood planks of my loft’s ceiling. My body shuddered through the strongest orgasm of my life as I screamed Naomi’s name.

I had no recollection of her laying me down and tucking me against her breast. My last conscious thought noted red digital numbers that read two thirty-seven.