Chapter 32
Not only was I a fucking mess, but I was also way in over my head.
After Stone had left my motel room, I had slid to the floor in a trembling mess because I believed him. He was going to destroy me if I didn’t give in, and I didn’t know what to do about that.
Then his words about repaying my parents’ loyalty had kept drumming around in my head. I knew my pride wasn’t worth my family losing everything they’ve worked so hard for. Still, handing Stone a win would be like handing my soul over to him.
He’d own me.
I wasn’t sure how long I sat on that motel room floor, wondering how I got myself into this mess, before I finally made it out to my car and got some clothes and made myself presentable enough to face the world. However, after spending two hours searching for rooms to rent and filling out applications, I found myself back at Kincaid’s front door.
When I had texted her, telling her that I needed her help, she had immediately replied, and I knew that, no matter what happened between me and Stone, there was no way I could walk away from someone as selfless and special as Kincaid. Even after telling her that I never wanted to see her again or have anything to do with anyone in The Order, she had welcomed me back to her apartment, no questions asked.
Kincaid had buzzed me into her building, and stepping out of the elevator, making my way down the hallway, I could see she was already standing in her doorway, waiting for me.
I almost started crying.
It was eight on a Saturday night, and I was at Kincaid Black’s apartment, ready to just cry all over the poor girl.
Goddamn Stone Lexington.
Kincaid stepped back and let me through the door, but when I stopped in the middle of her living room, I was brought up short as a beautiful Hastings Martin smiled at me from the kitchen off the east side of the apartment.
Hastings Martin was five-foot-four of just stunning beauty. She had platinum blonde hair and bright hazel eyes, but she wasn’t sporting the typical girl-next-door look. Hastings could best be described as elegant. She was captivating, classy.
“Rylee, this is Hastings Martin,” Kincaid said, coming up next to me. “She’s my roommate.”
I gave Hastings a tentative smile. “Hi.”
“Hey,” she returned, still smiling. “Don’t mind me, I was just leaving. Party at Drummond Markle’s frat.” And no one could fault her for that. Even if you weren’t throwing your hat in the ring for some of Drummond Markle’s attentions, it was enough to just be around him, so you could stare at the guy. Take Hayden Christensen and multiply him by ten, and you got Drummond Markle.
Still, as gorgeous as Drummond Markle was, apparently, blondes didn’t do it for me. I was attracted to brunettes with brown eyes who were complete assholes.
“Uh, good luck,” I muttered because I didn’t know what else to say.
Hastings laughed. “Oh, I’m not interested in Drummond.” She waved a perfectly manicured hand at me. “He just throws the best parties.”
I quickly turned to face Kincaid. “Oh, God,” I rushed out. “Were you going to his party, too? Did I ruin your plans?”
“No, Rylee,” she answered. “I was in for the night.” Her answer made me feel better, but I wasn’t quite sure that I believed her.
“Well, I’m off, ladies,” Hastings announced. “If you guys decide you’re up for a little fun tonight, text me and I’ll meet you guys at Drummond’s.”
“Thanks,” Kincaid told her while I just stayed mummed. I’d never heard anything bad about Drummond Markle, but I was pretty sure he was another person who was too cool for me.
After Hastings left, Kincaid led me to the couch-déjà vu-and went to get us both something to drink. When she returned with two bottled iced teas, I hadn’t even let her ass get comfortable on the couch before I was spilling out my humiliation again.
And, once again, I told her everything. I told her everything from the moment Stone showed up at my motel room to when he stormed out, leaving me a mental and emotional mess. I even told her how I sat on the floor and cried forever because I was so fucked-up over all this.
When I was done, Kincaid dropped back against the couch and just blinked at me. Then she took a drink of her tea as if it were spiked, then blinked at me some more.
When my nerves couldn’t take it anymore, I cried out, “What?”
“I’m just not sure what to give you first,” she replied. “The bad news or the worst news.”
I let out a pained sigh. “Great.”
“But before I break the terrible news to you, I’d be remiss if I didn’t give you points for going up against Stone Lexington,” she said. “I mean, I knew you had spunk when you wouldn’t let Alexander intimidate you at the initiation, but I never imagined you’d have the balls to bump dicks with Stone fucking Lexington.”
“So, is this the part where you tell me I’m screwed?”
Kincaid let out a deep sigh, and she even looked a bit regretful, which would have turned my stomach into knots if I hadn’t already been a mess.
“Saxton named me as his supporter when we were freshmen,” she began. “That was the earliest they could make their commitments with the beginning of this year being the deadline to choose someone.”
“But…but Stone didn’t choose me until the night before,” I reminded her.
“And that should tell you all you need to know about how powerful Stone Lexington is, Rylee,” she said softly. “The Order and the other initiates had already known he had originally opted out of choosing someone, and that was another example of his power. No one has ever refuted the rules like that before.”
“How do you know all this?” I asked. She spoke as if she were a member and not a supporter like the rest of us girls.
“Saxton and I are friends, Rylee. Real friends. When he chose me, he also chose to share what he knew about the other initiates and what I should expect being involved with The Order.”
“Are Ross and Jennifer friends?” She shook her head. “Fox and Alexis?” She shook her head again, but this time, at the mention of Fox’s name, her eyes shifted a bit. It was minuscule, but I noticed, nonetheless.
“No, they’re not. Jennifer and Alexis were chosen after a lot of consideration,” she explained. “And The Order prefers it that way. If the members have no emotional connections to their supporters, things are less likely to get messy. If they knew Saxton and I were friends, they might fear that he’d choose me over The Order one day. That is, if push ever came to shove.”
“That’s why the Hera contract is such a big deal,” I surmised.
Kincaid nodded. “Stone essentially told them that you are going to matter more to him than The Order, and with that declaration, the only way The Order can control his loyalty is to make you an extension of him, making you practically a member yourself.”
“Christ, this is all so crazy,” I muttered.
“And that’s where the bad news comes in,” she grimaced.
I steadied myself. “Okay, hit me with it.”
“Part of the problem is that you still don’t believe this is real,” she said, but not unkindly. “You haven’t let yourself really believe that all this is real, but it is, Rylee. It’s real and The Order of the Cronus is still standing because you’re talking about men who have the money and power to make anything happen. It’s rather scary if you think about it long enough. If you think some of these men that make up the history of The Order haven’t killed to make The Order what it is today, then you’re deluding yourself.”
“And let me guess,” I replied. “That’s the bad news, not the worst news, right?”
She nodded. “Because Saxton had wanted me to know what I was dealing with, he had given me a rundown on all the initiates.” She looked regretful again. “Saxton is the calculating type. He assesses. Ross is the patient type. He’s a thinker. Fox is the commanding type. He’s a leader.”
“And…and Stone?”
“Stone is the confrontational type,” she said. “He’s volatile, Rylee.”
My chest felt like it’d just been kicked in. “He’s going to do everything he said he would, isn’t he?”
Kincaid nodded. “If you don’t love him, if you have absolutely no tender emotions for him, whatsoever, then I say you fight him until only one of you is left standing,” she said passionately. “But if you love him, or care for him-in any way-then, Rylee, find a way to forgive him or else you will have destroyed your life, and the life of the people you love, for nothing. For pride.”
Mulling her words over in my head, I said the only thing I could. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Do you care about him?”
The tears came out of nowhere. “A lot more than I should.”