Day 16
Kindness
What Is Kindness?
But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ—by grace you have been saved.
Ephesians 2:4–5
Kindness is an often-misunderstood concept. It’s usually thought of as a synonym to niceness. But kindness isn’t about being a nice person. There are lots of really nice people in the world who know nothing about the Holy Spirit. In fact, you don’t have to have the Holy Spirit in order to be nice to people. No, kindness is much deeper than that and much more challenging to human nature. That’s because kindness is a synonym for grace, not niceness. Most people are nice to people they believe deserve their niceness or because being nice makes them feel good. But kindness is based on the idea that though they don’t deserve it—and worse yet, they may even deserve the opposite—you are going to serve them what God has served you, and that’s grace overflowing.
This is the key: kindness is an imitation of God. You can’t take God’s grace in the face of your failure and sin and then turn around and fail to give grace to others. That’s called hypocrisy. But as a girl who has been given much grace, you are free to give much in return, and in that grace or kindness that you share with others, you offer the same things that have been given you. You offer compassion, mercy, sympathy, forgiveness, and generosity. That means that kindness is really something offered to people who are not giving you kindness in return. It’s for people who irritate you, hurt you, or even hate you, because it is the offering of God’s grace in the face of their failure. Being kind to those you love isn’t a bad thing, but it doesn’t require the fruit of the Spirit, because it counts on their kindness in return. But the fruit of the Spirit called kindness is born in struggle and difficulty through the power of the Spirit. The Spirit gives you access to the kindness of God so that you might share it with those in need who don’t want to return it or aren’t equipped to. So kindness means being slow to anger in the face of anger-building situations. It means being hospitable to strangers, which means people who can do nothing for you. And it means being tenderhearted to those who don’t deserve your mercy or compassion.
How will they know you are a God Girl? By your love! And how do you love the way God loves? By loving the unlovable. Unbelievers love those who love them back, so just showing that type of concern for others doesn’t honor God; it only confirms human nature. But when you are kind to the ugly and the mean, then you point people to the life of Christ in you. Then you feed them the fruit of the Spirit and reveal to them that there is more to this life than meets the eye, and there is an unseen force at work in your very nature, remaking you into his likeness.
Many people do absolutely deserve your wrath. They deserve to be taught a lesson, to be hurt like they hurt you, but kindness doesn’t give people what they deserve, because that would be inconsistent with the grace of God. If you want to lead others to Christ—if you want them to experience the love, joy, peace, and patience that you have experienced from knowing him—then you must refuse the opportunity to hurt them for hurting you. Instead, you must do something crazy and give them the kindness they do not deserve. When you do, the fruit of the Spirit will not only feed them but also feed you as it reminds you of the undeserved kindness you first received from God.
- Describe It
Look again at what you just read and pull out everything you can that describes kindness. Think about what it means to be kind as an action, not just a feeling. Then look at your behavior toward difficult people in this light. Are you offering biblical kindness to others, or do you need some more Holy Spirit help?
- Ask Yourself
Colossians 3:17 says, “Whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” (NIV). Ask yourself if this is true of your relationships with difficult people. Do you do it all in the name of Jesus? What do you think that means?
Think about your kindness. Spend some time considering who you are kind to and how much kindness you reserve from giving to those you don’t like. Then ask yourself why you withhold it. Are your motives selfish? If so, confess your unkindness to God and ask him to give you the opportunity for change.
What are some ways you can be kind to the people you see every week?
- Pray It
Dear God, teach me your grace and mercy. Give me an understanding of your kindness to those who don’t deserve it. Help me to mimic you by giving others more than they deserve. Amen.
- Practice It
As you go out into the world today, find someone to be kind to and show God’s grace. It doesn’t take much; it just requires a heart for the hurting. Smile at the angry person; ask the unfriendly sales clerk about their day; care for the waiter who serves you. Ask a stranger their name and make a new acquaintance. Find a chance to give grace and mercy to those who you really want to get even with for their unkindness, and share the fruit of the Spirit with those who desperately need it.