Lottie repeated this sentiment when the two ladies retired to the drawing room after dinner.
‘Tony will be glad not to lose Quinn’s company. They have been friends for ever, you know, and went to the same school. It might even be said they grew up together.’
‘Oh?’ Serena was puzzled. ‘I thought Quinn’s family preferred houses where they might entertain in style.’
‘They did.’ Lottie sat down on the sofa and patted the seat, inviting Serena to join her. ‘However, they left Quinn in Hertfordshire for most of the year, until he was old enough to go to school.’
‘Ah, poor boy!’
‘Quite.’ Lottie’s cheerful face showed uncharacteristic disapproval. ‘Fortunately, Tony’s family is an ancient one and Lord and Lady Quinn considered him a suitable companion, so Quinn spent a great deal of his time here at Prior’s Holt.’
Serena shifted in her seat. ‘Perhaps you should not be telling me this, if your husband told you in confidence.’
‘No, no, my family lived nearby, you see, and most of it is common knowledge locally. But if you would rather not hear any more—’
‘On the contrary,’ Serena assured her. ‘I would like to know as much as possible. Everything. It might help me to be a better wife.’ She flushed. ‘You are aware that the circumstances of our marriage are somewhat...unusual.’
Lottie gave her a speaking look and reached across to squeeze her hand.
She continued, ‘Quinn received a great deal more affection here than from his own parents. It came as no surprise when he offered for Tony’s sister.’
‘Ah.’ Quinn’s words came back to Serena. ‘She died, I believe?’
‘Yes. Poor Barbara. Such a lively girl. She was barely a year younger than Quinn and they were inseparable. They wanted to marry once she reached eighteen but Quinn’s parents refused to countenance a match. They had selected a viscount’s daughter for his bride. Quinn stood firm, though. He and Barbara were engaged as soon as he reached his majority.’ She spread her hands and gave a loud sigh. ‘Barbara went off to town to purchase her bride clothes and contracted a fever while she was there. She was dead within the month. Poor Quinn—he loved her so much. He has hated London ever since and rarely goes into society.’
Lottie paused and Serena could think of nothing to say to fill the silence. She knew what it was like to be brought up by nannies and tutors, and her heart went out to the lonely child Quinn had been. And then how devastating to lose the love of his life so cruelly.
‘But that is all changed now.’ Lottie gave herself a little shake, throwing off the melancholy thoughts. ‘We always hoped Quinn would find someone else to make him happy.’
‘You mistake,’ stammered Serena. ‘It is n-not a love match.’
‘Not yet, but you are so beautiful I have no doubt he will soon fall in love with you,’ replied Lottie comfortably. ‘Tell me, is there any indication that you might be in an interesting state? Oh, now I have made you blush! Pray forgive me, Serena. I should not be asking such questions, should I? Tony is always chiding me for being far too forward.’
‘No, no, I am not offended, but, no, I am n-not with child...’
Lottie reached out and caught her hands. ‘Do not worry, my dear, there is plenty of time. Your marriage is very young yet.’
Serena murmured her agreement and sought for a way to turn the conversation away from her marriage.
‘Do you have children, Lady Beckford?’
‘Call me Lottie, my dear, I pray you.’ She smiled, but a shadow passed across her face. ‘Alas, no. I suffered an illness in the early years of our marriage, you see, which has left my heart weak. We have consulted the best doctors in the land but they are all agreed that it would be unwise for me to bear a child.’
‘Oh, I am sorry.’
‘Do not be. Tony and I came to terms with the fact long ago and have a very happy life, I assure you.’ She gave Serena a quick, mischievous look. ‘And I hope you will make us godparents to your own children, that we may spoil them quite shamelessly!’
Serena wondered what Lottie would say if she knew that the marriage was not even consummated, but she summoned up a laugh, determined her new friend should not suspect there was anything amiss. However, it was with relief that she heard the door open and the gentlemen came in, putting an end to further confidences.
* * *
Quinn followed his host into the drawing room and his eyes went immediately to Serena. He thought how good it was to hear her laugh, but when he drew closer he saw that the merriment did not reach her eyes and he was surprised how much that disturbed him. How much he wanted to make her happy.
He gave her a small, reassuring smile and lowered himself into a chair near the empty fireplace, where he could watch her. There was no doubt she was beautiful, with her golden curls, chocolate-coloured eyes and her serene smile, but she had a distant, detached air and he was haunted by the memory of the first time he had seen her, full of energy, her eyes sparking fire at him.
‘What say you, Quinn?’ Tony’s voice jolted him back to the present.
‘I beg your pardon, what was that?’
‘You know we always hold a ball every summer, but this year Lottie deliberately delayed until you returned, because she wants to introduce your new bride to the neighbourhood. It will not be a very large affair, mainly local families, although we have invited some of our friends from town, those who have not gone off to Brighton for the summer.’
From across the room Lottie wagged her finger at Quinn. ‘You have refused my invitations thus far, my lord, but you cannot do so this time.’
‘Indeed, I cannot. If my wife wishes to attend then we shall do so.’ He looked a question at Serena.
‘Of course. We are delighted to accept.’
Was he the only one to notice the lack of enthusiasm in her response? She wanted company no more than he. In that, at least, they were in accord.
* * *
The drive back to Melham Court was accomplished in silence. It was impossible to pierce the darkness, but Serena was aware of Quinn’s abstraction. Prior’s Holt was the home of his lost love. Did visiting there remind him of Barbara? She could not ask him such a question, but she longed to reach out for his hand, to comfort him and take comfort in return. Instead they remained in their separate corners for the journey.
‘It has been a tiring evening,’ Quinn remarked as he handed her out of the carriage. ‘Shall I escort you directly to your room?’
‘Yes, thank you.’ As they made their way up the stairs she asked him a question that had been teasing her. ‘Would you rather we did not go to Lady Beckford’s ball?’
‘By no means. You know I am not fond of such events, but I think it is necessary that we go to this, do not you?’
‘Why yes, I do.’ She risked a tiny smile. ‘I have no doubt your neighbours will be agog to see your new bride.’
‘They will indeed.’ They had reached the door of her chamber and he stopped. ‘We shall at some point be obliged to hold something similar here, but this will relieve you of the necessity of planning anything of that nature just yet.’
‘Oh?’ Her head came up. ‘Do you think I could not do it?’
‘I am sure you could, but I would like you to take your time to settle into your new home.’
He raised her hand to his lips, murmured goodnight and walked away, leaving Serena to enter her chamber where she found Polly dozing in a chair.
‘Oh, lawks, my lady, I beg your pardon. I tried so hard to stay awake.’
She waved away the maid’s apologies. ‘I see no reason why you should not rest while you wait for me.’
Polly bustled around, helping her into her nightgown, and Serena allowed her thoughts to wander. She was disappointed at the little spurt of anger that had caused her to challenge Quinn like that, for she had resolved to maintain an attitude of quiet obedience towards her husband. After all, he had rescued her from a shameful escapade and deserved nothing less than a conformable wife, as Dorothea had pointed out to her constantly in the days leading up to the wedding.
‘It was your wilfulness that brought you to this pass, Serena. You must curb that headstrong nature of yours. No man wants to be married to a termagant!’
‘Would you like me to stay and brush out your curls, ma’am?’
‘Thank you, Polly, but I can do that. Off you go to bed now.’
When the maid had gone, Serena sat at her dressing table and pulled the brush slowly through her hair. Day and night her sister-in-law’s words ran through her head, a never-ending litany. Since the wedding she had tried to be a model wife and Quinn appeared quite content. Certainly, he had made no physical demands upon her. Apart from that one kiss, on their wedding day.
It was seared in her memory, the feel of his lips on hers, the sudden scorching desire that had shocked her to the core. She had run away from him then and he had made no effort to detain her, or to kiss her again. He was unfailingly polite and considerate, but it appeared that Quinn did not want her, termagant or no.
* * *
A week later they were back at Prior’s Holt for the Beckfords’ ball. It was their first formal engagement and a little shiver ran down Serena’s back as the liveried servant announced them. Lord and Lady Quinn. There was no going back now.
Quinn put his hand over her fingers, where they rested on his arm.
‘Nervous?’
She glanced up at him. She had prepared carefully for the evening, choosing to wear once more the gown she had worn on her wedding day. The cream muslin was decorated at the neck, sleeves and hem with delicately embroidered apricot flowers and a tracery of leaves, all enhanced by silver thread work. She had allowed Polly to nestle matching roses among her curls and had put on the diamond ear drops and necklace that Quinn had given her as a wedding gift. In looks at least she hoped she would not disappoint.
‘I trust I shall not let you down, my lord.’
He squeezed her hand. ‘You could never do that, Serena.’
She straightened her shoulders and raised her head. She had little interest in what anyone thought of her, but this was Quinn’s neighbourhood and she wanted to make a good impression, for his sake.
Lottie came forward to greet them, Tony only a step behind. Serena was enveloped in a warm, scented embrace before her hostess carried her away, bent upon introducing the new bride to as many people as possible before the dancing began.
‘I am so glad you did not come fashionably late,’ she said, linking arms with Serena. ‘The dancing will not commence for an hour yet, so we have plenty of time for introductions. You will be acquainted with most of our guests from town, I am sure. Indeed, one is a close friend of yours, I believe. But our near neighbours are all impatient to meet you.’
‘Should we not wait for my husband?’ asked Serena, hanging back.
Lottie gave a little laugh. ‘You must not worry about Quinn. He is the most unsociable man I know and would not enjoy doing the pretty. Much better to leave him with Tony. Now, let me see, who shall be first? Let us begin with Sir Grinwald and Lady Brook, the local magistrate and his wife...’
Time passed in a whirl of new names and faces for Serena. She was aware that behind the polite greetings and questions, Lottie’s guests were all very curious. As Sir Grinwald put it, most improperly, they wanted to know what had made the old dog put his head in the parson’s mousetrap at last. For the first time she was grateful that Dorothea had insisted she should be well versed in the social graces. Now that training came to her aid. She smiled and talked, responding to compliments and turning off sly questions about married life with an elegant riposte.
Everyone was charming, but Serena was not fooled. Quinn’s immediate neighbours were genuinely welcoming, but she detected a coolness in those who mixed more in London society. They had heard the rumours and were reserving judgement upon the new Lady Quinn.
There was only one awkward moment. Lottie was glancing about her, wondering who next should be presented to the new bride, when Serena spotted Mrs Downing across the room, accompanied by her son and daughter. Shock held her motionless, then she recalled Lottie’s words about the guests here tonight: one is a close friend of yours. She meant Elizabeth, of course.
How wrong Lottie was to think they could still be friends, thought Serena, wretchedly. She was not aware of holding her breath, until Lottie tugged her arm and led her off to introduce her to an elderly couple who were near neighbours. It was only then she realised how relieved she was that she need not face the Downings. Not yet.
* * *
‘Well, it is going very well,’ announced Lottie at last. ‘Now let us go through to the ballroom, for that scraping of fiddles tells me the musicians are ready to strike up. To whom shall we allow the honour of the first dance with you, I wonder?’
‘No one.’ Quinn appeared, his large frame blocking their way. ‘You have done quite enough for now, Lottie. I have come to claim my bride for the first two dances.’
His manner brooked no argument and with no more than a half-hearted pout, their hostess stood aside.
‘Very well, my lord, I suppose you may do so, if you wish.’
‘I do wish it.’ He held out his hand to Serena. ‘Come along, madam.’
Lottie’s eyes widened at his peremptory tone and she shot one final, mischievous glance at Serena before walking away.
‘Was I impolite?’ he muttered, as he escorted Serena on to the dance floor.
‘Exceedingly,’ she responded. ‘But I am very glad you came for me. My head is spinning from so many introductions. It will be a relief to dance with you.’
‘You may quickly change your mind on that,’ he warned her. ‘I am sadly out of practice.’
But when the dance started Serena discovered that her husband was an excellent dancer. For such a big man he was very light on his feet and moved through the dance with the lithe grace of a wild animal. Not a bear at all, she thought. A big cat. Powerful. Agile. Dangerous.
As he clasped her hand for the promenade she missed her step and immediately his hold tightened, steadying her. She looked up to convey her thanks, but all thought of gratitude faded under the blaze of possession she saw in his eyes. For an instant the heaviness that constantly overlaid her spirits was pierced, like sunshine breaking through rainclouds.
The carefree girl she had been would have revelled in that look. The old Serena would have agreed to accompany him on any adventure, stand shoulder to shoulder with him to face any danger. No. She dragged her eyes away. That wilful creature was no more. She would be a good wife who would cause him no trouble.
* * *
Who would have thought a dance could be so pleasurable? As Quinn turned, circled and promenaded with Serena he knew he had never enjoyed a dance more. True, his partner was extremely beautiful and at least half the men in the room envied him his place with her, but that did not matter. If they had been alone in the ballroom he would have been just as happy. He felt an overriding urge to protect her and when she stumbled he was ready, his grip sure, supporting her. Even such a small service gave him a rush of pleasure, heightened by the grateful look she threw at him. It was a fleeting glance and disappointment stabbed him when she looked away.
The two dances were over all too soon and even as they left the floor Lottie was waiting for them, Serena’s next partner at her side. At least it was Atherton, Quinn thought grimly. Fifty, if he was a day, and happily married. Quinn made his way to the card room, knowing that if he remained in the ballroom he would be obliged to dance, and how could he give his attention to his partner while Serena was dancing with another man?
However, he soon discovered that even cards could not hold his attention. The music was audible from the card room and when he heard a new tune he wondered who was now dancing with Serena. Was it another elderly neighbour, or some young buck intent upon flirtation?
‘Come along, my lord, we are waiting for you.’
The jovial voice of a fellow player cut through Quinn’s thoughts and he selected his discard. It was quickly swept up by his neighbour, who gave a triumphant cry and displayed his winning hand. Quinn felt a touch on his shoulder and looked round to find Tony beside him.
‘Not like you to make such an error.’
‘No.’ Quinn threw in his hand and rose from the table. ‘I am playing abominably tonight. Let us return to the ballroom. I want to see how my wife does.’
‘Serena is doing very well, my friend, trust me.’
‘I should still like to see for myself.’
‘No doubt you intend to stand, brooding, at the side of the room and watch her like a lovesick moonling?’ Tony laughed. ‘Lottie would never allow that.’
‘Is it any wonder I never attend these dashed events?’ muttered Quinn, scowling.
Tony grinned. ‘You will have to accustom yourself to this sort of thing, now you are married. Unless you are prepared to dance with one or other of the ladies present, you had best come to the library with me, out of the way.’ When Quinn hesitated he added quietly, ‘You may safely leave Lottie to look after your wife, old friend.’
They went across the hall to the study, where a decanter and glasses stood on the desk.
‘This is my bolthole,’ explained Tony. ‘I always find time to slip away here for a while. Of course, I must not be absent for too long or I shall incur Lottie’s wrath, but one is rarely missed for the odd half-hour. Sit down and I will bring you a glass of wine. I had it fetched from Averys in Bristol, as you suggested. I believe it was worth the longer journey.’
Two wing chairs flanked the empty hearth. Quinn lowered himself into one and for a while silence reigned.
‘So, my friend, what is your opinion of married life?’
Quinn studied his glass. ‘It is not uncomfortable. Serena and I find we have much in common.’
‘I am glad to hear it. And when do you go to town?’
‘We do not.’
‘Oh? You are still recovering perhaps from your jauntering all over the country. But once you are rested you will be hiring a house in town, I am sure.’
‘We have no plans to visit London.’ Quinn glanced up. ‘That surprises you? I do not see why it should. Neither Serena nor I wish for society. You are aware of the circumstances of our marriage, the rumours and gossip. I would not ask my wife to face that.’
Tony hesitated, ‘It might be better to face it now than have people say your wife is in hiding.’
Quinn frowned. ‘They would not dare.’
‘Not in your presence, certainly, but there are rumours about why you married her.’ Tony coughed. ‘Some might think you are ashamed of your bride.’
‘Ashamed! No, indeed, quite the contrary. Serena is not only beautiful but intelligent, too, and well educated.’ He sat forward, grinning. ‘If you could have seen her at Worthing, Tony, when we were staying with the Youngs. She is well read and has an enquiring mind. She knows enough about Egyptology to put some pertinent questions to Thomas. He was most impressed and has invited us to attend his next lectures.’
‘That will mean going to London.’
‘Yes, but we will not stay more than a night or two, as I have done in the past. We need not go into society.’
‘You would turn Serena into a recluse like yourself.’ Tony’s countenance was unusually solemn. ‘We were not acquainted with Serena when she was Miss Russington, but one saw her everywhere and could not fail to notice her. Oh, it was nothing detrimental, my friend, so you need not show hackle! She had a reputation as a cheerful, spirited young lady who could be relied upon to bring life to the dullest party. Lottie tells me her admirers swore she could light up a room.’
‘Could she?’ Quinn thought of the first time he had seen Serena, fire in her eyes and an angry flush upon her cheek. Had that fire been extinguished, or was it merely damped down?
‘Her family kept her pretty well hedged about, of course,’ Tony continued. ‘But that is understandable, given her history.’
‘They stifled her,’ said Quinn. ‘If Hambridge and his wife had not tried to clip her wings she would not have felt it necessary to give them the slip.’
‘But that is just it, my friend. She may not have intended any harm, but there is no denying she did go off unescorted.’
‘Marriage should have reinstated her.’
‘I’m afraid not.’ Tony fixed his eyes on Quinn. ‘It has only given credence to Forsbrook’s claim that she left him when a more attractive proposition presented itself.’
Quinn jumped to his feet, cursing roundly. He strode up and down the room, his brow furrowed.
‘I had hoped that particular story had been forgotten.’
‘It might have been, if Forsbrook wasn’t back in town and presenting himself as the injured party. The thing is,’ Tony went on slowly, ‘there are some who say that Serena is following in her mother’s footsteps.’
‘The devil they are! Then I must deal with Forsbrook once and for all!’
‘Call him out? That would only add fuel to the fire.’
Quinn stopped pacing and ran a hand over his face. ‘Then what do you suggest I do to protect my wife?’
‘It strikes me that you have two options. You could keep Serena from town and make a pleasant enough life for yourself in the provinces.’
‘As you said earlier, turn her into a recluse, like myself.’ Quinn met his friend’s eyes steadily. ‘And the second option?’
‘Take her to London, face down the gossips. Serena has been used to town life—parties, concerts, the theatre, debating societies—you, too, once enjoyed those things.’ He grinned suddenly. ‘Not so much the parties, perhaps, where you were surrounded by flatterers and matchmaking mamas, but the rest of it.’ Tony pushed himself out of his chair and stood before Quinn, one hand resting on his shoulder. ‘You have shut yourself away since Barbara died. Society is not all bad, my friend. Perhaps it is time you started living again.’ He glanced at the ormolu clock on the mantelshelf as it chimed the half-hour. ‘Our guests will be going into supper shortly. We should join our wives.’
* * *
Since when had dancing become a chore? Serena kept her smile in place as she went down the dance with her latest partner. Sir Grinwald was not only the local magistrate but also one of Quinn’s closest neighbours. He was a kindly gentleman and she could not blame him if she was not enjoying herself. She could not blame any of her partners. It was just that she did not feel anything tonight.
No, she corrected herself, that was not quite true. She had felt something when she danced with Quinn. A certain frisson, a little thrill of excitement.
The sort of thing I was seeking in a husband.
The thought brought a little flush of remorse to her cheeks as she recalled how reckless she had been. But no more. In future she would be the very model of decorum. The music ended and Sir Grinwald led her off the floor to where his wife was waiting.
‘I must find Lady Beckford,’ said Serena. ‘She seems determined that I should dance all evening.’
‘And why not?’ declared Lady Brook, beaming at her. ‘You young things have so much energy.’
Serena merely smiled. Such kind people would be hurt if they knew how little she wanted to be here. She turned away, her smile faltering as she found herself face to face with Miss Elizabeth Downing.