EMBRACE THE MAGIC OF DECLUTTERING

SEVERAL OF THE experts I spoke with in other chapters have already talked about the magic of cleaning out our physical space as a means of clearing the mind, but there’s a reason I’m devoting an entire chapter to this topic: it freaking works.

If you’ve never tried this one, put it on your must-do list. By cleaning up and organizing our physical surroundings, it makes space for things we want to welcome into our life and helps us be in a more clearheaded mind-set to receive them.

As Karen Noé spoke about in the chapter about cleansing rituals, getting rid of things we no longer need and want is a healthy sign that we’re ready to move on to a new phase. Feeling like we have more physical space can also help us feel less stressed out if we struggle with feeling stuck or stagnant or claustrophobic in a current pattern.

Whenever my clients tell me their weekend plans include cleaning out their closet, or doing a deep clean of their apartment, I can tell they’re making meaningful progress with settling into a healthier new pattern. That could be something like getting rid of clothes that don’t fit or that they don’t feel great in, or as one of my clients did, turning a cluttered guest room into a retreat where she could journal and meditate and stream yoga classes on her laptop!

Sometimes the act of letting go of physical stuff can ease us into important transitions. Over the years, I’ve noticed in my own life that big shifts happen in my love life when I empty out shelves and drawers and dust under the bed.

Years ago, for example, I was living with a boyfriend in midtown Manhattan. Our lease was going to be up in July, and we lived in a part of town that had started to feel chaotic and cramped, so we started exploring other parts of the city. We almost applied for a few, but then one morning he woke up and said, “I want to stay here.” It was the summer we had eight (yes, eight) weddings to go to, and the argument that we’d be spending a lot of time and money traveling and purchasing gifts was compelling. So we did a “deep clean” where we literally pulled all the furniture into the middle of the room, dusted and washed every corner and crevice, and gave away a ton of things we no longer used. We rearranged the furniture.

I had hoped that the apartment would feel more welcoming afterward, but the strain only got worse. Since he usually got home later than I did, I used to listen for his key in the lock and cringe when I heard the click. On weekends we were local, I wandered the city by myself or made plans with friends while he stayed home on the computer with his headphones on.

All these years later, I honestly feel like that deep clean was part of that mental shift that helped us pull away from each other without there needing to be any big event that tore out the sutures. Of course, there’s also the fact that going to eight weddings and watching friends and family declare “Until death do us part” makes you question what the hell you’re doing and whether that’s a choice you should make.

That’s why I didn’t question it when, after my father died, the only thing I wanted to do for weeks was clean. For the fifteen months that he’d been sick, I’d basically been phoning it in with my cleaning and decluttering efforts—and feeling disconnected from myself and the other people in my life. I was in a rut. A thin film of dust covered nearly every surface of my apartment, and suddenly I could see how my closet was packed with clothes I hadn’t touched in years, making it hard to find what I actually wanted to wear. I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I felt like I had nothing to wear and had no idea how to get into a new pattern.

I started with my shoes. Then I moved onto the coats. How can one person have so many? I donated books and household goods and shredded so. much. paper. I also burned a ton of palo santo. Within a week of my cleansing adventure, I felt like a new person. For the first time in over a year, I could name what I wanted and how I planned to make it a reality. Interestingly, those things began to show up, as if by magic. The path began to reveal itself, and in better, more exciting ways than I could have dreamed.

If you want to try this out for yourself, here are a few tips.

Start Small

If your big goal is to clean and declutter your whole home or even a whole room, don’t put the pressure on yourself to climb that mountain all in one go. Start super small. As Leanne Jacobs said in the chapter about manifestation, even just sorting through the drawer where you keep bills and paying a few can help you feel calmer.

Set Guidelines

If structure helps you feel calmer, set yourself a schedule of what you’re going to work on and in what order or on what days. If you’re undertaking a project like going through your closet, if you need to, set yourself some rules to make it easier to know what to toss. For example, if you haven’t worn it in x number of months or if it makes you feel miserable or brings up bad memories, that’s a clue to get rid of it. If you’re like me and sometimes stumble on a box of old papers from college or grad school, ask yourself if you’ve ever once reached for those materials or anticipate ever needing them. Also, I know that sentimentality is strong, but never underestimate the satisfaction of shredding an old love letter from someone whose memory makes your blood boil. You’ll wonder what took you so long.

Enlist Help if Needed

There’s no shame in hiring a professional if you just can’t face the task alone. A professional organizer or a cleaning service can work magic. Of course, you can also call in friends and family members you know will be able to give you honest, constructive input as you sort and sift.

Practice Mindful (Re)Placement

If you’re doing any rearranging of furniture or purchasing new items to replace things you’ve let go of, be mindful and intentional about where you put your new acquisitions. Arranging furniture and items based on how you use them can add a sense of ease to your day. For example, you could place a chair near the closet where you keep your shoes so you can sit comfortably while you put them on in the morning. Or in the kitchen, set up the blender on your counter near things you use every day to make a smoothie. The goal is to streamline your day-to-day movements in a way that will bring joy to your mind, body, and spirit.

Bottom Line

Cleaning and organizing your physical space is a powerful way to shift your mind-set and make space for what you want to manifest. Try it.