Chapter 24

 

FREI CAME HOME looking beat that evening and I could feel how much it wore on her being shoved back into her past. As she went upstairs to shower, I set out her dinner and attempted to figure out how much whisky to ice she liked. The stuff smelled potent but I noticed she only ever had one glass. I knew she used to drink a lot more. Although I wondered why that had changed, I was happy she was drinking less of it. I didn’t like to think of what it did to her insides.

“Lorelei?”

I stepped out of the way and pointed to her dinner. “Eat, relax, I’ll leave you in peace.” I smiled at her, hoping to dislodge the frown on her face.

“You made it for me?”

You’d have thought I’d given her treasure. It was steak and vegetables in my attempt at casserole. It weren’t the best meal for the heat but I was sick of salad. I hoped she was too.

She wandered to the table and looked down at it. I handed her the Worcester Sauce she liked so much. “Makes my eyes water so you’ll have to do that part yourself.”

She speared a piece of steak with her fork and bit it in half with her teeth. Inside was nice and brown. I’d cooked it up first. Okay, so the kitchen looked like a twister had paid a visit but I’d cooked up something nice, by myself. I was proud of that.

“It took you hours?” she said, eying the devastation behind me.

I shrugged. That was the problem with kitchen diners, your artistic process was revealed.

She let out a breath and shook her head. “You’re a balm for the soul, you know that?”

I tapped the Worcester. “Enjoy.”

She grasped my hand as I turned to leave. “You don’t have to go. Sit, stay. Have you eaten?”

My stomach growled and she dropped her gaze to it with a smile.

“You wanna talk about it?” I asked as I filled up a bowl for myself. It was when I looked down that I realized that casserole might be better to eat with a spoon. She nodded as I held up two.

“Which part? The fact that I lost five kids today or Huber taunting me about it?”

Five? I slumped down into the seat next to her. “What happened?”

“Maybe I just didn’t inspire them enough.” Her tone was full of hurt as she dosed her dinner with Worcester Sauce.

“I doubt that.” I chewed on my food. It tasted great. The thought of five kids gone stole the joy from it. “You’re a great teacher.”

She eyed me for a moment. “You hated me in training. You nearly drowned and then almost froze to death.”

“And you treated me like everybody else there.” I smiled. “It weren’t exactly fun but the training stuck. Most of it.”

“It did?” She tucked into her food. I felt a pang of pride at her groan of appreciation. It could have been the Worcester for all I knew but I was taking it.

“When I needed it in St. Jude’s, it came out. Sure, you scarred me for life . . .” I chomped more of my food, my stomach demanding that I feed it. “But it saved a lot of lives.”

“She was an idiot.” Frei’s gaze hardened. “I ordered her to tell you. I trusted her to keep you informed. Another success for my ability to inspire and command.”

“Self-pity don’t sit right on you.” It was painful to know that Renee hadn’t told me even under orders. I did my best to let that go. Tonight wasn’t about me. “What happened with your group?”

“It takes extreme skill to be the kind of thief they are looking for. It takes a passion for it.”

“They didn’t have it?”

She ate her food and I turned back to mine. She’d explain when she was ready. Frei was quiet and controlled but having spent time around her, I could tell that it was a sign of her processing the situation. She thought deeply but it was always worth waiting for the words when they came.

“A lot of them didn’t understand why. They needed to learn so much without any real reason. I couldn’t fire them up. All I could do was make it a competition. I lost them.”

She had a difficult job. Mine was easy in comparison. I was building them up. Weight training, fitness, it paid off. They were feeling better, their conditions were under control. The benefits were there to see. How did someone explain why climbing a wall blindfolded was useful?

“Mine asked the same thing today.”

Frei kept her eyes on her food. “Huber enjoyed informing me of your success.”

“Nothing whatsoever to do with me.”

Her icy blues met mine. “Everything to do with you. I saw the bond, the way they held that boy upright. It comes from you.”

I didn’t think so.

It came from me shutting my eyes and asking. Jed and the others were good at their core. “It’s a lot easier when you are dealing with the ones that everyone writes off. They want to prove themselves.”

“That isn’t a good trait for mine.” She sighed. “Under- handedness, manipulation, extreme fitness, and agility yes, but a good heart?” She shook her head. “Not so much.”

“They sabotaged each other.” It was a statement. The flash that flicked before my eyes showed me as much. Competition was encouraged but it had brought out the worst in already damaged kids.

“And not deftly either.” She shook her head. “I couldn’t do anything but stand and watch.”

That I knew first hand from watching Miroslav. He’d been lucky to find a hero in Jed.

I put my arm around her and pulled her into me. She didn’t resist and relaxed against me. I could feel her tears wet on my neck. “Crespo was happy.”

“He looked like he needs to be covered in treacle and buried in a termite mound.” My ability to let it all slide waned when faced with these people. It was so hard when they were so happy to profit from other’s pain.

“He’s vile,” she muttered in agreement. “Some are far worse than others.”

“They are all slave traders.”

She lifted her head up to look at me. Her eyes glistened with her tears. “You told him what you thought of him, didn’t you?”

She was talking about Huber, her tone said as much.

“He confuses me. I hate what he does. I hate his attitude.” I shrugged. “You care about him. He must have a good trait in there somewhere for that to happen.”

She held my gaze. I wasn’t sure what thoughts ran through her mind but I was happy to let her think. I smiled, hoping that she would soak up the warmth and comfort from it.

She cleared her throat and noticed the glass on the counter beside her empty bowl. She lifted it up. “You pay attention.”

I finished off my food not sure what to say.

“Remind me again why you aren’t married?”

I snorted with laughter, picked up our bowls, and wandered to the sink.

“I’m serious.” She sipped on her whiskey. “Why can you love everyone so freely but not let anyone in further?”

Didn’t that shot hurtle past my armor to a raw spot? “You pay attention too.”

“It’s not a bad thing.” She sighed. “It sounded like a cheap shot, I’m sorry.”

I washed off the dishes and leaned against the sink with my hip. “You’re fighting all the survival mechanisms that you’ve counted on all your life.” I met her eyes. “You hate losing, you have to be the best. Huber issued you a challenge ’cause he knows how to push your buttons.” Some folks had bigger issues than I ever wanted to understand, Huber being one of them. “He’s smarting ’cause we’re close.”

“Are we?” She raised her eyebrows, her glass to her lips. “Close?” she whispered.

That earned her a smirk. “Best you don’t tell nobody, huh?” I picked the towel off the side and wiped down the dishes. Frei kept doing the household chores like I wouldn’t notice so I wanted to make sure she got we were a team. She weren’t nobody’s slave. “You don’t want just anybody thinking there’s warmth beneath the metal.”

“Good thing you’re not just anybody then.” Frei rattled her glass, the ice chinked around. “No one else knows how I like my drink.”

The cocky attitude emerged with a playful smile and I knew I’d done enough to lift her out of her funk. “But then they don’t get to spend time with you neither.”

She shook her head. “You’re insane, you know that?”

She got up and turned away. Then sighed and turned back and strode over to me.

“Insane . . . and a breath of fresh air.” She planted a kiss on my cheek and stalked over to her laptop.

“Tell Lilia.”

Frei sat and raised her eyebrows at me.

“About the kids we lost today. She could help.”

She sighed. “Then she’d ask questions.”

“Then tell someone who can help. You know people.” I smiled a reassuring smile. “You have a lot of folks who owe you favors. I got a gut feeling they’ll be happy to get one over on Crespo.”

“You do?” She looked down at her laptop, a range of emotions too varied for me to pinpoint rippled across her eyes.

“If they know you half as well as I do, they’ll be happy to help.”

Frei cocked her head. “I doubt that.”

“Doubt it all you like but it’s still fact.”

Frei started tapping away. Her energy filled her eyes as she focused on the screen. She couldn’t control what had happened with her group today, but giving her some way that might help was worth it.

“Why German?” I asked.

Frei’s eyes snapped to mine and narrowed.

“Huber is German, ain’t he?” I tried not to flinch under her glare.

She took a breath and eyes softened. “His family are from Germany. The slave speaks what the owner speaks.”

“So Miroslav’s owners are Polish?”

Frei nodded. “Polish American. Huber is German American. Crespo is Italian American and so on . . .”

“So slave trading is a community thing?” Were there Welsh Americans out there needing to be poked too?

“It’s America. We’re all second or third generation something or other.” Frei smiled at me. “Even you have a bit of imposter in you.”

Nan had revealed that I had native roots too. I guess everybody was a mix somewhere along the line no matter where they were born.

“So Huber lives in the States, right?”

Frei sipped her whiskey. I could tell from the twinkle in her eyes that I was asking too many questions. “Baltimore.”

“Have you ever been—?”

“Yes.” She met my eyes. “All over the world in a lot of different cities but yes, Lorelei, I lived in Germany for a while.”

I knew she was finding me grilling her amusing. I wondered how many other people just sat and talked to her.

“That where you met Renee?” I asked, hoping she wouldn’t cut me off. “I’ll quit asking then.”

“Yes.” Frei ran her hand over her face. “Her POI was in the city. She liked to spend her vacation there.”

“Renee?” Did she even get vacations?

“No the POI.” Frei held up her hand. “That’s all you get.”

I nodded and pulled a book from the shelves. She needed to contact whoever could help the kids who’d failed and I had done the best I could to lift her spirits. Somehow, it didn’t feel enough. The more I learned, the more I saw how hard her life had been. I wanted to help her. I wanted to take the hurt away.

I sighed.

Maybe I’d never learn my lesson. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted to.