Ellie barely felt Jack’s weight before he caught himself and rolled them so that she was on top.
“Where did you learn that move?” he asked.
“TV.” She lowered her face close to his. “You went easy on me, Jack.”
His hands tightened on her, but he didn’t say anything.
“Told you before,” she said. “I’m not fragile.”
He started to speak, but the studio door opened and his brother poked his head in.
“New type of defense?” Kel asked, amused. “Because I like it.”
Ellie pushed upright and smiled triumphantly. “I pinned him.”
Kel grinned. “Not many can say that.” He shut the door.
Ellie looked down at Jack. In their misspent youth he’d been highly skilled at getting girls to fall at his feet. Apparently he’d lost none of that particular talent, because she was falling.
Hard.
He stared up at her, and as if he could see her feelings in her face, he very softly murmured her name. She might have been mortified, but he didn’t give her the time for that. He rolled to his feet and pulled her with him.
He didn’t bring up the moment that night at dinner, for which she was grateful. Instead, they talked about…well, everything else. She learned that his parents had retired to Palm Beach. His siblings had all left the area too, except for Kel.
“There’s five grandkids,” Jack told her with a baffled shake of his head. “More than enough to take the pressure off me and Kel.”
“So you have no interest in the marriage-and-kids route?” she asked.
He shrugged, and her stomach did something funny. Either the food wasn’t agreeing with her, or…
Or she was the tiniest bit disappointed.
“When I was in the army,” he said, “my life wasn’t my own. There was no successful way to have a committed relationship. I saw no reason to bring a family into that.”
“But you’re out now. And your life is your own.” She paused, uncertain. “Isn’t it?”
“I guess maybe I’m just not used to that fact yet.”
“Maybe you just haven’t met The One to make it worth it.”
His gaze locked on hers for a long beat, during which she held her breath and waited for a response.
“Maybe,” he finally said, so quietly she wasn’t sure if she heard the words or read his lips. Whichever, they warmed her in a way she hadn’t realized she needed warming.
The next day, Ellie sat alone in the PIC offices, staring at the envelope she’d just opened while going through the mail. Or more correctly, she was staring at a check with a lot of zeros on it.
An anonymous donation, which had come from a lawyer of a business labeled only BNL, Inc.
Enough money to move PIC to a safer location and sign a new lease. She was boggled, overwhelmed and touched beyond belief. And for the first time in a long time—too long—she took a deep breath without the punch of anxiety, and wished she could hug her mysterious benefactor.
Two nights later Jack was back in his studio with Ellie. They were planning out the self-defense curriculum for the girls at PIC. The rest of his employees and students had left for the day, leaving just the two of them in the building.
For thirty minutes he’d shown her the beginner moves he would teach the girls in their workshop. Ellie was working in her snug yoga pants and a tank top that didn’t quite meet the waistband of the pants, both clinging to her damp skin.
Jack was trying not to notice.
They’d taken a break because her cell phone kept going off, and with each call she received, he better understood how much she took on herself to run PIC on top of her full-time teaching job. There were workshops to plan, speakers to arrange for, and then the responsibility for the girls themselves.
She finally ended her call and apologized for the umpteenth time, coming back to the mat.
“It’s okay,” he said. “You’re swamped.”
“Always.”
“If I heard right, you just booked what sounded like a brain surgeon and a race-car driver for upcoming workshops.”
“Yeah.” She smiled. “Good stuff, right?”
He thought she was good stuff. “Come here, El.”
“I don’t know…” Her eyes sparkled with good humor as she stood facing him, hands on hips. “The last time, I ended up on my back.”
That sat between them for a beat, and then she wisely changed the subject.
“Thanks for doing this,” she said softly. “I love that the girls are going to learn this stuff. From you.”
Nothing about Ellie Cahn was like any other woman he knew. She said what she meant, no hidden meaning. It was incredibly refreshing.
Not to mention just a little terrifying. He’d spent his entire life avoiding women who would want things from him.
Not that Ellie would ever ask for anything for herself…
But he wouldn’t hurt her. Ever. So why he gave a little tug on her arms, making sure she was off balance enough to fall against him, was anyone’s guess.
But when she smacked into him, he hugged her close. “You trying to save the world one kid at a time, El?”
“Maybe.” Pulling back, she met his gaze. “When we were that age, I was on a fast track to nowhere. And then my only anchor left town.”
Him. The knowledge was a hot poker in his chest. “I had to go,” he said. “There was nothing for me here. I was a punk-ass kid with a chip on my shoulder looking for trouble. And I’d have found it too.”
“I know.” She entangled their fingers and brought them to her chest, right over her heart. “I needed to make something of myself, too. WET Risk Takers saved my life. They taught me some self-respect, and how to take care of myself. How to stop walking the line of danger and stupidity, because I was worth something and deserved more. I knew if I could maybe do the same for even one girl, then I had to try.”
He stared at her and felt the catch deep within him. Heat, definitely. But affection too, and something more, much more than either. “You’re amazing, Ellie, you know that?”
She shook her head, a quiet smile on her face. “You gave your life to protect this country for what, ten years? You’re the amazing one.” The light in her eyes shifted, going from fun and games to that same something that was happening inside him.
It had happened the instant he’d first seen her again, on the side of the road trying to change her tire, muddy from head to toe.
It had happened again when she’d first sought out his help here at his studio.
And again every time he so much as looked at her.
“Do you want to go get something to eat?” she asked, her smile fading when he paused. “And by your hesitation, I’m guessing you’re trying to figure out how to say no and back out gracefully. It’s okay, Jack. I understand.”
“No, you don’t,” he said. “And yes, I want to get something to eat.”
“Are you going to tell me what I don’t under stand?”
“No.”
She considered him for a beat, then stood and stretched. Offered him her hand.
Actually, she was offering more than a hand and they both knew it. He wasn’t an easygoing, lighthearted, laid-back sort of guy. He’d seen a lot. Hell, he’d done a lot. He battled the dark memories with hard work.
And the occasional relationship.
Okay, maybe more than occasional. But no one ever snagged his interest for long. Little did. The studios were successful, and doing great, but if someone had only last week asked him if he was happy and satisfied, he’d have to say he wasn’t quite there.
And now, with Ellie, he was even more confused because emotions had been added to the mix.
It made him uncomfortable. Vulnerable.
But suddenly she was right in front of him, touching his face. “Jack,” she whispered, looking into his eyes. Slowly she smiled, then kissed him, and by the time she pulled back, neither of them was breathing steadily.
“So,” she murmured. “We have the workshop down, I think. It’d be great if the girls could dress appropriately for your class, as they would here at your studio. I was wondering how much uniforms are, and what kind you’d want.”
“I’ll provide uniforms.”
“No, Jack. I can’t ask you to do that—”
“You didn’t ask. You wouldn’t.”
She looked bemused. “What does that mean?”
“That you’d find it more preferable to choke on your pride than ask anyone for help.”
When she opened her mouth to protest, he arched a brow, daring her to say otherwise.
“It’s called independence,” she finally said.
“Or pigheadedness,” he corrected. “Consider the uniforms a done deal, Ellie.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“How about ‘thank you’.”
She smiled. “Thank you.”
“And maybe, ‘I’m forever in your debt, Jack.’”
With a laugh, she shifted close again. She slid a hand along his arm until he automatically stepped into her, going for the embrace, registering a split second too late her wicked intent as she hooked a leg behind his calf and dropped him.
Not a complete fool, he took her down with him, and—
“Hello? Ellie, is that you?” came a tinny voice.
Ellie lifted her head off the floor in confusion at the voice echoing in the studio around them. “Grandma?” Jack blinked. Grandma?
“Dear?” came the older woman’s disembodied voice. “I think you pocket-dialed me again.”
Ellie pulled her phone from her pocket and winced. “Yep, that was me. I’m sorry.”
“You sound breathless, dear. What are you doing?”
Ellie’s gaze flew to Jack. He started to speak, but she put a hand over his mouth. “I’m exercising,” Ellie said to her grandma, then grimaced at the lie. Jack grinned.
“Well, don’t overdo it,” her grandma said. “You might get hurt.”
Jack ended the call for Ellie and tossed the phone aside.
“Am I going to get hurt, Jack?”
He looked into her eyes for a long moment, then rose and pulled her up to her feet. “No,” he said firmly, and took a big step back from her to ensure it.
For the rest of the week, Ellie kept herself too busy to acknowledge the ball of sadness in her chest. She told herself that it was midterms, and she had kids panicking, not to mention papers to grade and PIC to deal with. She was taking applications for kids for the next session, and planning new workshops and…
And.
It wasn’t school.
It wasn’t PIC.
It was the look on Jack’s face when she’d been in his studio.
Determination.
To not hurt her.
He was backing off so that he wouldn’t, couldn’t, hurt her.
Which was fine. She understood. She really did. And telling herself that, she simply stepped on the hamster wheel and kept going.
Fortunately, there hadn’t been any more unpleasant messages left on her car. Even better, she’d procured a lease on a building in a safer area and was making plans to move PIC for the next session.
Unfortunately, Kia had come to school with some suspicious bruising on her arm, which she’d claimed had happened at basketball practice.
Ellie hoped that was true.
At the end of the week, one day before Jack was to give his first self-defense workshop at PIC, he appeared in the doorway of Ellie’s classroom about fifteen minutes after the last kid had left.
“Hey,” she said from behind her desk, doing her best to remain cool and calm. Not easy when he was the best thing she’d seen all week. “You need help with preparation for tomorrow?”
“No.”
She waited, but he said nothing more.
“Is this a social visit?” she asked.
Instead of answering, he pushed off the doorjamb and came close, leaning a hip on the edge of her desk as he studied her. “I have a question.”
Uh-oh.
“Are we avoiding each other for any particular reason?”
She met his inscrutable gaze and decided to go with the only thing she had—honesty. “I don’t know about you, but I got the impression you were walking away from a personal relationship with me, and I didn’t want to face it. Denial is my friend.”
He didn’t smile. “I’m not walking away.”
“Regret then. You’re regretting…me.”
His eyes were reproachful. “Don’t put words in my mouth, El.”
“Then give me your words.”
He pulled her out of her chair and into him. His arms came around her, warm and strong and familiar, and in spite of herself, she melted against him. “Maybe I got…unnerved,” he said.
“Maybe? Or definitely?”
He let out a breath and pressed his forehead to hers. “Definitely. But I’m working on it.”
“Yeah. How’s that going?”
An almost smile quirked the corners of his mouth. “I’ll keep you updated. I can be…a little slow on the uptake.”
“Yes. It’s a genetic flaw in the male design.”
His huff of laughter said he agreed. “I was hoping for patience from you.”
“I have buckets of patience.”
His mouth twitched. “Want to exercise some of it while we go to dinner?”
“Now?”
“Yeah. Now.”
As if she could resist.
They drove to the shore. Since it was early spring and freezing, they were the only crazy people there. Jack took her to a small seafood café on the water, and afterward they walked along the pier. Side by side they watched the last of the day fade away.
Then Jack shifted to face her and looked deep into her eyes. She liked that, she’d discovered. Far more than she should, given that he was a huge risk to her emotional well-being, not to mention her heart, which wanted to roll over and reveal its tender underside to him. “You’re going to face twenty teenage girls tomorrow,” she said. “Nervous?”
He laughed softly.
“Right.” She shook her head at herself. “I guess compared to the things you’ve faced, it’s going to be a walk in the park.”
He pressed his mouth to her jaw and said nothing.
“You probably saw things,” she said. “In Special Forces.”
He kissed the spot beneath her ear and she shivered. “You’re trying to distract me.”
“No, you’re distracting me.” He shifted to the corner of her mouth.
“Where were you stationed?”
And then the other corner… “In places hotter and sandier than you can imagine.”
She ignored the fact that her knees were wobbly. “Did you ever get hurt?”
“Yes.”
Her heart ached. “A lot?”
“More than I wanted to.”
Her eyes met his. “Did you ever think you were going to die?”
He sighed and lifted his head. “Yes.”
“What happened?”
“I didn’t.” He cupped her face. “Any more questions that you need answered right now?”
She could feel his body against hers, strong and warm. “No,” she whispered. “Not right now.”
“Good.” And his mouth covered hers.