I couldn’t hear my thoughts over the noise the press made the minute my car door opened, and I stepped outside.
After meeting with Sergei Zander, there was so much to unpack and too much to process. I had made my way into the Westeria as fast as my legs would carry me, and someone from the staff was already waiting. They had stopped all the press from coming inside. I gave the older clerk a tired smile.
“Good afternoon, Miss Renée,” he said.
I sighed, “I’m so sorry for all the crazy. I’ll be out of your hair soon.”
He waved away my comment. “This isn’t the first time the press has tried to get in here, and it won’t be the last.”
My grateful smile blossomed for an entire second before I entered the elevator and made my way upstairs.
I stepped out of the pants and shirt and jumped into my sweats the moment I was in my room. The world had stopped watching for a couple of seconds, and I couldn’t be more relieved. Taking off all my make-up, I felt liberated, and my eyes were a little less tired.
Hours later, when the sunlight lamps had dimmed, and the city was engulfed in the vibrant nightlife, a soft rap sounded, and I put down the book to stroll over to the door and open it.
A young boy with a silver tray smiled up at me. “Good evening, Miss Renée. A letter has arrived for you.”
The crème envelope that lay on top of it said Raven. My name was written in cursive handwriting.
I took it, thanked the boy, and walked back inside. Unsure.
The letters were graceful, but demanding. My heart thudded; I knew who had written this. Opening it, I read the text. There was only an address on it—one I knew by heart.
I smiled.
My tiredness was pushed to the backburner as I jumped into some boots and threw on a thick coat; glad I had bought the woolen garment after returning from the shadow plains. It was beautiful. Expensive as hell, but totally worth it. The thick black fabric kept me warm when it was freezing outside, like tonight—like most nights.
I used the back exit of the hotel, and, after a short walk, passing almost no one, I arrived at the destination, where Jordan was already waiting for me.
He had pulled the collar of his expensive-looking grey coat up, covering his chiseled jaw. His straight nose and cheekbones seemed to cut the air, and his now shorter, blonde hair was back to its original length.
He was incredibly handsome.
I stalked closer, as fast as my braced leg would let me.
“Raven!” Ben chimed, and I grinned.
Jordan looked to the side, his attention landing on me like a blanket, taking me in from head to toe—his lips curving into a smile as if they had a life of their own.
“Hi,” I said to both men.
Jordan cleared his throat. “Hey.”
I arrived at the stall, and Jordan immediately pulled me closer, throwing an arm around my shoulders as a partner would.
Ben’s mouth gaped open. “You’re together?”
I looked at Jordan to see what he would call us, but he already answered, “We are.” Which made the butterflies inside my chest come alive. His fingers squeezed my shoulder as he smiled down at me, eyes swirling with emotions.
“I guess we are,” I mused.
“There’s not a lot of guessing involved, darling,” Ben said. “It radiates from the both of you.”
Jordan chuckled. “Well, so does our mouthwatering. Can we have two hotdogs?”
“But of course!” Ben readied the little buns, being extra gleeful as he made little hearts out of the sauce.
We took the hotdogs from him, and Jordan paid. Clearly, way too much.
Ben stared at it and muttered something that sounded a lot like gods before he tried to give some of it back, but Jordan stopped him. “Go spend the rest of the evening with your family, Ben.”
The man looked at him like he’d gone mad. “I can’t take this, Jordan.”
“You can. Thanks again for the hotdog.” He held up the bun before taking a large bite out of it.
I waved at Ben and said, “See you later, Ben.”
“You’re my favorite customers; you know that, right?” Ben yelled after us, and we both laughed. I blew Ben a kiss, and he acted as if he had caught it.
I turned back around, still smiling. “Were you trying to impress me, Locke?” I joked.
He looked at me sideways and shook his head, brows furrowed. “With money? Never. He deserves to spend the evening with his family.”
I bit my lip. “He does.” I loved that about Jordan. He had grown up with money, but he was aware of the value of things.
We both ate our hotdogs in silence. We finished within minutes—blame it on us being soldiers—and I regarded him for a while.
“So, we’re together now?” I said softly, focusing on whether his expression betrayed anything that said otherwise.
Jordan smiled both dimples into existence. “I mean... You know that if you don’t want to, or things are happening too fast, you can tell me. I’ll take a step back.”
“But never completely?”
His expression spoke volumes. “Never again.”
“I do want to be together.” I bit my bottom lip.
Someone on the square we were walking on started playing music, and we both fell silent while listening to it.
“How is Sev?” I asked. I had never seen his son, and I wondered what he looked like—if he had his father’s eyes, his smile.
Jordan’s entire facial expression changed at the mention of his son. It was the cutest thing I had ever seen. “Sevrano is doing well. He doesn’t understand why he can’t live with both of his parents at the same time, but he will get used to that. He’s speaking in full sentences now, too.”
I smiled. The joy radiated from him in waves, and I couldn’t help getting swept up in it.
We continued walking, our footsteps clacking on the pavement and the wind blowing on our backs, the only sounds we could hear. “What’s it like, being a father?”
“It’s…” Jordan looked to the sky—where the stars were looking down on us—and frowned, pulling a hand through his hair. “It’s like my heart started beating outside my chest the moment he was born. It’s the most rewarding job I have ever had.”
“That sounds intense.”
He smiled at me, a full teeth-baring smile. “It is.”
I tore my eyes away from him and bit my lip as I looked at the ground.
“You don’t mind talking about Sev?” he asked, a question I had anticipated.
“Hearing you talk about him now warms my heart. I can’t wait to meet him one day, when everyone is ready.” I smiled a little. “But when he was first born—well, even before that—it used to be hard to even think about him,” I confessed.
“I understand,” he acknowledged. “It was even hard for me to think about him at some point before he was born. But after… There’s only a before and after he was born—splitting my life—me, in two pieces.”
I walked closer to him, and Jordan wrapped an arm around my shoulders, his fingers playing with the side of my neck as I leaned into his touch. “I can’t wait for him to meet you, too.”
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.” And I meant it. Hearing he had difficulty adjusting to all the changes in his life made me feel incredibly selfish. I had been so self-absorbed, so focused on my pain, that I hadn’t once considered his.
He waved a hand my way. “You don’t have to apologize, Raven. If you would’ve been pregnant with another man’s baby, I wouldn’t exactly have jumped with joy every time I was near you, either.”
My brows crawled together as I inhaled deeply. “It was never about Sev. I knew he had nothing to do with everything that happened between us. It was always the thing he represented—you, not with me. Us, not together.”
Jordan looked up at the sky. “I’ve lain awake more times than I can count, thinking about the scenarios in which we could have made us work from the beginning. I would think myself into a downward spiral in the middle of the night and wake up with the memory of you on my skin.” He let a finger trail over my cheek, the path he carved sparking with passion.
I looked down at the ground. “I tried to drown my feelings for you in my work. And just when I hadn’t thought about you for a day, someone would mention you, or I would dream of you—as if the universe wouldn’t let me forget about you.”
“I’m glad you didn’t. I had long lost hope of you returning my feelings.”
“Not even at Hunt and Nik’s wedding?” I had been such a mess the night after that I hadn’t been able to cope for a few days straight before Kelian forced me to get my shit together.
Jordan chuckled darkly, “Especially after Hunt and Nik’s wedding.”
“I read your messages, you know. A couple days ago.”
“Oh, I know,” he said. “I read your reply.”
My cheeks tinted pink. “I wished I’d read them sooner.”
We smiled at each other. It might have prevented a lot of heartbreak.
“You think this will work?” I voiced my insecurity. “Us?”
Jordan stopped walking, cupping my neck as he pulled me to face him, my head between his hands. “Raven…” He tipped my head back. “I know this will work. Want to know why?”
Enraptured by him, I nodded, blinking once.
“Because we are meant to be. However much we have tried to deny it, however much we tried to stay away from each other—the idea of us—we are here to stay. I realized it the moment I saw you at the gala. You looked like a dream, a very specific one.”
I closed the gap between us, brushing my lips over his to catch the word he wanted to speak. To savor it.
Mine.
My lips moved of their own accord, trying to convey all that he made me feel. Trying to tell him with words was too hard.
He made a sound in the back of his throat that weakened my knees. My lips parted, communicating my love for him. His tongue slipped past the seam of my lips, playing with my own. His hands moved over my side, pulling me closer to him as I wrapped my arms around his neck, creating a little cocoon for just the two of us. Our lips locked, our tongues clashing.
“Come home with me,” he muttered against my lips, voice hoarse with longing.
I sighed, breaking the kiss reluctantly. He leaned his forehead against mine. I rubbed my lips together, closing my eyes. “I want to.” But as I thought about my leg, the trial that had just wrapped up, the impending verdict…
“But it’s too soon,” Jordan concluded for me.
Opening my eyes, I nodded and started saying, “I’m so—”
“Don’t be,” he interrupted me, grabbing my hand in a firm grip. “Like I said before, you’ll get the time you need. All the time you need. I meant it. This”—he pointed between us—“we are here to stay, Raven.”
He pulled me close again, and I nestled my face in his neck—at home in his arms.