THE EXTREMELY SHORT TRIAL OF THE TWO PRANK KiNGS
When Frankie opened his eyes, he could hardly believe them.
The entire front area of the library, including the loans desk and the Book Week display, was covered in white powder.
‘I am going to ask you one last time,’ Saint Lou said in the most serious of all her serious voices. She looked very upset. ‘Did you do this?’
‘Why would I want to make the library look like it’s covered in snow?’ Frankie said. It didn’t help Frankie’s plea of innocence that Drew started giggling. ‘I didn’t do it, Lou. Not that you’ll believe me.’
Saint Lou looked hurt. ‘Why do you always think the worst of me, Frankie? All I ever do is stick up for you and get you out of trouble. But you’re never even a bit grateful. Just yesterday when you put salt in the sugar bowl I convinced Dad that salty coffee was trending right now, and that he was officially a hipster. But did you say thanks? No – you just called me a goody-goody.’
Frankie glared at her. ‘That’s because you are one! You only do stuff like that so that you end up looking better than me.’
Lou’s expression rapidly changed from upset to angry. Not just a little bit angry, either. She looked angrier than a hornet with a headache at a bongo festival.
‘You don’t know me at all, Frankie Fish!’ Lou snapped. ‘And I bet you did do the flour prank – because you know how much I love the library and you wanted to upset me!’
Frankie gaped at his sister. He’d never heard her speak like this before. Suddenly, the library was even quieter than it usually was, which is truly saying something because Miss Davis was very strict on silent reading time. Two of the Mosley triplets had once been thrown out because their tummies were rumbling. At least, Miss Davis had hoped it was their tummies.
Lou pulled the Sonic Suitcase from the mound of flour it had landed in. Her face was dark with fury.
‘Would you like me to take that?’ Frankie offered, in his best attempt at chivalry. He had the feeling he’d pushed his saintly sister a bit too far.
‘No, I’ll take care of it,’ replied Saint Lou curtly as she headed for the exit. ‘I’m sorry, but you’ve left me no choice.’
Frankie didn’t know what to say. He could tell Lou was really out of sorts because she wasn’t cleaning up the flour in her usual saintly manner, but the words to fix the situation just wouldn’t come to him. All he could muster was, ‘I’ll see you tonight at Nanna’s for dinner, yeah? Four-thirty sharp.’
(Nanna’s dinners were getting earlier and earlier. Frankie was convinced her dinner and lunch would cross over soon, and if she had breakfast any earlier than she already did, it would be more like a midnight snack.)
‘Yes, of course I’ll be there,’ Lou answered through gritted teeth before adding, ‘a goody-two-shoes wouldn’t go back on a promise, would she?’ Then she left the library, slamming the door behind her.
Drew looked at Frankie in concern. ‘What do you think she meant,’ said Drew slowly, ‘by you’ve left me no choice?’
‘I don’t know,’ admitted Frankie. ‘But this is Saint Lou we’re talking about. She wouldn’t do anything too terrible, would she?’
Still, a nervous feeling planted itself inside Frankie’s chest.
The rest of the school day went like most others, but with one big difference: for once, everyone was talking about the library. Rumours of what had led to Miss Davis’s surprise quitting swirled across St Monica’s like leaves chased by a leaf blower.
Within an hour, absolutely EVERYONE had heard about the flour-on-the-library-fan prank. Including the former groundskeeper, Old Man Harris, and he’d been retired for months.
‘It was definitely Fish Guts and Bird Brain who did it,’ declared Lisa Chadwick, the teacher’s pet. ‘It’s exactly the sort of dumb stunt they love to pull.’
This particular rumour quickly gathered power after the boys were called into Principal Dawson’s office for questioning. Frankie wasn’t worried, though. He was absolutely certain Principal Dawson would agree that everybody is innocent until proven guilty.
Frankie was wrong.
‘Why? Why did you do this?!’ the fuming principal screamed, before Frankie's and Drew’s butts had even touched the office chairs.
‘It wasn’t us!’ protested Drew.
‘Of course it was you!’ Principal Dawson shouted. ‘This has Fish and Bird written all over it. You still have flour behind your ears, for Pete’s sake!’
‘Well, we were in the library shortly after it happened –’ admitted Drew.
‘But we swear we didn’t do it!’ Frankie pleaded.
‘Then who did?’ asked Principal Dawson, folding his arms and leaning back in his chair. As far as he was concerned, the case was closed.
‘It’s obvious, isn’t it?’ Drew asked. ‘The Mosley triplets. They’re always doing pranks around here!’
‘That’s right!’ agreed Frankie. ‘And one of them, I don’t know which one, was kicked out of the library last week for burping into all the Twilight books. He was probably out for revenge.’
It felt a bit mean to pass the blame onto the Mosley triplets, but the explanation did make perfect sense. Frankie and Drew sat back in their seats with relief, before sneaking a little fist bump. But their relief was short-lived.
‘Nice try, but they have watertight alibis,’ Principal Dawson shot back. ‘They were picking up litter for Miss Merryweather after disrupting her class with vulgar noises from their armpits … at least we hope it was from their armpits.’
Frankie and Drew’s defence had been dealt a cruel blow. Because who, besides the Mosley triplets, would be capable of pulling off a trick like that?
‘Speaking of alibis,’ continued Principal Dawson, ‘what are yours? It’s a bit of a coincidence that you arrived at the library moments after the incident, isn’t it? Where were you before that?’
Frankie looked at Drew in dismay. It wasn’t like they could say, ‘Well, we were time-travelling in the Cretaceous era when Drew hit a T-Rex with his hacky sack.’
So Frankie blurted out the only thing he could think of. ‘Um … I forget?’
Principal Dawson shook his head smugly. ‘Nice try,’ he said. ‘Get back to class now, boys. You’ll find out your punishment first thing tomorrow.’
As Frankie closed the office door behind him, Principal Dawson added, ‘Oh, and Frankie, please tell your sister I hope she is feeling better. Miss Davis’s resignation has really shaken her up. It’s the first time she has EVER left school early.’
Frankie gulped and nodded. Inside, he felt wobblier than half-set jelly on a roller-coaster.
On the way back to their classroom, Frankie said, ‘Do you have the same bad feeling about this that I do, Drew?’
‘Yep,’ Drew nodded. ‘Your sister looked really mad when she grabbed the Sonic Suitcase. And now we find out she’s gone home sick. You don’t think she’s planning to destroy the suitcase, do you?’
Frankie really wasn’t sure. Lou had been a great addition to the Sonic Suitcase team, but he’d never been completely convinced that she approved of the whole time-travel operation. There was always the risk that things would go wrong and they would end up altering history.
Frankie half-thought that the only reason Lou was involved at all was to keep an eye on him … and spoil his fun whenever possible. As for all the gadgets she’d invented, well – that was probably just so she could prove how much smarter she was than anyone else.
One thing was clear: Lou was up to something NOT good. After all, the last time Frankie had heard someone say ‘you’ve left me no choice’ was just before his dad gave their entire frisbee collection to the Red Cross.
Still, Frankie shook his head. ‘Don’t worry,’ he said. ‘Lou won’t do anything to the suitcase. She hates destruction. It takes her about an hour to unwrap a present because she doesn’t want to wreck the paper.’
As the boys turned a corner, they were met by Lisa Chadwick. Lisa was still pretty sore about losing the Halloween Parade contest to Frankie. She appeared to be enjoying the downfall of St Monica’s infamous prank kings the way rats enjoy a janitors’ strike on Pizza Day.
‘I always knew this day would come!’ she gloated, doing her famous ponytail swish. ‘Fish Guts and Bird Brain busted at last – this time hopefully for good.’
Usually, Frankie would think of a witty remark to counter Lisa Chadwick’s overbearing passive-aggression (which was becoming less passive and more aggressive by the day), but right now he had bigger problems on his mind.
As Lisa flounced away down the hall, Frankie turned to his best mate. ‘We’ve got to figure out who pulled that prank, Drew,’ he fumed. ‘Or else we’re in BIG trouble!’
