They had neither spoken nor touched for two days. Every night, she would lay down in her nightdress beside him and turn away.
But what had been said needed to be said. Love.
He had no wish for her love.
Love.
He could think of nothing he wanted less.
The distance between them was so great he was not terribly surprised when she did not join him for supper. But when he found the baby wailing in his room and Penny did not come, he began to feel concerned.
The wet nurse came and looked from Camden to Lachlan.
‘Where is the lady?’
‘I’ve not seen her.’
‘It’s unusual,’ the wet nurse said, picking up the babe and putting him to her breast.
It was more than unusual. He could not imagine his wife leaving when the baby might need her.
‘See to the babe,’ he said.
He walked out of the room, and made his way down the great, long corridor, searching for Rona. ‘Where is Lady Bain?’ he asked.
‘I’ve not seen her. Not since mid-morning.’
He continued to search. Not only was there no sign of her, there was no sign of Isla, her maid. Of course, they could have gone down to the village, but Penny had not been doing so, not since the birth of the baby. And certainly not since the execution of Callum.
Something felt wrong.
Had she left him?
No. She might leave him, but she would never leave her bairn. For all that he’d said to her the child was a foundling, he did believe her when she said he was like a son of her own body. He had seen it in the way she had taken care of him. He continued to search the castle and the grounds. And he was about to carry on to the village, when he noticed a flash of blue in a thicket in the courtyard.
He made his way to the blue and what he saw made his stomach tight with dread.
Isla.
Crumpled on the ground, blood on her head.
He knelt down and could see the girl was breathing, but only just. She was unconscious. He picked her up, holding her to his chest as he carried her towards the castle. The girl was small, insubstantial, and it was no effort for him to carry her. Still, his heart was hammering, because he knew. He knew that if Isla was in such a state, then Penny was worse, or…
A great, wrenching pain nearly cleaved his chest in two.
No. He would not think of it.
He could not.
He set Isla down in the great hall. ‘Rona,’ he said. ‘We need a healer. Someone. Anyone.’
The housekeeper’s face contorted in horror and she went to her knees by Isla’s still form. ‘What happened?’
‘I don’t know.’
‘Where is Lady Bain?’
‘I don’t know that either. I’m going to trust you to make sure Isla is taken care of. But I have to go and find my wife.’
Lachlan’s sword was already strapped to his hip and he went outside, ready to give orders for his horse to be readied.
But there were men who were not present.
And his suspicions were deeply roused.
‘William,’ he said. ‘Ready my horse.’
‘Aye,’ the lad said.
He put his hand on the lad’s shoulder. ‘Where is Paden?’
‘I saw him earlier,’ he said. ‘Going into the wood.’
‘Was he alone?’ Lachlan asked.
‘Aye. But he had…he had something large concealed in a cloak. On his horse.’
Lachlan bit back a curse. ‘Be my eyes here. You report back to me anything you hear. Do not make your loyalty to me explicitly known.’
‘I think there is no chance they wouldn’t guess it,’ William said. ‘I wouldn’t be here, I wouldn’t be part of this clan if not for you.’
‘And I trust in your loyalty. But make it seem as if you might move with the wind. If it be changing.’
‘What is it you think is happening?’
‘My wife is gone. I found her maid unconscious. And Paden has vanished. I have my suspicions. But I will see them confirmed. And if I am correct, I will turn all the flowers in the courtyard red with the blood of those who dared touch my wife.’
* * *
Penny’s head ached. She could not remember what had happened. She couldn’t remember where she was. It was difficult for her to open her eyes, but when she did, she found that she couldn’t have remembered where she was, because…she had no idea. And she was certain she had not been brought here awake.
Dimly, she became aware that her feet and hands were numb. That they were tied.
She couldn’t move.
She shifted and that was when she saw him.
Paden.
‘What have you done with me?’
‘You’re awake,’ he said.
Her only response was to blink.
He made a dismissive sound. ‘You won’t be for long.’
‘What are you doing?’
‘I’ll give you no explanation. You have your part to play in it.’
And here she was, being treated like a pawn again. Bound and lying on the ground in the middle of a forest and not being told why.
Of all the things to anger her, it was a strange thing.
But that was perfect. For if he did not think that she mattered, if he did not think that she mattered or could accomplish anything, then he might let his guard down and underestimate her.
It was the look of hatred on his face that rattled her. It was savage and much more intense than anything she had seen before.
Dimly, she could remember that she and Isla had been attacked, ambushed, outside the castle. Isla…
‘What did you do to my maid?’
‘She might live,’ he said. ‘You, though, you probably won’t.’
Her heart felt torn in two. And it wasn’t even so much fear of losing her own life as it was leaving the life that she had at the castle. Camden. Lachlan.
She loved.
Whole and bright and brilliant for the first time in her life.
And it didn’t matter if Lachlan loved her back, she loved him. And she had spent the last two days withholding that from him because she was wounded. And what good had it done her? It hadn’t done her any. It was foolish. So utterly foolish.
Two days wasted when she could’ve loved him. And what had her spite been for? Trying to protect herself. Again.
Yes, he had hurt her. But he’d been trying to hurt her. He’d been trying to drive her away because it was all he knew how to do. Because he was a man who had experienced terrible pain and he hadn’t been able to break through that yet.
Apparently her own breakthrough was imperfect.
It didn’t matter. Now none of it mattered and, if she could go back and do it differently, she would. If she could go back and simply love him, with everything she had, with no thought to her own protection, then she would. Because he was the conqueror of her heart.
Joyfully. Intentionally. She had allowed him to claim her and was happier for it. Or she would’ve been, if she hadn’t been so determined to make his rejection about her.
Yes, he had tried to make it so. But he was protecting himself.
For he was not so endlessly brave as all that.
He was afraid of all that he could not control. And all the evils of the world that he could not keep at bay.
Then she had been kidnapped.
Who knew what would happen?
‘You’re using me as bait, aren’t you?’
Because if he had wanted to kill her, it would’ve been easy. But, no, he wanted to kill Lachlan. And there would be no way he could accomplish that cleanly.
‘Bait. The start of a revolution. The start of a war. If the clan believes that you have been murdered by Clan Darrach, all the better.’ A grin lifted his lips. ‘I couldn’t challenge him at the castle now, could I? And a man who has survived a decade of war would make for a terrible challenge. But if he sees his woman bound with a sword at her throat, he’ll be forced to surrender. And then, when the clan hears of your murder, of Lachlan’s…we will blame it on Clan Darrach and my path to Laird will be clear. It’s what Callum would’ve done if he could think of anyone but himself and his own prick. But, no. He was angry, but he didn’t act. If a man doesn’t like the direction his clan is going, then he should take action for himself.’
‘You’re a coward,’ she spat. ‘Not even brave enough to challenge Lachlan in a real fight. But Lachlan cares about the clan.’ Her chest went tight. ‘Above all. You’ve misjudged him.’
‘Nay, lass, I don’t think I have. And his weakness, like Callum’s, will be his end. I will take the power. And all the Laird’s money is to go to the clan. He’s willed it so.’
And then he would have it all. Lachlan’s money and power and both of them out of the way.
‘I’ll kill that bairn of yours as well,’ Paden said. A chill went down her spine. ‘Callum’s whelp. There need not be any more blood MacKenzies in the castle. No one who might challenge my claim.’
‘My husband sought to take care of the clan. And nothing else. My husband has spent his life working to get here so that he might do right for his people. You are nothing more than a self-seeking bastard.’
‘Some fine English lady you are.’
A surge of rage went through her, of power. ‘No, I’m no fine English lady. I’m Lady Penelope Bain. Of Clan MacKenzie.’
And as she lay there, her body aching, she didn’t even know what to hope for. Because if Lachlan came, then he might be killed.
But if he didn’t…then she certainly would be.
She whispered a silent prayer.
Please, if you love me, stay away.
For if he loved her…he might sacrifice for her.
He had to live. Because if he didn’t live, Camden wouldn’t live.
She needed them both to live. And this was why people feared love.
Because loving someone as much as she loved them hurt. Even while she was facing her own end, her worry was for them.
‘Don’t bother to pray for deliverance,’ Paden said. ‘It isn’t going to come.’
Despair rolled through her. But then she looked up and saw a bird on the branch of a tree, bobbing his head, hopping back and forth. An absurdly cheerful thing in the face of all this.
But it meant something.
Because it was the bird that had made her sure that Lachlan was good all those years ago. And it was the memory of that that had given her faith in him in the present.
He would come. He would come for her.
And they would triumph.
Because there was no point of the world where it could be otherwise.
Lachlan might not be able to believe in hope.
But she believed in him.
And now, that would have to be enough.