Troy parked his car at the entrance to the campground. He jumped out and tore into the forest. He would find Blake.
The trees towered over him like judgmental sentries, promising to report back to his father. Troy found the familiar path and followed Blake’s scent.
There! Ahead, Blake stood at his campsite. The sleeping bag and camping stove were packed, his backpack sat next to the motorcycle, and Blake tinkered with the wheel. Troy ran to him.
“Blake!” Troy shouted, a smile on his face.
Blake looked up. The loving eyes from the night before had turned hard.
“What are you doing here?” Blake asked.
“I’m ready to leave with you,” Troy said, “just like we talked about. Why wait? Let’s go. I want to be with you.”
Blake stood and brushed hair out of Troy’s eyes. He ran his fingers down the planes of Troy’s cheek, tracing his soft skin. Troy reached forward, placing his hand against Blake’s chest. He could feel Blake’s heartbeat.
Blake leaned down and kissed Troy. His lips were soft but salty with sweat. Blake’s stubble tickled Troy’s cheek. Troy leaned into him, sliding his tongue over Blake’s bottom lip, willing him to open and give Troy access to his mouth. Blake’s lips parted. Their tongues mingled, dancing the dance they had mastered over the last few days. Troy ran his hands around Blake’s sides and over his back, intertwining his fingers at Blake’s tailbone. He wanted to stay here forever.
Blake finally broke the kiss.
“You can’t come with me,” he said.
Troy, still clinging to him, said, “What are you talking about.”
Blake detached himself from Troy. Troy felt suddenly cold, exposed in the woods.
Blake said, “Look, the road is a lot harder than you think. A lot of guys like you think they can cut it, but it isn’t a party.”
“I know that.”
“I’m not sure you do,” said Blake. “Listen, I can’t be accountable for someone else right now. I am not going to be able to make sure you’re safe everywhere you go.”
“I can take care of myself,” said Troy.
Blake shook his head and ran a hand over his face.
“I’m sorry that I said you could come with me. It was in the moment. I didn’t want you to feel like...”
Troy felt tears pricking at the corners of his eyes. He would not cry.
“Like what? Like you used me for sex? Like you lied to me? I love you. You love me. At least you did yesterday.”
“I do love you-”
“It doesn’t seem like it.”
Blake took a step toward him. “When you’re eighteen, everything seems like the end of the world. This isn’t that, I promise. You have a good thing going on here, you’re the son of the alpha in a pack that cares for each other. You have a good life here.”
“Don’t pretend that you know my life,” Troy said, voice icy.
Blake sighed. “I don’t, I’m not. I just mean... “
He reached up and pulled off the agate necklace he always wore. He handed the necklace to Troy. Troy did not move.
“Please take it,” Blake said. “It’s my good luck charm. I want you to have it. I’ve given you such bad luck I need you to have something to balance it out.”
“You didn’t give me bad luck,” Troy said. He took the necklace. The stone was smooth and cool to the touch.
“I did,” Blake said, “and I misled you. I’m sorry. I can get caught up in the people I meet along the road. You’re different than the others... but that doesn’t mean you can come with me.”
“Then stay,” said Troy.
“I can’t,” said Blake. “You know I can’t. I have a job lined up in Iowa. I start in two days. I’m leaving now.”
“Will I see you again?”
Blake shrugged, “Maybe.”
Blake threw a leg over the motorcycle. Troy reached out to grab him but let his hand drop.
“Just tell me one thing,” Troy said. “Did you just want to fuck me? Or did you really feel something for me?”
“I told you,” Blake said, “I love you.”
‘I don’t believe you,” said Troy.
“Yeah,” said Blake. “I know.”
Troy turned and the motorcycle revved to life. He did not watch as Blake disappeared into the trees. The air still smelled of him and Troy felt fat tears leaking out from under his eyelashes. He did not wipe them away.
***
Troy did not remember getting back home. He didn’t remember packing his suitcase or standing in the kitchen, staring at his father and brother. He felt empty. He was resolved.
“It’s time to leave,” said his father. “Your flight leaves in two hours.
“Where is Bekah?” Troy asked.
“She’s at a sleepover,” said Brandon.
“Tell her goodbye for me?”
Brandon said, “Of course.”
Troy hugged his brother and followed his father to the car. They pulled away from his childhood home and Troy watched as the perfect row of rental cabins disappeared into the distance.
“I’m glad you decided to go,” Troy’s father said. “This will be good for you.”
“I’m only going,” said Troy, “so I can get away from you. I am never going to speak to you again.”
“You will,” said his father. “When you’re a man, you will.”
Troy stared out the window and wondered what happened to wolves who didn’t have a mate.