CHAPTER FORTY-FIVE
I’ve made too many trips to the drama buffet, and I am full. Franklin wants to see me, I know, but I’ve done enough rehashing for one morning, so I opt for some happy drama. Charlie. It surprises me, a little, how much I want to see him. I head for his room in a hurry, hoping he’s there.
“Come on in,” he calls out when I knock.
He’s reading on the bench seat by the window. I’m not sure whom he was expecting, because he doesn’t even look up to see who’s paying him a visit.
I sit next to him. “What’re you reading?”
A big grin lights up his face as he holds up the spine of his book for inspection. Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. My heart melts a little.
“So, what are you doing up? I thought you’d be recuperating in bed.” He reaches over to touch my face and the familiar rush of butterflies takes flight in my stomach. He runs his fingers across my cheek; his eyes search for damage. “I was going to come check on you in a little while, but I wanted to let you rest.”
“I’m feeling fine today,” I whisper as I close the small distance between us. Our faces are inches apart, and I can feel his breath warm and ragged against my lips.
“I’m glad you’re better.”
He places his gentle hands on the small of my back, pulling me in close. I let out a soft gasp and the familiar sensation of everything falling away takes me once again. I run my shy and careful fingers through his hair. There’s an awkward excitement possessing our hands and lips. His fingers move up to my face, pulling me into a deep kiss that leaves us both breathless.
Eternity sounds pretty good if it’s going to be like this. I lay my head on his chest and settle into his arms.
“So, what do you want to do?” he asks.
“Other than this? Because I’m totally fine with staying right here. They’ve given me a free day to recover. Want to join me?”
He squeezes me tight. “I wish I could. I’m free until OIA, though.”
“OIA?”
“Opportunities in Action.”
I cross my arms on his chest and prop myself up. “Huh?”
“The work program. You still haven’t read the manual, have you?”
“I’m taking the Fifth on that.” I lean in and kiss his jawline. “What I would love is a quiet, normal day. I don’t want to fight with anyone. I just want to relax. Is that even possible around here?”
Charlie runs his fingers up and down my back. If he keeps it up, he can forget about his job.
“If a lounge day is what you want, a lounge day you will get.”
“I’ll believe it when it happens.”
“I promise you things will slow down. You’ve had a crazy batch of bad luck, but it’s going to get better.”
“I hope so.” I snuggle up against him. “This is sure an improvement.”
“Yes it is.” He kisses my forehead. “Forbidden or not, I don’t care.”
“We’ll just have to be sneaky, I guess.”
We sit in daydream silence, holding each other and enjoying the newness of our feelings.
“Charlie? When you were alive, did you ever think about what happens when we die?”
“Not really. I was too busy being invincible. Did you?”
“Not as it applied to me specifically, but yes.” I hesitate. “Do you mind if I tell you about my friend Aaron?”
“Of course not. You can tell me about anything. You know that.”
The story comes tumbling out, like I’ve been waiting since the train to tell it. “He was my best friend. His family lived right across the street from me in this amazing Victorian house, complete with a huge outdoor racetrack for radio-controlled cars.”
“Nice.”
“I know, right? Every boy’s dream. They moved in when Aaron and I were both five. We met when he came over to play. I think his parents were unpacking and my mom volunteered to get Aaron out of their hair for a few hours. He was six days older than me, and always hung it over my head. He teased me about how he was so much more mature. We were inseparable. He never gave the fact that I was black and had white parents a second thought. It was as natural to him as it was to me. Even when we reached the ‘boys have cooties and girls are gross’ phase, we stayed close.
“He wasn’t just my best friend; he was my first crush, and my first slow dance.” I smile, remembering that night in middle school, which now seems so long ago. “Right around that time—we were twelve—Aaron started getting headaches, and he was tired all the time. He went from athletic to zero energy pretty fast, and after a few weeks of not getting any better, his parents took him to the doctor.” I close my eyes, marveling at the pain that still comes when I think of Aaron. “It was so quick. He was diagnosed with leukemia in November, and by summer he was gone. Just like that.” I snap my fingers.
“I’m sorry,” Charlie says. He runs his fingers up and down my back.
“I needed to tell someone. He was my best friend and I still miss him so much, even five years later. I guess I never let myself get close to anyone after him.” I look up at Charlie’s eyes with a shy smile.
“I guess that makes me one lucky guy.”
“Is that so?”
He pulls me into a deep kiss. It’s a good thing I’m dead, because my heart feels like it’s going to explode out of my chest, beating a rhythm of fireworks and excitement. Lying back on his bed, I give myself over to the moment. My hands are on his shoulders, pulling him close, then on his chest, and I forget everything but the urgency. Gone is the shyness of last night’s first, delicate encounter. This could get out of hand.
He sits up and takes a shuddering breath. “We should slow down. I … ” He looks down at his bracelet. “I have to get going to work.”
“Already?”
“Time flies, huh?” He gives me a gentle kiss and takes a moment to regain his composure. “I’ll see you after I get back, okay?”
“Count on it,” I say, still breathless.
“I’ll walk you to the door,” he offers.
“I’ll walk you to the elevator.”
Despite our attempt to keep a low profile, a few raised eyebrows greet us as we make our way through the common area. With a wave goodbye, Charlie is on the elevator and gone, and I am at a loss. What to do now? Thanks to my day of rest, I have no appointments—Franklin can wait—and no pressing issues, and, at the moment, nothing on my mind but Charlie.
Deciding to go with my lazy day plans, I elect to find something to read. At the library, I am faced with the computer-free, browse-and-find-for-yourself setup, which is fine since I’m not in a hurry.
Perusing the aisles takes me back to my first day at Atman and my first encounter with Charlie. Even though it has been little more than a week, it feels like a lifetime ago, and I begin to wonder if I’m even the same person anymore. My feelings remain by and large the same, but the edge of desperation is softening. I’m forming real relationships in this place, relationships that make facing the afterlife doable. While I still miss my life, my family and my friends, it’s starting to feel a little bit bearable.
I search for the perfect book: nothing too heavy, nothing too dumb, nothing too serious. Funny and irreverent sounds nice. War and Peace? Not even close. The Complete Works of William Shakespeare? That’s a big no. I read title after title, rejecting possibility after possibility until I find just the thing. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Perfect.
“An excellent choice,” says a voice behind me. Bobby. He’s using his major height advantage to glance over my shoulder.
“Hey, Bobby. How’s it going?”
“Quite well, actually. This new experiment is rather fascinating.”
“Really? That’s good.”
“Oh, yes. I’ve found the simple act of cooperation has opened up a world of interesting observations, although it would seem we are presently in a period of adjustment that may skew results.”
“How so?”
“My cooperation, as you know, seems to have caught the staff members of Atman off-guard. They appear wary at this point, and are only beginning to adjust to the idea that I am, in fact, fully participating in their plan.” Bobby studies me as he scratches his chin. “The real question, though, is how you are faring this morning? I have heard a most disturbing account of a rather unpleasant encounter.”
“I’m fine. I was in pretty rough shape, but I feel a lot better today.”
“Excellent. It is my sincere wish you enjoy a stress-free, relaxing day with Mr. Adams.” He points to the book. “I won’t keep you from him and his amusing anecdotal views on the universe.”
“Okay. I’ll see you later, Bobby.”
“Don’t forget your towel,” he says as he walks away.
The next stop of the day is my suite, but as I’m heading toward my room, thoughts of giant doughnuts fill my head. The desire for a good blast of sugar is competing with the utter laziness of not wanting to walk down to the cafeteria. In the end, laziness wins and my feet deliver me to my room.
I’m greeted by the blinking light of our message center. It gets me wondering how they can send multiple messages from different places at different times. Do these canisters have some sort of recall button so other departments can get them? After dumping the canister’s contents on the table, I grab the first message.
Hey sweetie,
Don’t forget to stop by later, okay?
Crosby
I toss his note aside, too intent on relaxation to even consider walking all the way to Admin right now. The other piece of mail catches my attention. It isn’t in an envelope. My legs go weak when I realize what I’m looking at.
YOON, HANNAH
08:15 TRACK 17, PLATFORM B
TRAIN 12 (EXPRESS SERVICE, NONSTOP)
PASSENGERS: ONE
AUTHORIZATION: 9YH4XX7RK
PLEASE ARRIVE AT THE PLATFORM PROMPTLY AT 08:00 TOMORROW.
REPORT TO TICKETING LEVEL B FOR CHECK-IN AT LEAST THIRTY MINUTES PRIOR TO DEPARTURE.