CONFUSING PARDON WITH PROBATION

2 CORINTHIANS 2:5-11

NASB

5 But if any has caused sorrow, he has caused sorrow not to me, but in some degree —[a]in order not to say too much —to all of you. 6 Sufficient for such a one is this punishment which was inflicted by the majority, 7 so that on the contrary you should rather forgive and comfort him, otherwise such a one might be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. 8 Wherefore I urge you to reaffirm your love for him. 9 For to this end also I wrote, so that I might [a]put you to the test, whether you are obedient in all things. 10 But one whom you forgive anything, I forgive also; for indeed what I have forgiven, if I have forgiven anything, I did it for your sakes in the presence of Christ, 11 so that no advantage would be taken of us by Satan, for we are not ignorant of his schemes.

2:5 [a]Lit so that I not be burdensome  2:9 [a]Lit know the proof of you 

NLT

5 I am not overstating it when I say that the man who caused all the trouble hurt all of you more than he hurt me. 6 Most of you opposed him, and that was punishment enough. 7 Now, however, it is time to forgive and comfort him. Otherwise he may be overcome by discouragement. 8 So I urge you now to reaffirm your love for him.

9 I wrote to you as I did to test you and see if you would fully comply with my instructions. 10 When you forgive this man, I forgive him, too. And when I forgive whatever needs to be forgiven, I do so with Christ’s authority for your benefit, 11 so that Satan will not outsmart us. For we are familiar with his evil schemes.

Several years ago I was thumbing through a thick section of want ads in the Los Angeles Times. That was before Google and Craigslist. Back then the closest thing to browsing the Internet was channel surfing or flipping through the newspaper, hoping something might catch your eye. So I glanced through the personal section of the want ads, hoping to find something interesting, informative, or intriguing. You’d find all sorts of odds and ends in that section: general announcements, personal messages, desperate pleas. Today, we scroll through electronic social network pages of random people we don’t know.

I came across a few lines at the bottom of a page that dripped with emotion. The words were buried in the sea of black and white, but somehow they floated from the page, catching my attention. In a little, bordered, rectangular space, these nine words appeared: “Danny, please come home. Mom and Dad forgive you.”

I read those words several times. I tried to imagine the background of Danny’s life. I pictured myself in Danny’s shoes in some distant region of that vast metropolis, discovering the words from his mom and dad that said, “We forgive you.” I imagined the heartache those anguished parents were feeling —as a parent myself, it wasn’t difficult to track their struggle. What did it take to get them to swallow their pride, their judgmental spirit, their anger and bitterness, and to say, “We forgive you”?

We have all known the joy of hearing those three words, “I forgive you.” There is nothing quite as liberating as having a full pardon granted from a parent you’ve wronged, a spouse you’ve betrayed, a friend you’ve let down . . . or the Savior you’ve disobeyed. What a cool wave of relief washes over our painful, sweltering souls when we hear those words, “I forgive you.”

So long as they are said with sincerity, that is. Sometimes people say, “I forgive you,” but they really mean, “I’ll let you back into my life under the following conditions . . .” In other words, for them, “pardon” actually means “parole.” Instead of leaving you feeling liberated, it makes you feel unsettled, watched, and distrusted.

Sadly, failure to grant forgiveness to a genuinely repentant person can lead to deep wounding, permanent scarring, and an irreparable relationship between two people. Harmonious fellowship is left hanging. This is true for interpersonal relationships, including those among believers in a church. In fact, the Christians in Corinth struggled with this very issue, as one of their festering, unresolved conflicts was leading to painful schism in the body of Christ.

— 2:5-6 —

The background to the lingering problem behind Paul’s admonitions in 2 Corinthians 2:5-11 is most likely found in 1 Corinthians 5, where Paul confronted the Christians in Corinth about a very specific form of sexual immorality they were condoning under the banner of “grace.” One of the members of the church was engaged in an ongoing incestuous relationship with his stepmother (1 Cor. 5:1) —a sin not even their pagan neighbors would have tolerated! Because they had refused to take disciplinary action against this infectious disease of immorality, Paul instructed them to clean house (1 Cor. 5:6-7), removing the immoral man from their midst as an act of discipline (1 Cor. 5:11-13).

Somewhere between 1 Corinthians and 2 Corinthians, however, perhaps in response to Paul’s second “tearful letter” (2 Cor. 2:4), some in the church must have taken Paul’s firm instructions as a warrant not only for immediate and decisive action against the perpetrator, but as permission for strong, even humiliating treatment. The Corinthians had first erred on one extreme by proudly condoning the immorality with a complete lack of remorse. Now the pendulum seems to have swung to the opposite error: an arrogant condemnation of the immoral person, even though he had sincerely repented and sought reconciliation!

Even if Paul has in mind a destructive sinner other than the man referenced in 1 Corinthians 5:1-13, the key element of the situation that the apostle addresses is clear: A sinning man had been severely and sufficiently disciplined by the church, resulting in his repentance. Instead of forgiving him, however, they kept him at arm’s length. Instead of extending him gracious pardon, they put him on graceless probation. Paul acknowledges that the sinner had caused sorrow not only to Paul, but also to the whole congregation (2 Cor. 2:5). Yet Paul suggests the punishment he had already endured from the majority in the church is “sufficient” for his particular actions (2:6).

— 2:7-9 —

How hard it is for some believers to accept the repentance of a fellow believer who has caused them harm, even after that person has endured the discipline that was due the sin and has been restored to spiritual health and fellowship. The memories of that sin can continue to prompt unwarranted distrust, unreasonable fear, and a lingering bitterness. But these things —contrary to love and grace —have nothing to do with authentic forgiveness.

Admittedly, some serious offenses and addictions require the body of Christ to suspend some repentant believers from full participation in church ministry and service. In fact, criminal offenses could very well lead to further consequences well beyond the control of the church. Nevertheless, when the church approaches each case with the goal of forgiveness and reconciliation, hope for recovery can be found in even the most bleak of circumstances. In every case, wisdom and prudence —along with love and grace —are needed.

However, the man in Corinth who had caused such trouble no longer needed discipline; he needed forgiveness. Notice the process that had already played out, up to the time when Paul wrote this letter:

Such signs of authentic remorse and contrition should have inspired the church’s forgiveness, comfort, and love (2:7-8). Yet at this crucial stage, the process of reconciliation broke down.

Whereas in his previous letter Paul virtually had to force the church to act against the sinner, in this letter he finds himself in the ironic position of serving as the sinner’s advocate. How baffling the Corinthian church must have been! That chaotic church had pushed Paul from executing the prosecution to coming to the sinner’s defense. To prevent the repentant brother in Christ from being “overwhelmed by excessive sorrow” (2:7), Paul exhorted the Corinthians to “forgive and comfort him” (2:7) and to “reaffirm [their] love for him” (2:8).

I’m sure Paul was aware of the surprising nature of this new admonition. In one letter he ordered that the sinner be removed from their midst, posthaste. Now he was commanding them to readmit him without delay or reservation. The circumstances had clearly changed, requiring a change in response that the Corinthians seemed reluctant to make. Paul’s new apostolic decree may not have made sense to those wielding the exacting gavel of judgment in Corinth. In fact, it may even have come as an embarrassment to them. I can imagine some in the church saying, “Okay, I think we’ve punished him enough. He’s sincerely sorry and wants to be restored. I’m sure Paul would have wanted to bring about reconciliation.” On the other hand, those overzealous for church purity may have responded, “No! Paul told us to clean out the leaven, so that’s what we’re doing! The decision is final. This guilty sinner had his chance. If Paul were here, he’d agree with us!”

Then 2 Corinthians arrives, and to some in Corinth, Paul’s instructions may have appeared to reveal a flip-flop in his attitude, even though it was completely consistent with his principles of church discipline as a means toward reconciliation, not condemnation. Paul’s new instruction, then, becomes itself a test to see if the Corinthians will be “obedient in all things” (2:9) —even in commands that don’t seem to make a lot of sense to the church and may even appear on the surface to contradict his earlier policy of discipline.

— 2:10-11 —

Paul then presents his own forgiving attitude and actions as an example to emulate (2:10). As their father in the faith, Paul assures them that his own policy of forgiveness for the truly repentant should give them confidence that when they act with the same spirit of grace and mercy, he will have their back. Forgiveness, like discipline, is not self-seeking. In fact, it can be downright difficult. Nevertheless, Paul tells the Corinthians that his pattern of forgiveness is “for your sakes in the presence of Christ,” not for his own personal gain.

Why is full and prompt forgiveness so important? Why not make the repentant sinner squirm a little to show how much others have suffered because of the sin? Why not let the repentant individual wallow just a little longer in uncertainty and experience anguish in alienation as a deterrent from ever making that same mistake again? Because withholding forgiveness gives Satan an opportunity to take advantage of us (2:11).

This is one of the strongest warnings in all of Paul’s letters. The phrase “by Satan” suggests that the devil slithers his way into a situation in which an individual or church refuses to extend full pardon to truly repentant sinners. If the process of reconciliation breaks down, then the insidious demon finds his way in to further sabotage the machine. But when the process of reconciliation is oiled by mercy and grace, neither the devil nor his demons will have opportunity to stir up resentment, anguish, sorrow, bitterness, rebellion, and schism.

Satan’s evil “schemes” and conniving plans involve deception and destruction. In the case of the Corinthians, the adversary had deceived them into thinking that church discipline is all judgment and no mercy, all punishment and no grace. God’s goal is not ridding the church of sinners, but reconciling sinners back to the church. When we forget that, we are no longer pursuing the Lord’s will, but rather the devil’s wiles.

APPLICATION: 2 CORINTHIANS 2:5-11

Pardon, not Parole

Paul’s correction of the pendulum-swinging Corinthians can be summed up in one simple sentence that we would all do well to memorize: “Our forgiveness should be as swift as our discipline was severe.” This applies to forgiveness among friendships, marriage-and-family relationships, and church membership. As we glance back at Paul’s admonition to the believers in Corinth, we can see three practical principles regarding Christlike forgiveness that we all must take to heart and never forget.

First, true repentance calls for immediate and full forgiveness. I’m not talking about hasty forgiveness based on cheap repentance in the form of a flippant “Hey, I’m sorry!” or a coerced confession. I’m talking about true repentance —the kind you can see in their eyes, hear in their tone of voice, sense in their personal brokenness. When a person’s heart is pierced by genuine conviction, the sense of shame and unworthiness can be almost overwhelming. It is also obvious. The prodigal son wanted to come back home as a servant rather than as a son (Luke 15:18-19). Those of us who have been injured or offended by the sinner’s actions might be tempted to take the penitent individual up on the offer, but we need to resist this. The body of Christ has no probation period for genuinely repentant sinners. True repentance —heartfelt, not a shallow imitation —calls for restoration and celebration.

Second, full forgiveness is demonstrative, not theoretical. It is not something we think or feel, but something we do. Remember the commands in 2 Corinthians 2:7-8? They were to “forgive,” “comfort,” and “reaffirm.” We forgive when we speak words of liberation to the offending party: “I forgive you. We are putting this behind us and moving on.” We comfort when we come alongside those who offended us, not only forgiving them for their wrongs, but offering to help them rebuild and strengthen areas of weakness. We reaffirm when we restore them to their former level of relationship, inviting and involving them in our lives, trusting them with the rights and privileges they had before. Of course, every time we forgive like this, we risk. They may fail us again. We may place our trust on an unreliable soul. But that’s grace. Grace is risky.

Third, to hold back forgiveness invites trouble from the adversary. When you refuse to forgive a genuinely repentant sinner, that person can stumble onto a downward spiral: Overwhelming sorrow leads to confusion, fruitlessness, and doubts about their standing before God. This can lead to unbiblical approaches to the Christian life: “What must I do to redeem myself from this? How can I improve myself to be acceptable to others and to the Lord?” Ultimately, frustration and bitterness set in. If that’s not a path paved by the adversary, I don’t know what is.

Are you holding a grudge? Are you holding something over somebody who has harmed you in the past, but who has genuinely repented? If so, you need to cancel the debt immediately, express your unconditional forgiveness, and begin restoring that relationship.

Is there somebody today who needs to hear and feel your forgiveness, comfort, and reaffirmation? What is preventing you from reaching out and touching that person with healing mercy and grace?

Are your unforgiving attitudes toward somebody resulting in their exasperation or desperation? Are they obsessed with gaining your approval? This may be a child, a spouse, or even a parent. You need to release them so they will not become a target for Satan’s twisted temptations.